Cat on Water

Chapter 21

Yoruichi caught up to the pirates almost instantly, as they were quite slow. She found them bent over one of the fallen trees, the woman, Laurel sitting on top of the cleanly sheared stump, with the large man, Kai, reaching out to rub his fingers over the rings showing.

“Hmm.” He said quietly to himself, “It looks like a clean cut. Someone with a sword must have done this.” He looked up at Laurel, who was looking behind him. “We are on the right track, lets go further in. They have to be here somewhere.”

Yoruichi silently jumped up behind Laurel, crouching on the stump behind Laurel. The stump was big enough and tall enough that Kai couldn’t see Yoruichi from the ground, so when Laurel moved to get up and jump down, she casually said, “You know, ya might be searching for a while if you go that way. But what do I know, it’s not like I’m the only other person here.”

Yoruichi didn’t so much as twitch when Laurel kept off the stump screaming, falling right on top of Kai’s head. Both of them tumbled to the ground, Laurel still screaming, and Kai grunting at the woman who just landed on his face.

She waited patiently as the two scrambled to their feet, as she crouched above their heads. When they had gotten up and pulled their weapons, Yoruichi smiled down at them. “Well, welcome back to the land of the living you two! Have a nice tumble? I hear it works better with an actual bed to land in.”

Laurel, who was now hiding partly behind the large man, cried, a bit fearfully, “who-who are you? When did you get here?” Kai nodded slightly in agreement, the only noise coming from him a slight growling sound.

Yoruichi chuckled lightly, hopping over to the edge of the stump and stepping off the edge, letting her body fall to the forest floor. She landed without a sound in front of the two pirates, something they obviously noticed, as the had gotten even more guarded. She just smiled at them kindly, and said slowly, “Weeellllll, you were looking for me, weren’t you? You should know the answer already.”

That gave the two pause. Laurel stepped out from behind Kai after a moment, looking pretty angry. “This was you!!?” She cried, flailing her arms around. She stepped forward in a threatening way, Kai following her when Yoruichi didn’t respond. “WELL!? WAS IT?”

Yoruichi put a bit of a confused face on, and asked, “I gotta know, are you guys seriously that mad about trees?” She drawled sarcastically. That got a squawk of indignation from Laurel, and another growl from Kai.  

Laurel, who got fed up with her questions not being answered, decided to just make the woman in front of her talk, forcefully. She whispered to Kai in front of her, “Distract her for a moment, so I can get set up.”

Yoruichi heard all of this, and decided to end this as quick as possible. She flash stepped between the two pirates, and appeared back in her original position almost instantly, now holding both of Kai’s clubs, and a bag that Laurel had at her side.

Completely ignoring the stunned silence coming from the two pirates, she threw the clubs over her head, causing the dense woods to thud against the ground behind her, and started digging through the bag.

“Worthless, worthless, somewhat interesting….. again, worthless.” She muttered, somewhat glaring down at the satchel. She paused in her search, and looked up at Laurel, who had a face of complete shock and horror on her face. “Why do you only have plants in here? Is that all you carry on you?”  She went back to digging into the bag, frowning more and more until she stumbled on something that bit her hand. “Ow! Fuck!” She drew her hand out, quick as lightning, before shaking it like mad trying to get the plant that decided to clamp down.

“WHY THE FUCK IS CABBAGE TRYING TO EAT ME!?” She yelled, which shattered the shocked silence the two held. However, before anything else could happen, a massive explosion was heard, making the ground vibrate and a mushroom cloud made of flames to appear in the sky.

Everyone froze, turning woodenly to look in the direction of the explosion.

“Ca-ca-CAPTIAN!!!!” The two pirates yelled in unison, running off to the direction of the explosion with no hesitation.

Yoruichi just stood there dumbfounded, her hands limply hanging at her sides, one with a cabbage that had teeth gnawing on her hand, and the other dumping even more cabbage on the ground.

“Uhhh.” She called, “won’t you need this?” She held up the bag, now mostly empty with cabbage, which was now trying to munch on her legs. When the two didn’t turn around and kept running, she just sighed heavily, her head looking down at the cabbage. “And I thought today couldn’t get weirder after seeing a tree walking around.”

Yoruichi started punting cabbage away from her, causing most of them to explode on impact from her powerful kicks.

Once she was done executing vegetation, she decided to head in the direction of the explosion. A few moments later, she found the two pirates along with the rest of their crew strewn about the sand, along with more people she had never seen before.

She could also see two ships out in the water. The first was the ship she had seen the first group come in on, but it was more splinters than actual boat. ‘Huh…. Looks like that’s the explosion.’ Yoruichi though while examining the next ship.

It was decently large, and had black sails except for the uppermost sail on the main mast, up near the crow's nest. That one was white with black block lettering, which spelled out SPADE.

The front most sail had a skull and crossbones, with a red droplet shape as a backdrop. The figurehead was some sort of animal, though it was too vague to figure out exactly what it was, though it looked like a pig or a horse. It had a flame motif as a backdrop, completely contrasting the rest of the ship.

She sat and watched what was happening, which she assumed was some sort of dispute between pirates. She sat in the treeline, watching the confrontation.

