Homestar Saga

The captured Federation fleet floated in New Pixa's farthest asteroid belt. The ships had been repaired and painstakingly placed as close to the mining and manufacturing stations as possible without interfering with operations. It was a smart arrangement, keeping the ships out of range of City 43's anti-tech field and allowing the Peacekeepers to board the ships quickly in case of emergency.

Now that the emergency had arrived, Yvian was once again taken aback at the speed and efficiency of the machines. Individual Peacekeeper units jetpacked to ships, boarded, activated the jumpdrive, and disembarked, all in a matter of seconds. Carrier class vessels took longer, as the units boarded in large groups and launched the fighters they would be using later. In a mere nineteen minutes most of the fleet had been jumped to Vrrl space. Peacekeeper units powered up the fighters and YEET Artillery Barges, waiting for the shields to charge before jumping into battle themselves.

Meanwhile, the Vrrl forces were barely holding on. The Starfang Empire was equal to the Federation in terms of energy weapons and ship design. That didn't change the fact that they were being riddled with holes. Their fleets had sustained massive losses, with only a few thousand human casualties to show for it.

"So where's Scathach going to come up with two hundred million pilots?" Lissa wondered aloud. "He said he'd have them there within an hour."

"Warmaster Sithis will drop them off," Scarrend told her. "Delaying reinforcements a few extra minutes will be a small price for that many ships."

"Vrrl ships carry a lot of personnel," Mims explained. "Their preferred method of combat is to knock out the shields and board with a bunch of Hunters."

"A tactic the humans are prepared for," Scarrend added. "Our Hunters will be more effective as pilots." He gave the holodisplay a troubled look.

"What?" Yvian asked.

"It's not important." Yvian gave him a look. The Vrrl sighed. "It's just... Using human ships. Killing from a distance. It's not what we do. If you had suggested such a thing three months ago I would have laughed." His frown deepened. "Or tried to kill you. I am beginning to see why the Warmaster sent me here."

"I thought he sent you to learn martial arts," Yvian reminded him.

"That was the reason he gave." Scarrend ran hands through his mane. "The Warmaster rarely acts with only one goal in mind. I think he knows how limited we've been."

"He's talked about it before," Mims admitted.

"I expected to steal the Scargiver's methods." Scarrend shook his head. "I didn't know it would change me this much."

"You have become non-standard." Kilroy's eyes flashed blue for a moment. "It is a difficult thing."

"That's not what I meant," Scarrend corrected the machine. "I'm not afraid my people will reject me. I'm worried that there is so much that had to change. My life, my way of thinking..." He crossed two of his arms. "I have lived and learned in the way the Gods set out for us. To find so much of it is wrong..."

"Not wrong," Mims told him. "Limited. Intentionally so."

Scarrend spared him a sharp glance. "What do you mean?"

"Think about it," Yvian jumped in. "You know the story. The Varma made you. Genetically programmed you to worship them. And they built an entire culture to keep you from questioning their methods. Or anything, really."

"They've been dead for two hundred years," Mims pointed out, "and your people still follow their rules."

"It's not... They wouldn't..." Scarrend growled. "They made us!"

"They made you to be slaves," said Yvian. "Don't you see? Everything they taught, everything they did, it was to control you."

"The Gods would never do such a thing!" Scarrend unsheathed all six sets of his claws. "They weren't evil. They were not like the humans!"

"They used your people," Yvian argued. "They used your people, and then they tried to slaughter you when they didn't need you anymore. You know the story." She met his glare, willing him to accept it. "They were exactly like the humans."

"THEY WERE NOT!" The Vrrl's roar shook the bridge. It froze Yvian in place, turned her blood to ice. He raised one of his hands, chest heaving. His claws shook, trembling with the need to strike. "You will not insult my Gods, pixen! Friend or no!"

"Scarrend." Captain Mims voice was calm. Yvian could barely hear it over the ringing in her ears. "Sit down."

The Vrrl whirled on him. "I do not-"

"SIT DOWN!" The Captain thundered. It was nearly as loud as Scarrend's roar. Yvian flinched. So did Scarrend. Mims pointed at a chair. "Now."

Slowly, the Vrrl sat. It was an odd thing. Yvian had never seen a member of Scarrend's species use a chair. Judging from the awkward way the beast was sitting, she suspected Scarrend hadn't either. He growled to himself, teeth bared.

Mims waited for the Vrrl to finish shifting around, then said, "You threatened a member of my crew."

Scarrend's growl cut off. His eyes widened. "No! I didn't..." His gaze flicked guiltily to Yvian. "I didn't mean to..."

The Captain stared him down, cold as the void. "Do you remember what we talked about?"

"I didn't-"

Mims spoke softly. "Do you remember?"

Scarrend hung his head. "Yes."

"You've been with us a while now." The Captain stayed in his seat, but Yvian got the impression he was looming. "Saved our asses on Tenril Station. I like to think we all bonded a little."

"Scargiver, I didn't mean-" Shame and fear warred in Scarrend's features.

