After the ending, I want to die too

Chapter 13



Episode 13

A feeling of nakedness, shame, and embarrassment struck Theo’s entire body.

Theo desperately crawled out of the candle’s reach. If he stepped into the light, his whole body would be on fire.

“Hmph! Hmph!”

Hestia coughed and turned away quickly. The sight of Theo’s wide eyes and flushed face gave her the illusion that she was catching the heat as well.

If Theo hadn’t been blushing and embarrassed, Hestia wouldn’t have been so embarrassed.

What……. It was a bit of a surprise to see a child’s body, really, I just thought it was a child…….

The awkward, awkward silence only added to the heat between them.

“Now, wait a minute, he, stay where you are, don’t turn around!”

Hestia nodded furiously at Theo’s stuttered exclamation, covering her eyes with one hand entirely.

Theo walked slowly, his hand clutching the towel covering his body.

Gulp.

An unrecognizable throaty sound added to the tension.

Suddenly, Hestia’s voice was tinged with embarrassment,

“Oh! Oh, if you’re going to get your clothes, my dear, there are new ones in the basket here…….”

I hastily added, grabbing whatever clothes I could find from the basket in front of me.

“Ah…….”

Theo stopped in his tracks and stared at the clothes Hestia was holding behind her arm.

Even my clothes were now on the rack past her.

“Look, don’t look, don’t move!”

Theo took a few quick steps toward Hestia. He didn’t forget to be thorough.

Dab!

Theo quickly tugged at her clothes, hoping to touch her.

Tadadak!

Bam!

He ducked into his room at a speed that would never be repeated.

“Phew…….”

Hestia’s tense body relaxed, and she leaned back against the table with her hands on her hips.

“What’s with you, little girl, you’re so shy, and you’re so embarrassed.”

Why the hell was he wearing only a towel?

Theo’s lines were too thick to be called a child or a kid. He was skinny, and his densely packed muscles looked harder than most adults.

And he was only 14 years old.

Hestia clucked her tongue at the way kids were developing these days.

“I’m going to have to make dinner for …….”

Shaking Theo out of her head, Hestia began to organize her basket.

First, she hid the hair dye and the forbidden book deep in a drawer, for it was a capital offense to be caught with the forbidden book, and she could be eaten alive by crows.

I didn’t want to suffer for nothing, not when I couldn’t die anyway.

One by one, the basket was emptied, and the table was set with food from the village.

“Me…….”

Theo called out to Hestia as the dinner was just about finished.

“Ah. Are you home?”

At the sound of his voice, Hestia turned and looked at Theo.

“I was wondering if……. These clothes, are they mine……?”

Theo’s brow narrowed as he fiddled with the white ribbon tie on his light blue shirt. There was a look of discomfort on his face as if he didn’t like what he was wearing.

But.

“Wow! It looks great on you! It’s the perfect size!”

Hestia’s eyes sparkled, and she flashed a satisfied smile.

“……These clothes are so. Very. I’ve. only. worn. them. when. I. was. younger.”

Seeing the look on her face, Theo couldn’t bring himself to deny it, so he quickly expressed his dislike for the outfit.

Hestia noticed his pouting expression as well,

“You’re still young enough. It looks good on you!”

She didn’t bother to give him another outfit, just smiled and fixed his crooked tie.

Because it really, truly did look good on him.

Theo wondered if Hestia was trying to tease him, but to his surprise, it seemed genuine.

“…….”

Theo swallowed hard at the frustration he wanted to pour out.

It wasn’t like he was going to stand in front of anyone in this outfit anyway, so it was more of a compromise.

Until, of course, Hestia pulled out another outfit.

“I have other clothes! Would you like to see them?”

There’s nothing like the joy of seeing something you picked out and bought look good on someone else……!

Hestia’s eyes lit up with anticipation and she pointed to the new clothes on the rack.

“Ah…….”

At the same time, Theo’s eyes widened in disbelief.

No matter how he looked at it, this wasn’t it.

“Pink, yellow, chartreuse……. Uh……. Lace……?”

Theo’s brow narrowed as he spat out each word.

This was not the reaction Hestia had expected, and she fidgeted with her fingers.

“Uh, well……. You don’t like……?”

Hestia let out an embarrassed laugh and looked away.

It looked really good on her, but if the person wearing it didn’t like it, that was one thing.

Theo stared at Hestia for a moment, then straightened his expression.

“……No, I love it, thank you very much.”

He flashed her a graceful smile as if he hadn’t realized it.