One of the men from the second group stood forward. He was shirtless, with an orange cowboy hat on his head, and red bead necklaces hanging from his neck. He was fairly muscular, though nowhere near the likes of Garp or Akainu. He had black knee length shorts on with a matching orange belt. He had black combat boots on, completing his ‘bad boy’ look.

When he stepped forward, Yoruichi could see most of the first crew cowering at the sight of him. He called out to the other captain, saying “y’all aren’t so big now, are ya? Not when someone actually fights back.” The rest of his crew started shouting at the other crew, who most of which were pretty injured, probably from the explosion.

The treeman stepped forward in front of his crew, in a bid to protect them from the hostile enemies. He had his cutlass drawn, though it was pointed at the ground. “I am Captain Arborius of the Nature pirates. Who are you and what quarrel do you have with us?”

There was a moment of silence, before the other pirate crew started laughing hysterically. The shirtless man doubled over, laughing so hard he couldn’t stand straight. Yoruichi, and most of the Nature Pirates crew just stared at them, confused as to what they were laughing at.

“HAHAhahahha—haha-OH man… Hehehe. That’s a good one.” The shirtless man said, wiping his brow as he stood back up. “Phew. Haven’t had that good of a laugh in a long while.”

He pointed his thumb back at himself, and grinned impishly. “I’m Portgas D. Ace. The man who’s gonna be king of the pirates. And you idiots…” He trailed off, as he started walking closer to them, step by step.

He crossed the sand, Yoruichi watching with mild interest from what he said. ‘Ace…. Hmm, wonder if there’s any relation to Luffy’s big brother.’ She pondered for a moment. She stopped thinking about who he was related to as she watched the man stop right in front of the other captain, Arborius. He got very close to him, even though the tree man was taller by almost a head than the other captain.

“You guys…” Ace poked the man in the chest, “You decided it was a great idea to try and massacre the village of one of my crewmates. And I want to know why.” He growled out, his face hardening in anger. His crewmates behind him started shouting their agreement.

The tiny man, Thistle, if Yoruichi remembered correctly, chirped up. “They were cutting down trees! Heretics, the lot of them! Nature is sacred, it must be taken care of, not destroyed!” he cried, standing up from where he lay injured on the ground behind his captain.

He stalked over to stand next to his captain, the burns on his body still looking quite painful. He scowled up at Ace, a burn on his face crinkling horridly. “You think we are afraid of you, Portgas? Just because you’re called the ‘super rookie’, you think you can do whatever you want?”

Ace just smirked at the tiny man, and said “I don’t think anything. But what I know, is that you can’t do anything to stop me.” He turned around to face his crew members, his hands raised up like he was leading a crowd of spectators on.

Thistle growled, reaching for his weapon. He was stopped by his captain putting a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to calm him down.

“Calm yourself, Thistle.” Arborius rumbled, pulling the small man behind him again. “You speak out of turn.” Focusing his Gaze on Ace, he lowered his hand off of Thistle’s shoulder and onto his cutlas’ hilt.

“Those…. Villagers…... committed genocide on something I swore to protect.” He stated, a curl to his wooden lip showing exactly what he thought of them.

Ace and Arborius stared at each other for a few moments, tension in the air rising rapidly. It was only broken by the stumbling of two people sprinting out of the tree line.

Yoruichi smirked, ‘oh, this should be good.’ She thought pensively, leaning forward in anticipation of the utter shitshow that was about to go down.

“Ca-Ca-Captain!!! Oh thank the spirits, you’re safe. We got a problem!!!” cried Laurel, who had an expression of utter desolation on her face, with tears all over her face. Kai was not far behind, his own expression locked into one of stony worry.

Arborius broke his little staring contest with Ace to look at his crew members. Ace just snorted, crossed his arms, and pouted like a child that had just lost his favorite toy.

“What is it, Laurel? I thought I sent you to find the destroyer of the forest.” Arborius ground out.

Laurel stopped in front of her captain and leaned down to put her hands on her knees, panting in exhaustion.

“Haah. Haah. Yeah. Haah. We found ‘em. Er, her. She is strong though. Scary strong. She… Haah. Took our weapons before we could even blink.” Laurel panted, gasping in air like it was her only lifeline.

Kai was breathing hard too, though not as bad as Laurel. ‘Must be in better shape…’ Yoruichi thought.

The large man grumbled, almost low enough to not be heard, “Fast too….”

Arborius frowned, now fully turning to his exhausted crew members. “Fast….” He looked over at the tree line, eyes scanning over the trees for someone. He paused for a moment on Yoruichi’s position, which caused her eyebrows to rise in surprise.

‘He can see me?’ she thought, slightly worried. ‘Wait, no…’ she narrowed her eyes at him. She shifted a little bit to another branch of the tree she was sitting in, which he did not appear to notice.

Before she could do anything else, the tree she was standing on started moving. Yoruichi immediately vacated the tree she was perched on to another one. She was slightly less surprised when that tree started moving as soon as her feet touched it. The branches started curling in toward her, almost like vines.

