Aristocrat (HP/SI)

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Young Grosvenor was absolutely loath to risk his head even for the hypothetical possibility of living to see advanced nanorobots and genetic engineering. Not the fact that there was a Philosopher's Stone hidden at Hogwarts. Therefore, the boy has turned on his wits to at least minimise the risks and still get a profit even if the Philosopher's Stone turns out to be just a Harry Potter fantasy.

To begin with, obstacles must be removed. The first is Dumbledore. He is a powerful wizard who should not be at school at the time of the operation to "save the stone". The second is the teachers. McGonagall will not willingly leave her office. Sprout disappears to the greenhouses all the time. Flitwick's a complete nuisance, according to the senior students, he's never been seen on patrol. And the Ravenclaw students fighting in front of everyone showed his real attitude towards the students. He could be left out of the equation as well, just like most of the other professors. Snape, on the other hand, patrols the corridors of the castle like a kite. Quirrell is a dark horse, he's kind of a stutterer and acts like a battered wimp, but he conjures powerfully. And that's suspicious. Then there's Argus Filch, the school caretaker. Hence the need to temporarily eliminate Snape and Quirrell, and perhaps something to distract Filch.

Richard began extensive preparations. He did not choose the date of the operation, as it was a pointless endeavour.

The first thing the boy did was to write several letters to various people. Then he called Mr Weasley and clarified whether it was realistic to make a proposal to the Minister of Magic to pass a law that would allow to enchant Muggle equipment not only for the personal needs of wizards, but also for sale to ordinary people under the guise of advanced technology. Naturally, on the condition that the enchanted things would be disguised as advanced technology and equipped with self-destruct charms.

It turned out that the British Ministry of Magic such a law can not be adopted due to the statute of secrecy, that is, it should be promoted to the International Confederation of Mages (ICM). And this in turn will allow to lure Dumbledore out of the country. And in this case, passing the law is a higher priority.

After prolonged questioning, it became clear to Richard that some members of the ICM such a law would be favourable. Their wizards would be able to sell magical products to ordinary people under the guise of high-tech. Moreover, something similar had already been proposed several times by ICM members from the USA, USSR, Japan and Germany. That is, at least four votes can be considered to be already in the pocket. Mages from poor countries even in such serious international organisation, which adopts laws for the whole magical community of the planet, take bribes. By the standards of ordinary people, the price tag of Africans and South Americans is ridiculous, but by the standards of magicians, their demands are quite decent.

In the International Confederation of Magicians each country is represented by a small delegation, which does not play a special role, only its leader - the Chairman of the Delegation, who is proposed by the Ministry of Magic and approved by the Wizengamot. But the approval is purely formal, although the elders of the Wizengamot can refuse to appoint him to the position if they wish, and have the right to nominate their own representative.

Albus Dumbledore is currently the President of the Confederation, something like the Speaker of the House, that is, he has no special power, but he can do some things. Therefore, he cannot be the Chairman of the UK at the same time.

Ritchie came to the ICM President from England through a recommendation from Madame Marchbanks and with the help of owl correspondence hinted at a good score, to which he received the same hints of a positive response. The only thing left to do was to send his man to drop off the treasury.

The ICM has just over a hundred Chairmen. The votes of most of them are needed to pass the law. Those countries that dance to the tune of the USA and the USSR will surely vote in favour of this law. What's left is to buy the votes of the Third World Chairmen. Judging by the British wizard's rates, it's not more than fifty thousand galleons.

Richie had given Mr Weasley carte blanche to spend a million galleons on bribes to the Chairmen of the MCM. It wasn't enough to make a significant difference, but at the moment the boy was limited in magical cash. The whole calculation was that the cumulative votes would be enough for a favourable decision.

