Hidden Myth

I know the thing is somehow tracking me through the ants. Pheromones maybe? How did it know where I lived? But if I can get far enough away, and kill any ants I find, then maybe I can escape the killer.

"Has this guy been bothering you, Lyden?" Jenifer stands, and faces the oncoming horror.

"Lyden Snow. You cannot escape me. Your death has been commanded by the Pillar of Fire." The thing's voice doesn't sound any less scary in the open air than it had in my apartment.

"What the. . . .?" Jennifer says as the thing comes close enough for the monster's mandibles to become visible.

"Get down!" I shout, tackling the large woman out of the way, as the fire ant's mandibles open wide, and flame spurts out. We hit the ground just fine, but the Orange Bubble isn't as lucky. In horror, I watch as flames spread across my faithful vehicle as if it were covered in gasoline.

"Oh, hell no!" Jennifer screams, shoving me off her and standing to face the creature.

"Jennifer, no! You can't—" Before I have a chance to speak further, she reaches into the back of her pants, and pulls out a pistol she has hidden there. Thunder cracks as she fires off a couple rounds into the fire ant's chest. I watch in burgeoning hope as I see the rounds slam into the creature, and pieces of it burst free from the impacts of the two rounds.

The fire ant doesn't even seem to notice. In fact, if anything, the thing begins to laugh.

"What IS that thing?" Jennifer demands, as she pulls me away from the advancing fire ant and fires a couple more shots at it.

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you," I shout over the sound of her pistol firing a couple more rounds.

"Try me," she snarls. "Right now a fire breathing thing is trying to kill us. I might just believe whatever you have to say."

I decide not to point out that it's technically after just me. "Okay, well, it's a man-thing, made up of fire ants."

She only gives me a partially skeptical look, before checking her magazine. "Damn! I only have a few rounds left. And double damn the new laws!" She shoves the magazine back in and then pulls me down behind another car. Flame lances over our heads, but the car blocks it from us. "I need to get to my truck. Do you think you can get to my cart?"

"Your. . . ? I don't think we need food right now. We need to get out of here," I tell her.

"Dammit Lyden, I don't want the food in there. I have a can of Raid in one of the bags. Been trying to fend off some roaches." I can tell she's a bit insulted at my words, but what was I supposed to think?

Raid. Right. . . . "I don't think there is enough Raid in that store to kill that thing." I sound sooo optimistic right now.

"Can you do it?" the large guard presses me.

I glance around the car and see the cart, then the flaming remains of the Orange Bubble on the other side of the fire ant. Dang, that fire burns fast! Can I do it? I'm exhausted and out of energy. I overdid it with my wings and escaping that thing in my apartment. I don't have the strength to even run right now.

I stare into Jennifer's large blue eyes and nod my head. I'll do it, or die trying.

I just wish that latter option wasn't the most likely outcome.

The big chested woman shoves me away, taking off running and firing her last few rounds into TanaVesta's hired thug. "Over here, you hot piece of insect riddled meat," she calls, getting the thing's full attention. "Are you only a one trick man? Can't you do anything else to please a woman?" Even under pressure, she manages to be raunchy. My respect for her increases.

Moving quickly to the other end of the car, I try and sprint for the unguarded cart. So, maybe sprint is too strong of a word, maybe something more like shambled quickly. Anyway, I'm able to reach it without incident, but groan as I see how many plastic bags are in the thing. How am I going to find a single can of Raid in here?

"Lyden," Jennifer screams, and I hear an odd clicking sound, "Any day now. I only have one round in this thing."

I spare a glance at her, and see that she has a double barrel shotgun in her hands, apparently grabbed from the cab of her truck, and I understand her plan. Unfortunately, the fire ant's attention is back to me as well, and it starts running back my way.

Frantically, I start pulling bags out and dumping their contents onto the asphalt. Eggs splatter, and a carton of milk breaks open, but no cans of Raid.

"Lyden. . . ." Jennifer yells a warning at me. Looking up, I see the thing inhaling to fire at me, and I shove the cart and start moving.

Wait, was that it? Frantically I lean into the cart, falling in and start tearing at the spot I thought I saw it. The cart continues to roll.

Yes! I cheer in triumph as I hold it up. Naturally that's the moment that the moving cart hits a curb and sends me tumbling out. I even manage to lose my grip on the can, and watch in horror as it rolls away from me, and under a car.

"Lyden, quit fucking around!" Jennifer screams, but I ignore her as I scramble to my feet just in time to avoid another bolt of searing hot pain. The cart and what contents remained end up well done. If I weren't so terrified for my life at the moment, I'd almost enjoy the smell of cooked food. Hey, I missed dinner, remember?

Catching up to the can, I reach under the black car, scoop it up, and turn to throw it near the monster. My aim is poor as I'm off balance however, and the can flies straight at the fire ant.

"Fuck!" I scream, yelling the worst word I know in my frustration. Can't I get at least a little break?

The thing doesn't even try to dodge, and the can strikes it in the chest. To my surprise, instead of bouncing off, the ants that make up the thing's body pull the can into its torso.

"Jennifer, NOW!" I bellow, and I watch as the things mouth opens to expel fire at me. I know I'm not going to get away from it in time. Everything seems to slow as I watch the heat build up in its throat. I know that I only have a couple seconds left, until I'm a Kentucky Fried Chicken. The thing roars, and then appears to grow larger, its chest expanding out. Is it trying to make me extra crispy with more flame?

Jennifer must have shot the thing with her shotgun, I think, as the monster is suddenly engulfed in a cloud of smoke and fire.

Something doesn't feel right, and it's hard to hear through the loud ringing in my head, but it dawns on me that I'm lying on my back.

And laughing.

I'm alive, I think, and then can't hold it in anymore, and scream, "I'm ALIVE!"

"But you won't be free for long unless you get up and we get out of here." Jennifer leans over me, and I find myself thinking about just how large her breasts are. She's holding her hand out to me, and with a strong grip, she pulls me up. "I hear sirens," she tells me, and suddenly I'm worried again. My apartment is burned up, and after the fires, and the gun shots here, the police are going to want to talk to me.

I let the woman pull me over to her truck, and I get in the passenger side. I wave one last farewell to the remains of the Orange Bubble as we peal out of the parking lot. The flames are dispersing, but I can make out that my car is nothing more than a blackened husk. I can still make out the dent in the top, where it had caught me from my fall earlier in the evening. Thoughts and memories of all the years we'd been together, and even of the time spent under the ocean, flit through my mind as the city zooms by.

At some time, Guard Lansbury puts her shotgun back into the rack in the back window, and I only absently note the two unused shells in her hand.

"What made you think to throw the can into it, instead of by it?" she asks me. "I planned on shooting the can as it got close to the thing, but your plan worked much better. I'm guessing that the internal heat was too much for the can, and it exploded. Do you think it's dead?"

She continues to drone on, and I decide to take a nap.

It feels like I only have enough time to blink, before Jennifer is shaking me awake.

"Wake up, Lyden. If you think I'm carrying your skinny ass into the cabin, think again!"

"Cabin?" I mumble, wiping some spittle from my cheek.

"I thought about taking you back to my place, but I've never let another man in there before. The cabin seemed like a smarter choice anyway," she tells me, and I can only smile and nod. I'm completely exhausted. "It only has one bedroom, and the bathroom is out back, but you can sleep on the couch. You look too tired to tell me much tonight, but I expect a full explanation in the morning."

I stumble more than walk into the cabin and collapse onto the proffered couch. I don't even notice how dark the cabin is.

"No hanky-panky. I'll be locking my door," are the last words I hear before oblivion folds me within its wonderful embrace.