Yoruichi saw this and immediately flash stepped out of the trees, figuring that any tree she touched would probably attack her. The issue was that the only nearby place with no trees was the beach currently covered with pirates.

She blurred into place onto the beach, her feet barely disturbing the sand. She awkwardly waved her hand, saying, “Uh, hey there. Dunno what the trees were doing, or the rest of you for that matter, but if you don’t mind, I am going to just leave.” She smiled slightly, but before she did anything, she heard loud laughing coming from one of the sides.

She glanced over at Ace, who was currently bowled over laughing his ass off once again.

“Bahahaha You-You were worried about this pipsqueak? What did she do to your precious trees? Snap a branch? Steal a leaf? Ahahaha!” Ace cried in between fits of laughter and gasps for air.

Yoruichi’s eye twitched.

A moment later, she appeared behind Ace, karate chopping down at his exposed neck. She was completely unprepared for what happened next, though. Her hand went right through the man’s neck, scorching her on it’s way through. “Ow, fuck!” Yoruichi yelped, sharply pulling her hand back, causing it to clip the side of Ace’s neck on the way back.

She spent the next few moments waving her hand around, grumbling in pain as Ace literally fell on the ground laughing even more.

Ace’s crew were also laughing their heads off, and one of them shouted out, “Don’t ya know who he is? He can’t be hurt! He’s made of fire! That’s why he’s called Fire Fist Ace! Hahaha”

Yoruichi’s face scrunched up in annoyance. ‘Ugh, he’s a logia fruit guy, isn’t he. Like the admirals. Still haven’t figured out how to get the devil fruit aspect of Haki working. This went from entertaining to annoying real quick.’  She grumbled to herself.

She stepped closer to the pirate on the ground, sending an angry kick at his head. Ace didn’t even stop for a moment in his laughing fit as her foot went right through his head.

“When I figure out how to hit you I’m gonna hit you so hard you’ll see your grandparents buddy.” She ground out slowly. She ignored the chortling of her own spirit in the back of her mind as she turned away from the laughing pirates.

She turned to the ‘Nature Pirates’ them a glare that would make Ol’ man Yama proud, causing some of the injured pirates to shiver in fear. Her spiritual pressure started leaking out a tiny bit, causing a suffocating feeling in their minds. She put her hands together and cracked her knuckles, ignoring the cackling behind her.

“You wanted to find me, didn’t you?” She growled, a catlike hissing showing itself in her voice. “I’d be inclined to hear what you want to say, but after that” she pointed with a thumb over her shoulder back at Ace, who had now sat up from his spot on the ground, watching the interaction happening in front of him with barely concealed interest. “I am in a much worse mood.”

She walked slowly toward the pirates, stopping in front of Arborius and his officers. Crossing her arms over her chest, she glared up at the tall, wooden man, who stared back with an impassive face. ‘Why the fuck is everyone so tall here? Even the short ones are calling me pipsqueak.’ She bemoaned, definitely ignoring the ‘Cant help what you are.’ In the back of her head.

Focusing back on the wooden man in front of her, she asked, “What was it that you wanted from me? Something about trees?”

Arborius looked at her impassively, his much shorter companion next to him outright glaring more fire than Ace had at her, and the last two, particularly Laurel, shivering when she glanced at them.

He finally responded after a few more moments, saying in a gravelly tone, “You have committed sacrilege. This was an island under our protection, and you massacred almost have the population. For that…..” The hand that was on his sword gripped the hilt fully, pulling it from its sheath. It was a completely wooden blade, a wood that was almost black making up the entirety of the blade. Yoruichi’s sensitive nose could smell that black was not the natural color of the wood. Not even close.

Arborius pointed the blade at her, and said, “You must be punished.” The rest of the Nature pirates growled in anger, realizing that the culprit of their search was in front of them. Many of them, even the injured ones, stood up and grabbed their weapons. Thistle had taken many steps backward, his blow darts already out and ready to be used.

Yoruichi was nonplussed, merely raising an eyebrow at the aggression. “Seriously? Punished? I bet you say that to a lot of people, if your blade is anything to go by.” she said casually. This caused the snickering behind her to die out.

Uhh, pips- I mean, miss?” Ace called out a bit tentatively, “What do you mean by the color of his blade? It’s just a black blade. I’ve seen many weirder things than that.”

Yoruichi glanced over her shoulder at the pirates behind her. She spotted what looked like a lynx, not unlike Komamura, the captain of the 7^th division. “Hey, you. Linx guy. Can’t you smell it?”

“Huh? Smell what?” Ace asked confused, turning to look at his crew mate. “Kotatsu, what is she talkin about?”

The Lynx, Kotatsu, was too busy sniffing the air to respond to his Captain. After a few moments, he paled dramatically. Well as much as a cat man covered in fur can pale.

“Oh dear. That is horrible.” The Lynx muttered to himself, before turning his increasingly horrified eyes toward his captain. “It’s blood, Captain. The sword is soaked in it.”

Ace frowned, turning to face the Wooden captain once more. He said nothing, just stared at the man. Yoruichi did the same, her eyes scanning those behind Arborius with a critical eye.