Richard had had to use many arguments in his magophone conversation with Arthur Weasley to convince him that such a law was necessary for the prosperity of wizards everywhere. Mr Weasley proved too honest to offer anyone a bribe. Still, Earl Grosvenor managed to find arguments to convince Arthur. He both frightened him with the danger of degradation of wizards with the active growth of Muggle technologies and convinced him that such a step was necessary to maintain the magical economy, and, most importantly, for wizards to go into space and find a new planet where wizards could live happily without Muggles, could have as much land there as they wished, could do whatever they wanted without regard to the statute of secrecy, could settle magical animals on another planet and breed them in huge quantities to obtain a large number of ingredients for potions and other things. And to find such a planet and generally go into space, you need to somehow interact with ordinary people: buy steel and other things from them to build a spaceship. Better to make purchases by selling something of one's own, disguised as Muggle products, than to steal and thus more seriously violate the statute of secrecy.

Besides being honest, Arthur turned out to be a gullible idealist, so after three such conversations, Richie had not only convinced Mr Weasley, but had infected him with unprecedented enthusiasm. Arthur set about the task at hand - getting the bribes to the right wizards.

Oh and it's a hard business - international politics, both for ordinary people and wizards. But the point is the same - all politicians are corrupt, it's just that some of them have too exorbitant a price tag. But Richard saw it as training, because in the future he would have to sit in the House of Lords.

Ritchie did not intend to leave his seat in the House of Lords to the elected Lords. The regime of work there is extremely gentle: an hour and a half a day three times a week. At the same time, each hour of work is well paid, plus reimbursed travel expenses, even if you get to the place by helicopter. But that's not all. Aristocrat with a hereditary seat in the House of Lords immediately shine very high career prospects, you can take the post of minister or become no less important figure. And this is a lot of money, a lot of legal ways of tax evasion, which are not only turned a blind eye to, they are even tacitly encouraged. After all, there are many Windsors in government, their own people with huge fortunes. Who's going to take it out on the family? Hand washes hand.

By the way, a trust fund is not only a way to protect a fortune from passing into the wrong hands, but also a great way to avoid taxes, for example, the heirs of a share in such a company will not pay a penny, and with a regular inheritance they would have to shell out forty per cent of the market value of the property. So Ritchie was going to transfer "Grosvenor Junior" in the future under the wing of the trust fund, because his company seems to be a daughter of the "Grosvenor Group", but on paper an independent company. In general, as it is common in big finances, everything is confused, so that people from the street was little clear, and their own will figure out what to what.

Count Grosvenor spent a lot of time and nerves on all matters - October flew by in a flash.

He had to spend a lot of time practising McGonagall's spells, and there was no time left for potions. Surely Richie would have been able to learn a lot of new charms, which could be found in the library in huge quantities, but Madame Marchbanks' classes were taking their toll. The young wizard was fanatical about perfecting any new spell, whether it was turning a match into a needle or a snail into a teapot.

In general, the formulas for transfiguration spells were universal. That is, if you learnt how to turn a match into a needle, you could turn a log into a sword or a shovel, an axe, and so on. So Richie went from matches to a small stick, which he turned into a knife, spoon, fork, bailer, spanners, screwdrivers, pliers, side cutters, scissors, and even a multitool, and then began to transform the bar, creating more weighty and complex steel products. The next stage was to get rid of the verbal component.

For all her dislike of the young Lord, Professor McGonagall had to give him top marks.

And potions... It wasn't his thing. It was not for an aristocrat to brew potions in a cauldron, so Snape's comments to Richard were constantly unflattering. But again, all to the point. And Richie knows how to listen, as well as how to extract information. Where a normal child would hear a rebuke and ignore the remark and take offence, Ritchie was able to pick out the gist of it, so he took the remarks to heart and never made such mistakes again, which was why he made magic soups not much worse than Ravenclaw students and was the best of his fellow Puffenduys at it.When Richard woke up on Halloween morning, he smelled baked pumpkin, an indispensable attribute of the holiday. The aroma seemed to permeate the whole of Hogwarts, but in fact it was the proximity of the Puffendu dormitory to the kitchen.

