Esa Promesa

The face, which had been marred with embarrassment, hardened to a chill colder than frost before my eyes, prompting me to instinctively step back. Suddenly, Diver turned to the side.

“Until I grant permission, no one is to enter this floor.”

Before I could even grasp what was happening, Diver entered the room.

Diver, who personally closed the door, strode toward me. Even though I had been by Diver’s side for 15 years, his imposing behavior made me shrink back. The closer Diver approached, the more I retreated, which only caused his expression to grow colder. But I couldn’t help it—I was merely following my instincts!

Meanwhile, I didn’t forget to curse Lasfame.

Judging by Diver’s reaction, it seemed he somehow knew that I had been alone in the room with Lasfame.

I didn’t know how he knew, but given our contract, maybe there was some way he could sense it. In any case, knowing full well that I’d be in trouble, Lasfame had thrown out some nonsense about ‘good luck’ before abandoning me. His irresponsibility burned me up inside.

Good luck with what? He might as well have wished me a good death.

I couldn’t think of any excuse.

I certainly couldn’t boldly say, ‘I tried to escape from you but was caught by Lasfame, who took away my means of escape. We just had a little chat. Oh, and it turns out my only means of escape is this country’s national treasure. Haha!’ That would hurt Diver and put my neck on the line.

“Tei, what did you do with him?”

“We just had a private conversation.”

“A private conversation, huh. If you were only talking, then why did you change your clothes? And so hastily that you couldn’t even button them properly?”

Only then did I take a calm look at my appearance. Diver was right. One of the buttons on my shirt was misaligned, throwing everything out of order.

“Your breathing is rough. Your face is red. What exactly did the two of you do? Hmm?”

Diver smiled. But I knew from experience that this wasn’t a real smile. Every time Diver smiled like that, someone ended up dead. He wouldn’t kill me, of course, but it still wasn’t good for my heart.

“Your Majesty, I believe you’re misunderstanding.”

“Misunderstanding? I’d like you to explain exactly what misunderstanding you think I’m having, Tei.”

“It’s not what Your Majesty is thinking.”

“And what is it that you think I’m thinking?”

A sigh escaped me.

“Your Majesty, you know it’s not that. We simply talked. It was a private matter, so I can’t share the details.”

“Really?”

Diver’s fierce aura had subsided, but suspicion still lingered clearly in his gray eyes. My fingers twitched instinctively, tempted to clutch my head in frustration.

“Yes. And the reason I look like this is because ink got on the clothes I was wearing earlier, so I hurriedly changed. I was about to do it properly after Lasfame left, but since Your Majesty suddenly showed up, I ended up rushing and looking like this.”

It wasn’t entirely a lie. The fact that ink had stained the clothes I wore before preparing to leave for the cradle was true. I shot Diver a reproachful look, boldly blaming him for my improper appearance. The message was clear: ‘It’s partly your fault for bursting in so suddenly and pounding on the door like a madman.’

What servant could greet their king mid-changing without hesitation? Diver seemed to grasp this, as a faintly awkward expression crossed his face.

“…I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.”

Unlike his earlier intensity, Diver now crept toward me cautiously, like a thief. His timid approach made me feel guilty, so I stepped toward him first.

Instantly, the somber expression on his face lit up with brightness. Seeing him like that reminded me of when he was young, and I couldn’t help but smile.

Whenever Diver wronged me in the past, he would act as though nothing had happened, all while nervously gauging my reaction. He’d look so pitiful, startled like a rabbit at my slightest move, that I’d end up forgiving him first. When I did, he’d brighten up just as he did now.

Unthinkingly, I almost reached out to pat his head as I used to but caught myself and pulled my hand back.

A wry smile crept onto my lips. Just as Diver hadn’t entirely outgrown his old habits, I was still far from perfect.

Soon, I would become a ghost in Diver’s world.

Therefore, as I had resolved when preparing to leave this life, I needed to maintain my distance. It was the right thing to do.

