Assistant Manager Kim Hates Idols

I sat on the floor of the practice room next to Kang Kiyeon.

 

In the mirror opposite, I saw Kang Kiyeon fiddling nervously with his hands.

 

The awkward atmosphere was suffocating me.

 

Debating whether I should try to lighten the mood, I decided it would be better to set the stage rather than be considerate, so I spoke up first.

 

“If you have something to say, feel free to speak up.”

 

Despite this, Kang Kiyeon did not immediately start talking.

 

Did he want me to make some small talk? I didn’t think he was the type to have difficulty expressing himself.

 

Fortunately, Kang Kiyeon opened his mouth after a short while.

 

“I was wondering if I could get some advice… about dealing with nervousness.”

 

Surprisingly, the reason Kang Kiyeon had requested this meeting was his ‘need for advice’.

 

It seemed my courage in not messing up the first evaluation had left an impression.

 

‘There’s no one in Spark who seems mentally strong… except Choi Jeho.’

 

Though Jeong Seongbin would eventually become quite resilient, at this point, they were all just kids.

 

And he couldn’t consult with Choi Jeho, who was extremely hard to talk to.

 

So, by process of elimination, I was the only one left.

 

‘I’ll give him credit for having the willingness to seek advice even from a klutz if there’s something he needs help with.’

 

It took courage to directly receive criticism from others. This aspect was truly admirable.

 

As I was genuinely moved, Kiyeon asked me.

 

“Are you naturally the type who doesn’t get nervous easily, hyung?”

 

“I wasn’t extremely nervous, but I wouldn’t say I wasn’t nervous at all. I think I was pretty average.”

 

“How did you overcome your nervousness?”

 

Well, I overcame it by getting brutally ripped apart by Manager Nam in front of executives.

 

I closed my eyes, trying hard to forget the scene of the conference room where raised voices were exchanged.

 

Let’s calm down. Kang Kiyeon was a high school student, not a working adult.

 

Instead of introducing Kiyeon to the bitterness of organizational life, I explained my painful memories in the most gentle way possible.

 

“I did a lot of practice that felt like the real thing. Like mock interviews.”

 

“Like the real thing…”

 

Kiyeon murmured, repeated my words.

 

“I imagined failing and making mistakes. Through that, I figured out how to deal with mistakes if they happened, and in what situations I felt the most nervous.”

 

“I’ve done a lot of mock tests, but they weren’t very effective. I even set up cameras.”

 

“If the pressure is less than the real thing, you might still be flustered even after a lot of practice.”

 

After all, no matter how much you prepared for a presentation, if your boss said, ‘Why do you look like that, Assistant Manager Kim?’ you could feel like all the blood drained from your body.

 

“Didn’t the teachers give you any advice?”

 

“They said I’m doing well, so I should just practice as I have been…”

 

As expected of UA. Their advice was gentle.

 

They probably intentionally avoided stimulating the idols, considering how their mental state might deteriorate later.

 

But praise from other people only registered when your ears were open to hear it.

 

Given that he wasn’t able to show his skills yet, compliments that he was doing well probably didn’t resonate much with Kang Kiyeon.

 

“How can I create that pressure?”

 

Kiyeon asked.

 

For my part, I had held countless Q&A sessions with myself, rotating through hundreds of follow-up questions that Manager Nam might ask.

 

Fortunately, I lived alone. If I had a roommate, they would have surely thought I was losing my mind.

 

“I think you might adapt if you set up the nerve-wracking situation as much as possible and practice… But I guess you can’t ask the teachers to create that environment for you every time.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

I thought for a moment and made a suggestion to Kang Kiyeon.

 

“How about I play the role of the judge for you?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Kang Kiyeon’s eyes widened slightly.

 

He had been speaking calmly without raising his voice until now. This must have been unexpected.

 

“You said just setting up a camera wasn’t enough, right? Making the environment and atmosphere more realistic might help.”

 

“But if you talk, the atmosphere might lighten up, wouldn’t we lose the tension?”

 

“Don’t worry. I can play the role of the boomer well.”

 

Kang Kiyeon looked skeptical. He would be surprised by my earnest portrayal that channeled Manager Nam’s soul.

 

I never thought I’d voluntarily do something good for Spark in my life.

 

I decided to think of it as repaying the help I’d received from Kiyeon so far.

 

“Then… I’ll take you up on that offer.”

 

Either because he had no other options or because he was truly desperate, Kiyeon accepted my proposal without much deliberation.

 

“It’s to repay you for watching my practice during the day. If you want to practice at night, just let me know anytime.”

 

“Let’s start tomorrow.”

 

“I really admire your passion.”

 

I didn’t hold back my praise for Kiyeon, who I was certain would have suggested starting today if we had just a little more time left in the practice room.

 

And I briefly added one more thing that had been on my mind:

 

“By the way, you don’t need to hesitate for requests like this.”

 

It was 50,000 times better to see the problem head-on and deal with it than to make things bigger by agonizing over whether to ask for counseling or not.

 

It was the same with fights. It was better to handle conflicts openly rather than let resentment build up in private.

 

Of course, it would be best if they fought and made up before coming to me.

 

‘Considering that he repeatedly asked Choi Jeho to practice together as a group, he’s probably not the type to have difficulty requesting things from others.’

 

Moreover, Kang Kiyeon was surprisingly the type who wouldn’t complain if it was for his goals.