It was the day Professor Flitwick announced that he thought the students were finally ready to begin the study of charms that many of them had long dreamed of. And only Richie was disappointed, because as a spell the teacher gave levitation charms, which young Grosvenor could conjure in the middle of the night with his eyes closed, non-verbally and even without a wand.

Throughout the lesson, Richard was bored, he quietly completed the task without demonstrating his full capabilities, making the quill float, much to the professor's delight.

As the Puffendoo and Ravenclaw students left the charms class, Justin said:

- Richie, that's not fair! You learnt that spell before school.

- It's all fair," Richard replied nonchalantly. - Anyone could hire a tutor and practise making magic. For example, you, Justin, had a whole month before Hogwarts. The fact that you wasted it on a holiday is entirely your problem.

Padma Patil, who was walking next to me, noticed:

- 'Richie, I've heard that students aren't allowed to conjure in the summer.

- Padma, darling, it's students," Richard said, a sly smile on his face. - We weren't even students at Hogwarts yet. Besides, I've been learning from my charms tutor about how young wizards are supervised.

- Yeah?" Padma gave Richard a curious look. - How?

- During the school year, representatives of the Ministry of Magic from the Department of Magical Education visit the home of a first-year wizard who lives among ordinary people. They put on the territory of the student's residence tracking charms, which react to the use of magic with a wand and transmit a message about it to the artefact. So, let's say there is only one young wizard living in a small town, then the spell will be cast on the whole town. If there are many wizards in the town, then the spell will cover the house and a small neighbouring area. In my case, the spell should cover the entire estate, unless the wizards are killed by the guards, which is a possibility.

- Killed?! - Ernie MacMillan, walking at Justin's side, rounded his eyes in amazement.

- What did you think, Ernie? This is not just any man's estate, but the Duke's! Our guards are worse than the Queen's, but after one incident," Richie grimaced at the memory of the duel with the bad swordsman, "and learning of the mages' abilities, my father beefed up the security. Video cameras, motion detectors, thermal imaging, and squibs to make sure possible terrorist wizards didn't fool the guards.

Justin whistled and said in surprise:

- Wow! Richie, I hadn't noticed you had such guards.

- That's right, because good guards are supposed to be invisible," Ritchie replied. - Professor McGonagall didn't notice anyone but the guards at the gate, and she was being held at gunpoint by a pro hidden in a niche during her visit.

- Ritchie, do you have secret passages in your house? - Justin continued to marvel.

- Jas, our estate was built two hundred years ago. The first Duke of Westminster was concerned for his safety. There were crossbowmen in the hidden recesses in those days, and now the guards are armed with pistols, but nothing has changed. It's the same at the Queen's reception. You seem to be standing quietly, not noticing anything, but in fact, if you try to do something to Her Majesty, they will not leave a wet spot.

Patil was interested in witchcraft on holiday, so she returned to the old topic:

- Richie, you said you can't do witchcraft with a wand. Can you brew potions?

- Potions you can," Richard nodded. - You can do magic without a wand, too.

- But what if someone else does? - Patil continued to ask.

- Then you're out of luck," Grosvenor replied. - You'll have to prove that you're not a camel, that is, you didn't sorcery.

- What if I use my wand in a place where no wizard lives, or, on the contrary, in a place where wizards live? - Padma asked.

- You can cast a spell," answered Richie. - The main thing is not in front of wizards. Tracking spells are useless in the places where wizards live, because they will react to any wand spell. And the whole country can't be covered with tracking charms, and you can't put a magical policeman on every corner.

- So," Justin said, "children of pureblood wizards can do magic on holidays?

- They can.

- They can? - Justin interjected.

- They can!

- That's not fair! - Justin frowned.

- Jas, mate," said Richard, "is life fair? Some people are born with a silver spoon in their mouths, and some people don't know if they're going to have a crust of bread for breakfast. Why are you fixated on this peasant fiction? Justice... It doesn't exist and never has!