‘Most are injured in some manner, mostly burns. Most likely from Ace. He was probably what set off that explosion. Maybe the gunpowder storage was hit? I know Bogard said no fire was allowed in there for the same reason.’ She glanced over to the officer beside Arborius. ‘Nonissues, both of them. The woman, Laurel is liable to shit herself as soon as something happens with how much she’s shaking, and the big guy, Kai, might be strong but he doesn’t have any weapons.’ She critically examined each and every member of his crew, knowing a fight was most likely inevitable.

Almost as soon as she finished, she felt something pierce through both of her shoes on both feet, and she instantly flash-stepped off of the spot she was on, stopping only a few feet to her left, closer to the shore. She almost immediately had to vacate the area again, for the same reason as the tree she was in before, as she glanced to where she came from and saw roots of some kind piercing out of the sand. She immediately went as close to the water as possible without standing in it. Looking back at Arborius, she could see that his right foot had started growing into the ground, a very subtle thing only able to be seen from the side as It still kept the shape of his boots, or feet, or whatever his legs were. ‘Plant man, figures. Looks like a tree, walks like a tree, talks like a tree, must be a tree.’

She frowned and said, annoyed, “Really now? Was that necessary? I was all nice too. Tell ya what, Ill give you one more chance, why don’t you make like a tree…..” Yoruichi raised her right hand and did a dismissive flick of her fingers, “And leave.”

That got a crack out of the wooden face of Arborius. It actually cracked open, his face opening like someone just split the bark of a tree open by folding it in half, with his cheeks crunching upward and his mouth forming a gnarled grimace. “I. Hate. TREE JOKES!” Arborius shouted, his gravelly voice bouncing off the ocean and forest.

There was a moment of stunned silence from everyone, Yoruichi included, before Ace’s crew started their laughter up again. They didn’t laugh for long though, as Arborius pointed his sword at them, and said, “Attack!” causing them to be set upon by the rest of his crew.

Arborius himself started stalking toward the water, growing taller and more treelike as he went. He grew to 12 feet tall, almost double his original height, and looked more like an ent than an actual man.

“It is time to pay for your sins, human.” He growled, his voice sounding more like it was echoing inside the tree than actually the tree itself.

Yoruichi stared up at him, an impressed frown on her face. “Huh. Didn’t know he could do that.” She aborted her thoughts as she had to dive to the side to avoid the now much larger cutlass as it smashed down where she was located a moment ago.

The following impact caused her to stumble momentarily as it actually shook the ground, which she then had to dodge even more roots as they shot out of the ground with a *pfft* of sand flying into the air.

She flash-stepped out of the way of another root attack, headed to the ocean facing side of Arborius. She flung her leg out in a wide kick, earning a crack from the arm she was aiming for. Said arm immediately fell down onto the sand, looking like something had just crushed the end of the limb.

Arborius himself stumbled a step, his right foot still putting out roots which kept him anchored to the ground. He regained his footing, frowning down at the lost limb. He extended what was left of his left arm toward the rest of it on the ground, and roots shot out and picked it up, and brought it back into contact with the rest of the arm.

He rolled his shoulder, turning to face Yoruichi who had landed right on the waterline, the waves lapping at her feet. The wind had started picking up slightly, causing her scarf to blow slowly in the wind, along with much of the sand that had been kicked up.

She was currently eyeing the arm she had just smashed, now even more annoyed. ‘What the hell am I supposed to do with that? Smash him into literal splinters? Maybe he wont be able to pull himself back together then.’ She complained, mostly to herself, though Rain was chortling along in the back of her mind at her misfortune.

Usually hollows did one of two things on impact with her kicks. One, turned into a bloody mist almost immediately, or two, got smashed hard enough they weren’t going to get back up.

She pouted childishly glaring at the tree man, who was raising his cutlass behind his head, aiming to cut her in half. “Stupid devil fruits, One is rubber, one is fire, and now it’s a goddamn tree.” She mumbled, absentmindedly flipping over the sword that came flying parallel to the ground.

‘Wait.’ Yoruichi looked over at Ace and his crew, watching the man punch anyone who came near him with flame covered fists. She could see many of the Nature pirates trying desperately to put the fires out, as most of their weapons, and clothes caught fire from being even close to Ace’s hands. ‘Fire. They’re trees. Just set them on fire.’ She looked back at the Entaborius standing in front of her, his arm outstretched.

“Eh. I’ll try that later if this doesn’t work. Shunko.” she said, holding a closed fist out toward her much larger opponent. 

She didn’t move, even as Arborius made his move once more. With a loud roar, Arborius charged forward like a sumo wrestler intent on completely bowling over his opponent. He did not get very far, as Yoruichi made a slight punching motion to the air in his direction, and a concussive blast covered in lightning-like energy arcs roiled over the sand at an insane speed.

Arborius only had a moment to widen his eyes as the attack came at him, his own momentum and large body working against him.

Boom. Arborius took the blow directly to the center of his chest, his own momentum making the hit that much harder. Everyone stopped their fighting for a few shocked moments as they turned toward the massive man who was now kneeling on the ground with a giant hole in his chest.