 

That meant he wasn’t the kind of person who would unnecessarily take up separate time just to ask this one thing.

 

Then, Kang Kiyeon gave a rather surprising answer.

 

“Hyung, you seem busy lately, so I was wondering if it would be okay to ask you for a favor.”

 

And with quite an admirable reason, at that.

 

He was completely different from Manager Nam, who would say ‘Assistant Manager Kim, you look busy?’ and then ask me to book a cafe for Spark’s birthday.

 

It was a moment that made my previous thought—that I’d rather eat all the rice cakes myself than give one more to someone I dislike—seem foolish.

 

Right, the humane thing to do was to take the rice cake meant for someone you disliked and give it to someone who worked hard.

 

I thought of Assistant Manager Song, who was the epitome of a hard worker—good-natured, competent, and diligent to boot.

 

Assistant Manager Song, I’m sorry I couldn’t take better care of you before.

 

My spot-on imitation of Manager Nam that made you laugh… I’ll make use of it here too. I hope you don’t work overtime today and have a peaceful evening.

 

Just as I was starting to feel sentimental, I noticed the clock showing 11:50 pm.

 

Before worrying about others, I had to end my own overtime. How bittersweet.

 

* * *

 

After our late-night conversation, my relationship with Kang Kiyeon became a bit more interesting.

 

‘You should move to ‘ddadang-tang’ here, but you’re just doing ‘udang-tang,’ hyung.’

 

‘Sorry about that.’

 

During the day, Kiyeon would grab me by the collar and pull me along…

 

“Kiyeon, don’t let your hand shake. Keep your gaze fixed forward. Straighten your back.”

 

“Yes.”

 

At night, I would hold onto Kiyeon as if catching a mouse.

 

There was a time when Lee Cheonghyeon would stay behind wondering what we were doing at night, only to escape after listening to 20 minutes of me lecturing him about keeping a straight face.

 

“Straighten your shoulders, and your back too. If your posture is slouched, it’ll make you more nervous.”

 

“…I get nervous even when my posture is straight.”

 

“Then why don’t you try lying down on the floor over there for about 3 minutes and then get up?”

 

I meant it as a joke to help him relax, but Kang Kiyeon actually lay down on the floor.

 

He must be really desperate. How frustrating it must be to have an outstanding talent but not be able to show it.

 

With the determination to ensure my dance teacher would shine, I approached Kiyeon as he lay down.

 

“How is it? Do you feel a bit less nervous?”

 

“…Yes. Maybe because it’s comfortable.”

 

Kiyeon’s expression seemed more relaxed, so it wasn’t a lie.

 

Watching Kiyeon regain his breath, I said:

 

“Then get up now. Let’s run the simulation from the beginning again.”

 

Kang Kiyeon got up with great effort. I gave him high marks for his perseverance; not once had he complained about the difficulty.

 

That didn’t mean that Kang Kiyeon was eating up all my practice time.

 

Unintentionally seeing him every day taught me a few things too.

 

Monitoring countless exemplary performances gave me an even more detailed understanding of movements.

 

For example.

 

“It seems like you’re putting less weight on your left foot than before. Is that because you’re tired or because you’re nervous?”

 

“Because I’m tired.”

 

“That must be hard. But you know the teachers won’t take your fatigue into account during evaluation, right?”

 

“…Yes.”

 

When I mentioned that the angle between his index and middle fingers changed with each dance move, Kiyeon’s face clearly showed signs of frustration.

 

Well. What do you want me to do? Even if I didn’t say it, he’d pay attention to it himself later.

 

I asked Kiyeon, who was drenched in cold sweat despite not having moved much.

 

“Have your ankles hurt since then?”

 

“No. I went to the hospital early, so maybe that’s why.”

 

“That’s why you should go to the hospital right away if it hurts. Don’t put it off just because it’s bothersome and make things worse.”

 

“Yes, yes.”

 

Kang Kiyeon answered mechanically, probably used to my nagging.

 

“Still, your movements have become much more natural than they were initially. At least you seem to have adapted to me.”

 

“I feel the same way.”

 

“It might be because I appear soft and don’t set the atmosphere quite right. Maybe it would have been better to have Choi Jeho sit here instead?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Kang Kiyeon made an incredulous expression at my words.

 

“Uh… Hyung, do you really think you come across as soft?”

 

“I think I appear either ordinary or slightly vague.”

 

I was about to say that I probably looked more mushy than a dumpling, but I held back.

 

Otherwise, there was no way Manager Nam would have singled me out to push around just three days after I joined.

 

However, the response I got was truly shocking.

 

“Hyung, um… I don’t know if I should say this.”

 

“Tell me.”

 

“Honestly? Without a filter?”

 

“When have you ever used a filter? Just say it without holding back.”

 

“Hyung, I get scared s**tless just by looking at your face.”

 

…What?

 

“Lee Cheonghyeon thought you were a director, not a trainee, when he first saw you.”

 

“What are these cold-hearted cool-tone kids saying?”

 

“Joowoo hyung said he was so nervous he couldn’t even eat dinner properly the day you first came.”

 

“You’re lying, right?”

 

“It’s true. You’re definitely giving off plenty of pressure, so you don’t need to worry about that part.”

 

The more I listened to Kang Kiyeon, the more bewildered I became.

 

It seemed I needed to do something about my dark circles as soon as possible.