- Wait a minute! - exclaimed the dumbfounded Macmillan. - Richie, you speak so calmly of the Queen's guards that it seems as if you had seen Her Majesty.

- Well, yes," Richard shrugged his shoulders. - How am I supposed to talk about it? I see Grandma Lisa about ten times a year: at birthdays, at Christmas dinner, at a charity event. Although I'm going to have to miss a lot of events this year because of school.

- Grandma Lisa?! - McMillan's voice became hysterical. - GRANDMA LISA?!

Richie rolled his eyes dramatically and said:

- Ernie, you and I have been sharing a bedroom for two months and you've only just realised that I'm a member of the royal family... Did it bother you that I'm an earl at such a young age?

- Merlin! - said the dumbfounded Macmillan in one breath. - Richie, you know, it's hard to believe such a thing... Malfoy, for example, is a Lord too, but he can't boast of having seen the Queen.

- Ernie, only Lucius Malfoy is a Lord to begin with," Richard explained. - Draco is still a commoner and will remain one until his father dies and he inherits the title of Baron. And secondly, who would let a terrorist in to see the Queen? Let Malfoy enjoy his freedom and not attract the monarch's attention.

- Is there anything a Muggle queen can do to wizards? - Macmillan asked.

- 'Ernie, what do you think? - Ritchie replied. - Queen Victoria was friends with Evangeline Orpington, who suddenly became Minister of Magic at the end of the nineteenth century. If Madame Marchbanks is to be believed, Elizabeth the Second's grandmother, Mary of Teck, didn't like the then Minister of Magic, who had introduced a law forbidding Muggles from helping in the First World War. He had been in office from 1912 to 1923, and then he suddenly disappeared, and the Minister of Magic was replaced by an inactive weirdo who communicated with the help of smoke from his wand.

- Eh..." Padma sighed dreamily. - I wish I could visit the royal palace.

- It can be organised," Richard rubbed his chin thoughtfully. - Sometimes the Queen gathers industrialists at her palace to establish a close dialogue. But she's been lukewarm about them for some time now.

- Why? - Patil seemed to be bursting with curiosity.

- One day it started raining during the reception," Richie continued. - The dozen or so industrial guests who were in the garden at the time hid from the rain under the awning where Her Majesty was having tea. And when they dispersed, the servants were missing seventeenth-century silver cutlery. Granny was upset - it was her favourite tea set. The spoons were missing, and the residue remained.

Padma laughed a melodious laugh.

- Richie, I promise we won't steal the Queen's cutlery," she said in a cheerful tone.

- Padma, I'll talk to Uncle Charlie over the holidays. I can't promise anything, but perhaps you and your sister and your parents will be invited to one of the receptions in the summer.

- Thank you, Richie!

Padma glowed with happiness and hugged Grosvenor in a burst of emotion. It was in just such a savoury pose that Hermione, who had suddenly emerged from the corner, found Richard. The girl, as always, was in a hurry, but she was frozen as if frozen. The bag fell out of Granger's hands with a clatter. Her lips trembled treacherously.

- Hermione," Richie released himself from Padma's embrace and gave the Gryffindor student a welcoming smile. - 'Good afternoon. It's good to see you. Are you upset about something?

Grosvenor approached Granger and helped her lift the heavy bag.

- Oh, it's heavy," he said. - Do you still prefer to carry all your textbooks with you?

Hermione silently grabbed her bag out of Richard's hands. She immediately darted backwards and disappeared around the corner. Richard noticed the tears on her cheeks, it alarmed him.

- It was strange, she didn't even say hello," Richie said worriedly.

- I think she was jealous of me," Padma said.

- What's wrong with these girls? - Richard muttered quietly. - We're not even brides and grooms to be jealous of hugs... And I wanted to tell Hermione that they're going to learn their first spell today in charms.

- Never mind," Justin said lightly. - Girls! Who'll understand them...