There were slight scorch marks around the edges of the wound, mainly from the lightning aspect of Yoruichi’s attack.

The dust kicked up from the shockwave started settling, allowing for the rest of the pirates to get a good look at what had just happened. Yoruichi herself, however, was just frowning in contemplation.

‘Hmm. That did less damage than I thought.’ She examined the tree man in front of her with unbridled curiosity. Yoruichi pensively reached out with her spiritual senses to poke at the energy of the man’s devil fruit.

Looking at the energy inside the man’s body, much like she did with Luffy, she could see that most of the energy was still completely fine. Her attack had done nothing much to him, much like she expected it would do next to nothing to Ace, besides make him flicker a small bit.

‘But, there is something else…...’ She narrowed her eyes, before flash-stepping next to the kneeling man and kicking the forward leg with a powerful side kick, completely crushing the limb, her Shunko causing more damage to the leg than she had earlier to his arm.

Arborius, completely unstable with his footing, er, foot-ing, tumbled to the ground, his left arm reaching out toward the ground to catch his fall.

Snapped out of his stupefaction, Arborius turned his head toward the petite woman in front of him. “You…… What did you do to me? “His right arm that held his cutlass dropped the weapon onto the sand, as he reached out toward the hole in his chest. When his hands got close enough, he extended them much like he had with his roots.

When his fingers touched the edges of the wound, he jerked back like he was shocked. The tip of the root turned back into his finger, falling limply like his hand was no longer functional.

After a moment or two, he was able to regain the functionality of his hand, his finger twitching like it was asleep and had just woken up.

Yoruichi had an impressed frown on her face. ‘Huh. Was wondering what that aspect would do.’ She thought, slightly proud of herself. She had used her new and ‘improved Shunko, the one she had learned back in Shimotsuki Village. Normally she would have to spin the Kido within her Shunko to counteract any soul energy being used, but with her doing it inside her body automatically, it seems like she didn’t have to do it manually anymore.

Yoruichi’s face scrunched up a moment later. She was focused on the hole in Arborius’s chest, which had started to grow little tiny roots inside the wound. They stretched across the gap, slowly reaching for the other side of the wound, intent on stitching it back together. Eventually, it looked like Arborius’s power was back to normal, being able to regenerate from attacks.

“Well, that’s just dumb.” Yoruichi deadpanned, “Did that actually hurt him?” she moaned.

Before she did anything else, Arborius’s leg started reaching out for his lost limb, like it did with his arm. She was not going to let him just completely regenerate like that. However, it seemed like she was not the only one to have those thoughts, as someone appeared with a blur that looked suspiciously like the move Garp, and other marines used to move around behind Arborius’s head.

“Fire Fist!” Ace cried as his arm reeled back, coating itself in fire. Ace threw his punch, aiming directly for the back of Arborius’ head. He hit dead on, engulfing the tree man’s head and most of this upper torso in flames.

Yoruichi had the lucky opportunity to be directly in the line of fire, and she had to sidestep the column of flames that came pouring past her by inches, the heat singing the edges of her scarf as it flew by.

The roar of the inferno was loud enough Yoruichi had to turn off the sound input to her ears with a little Kaido, so she could still hear once it was over.

Everyone on the beach watched in horrified fascination as the lower body of Arborius fell to the ground with a dull thud, kicking up sand with the impact. He no longer had a head, and most of his upper body looked like the end-of-life charcoal that can be found in a fire, that would crumble at a single touch.

“CAPPPTTAIINNNNN!!!!!” Screamed the Nature pirate’s crew, the officers falling to their knees in despair, tears in their eyes. Some of the other pirates, probably the grunts, decided that was time to leave, and they turned and sprinted into the forest.

Ace landed on the ground, dusting his palms of proverbial dirt. “Well, that was easier than I thought.” He said, glancing around him. He spied Yoruichi standing next to the body of the fallen Arborius, where his head would have been almost reaching her feet.

He smiled, a bright, charming smile, and walked over to Yoruichi. When he got close enough to be within chatting distance, he said, “That was a nice show you put on. Thanks for the help, although we didn’t really need it.”

Yoruichi just crossed her arms and glared at the taller young man, and asked sarcastically, “Oh, and what would you have done if I wasn’t here, torch the entire island?”

Ace looked a bit sheepish at that. “Uhh, yeah, that’s usually the plan.” He mumbled, looking down at the sand, before looking back up again and smiling once more.

“I’m Ace. Fire Fist Ace. Don’t think we’ve met.” he said, sticking his hand out for a handshake.

Yoruichi just raised an eyebrow in annoyance. “Yes,” she drawled, “You made that very clear when you were laughing at me earlier.”

“Hey!” came the indignant reply. “Its not my fault you’re a pipsqueak!”

He was immediately silenced from any further talking by a fist through the face.

“Stop calling me that!” Yoruichi shouted, as her hand went right through Ace’s face coming out the back of his head. Ace’s crew members started looking at them, thinking another fight was about to happen.

They had been rounding up the Nature pirate’s members while Ace and Yoruichi were talking. Once Yoruichi pulled her hand back out of Ace’s face, he just stared at her with a deadpan expression for a few seconds, before shrugging and turning around.