The gift of such pure goodwill was so unfamiliar that it was enough to make him feel unaccustomed.

“It’s been a long time since I’ve received a gift like this……, so I’m not sure what to say.”

And then she spoke with such sincerity.

I could feel her sincerity, and I wanted to reciprocate in some small way.

Hestia responded to Theo’s sincerity with a wry smile,

“Mmm……. It’s too early to be this impressed.”

She gestured at the items organized on one side of the table.

“I don’t know how long you’ll be staying here, but consider it a nice landlord’s convenience…… to make you comfortable while you’re here.”

There were cups, forks, saucers, plates, teacups, blankets, and other new things gleaming in the room that didn’t belong in an old house.

No, maybe they were old, but they shone.

Theo closed his eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. He pressed his lips together as if to hold onto the emotion he was feeling.

When he opened them, his golden eyes flashed with a complex mix of emotions.

“I must …… this reward.”

Theo spoke for the first time in a long time, unsure of what to say, but Hestia cut him off.

“I don’t need a reward. I have tons of money.”

Hestia gave him a disapproving look and narrowed her eyes.

“…….”

Theo just rolled his eyes and looked around the house.

“It’s just the way the house is. Haven’t you ever heard that things aren’t always what they seem?”

“No, I’ve heard it, I believe it, and thank you so much for the gifts. I’ll put them to good use, I mean it…….”

Theo took a step back, amused by Hestia’s pointed tone.

“You should have said that a long time ago.”

Hestia smiled a satisfied smile,

“Come on, let’s eat, it’s cold, but it’s still delicious.”

Her sparkling eyes widened and she gave a cheerful toss.

It wasn’t until Theo sat down across the table from her that the meal began.

After a hearty meal, Theo washed down our mouths with mint tea, and it was already dark outside.

“Do you believe me, ……Hestia? I could be the one running away with a terrible sin.”

Theo swirled his teacup, carefully voicing the question he’d been harboring.

“Well, I don’t know. I guess it doesn’t matter to me if you trust someone or not.”

“Even when ……your life could be in danger because of me?”

“It doesn’t matter to me, especially if it involves her life.”

But to Hestia’s dismay, the cautiousness of her answer was not lost on her as she inhaled the tea deeply.

“Why would you risk your life…….”

Theo was about to ask a deeper question, but he couldn’t.

Dahlgrak.

“Now let’s get you ready for bed, the earlier you sleep the better you grow.”

Hestia smiled softly, setting down her empty glass and standing up.

“I brought you pajamas again.”

With a confident strut, she pulled a yellow one off the rack and handed it to Theo.

“…….”

Theo stares at the garment with his jaw clenched but doesn’t reach out to take it.

There’s a glimmer of resolve in the boy’s eyes as if he’s making a decision.

“Gam, I apologize.”

Very slowly, Theo reached out and took the garment, his gaze never leaving the pattern on the shirt.

“I heard it’s a popular pattern for kids these days. Aren’t bunnies cute?”

Hestia smiled proudly as she pointed out the dozens of tiny bunnies on the pajamas.

“It’s ……. They’re really…… cute.”

Meeting her smile, Theo had to hide a low giggle.

“Hurry up and get changed and get ready.”

Theo jumped to his feet as Hestia hurried to clear the table.

“Let’s clean up together.”

Theo rolled up his shirt sleeves to help, but Hestia stopped him.

“Forget it, you’re in the way, go back inside.”

Hestia shoved Theo into the room with his pajamas,

“I’ll be back to see if you’re asleep or not!”

Snap.

She slammed the door behind her.

Quickly cleaning up, Hestia took a shower and opened the door. It was to check on Theo’s sleeping arrangements.

Immediately, Hestia sensed something was wrong.

“Huh?”

There was no more clanging.

Hestia nudged the small door back and forth. The squeaky door was now silent and smooth.

“Not bad. You know how to do this.”

A warm smile spread across Hestia’s face. She looked around the room and realized that the shelves had been tilted, the chair had found its balance, and the floor was dust-free.

Where only her own hands had touched, she could feel the marks of others.

She couldn’t tell how long it had been since she had felt this kind of touch, this kind of warmth, this kind of care.

“This pushes me to do my best again.”

Hestia’s life had been nothing more than time standing still, without excitement or regret.

At some point in the distant past, I tried my best, I tried my hardest, I tried to weep in regret.

But all I got back was a feeling of emptiness, deprivation, alienation, betrayal, contempt, and all sorts of negative things.

So I let go.

No craving, no greed, no need, no will.


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