- Boys! - Padma snorted. - What do you know about a woman's vulnerable soul? Richie, you owe your friend an apology.

- Me?! Richard jabbed his right index finger into his chest. - Apologise?! Apologise for what?

- Fool! Padma said. - 'It doesn't matter why, it matters that Hermione was offended by you. So you must apologise, or your friendship may be over.

- That's not good.

Richard was worried about the possibility of losing such a valuable agent. It's a stupid situation, but maybe Padma's right. It's not worth the risk.

- After class, I'll pick her up and talk to her," Richard voiced his decision.

"Still, there's a gap in my upbringing," he continued mentally. - For some reason no one bothered to explain to me the psychology of women. In my previous life I had enough holonet with its virtual beauties to not even think about meeting a real girl from reality. And Hermione's just a little girl. Why the jealousy of another girl? Or is that normal? Gods, give me strength! I've had enough of magical politics and criminality, now I have to puzzle over what's going on in girls' heads..."

After the last lesson, Richie stormed out of the classroom and raced towards the charms room. Not far from it he found a crowd of Gryffindor freshmen. Surprisingly, he didn't see Hermione.

- Harry," he picked Potter out of the crowd, "hello. Where's Granger?

- I don't know," Potter shrugged. - 'She wasn't in charms class. Did something happen? Hermione looked upset. I think she was crying. Did you two have a fight?

- Oh, just the usual girl stuff. I saw my Ravenclaw friend hugging me, thought of something and freaked out. I don't care that we're only eleven years old.

- Girls are weird," Potter said. - Do you want me to help you look for Hermione?

- No need, Harry. If I come in for a private chat with my mate, it'll only make things worse. We'll sort it out ourselves. I just need to find her.

- I could look in the lounge and call you," Harry suggested. - You won't be in our dormitory.

- Thanks, Harry. If you see Hermione or know where she is, call me. I'll check in the library.

Richie went upstairs to the library, but Granger was not there. As he stood there pondering where to go next, the magophone in his pocket rang.

- Hello.

- Richie, it's me, Harry. Hermione didn't return to the living room. But Lavender Brown said she'd seen Granger crying in the first floor ladies' room and wouldn't calm down, begging to be left alone.

- Thank you, Harry. You've been a big help.

- Richie, are you coming to dinner? It's supposed to be all festive tonight. I saw Professor Flitwick decorating the Great Hall with enchanted bats and flying pumpkins.

- I'll do my best. I just need to reassure a lady.

- You're going to the ladies' room! - Potter was horrified.

- What's the big deal? - Richie asked sneeringly. - Worried about my reputation? It's not like we live in Japan, so I'm not likely to be labelled a pervert.

- Erm..." Harry was confused. - That's not what I meant. It's just weird for a boy to look in the girls' toilets.

- Don't worry, I'll get over the sight of a crying girl somehow.

After talking to Potter, Richard went down to the first floor. Upon reaching the girls' toilet, he was surprised to find a key in the keyhole. This seemed suspicious to Richard. What could a key sticking out the outside of a toilet door be doing?

'Either Filch forgot, or someone decided to mess with Hermione and lock her in the loo,' thought Richie.

Pulling on the handle, the young Grosvenor was surprised to find the door unlocked. He thought that the superintendent had gone sclerotic, since he was forgetting his keys. But he put the bunch of keys in his pocket just in case. In case they were jokers after all....

Hermione Granger stood at the far wall in front of the sink. She turned round at the movement of the door and, noticing the visitor, pressed her lips together and puffed out her cheeks. Her eyes were red and puffy, as if after prolonged crying.

- Go away!

- Hermione, I don't know what you've got in mind, but we need to talk like reasonable people.

- This is the girls' toilets, boys don't belong here! Go away! I don't want to see you.

- Hermione, don't say that. Frankly, I'm no great expert on women's souls, but if I've offended you in any way, I sincerely apologise.

- Go to your Patil...

Granger's lips quivered, and tears were ready to spurt from her eyes again.

