Fate Grand Order: Summoner Of Fun

The group of new friends, Tom, Fou, Kirschtaria, Zeteo and Kadoc sat at a table in the cafeteria along with Mash and a woman with auburn hair that wore an eyepatch, Ophelia Phamrsolone, one of Kirschtaria's 'Friends'

"Um, Sister-in-law, it's nice to meet you." Zeteo said suddenly to Ophelia who's face suddenly turned red at a speed visible to the naked eye and steam began rising from her head.

Even Kirschtaria coughed startled but, he somehow managed to be elegant while coughing too.

"M-me? S-sister-in-law?" Ophelia stuttered as she seemed to have her CPU be overheated.

[.....Is there literal steam coming out of her head? What the hell? ] Aion said deeply wondering if it was truly in a normal world.

"....." All of them stared at the obvious couple except Mash who seemed confused and nodded "Sister-in-law, if he ever bullies you, tell us, Kadoc and I shall teach him a lesson!" Zeteo said as Kadoc nodded with a gentle yet amused smile.

"..... We're not married-" Kirschtaria said as Ophelia looked a little disappointed "-Yet." He finished as her blush returned in full force, her face lighting in a bright smile.

The couple began to smile at each other with gentle and loving eyes as Tom imitated retching in the background with Fou patting Zeteo's and Kadoc's shoulders as they hugged each other with tears in their eyes while Mash looked confused.

_________

".....Aion, how many JP do I have now?" He ask as he laid sprawled across his bed with Tom and Fou as the three were looking at the ceiling lazily.

[.... I'm confused if I should even hand it to you, you traumatized those poor souls ] Aion said as it looked conflicted, Aion was supposed to be a Joy System to bring Joy to the World and remove the regrets of the World but, his User was too terrifying.

"Hand it over or I'll smash you with a hammer." He muttered lazily in reply while Aion snorted

[ Yeah, right. How are you even- AHHH!] Aion was cut off when it suddenly saw a random giant hammer appear infront of it and hit him and then disappeared.

[ How!? What?! Huh?! ] Aion was completely confused and even wondered if he was hallucinating, if it wasn't for the pain he somehow felt that seemed to tell him that it was real.

"Meow?" Tom asked confused what Aion meant while Zeteo also looked confused as Aion fell into self-doubt again "....Were you hallucinating again, um, you should try going to a System Doctor if that exists." Zeteo said concerned about Aion.

[ Was I truly hallucinating? Can I even hallucinate? ] Aion muttered confused and fell into deep self-doubt.

"Hey! Aion! My JP?" Zeteo snapped Aion out of it's confusion [ Oh yeah, you earned 70 JP with that stunt of yours, now you have 130 JP ] Aion informed him, temporarily throwing away it's doubt.

"....You already know what this means, don't you?" Zeteo asked as he sat up seriously and clasped his hand in a praying posture.

"....Oh Holy Goddess of Luck that is merciful and benevolent, please bless me with Luck as I overcome this Ordeal, I, your most Devoted believer Zeteo beseech of thou!" He prayed seriously with Tom and Fou imitating his posture.

"....BEGIN THE GACHA!"

"MEOW!"

"FOU!"

[ HAA!- Wait, why am I joining in?! ]

[ Item and Skill Gacha Commencing! ]

[ Gacha Complete! ]

[ Durable Giant Diamond! (Common) x4]

[ Heal it! Knock it! (Rare) ]

[ Illusionary Demon Horns (Uncommon) ]

[ Magi☆Mari Limited Edition Swimsuit Model Doll 4 (Common) ]

[ Super Delicious Giant Tuna (Common) ]

[ Enchantment Table! (Epic) ]

[ Craft it! (Legendary) ]

".....HELL YEAH!"

[ HOW?! DID THE GODDESS OF LUCK REALLY BLESS YOU?! ]

"Tom, Fou! We can feast tonight!" He completely ignored the others as he lifted the giant tuna fish that was larger than him up in the air as Fou and Tom kneeled next to him.