“So, what do you want to do with them?” he asked, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye. Yoruichi just raised an eyebrow at him. “This is your mess, why are you asking me?” she retorted angrily.

Ace turned toward her slightly, and raised his hands, palms forward. “Hey, hey, hey. I just thought since they seemed to want something from you that you’d want to get some revenge or something.” he said placatingly.

Yoruichi snorted. “Suuureee. Like they could have actually done something. You could defeat all of them on your own, and I am sure I could beat you.” She said, before walking away in the direction of her things on the other side of the island.

Ace started indignantly. “I highly doubt that, pipsqueak! You couldn’t even take on Ole Tree-Fac-Urk” He cried, until he took a step to follow her. When he did, he face planted into the sand getting a mouthful in his still open mouth.

“Urk pleaegh. Ugh…” Ace groaned. “Disgusting. I don’t want to be like that croc o freak with sand getting everywhere, man. The hell did she do to me?” he looked down at his feet, where he could feel something pinning his shoes to the ground.

He couldn’t see anything, however. After staring at his feet trying to find out what was pinning him, he reached down to his left boot and jerked his hand back when he touched something smooth and hard.

Once he touched it, some sort of illusion disappeared, and he could see the yellow triangles piercing into the side of his boots and into the ground.

“Yo, what the fuck did she do to me?” he cried, drawing the attention of his crew once more. “She ruined my boots goddamnit! Now there’s holes in them!”

His first mate, Masked Deuce walked over and said, slightly hesitantly, “Uh, Boss? I don’t think the shoes were the only thing she messed with.”

This caused Ace to look at him uncomprehendingly. After a moment, Deuce just pointed to his head.

Ace froze.

Slightly trembling, he reached up to take his beloved hat off his head. As soon as his hands touched the hat itself, he could tell something was wrong. Very wrong. Taking it off, he pulled it in front of his eyes, and he almost died right then and there.

Instead of his nice, cool, awesome orange felt cowboy hat, he held something that looked functionally the same, but was some hard, but slightly bendy and unnaturally smooth material.

But that wasn’t the worst part. The worst part, in Ace’s opinion, was that the hat was now hot pink.

Ace sat on the ground, his entire body trembling as he stared at his precious hat. After a moment, he took a deep breath, and screamed, “I’M GONNA KILL YOUUUU!” before he tossed his hat aside, reached down and tore off his boots, and sprinted off in the direction Yoruichi had gone.

 

 

Yoruichi was whistling a little tune as she reached her little campsite on the other side of the island.

‘Hmm.’ She paused for a moment. ‘I wonder how long it will take him to realize I replaced his hat?’ she pondered, reaching up and rubbing the brim of her new cowboy hat she had replaced with a gag gift Kisuke had left in her satchel.

It had taken some sleight of hand, and a copious amount of Bakudo #26, Kyokko, but she was able to steal the annoying brat’s hat.

She had just sat down on the log she had repurposed as a chair when her head jerked up and she turned to look in the direction of Ace’s Spade Pirates.

‘That would be right about now, I’m guessing.’ She giggled maliciously in her own mind, causing Rain to huff in his own annoyance.

‘Could you be any more irritating?’ he asked rhetorically.

Yoruichi outright laughed. “Hahaha, you know I can, buddy. But you’d never get bored enough to get rid of me, so I guess you’re stuck with me.”

Rain just huffed again, sinking back into Yoruichi’s mindscape.

A few minutes of sitting down later, Yoruichi suddenly pushed off the ground, backflipping over her log-chair, pushing Ace’s head down into the spot she just vacated. There was a dull crack as Ace’s face smashed into the log, which caused Ace to curl up on the ground holding his nose.

Yoruichi landed on the ground behind him, hands placed on her hips. “Seriously?” she asked, “You’re just going to take some shots at me while my back is turned? You’re almost as bad as Luffy.”

Ace, who had finally gotten up into a sitting position from his fetal position on the ground, groaned out, “What the hell was that-Wait. Did you say Luffy?” He looked up at Yoruichi with a lot of shock and a little bit of hope in his eyes.

He quickly got to his feet, and rushed over to Yoruichi, grabbing her by the shoulders. “You’ve met Luffy? Where? He can’t be on the grand line, he already promised to leave in a year. How did you meet him? Where? Why?” he rambled, his questions slightly overwhelming the petite woman.

She quickly pushed him away, forcefully breaking his grip on her shoulders. “All right, all right, jeez, calm down. I met him in the East Blue, and unless he found himself on a ship headed here anyways, I highly doubt he has the brain power to make his way here on his own.” She said, continually pushing the energetic young man away.

He finally calmed down enough to stand still, though the grin on his face was large enough to carve it in half.

“So,” Ace said, as he turned to sit on the log which still had blood from his still bloody nose on it, “How did someone of your caliber meet someone like my brother.”

Yoruichi just sighed and grabbed another log that she had diced up the day prior and sat on that as well.

She looked at him, and knowing exactly what was going to happen, she said calmly, “I met him through your grandfather.”