Especially to ensure Diver wouldn’t give me his heart any further and to prevent myself from growing more attached and leaving behind regrets. But it was proving to be incredibly difficult.

Would I truly be able to manage this moving forward?

Honestly, I wasn’t confident.

Until just a short while ago, I had been so set on ignoring Diver’s pain and returning to the cradle. Now, having these thoughts felt selfish, but I genuinely hoped Diver wouldn’t be hurt.

Especially not by betrayal from someone he cherished. I knew all too well how deep that wound could cut.

“Shall we head back for now?”

Diver smiled happily at my words, and just like that, the fleeting thought of persuading him to let me stay comfortably in the lodging disappeared.

…Seeing him so happy, maybe I could convince him later?

Even as I wished for Diver not to grow more attached to me, a small, foolish thought crept in there was still time.

Yes, let’s go with that for now. Besides, there was something I needed to press Diver about.

In my earlier shock at his sudden confession, I’d been slow to recall what had led the thorn to seek me out.

Diver had a tendency to run when things didn’t go his way. I’d already learned that well enough during our conversation about Sol Avla. To ensure he couldn’t escape this time, I’d need an inescapable room.

And of course, that room would be Diver’s bedchamber. Thinking of cornering him in the adjacent room where he’d once locked me up and pressing him for answers put me in a much better mood.

*

One day, Diver said something to me.

‘You smile whenever you’re angry.’

When was that? Ah, I remember now. It was during the frenzy of preparing for Diver’s birthday, when the entire kingdom was bustling. He had said it while staring intently at me after I killed the assassins who had overstepped their bounds and dared to target his neck.

At first, I thought Diver had misjudged. But right after, as I turned to call for the attendants to deal with the corpses, I caught a glimpse of my reflection in the mirror. That’s when I realized he was right.

I do smile when I’m angry.

But I wonder if Diver knows—he, too, smiles when he’s angry.

“I have so many regrets about you all.”

Though I thought we were heading straight to the bedchamber, Diver instead took me to the council hall, saying we’d stop by briefly. This was the room where the kingdom’s most central nobles and their subordinate houses’ key representatives gathered.

“To think you dared bring forth such a proposal without even managing proper pruning first. I’m beginning to suspect I’ve overestimated your abilities.”

Diver was smiling. His tone was even brighter than usual. To an outsider, it might have sounded like the king was in a pleasant mood.

However, those of us present, nobles included, had all experienced firsthand what such a tone from Diver often preceded.

Glancing around, I saw that the faces of the noble who had presented the proposal and a few of his supporters had turned so pale they looked ready to collapse on the spot.

What kind of proposal was it.

From my position, seated at the corner away from the center and diagonally across from Diver, I couldn’t see the details of the document.

Considering he had brought me here, I briefly wondered if it had anything to do with me. But that didn’t seem likely.

“No one is answering. Fine. Let’s hear it directly from the person who proposed it. Count Delan, speak up.”

“Y-Your Majesty.”

“Yes, I am your king, Count. That’s why you dared to bring forth such a proposal, along with a signed petition, boldly raising your head over the matter of Sol Avla, isn’t it?”

I suppressed a sigh that nearly escaped me. So, it really was because of me that Diver was targeting a noble now? While I wasn’t particularly close to Count Delan, I knew enough about him to get a general idea of his character. I briefly considered giving Diver a subtle signal that it wasn’t the right time, but he didn’t even glance in my direction.

“T-That’s correct, Your Majesty. I do not understand why we must suddenly repair Sol Avla. Repairs to Sol Avla are currently impossible. Your Majesty is well aware of our budget constraints. This year, five regions have suffered droughts, and the southern provinces were hit by floods, leading to outbreaks of disease. That’s not all. Five trade ships were swept away in a storm, causing severe losses. In such a situation, how can we consider repairing Sol Avla? Had this been a time of war or even a sign of impending conflict, I wouldn’t have submitted such a proposal. But this is not the time, is it?”

Count Delan’s trembling voice filled the hall. It seemed he had decided there was no way to retreat further.