- What does this have to do with Patil? We're just friends, just like you and me. Hermione, I could understand your resentment if we were seventeen and a couple, but it's unreasonable to be jealous of a friend of a friend. You don't think a man should have only one friend, do you?

- I had an only friend," Granger muttered quietly.

- You did? If you mean me, I still consider you a friend. Is it really enough to break a friendship if any girl throws herself at me? And if it was a plant, like a prostitute paid to smear my name, would you do the same?

- N-no, but Patil is not a prostitute...

- What's the difference? Padma was just really excited when I promised to organise a tour of the palace for her, she couldn't contain her emotions and hugged me. Nothing erotic or treacherous or anything like that.

- You're offering all the girls a tour of the palace?! - Granger asked in an offended tone.

- No. Only either to the cute and frustrated ones, like you looked when we first met, or if it brings useful connections to people like the Patils.

- Patils? What good are a couple of pretty sorceresses! - Granger asked with bitter irony.

- There could be different benefits from twin girls, of course, but if their father is a millionaire who may soon become a billionaire, such acquaintances are good for business. Anyway, it's too early for us to think about what's on your mind.

- I'm not thinking about anything like that....

Hermione's cheeks flushed traitorously, giving her away.

- Wait!" she decided to change the subject, following the 'best defence is attack' tactic. - The Patil sisters are the daughters of a multi-millionaire?

- You didn't know? - Richard was surprised. - I knew it as soon as I heard their last name.

- So you're friends with Padma out of self-interest? - Granger asked. - Me too?

- Hermione, it should be realised that a man of my class can't be friends with just anyone. The tutors beat it into your brain with a belt on your arse that you shouldn't besmirch your name by associating with the marginalised. It is encouraged to make useful acquaintances. But no one is forbidden to be friends with someone one likes, as long as associating with that person will not damage one's reputation and honour. So Justin and Padma are useful acquaintances. People that any reasonable person of my circle is obliged to be friends with. And you... Hermione, tell me frankly, what useful connections are there from you!

Hermione pouted resentfully.

- 'No offence,' Richard said in a conciliatory tone. - But really, I'm not friends with you because of your dentist parents. I have enough brains of my own. So what selfish purposes could I possibly have in being friends with you?

- You mean you like me? - Granger muttered quietly.

- Of course I do, Hermione. I like your spontaneity, your punchy strength, and your tenacious mind. Let's go to dinner.

- I won't go, everyone will see that I've been crying.

- Then let's go to the kitchen, where only house elves will see you.

- House elves?! - Granger's eyes lit up with curiosity.

- I'll tell you about them and show you on the way.

Hermione hesitated and was ready to leave the bathroom, but her stubborn nature wouldn't let her agree so easily.

The sudden ringing of the magophone made Hermione flinch. Richie pulled a phone, or rather its magical analogue, out of his robes pocket.

- Hello.

Harry Potter's loud and excited voice came from the speaker, with the noise of the panicking crowd in the background:

- Richie, get to the dormitory immediately. There's a troll in the school! Do you hear that? There's a troll in the school!

- A troll?

- Yes, a mountain troll!

- Why would there be a troll in the school?

- I have no idea," Potter replied. - Quirrell said it was in the dungeons, and the Headmaster told everyone to go to the drawing rooms.

- That's just great," Richard said sarcastically. - Harry, thanks for the warning. We ran off to the Hufflepuff drawing room.

Richard, tucking the magophone receiver into his pocket, met Granger's irritated gaze. Hermione crossed her arms over her chest and said in a voice full of disbelief:

- I don't believe it! What kind of nonsense have you come up with? Couldn't you think of a more stupid way to lure me out of the loo?

- Hermione, stop your nonsense! - Richard replied irritably. - This isn't a prank. No-one has agreed on anything. There is actually panic in the Great Hall, from the sounds of it. So, feet in hand - and run to the Hufflepuff dormitory, because it's closer.