She was 100% percent right in her prediction as Ace squeaked a bit, and almost jumped a few feet in the air. “Wai-wait-wait-wait. You aren’t a Marine, are you?” Ace asked hesitantly.

Yoruichi threw back her head and laughed. “Hahaha, no, I’m not a marine. Have met them though.” She paused for a moment, then grinned. “Let me tell you, Sengoku’s hair is a real nice place for a nap.”

Ace sat back down on his log, patting the dirt off his pants, and when she said that, he just froze, his jaw dropping open in shock. “HUUUH? You’ve slept in the fleet admiral’s hair?” he cried, “How the hell are you not dead already?”

Yoruichi chuckled, and replied a bit evasively, “Wellllll, I kind of left almost immediately after that, and that’s how I ended up here. Hitched a ride with a dude named Mihawk. He really did not like the amount of questions I kept asking about his sword.” She paused for a moment, putting a finger to her chin. “Or is it my sword? It is my families’, and I am the former clan head.” In the end she just shrugged, turning her attention back to Ace.

He was currently massaging his temples, a bit in shock at the big names thrown about. “So, let me get this straight.” He said finally, “You slept in Sengoku’s hair, then chose to leave with Mihawk while annoying him so much he dumped you on a deserted island in the middle of the grand line.” He looked up at Yoruichi for confirmation.

She nodded her head shamelessly, and said proudly, “Yep. That was all after I got Garp to smuggle me into the meeting, too.”

Ace facepalmed.

“Of course he would do that, as much as he shouts about the Marines, he has no respect for the rules.” Ace mumbled, more to himself than anything.

Yoruichi snorted, before deadpanning, “If Garp even knew what the word rules meant he would be the fleet admiral.”

“Hah!” Ace laughed for a moment, before suddenly getting a bit serious. “So, you are stuck here, yeah?” he asked a bit pointedly.

Yoruichi shrugged again, looking out into the water. “I wouldn’t say stuck here, but running to a new island when I don’t even know where I am would be way to much effort.” She smiled a bit, though not happily, more like annoyed.

Ace laughed again, and said, “Yeah the grand line isn’t known for its nice weather.” He stopped smiling and started smirking at Yoruichi. “So, if you want off this island, what do you say to joining my crew? We could use someone like you, you seem pretty tough. We got big plans, like fighting Whitebeard in a few months.” He finished, still smirking at Yoruichi like he just knew she would accept his offer.

Yoruichi turned to look back at him, the look on her face like the one your aunt gives you when you say you are going to be the richest person in the world. “As I said to Luffy, no.” she said patronizingly, “And I wish you some real good luck in fighting Whitebeard. If he’s anywhere near as strong as Garp, you are gonna need it.”

Ace pouted, and said indignantly “Hey! We will beat him. I’m invincible with the Mera – Mera fruit.” He stood up and started flexing like he was in a body building competition. “Do you see this bod? I worked really hard to get in shape for this, there’s no way I’m gonna loose!”

Yoruichi chuckled and shook her head in slight disbelief. ‘This kid has an ego larger than Sengoku’s afro. He is so dead when he fights Whitebeard.’ She thought to herself.

She focused on the hothead showing off in front of her, and said calmly, “Even though I won’t join your crew, I wouldn’t say no to a lift to an Island. Unless you have your grandpa on speed dial with those snail phones of yours.”

Ace paused in his routine mid flex to look perplexed at Yoruichi. “Why would I have that crazy bastard on my Mushi. Hed just use it to track my ass down and make me a marine.” He said confused.

Yoruichi shrugged once more and stood up from her log. “Eh, not my problem. Give me a lift then?” she asked.

Ace stopped flexing and jumped up and down. “Yes, yes! We can share stories about my stupid brother, I can give you some ammo on Garp too, since you seem to know him.” he said excitedly. He looked around a bit, before looking along the coast. “Ah, just on time. Here comes my ship. The Piece of Spadile.”

 Yoruichi said nothing, and just followed the energetic young man to the shoreline, lost in her own thoughts. ‘The monkey family sure is energetic.’ She thought to herself, ‘wonder if it’s genetic.’ She was so lost in thought that she almost tripped over the now prone body of Ace, who was lying face first in the sand, snoring away like he was deep in sleep.

She stared dumfounded down at the pirate laying in the sand, long enough for the Spadile to pull up and anchor near them.

“Oi!” someone called, making Yoruichi look up. “Did he pass out on ya?”

She saw the person yelling at her hip down from the rails of the ship, and land smoothly on the sand. He walked up to her quickly, reached down and threw Ace over his shoulder.

“He’s got narcolepsy.” The man said, turning halfway to look at her. “I’m Deuce, by the way. Don’t think we met during the fight earlier.” He turned to carry Ace over to his ship, headed to the ramp that the rest of the crew put down in preparation for them to come back up.

Yoruichi looked at Deuce, seeing that this was apparently a normal thing to happen. “I’m Yoruichi. He offered me a ride to civilization, then that happened. Narcolepsy you said?” Yoruichi said quietly as she quickly got into step with the man.