[ Are you kidding me?! Fish?! That's what you focus on?! ] Aion roared

"Fou! Fou!" Fou countered as Tom and Zeteo nodded

"Exactly, Fou's right, you can't do anything on an empty stomach." Zeteo agreed.

[ HOW DID FOU EVEN HEAR ME DAMN IT?!] Aion roared again as all the three of them shrugged in confusion.

"Anyways, let's check our new loot." He said as he rubbed his hands together.

[ Durable Giant Diamond! ]

[ Rank: Common ]

[ Literally, a Giant Durable Diamond that can survive literal nukes, yep, nuclear level defence Diamonds. Also, it hurts to get hit by this. ]

[ Magi☆Mari Limited Edition Swimsuit Model Doll 4 ]

[ Rank: Common ]

[ Out of the hundreds of millions of Magi☆Mari fans across the Universe, only 50 of these limited edition figurines exist across the multiple realities. Your reality only, somehow has 5 though. ]

"Great! I'll give it to Romani as a Christmas gift." He nodded to himself [....I don't even know why how I have these in the Gacha ] Aion muttered to itself.

[ Illusionary Demon Horns ]

[ Rank: Uncommon ]

[ Literally, Illusionary red demon like horns that appear on your forehead, does nothing else but increase your intimidation by 200% ]

[..... Oddly enough, this suits you ] Aion held back a laugh.

"Hahaha-" Tom laughed exaggerated as he patted his thighs in laughter while bending over "..... I'll reduce your Tuna by half" he said as Tom stopped instantly "Meow Meow! Meow!" Tom praised his genius and magnanimity and how the system was blind to give demon horns to him.

"Good"

[ That's a naked threat! ] Aion said plainly

[ Heal it! Knock it! ]

[ Rank: Rare ]

[ Oh no! Your friend is hurt? Worry not! Hit them and heal them with the 'Heal It! Knock it!' skill, guaranteed to heal any injury ]

[ Cooldown is 5 times per minute though, gotta rest after healing after all ]

[ Enchantment Table! ]

[Rank: Epic]

[ Literally what it say, allows you to enchant or modify any item's property, one item can only be modified or enchanted once a day but, you can enchant/modify an unlimited number of items a day though! ]

[ Special Feature: Can be used as a blunt throwing weapon, returns to owner after hitting target ]

[ Craft it! ]

[Rank: Legendary ]

[ 3 Buckets of Milk, 2 Sugars, 1 Egg and 3 Wheat! ]

[ Literally, Craft It! Allows you to craft things like in Minecraft or if it makes sense! Go forth my child! Build! I mean, Craft!]

[ Special Feature: Allows everything to be used as blunt weapons, causes 200% more pain ]

[ Oh no, what have I unleashed? ] Aion asked in horror.

"HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA-"

"MYAHAHAHA-"

"FOUFOUFOU-"

That day, three maniacal laughs rang out across the whole Chaldea, making many masters shiver in fear.

________

{ Master Candidate 32 POV }

'Hello everyone, It's me Akira, after two days of counselling with the Medical Department, I've gotten better, although I'm still terrified but, I don't scream when I see a pointed stick anymore! I'm on my path to healing!'

"Huh? What's that sound?" Akira asked confused as he heard a faint sound from a Master's room, curious, he saw the door was slightly open and looked in.

"HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA-"

"MYAHAHAHA-"

"FOUFOUFOU-"

A man with devil like red horns and a terrifying smile laughed along with a beast standing on two feet that looked ferocious and a small beast that was also grinning ferociously, all the three monsters eyes shining with madness while glowing red.

"AHHHHH! D-DEVILS!" He yelled terrified as he fell on his back and regretted screaming, the three monsters looked at him with their glowing eyes and smiles as Akira knew no more.

___

Akira was found shivering on a hospital bed while hugging himself.

The Legend Of The Hammer Devil grows