He nodded slowly, and replied, “Yeah, something he got from his mother. Kind of expected this to happen to be honest, he usually drops after a fight like that.” He paused, shaking his head and mumbled, “At least it wasn’t in his food again.”

Yoruichi chuckled lightly as they arrived to the ramp. They said nothing else as they walked up, even as Ace woke up from his sleep with a start, almost falling off Deuce’s shoulder.

Yoruichi thought to herself, ‘Ah, never a dull moment with the monkeys’

 

 

A day later, Yoruichi, Ace and the rest of the Spade pirates found themselves at a port town of the country of Lulusia.

Before disembarking, Ace turned to face his crew. “Remember guys, there’s a marine base here. No funny business, or we are going to have to cut this short.” He said, before hopping over the rails leaving everyone to their own devices.

Yoruichi, not really knowing any of the pirates, decided to go off on her own, looking for a place to go after this island. She had considered trying to contact Garp, as she knew he had something he wanted her for besides outright joining the marines, but she did not think after taking a nap in his boss’ hair after getting smuggled into what was definitely a confidential meeting that the Marines wouldn’t be that happy with her.

Yoruichi spent around 20 minutes wandering around the port town, looking for a place to find a map, or a ship off the island.

‘Can't rely on the pirates, even if Ace is Luffy’s brother’ she thought, examining the shops critically. Unbeknownst to her, in the tallest building on the island, the marine communication tower in the base G2, there was a somewhat frantic call going through to Marineford.

“Purururu ca-lick.” Came from one of the secure den-den mushi lines in the tower. “Feet Admiral’s office, what is it?” Came the tired voice of Sengoku himself, sounding like he hasn’t slept in a few days.

The marine communications officer on the other end, who was about to say something, froze at those words. After a moment, he said, “Sir, this is the communications officer from G2 at Lulusia. We got that notice about being on lookout for a small woman with purple hair, wearing a black jumpsuit with an orange jacket. The alert said to call this number if we found her. We spotted her 10 minutes ago wandering around the shopping district of the port town, matching the description exactly.” The officer tried not to stutter as he gave his report.

The face of the snail frowned, before saying, “Good. Make sure she stays there. I’ll be sending someone to get her.” Sengoku ended the call immediately after with a ka-lick from the denden.

The officer wiped his brow, as he had started sweating. “Phew. I was not expecting to have to call the fleet admiral today.” He got up and looked out the window of the tower, looking down at the shopping center nearby. He could still see Yoruichi walking around, curiously looking at the stores. “She’s not a pirate, we know that. Still, I wonder what she did to get the fleet Admiral’s personal attention.”

 

 Back to Yoruichi, she was having no luck finding a place to figure out exactly where she was. Apparently, there were no map stores on the island, and any ship taking passengers required a boatload of beri, the currency of the world government.

‘Goddamn small-town issues’ she thought, frustrated. A few moments of no luck later, she noticed a commotion inside a restaurant with a bunch of people crowding around inside.

‘Hmm, looks interesting. Wonder what’s going on in there.’ She pondered, then heads quickly over to the restaurant. Nudging her way through the crowd, she was almost immediately lost of any entertainment value she might have had when she spotted Ace, lying face down in a soup he was probably eating, with multiple people shaking his body.

She immediately facepalmed, before shoving people out of the way so she could get closer to Ace. When she got there, She grabbed him by the shoulder, pulled him up closer to her face so she could yell in his ear, “Wake up you ingrate!” at the top of her lungs. Which for Yoruichi, was loud enough to deafen small children.

“Baaaahhh!” Ace cried as he shot up with a start, almost falling out of his chair in the process.

He looked around hurriedly, but calmed down immediately once he saw Yoruichi standing above him. He completely ignored the large crowd, and smiled happily at Yoruichi. “Heyyyyy. Glad you could make itt. Wannntt something to eat *brbp*”he slurred, evident drunk off his ass.

Yoruichi just sighed in defeat. “Ughhh. Where’s Deuce?  You need to get out of here before something stupid happens.” She said, glancing around the bar area to see if Deuce had followed his Captain.

She did not see anyone of note, until a long shadow passed over the entryway, and the throng of people parted. The man that walked in was around 10 ft tall, a bit taller than Garp. He was thin, much more so than Garp, Sengoku, Akainu, or most others she has seen at that height.

He had a double breasted, yellow-striped suit with a forest green undershirt and a pink tie. He looked at the end of his prime, with short cropped dark hair and a face starting to wrinkle. He had orange tinted, rounded glasses on the bridge of his nose, and he was looking around the restaurant with a relaxed smile on his face.

Yoruichi looked in his direction as his tall shadow covered her and Ace.

“Ara ara, what’s this?” The man said slowly. “I come all the way out here for you, and I find you shacked up with pirates?” he asked rhetorically.

Yoruichi groaned loudly in her own head. She had missed the most important feature of him. He had a Marine Admiral Jacket on. And since she didn’t recognize him, that meant this must be Borsalino, or Kizaru. The only Admiral left from the previous generation.

‘Why does it have to be the weird one.’ She moaned to Rain, who started laughing loudly.