"Shut up and listen." Mims leaned forward, hands on the table that housed the holodisplay. "I told you before. This crew, they're not just people I work with. They're friends. Family. Not every crew is like that, but this one is. We'll argue sometimes. We'll do stupid things and say hurtful shit. What we will not do, what you can never, never do, is hurt each other. When you try to kill a member of the crew, you're not crew anymore. You understand?"

Scarrend shifted uncomfortably. His voice small, he answered, "Yes."

"This is my ship." Mims gestured around the bridge. "Whatever position we hold in Pixa, or whatever deals we make, this ship is mine. I'm the Captain, and I say what goes. I say who's crew and who isn't. And if one of us gets hurt or killed or thrown out, it will be because I say so. Do you understand?"

"Yes."

"Good." Mims leaned in a little more. "If you raise a hand against anyone on this crew, I will kill you. I will irradiate your body and send your mutilated corpse back to the Warmaster in shame. Just like I promised."

"If Big Daddy Mims is unable to fulfill his promise," Kilroy interjected, "this unit will do so in his stead."

"Thank you Kilroy," Mims gave the machine a nod. He turned back to the Vrrl. "You're one of us now, Scarrend. You're under my protection just like the girls."

"And this unit," Kilroy asserted.

"I don't want to hurt you." Mims ignored the Peacekeeper. "But I absolutely will. Do you understand?"

"Yes." The Vrrl nodded. He turned to Yvian. "I have failed the Mafdet. I... how do you say?" He stood, clasping his hands behind him and thrusting his belly forward. Then he lowered his head. "I have transgressed. Lend me your forgiveness, and I shall make amends."

Yvian blinked. The Vrrl's outburst had startled her, but not nearly as much as the Captain's reaction to it. "Forgiveness is lent." She swallowed as she tried to get her thoughts in order. "Uh, maybe you could lend me some, too. I wasn't trying to make you upset."

"Of course." The beast gave a rueful snort. "I suppose I shouldn't expect a pixen to understand the Empire's Gods."

"What?" Yvian frowned. "I think you're the one that doesn't-"

"Yvian!" The Captain's voice snapped like a stunwhip. He shook his head at her confused expression. "He's not ready. Let it go."

"Ready for what?" asked Scarrend.

"The Sixth Mafdet." Mims scowled. "Now can we focus, please? This battle will determine the fate of two nations. We should at least pretend to be professionals."

A few minutes later, eight million gladiator class fighter joined the fight. A small complement of ten thousand YEETs followed a few seconds later. Yvian didn't expect them to have much impact, outnumbered as they were. She was wrong.

The Peacekeeper controlled ships immediately disabled every YEET and capitol ship within thirty kilometers. Federation vessels did not have the built in redundancies the Vrrl had been forced to adopt. A single MAC round was enough to destroy a ship's reactor, and two more would take out emergency power. The Peacekeepers dodged and weaved and exchanged fire with enemy fighters as they systematically moved across the sector, a trail of Federation vessels left dead in their wake.

"By the Empire," Scarrend swore. "Its like watching the Scargiver fight."

"Incorrect," Kilroy chided. "Big Daddy Mims does not have the same effectiveness as Peacekeeper units."

"It's true," Mims admitted. "But Peacekeepers are almost as good."

The Federation reacted with admirable speed. Destroyers and battlecruisers moved closer to the Vrrl fleets, while the fighters broke contact and accelerated towards the Peacekeepers en mass. YEET Artillery Barges moved away from both groups, heading for deep space to employ their MAC cannons with as little risk to themselves as possible. Yvian noted sourly that the humans reacted the same way in each sector at exactly the same time. Yvian had been in the simulator enough to know just how hard it was to shift strategies with such a large number of ships. To assess the threat, make a plan, and give orders to millions of pilots in under two minutes? It shouldn't have been possible. Not humanly possible, anyway.

"Reba. Crunch take her." Yvian scowled at the display. "Shouldn't the Vrrl be moving in?"

"What for?" Mims raised an eyebrow at her. "So they can eat MAC rounds? They're staying at the edge of firing range for a reason, Yvian."

"Oh." She turned back to the display. Her brow furrowed. "Then why... Oh." That was why the Vrrl had done so poorly. Their big ships couldn't outrun the gladiators, and their fighters couldn't stand up to SHIELDBREACH weaponry. As impressive as Federation battlecruisers might be, it was the gladiators that were doing most of the damage.

A half hour later saw the Peacekeepers out of the battle lines. The units were forced into a running fight against three hundred million gladiators per sector. Casualties were light, all things considered. Eighty thousand Peacekeepers had been destroyed. A small price for taking a hundred twenty million humans out of the fight. Yvian hoped the rest of them could stay alive. Eight million Peacekeepers was a lot more Kilroys than she wanted to lose.

"Where the scat are our reinforcements?" Scarrend rumbled. "What's taking Warmaster Sithis so long?"

"I'm sure she'll be there soon," Lissa tried to reassure him.

"Two thirds of our defense fleets are dead." The Vrrl snarled. "We can't hold out much longer."

"Sithis has to organize hundreds of millions of people and ships," Mims reminded him. "That's not a quick process."

"It is for Peacekeeper units," Kilroy pointed out.

"You're not helping."

Eighteen minutes later, Vrrl reinforcements finally started to stream out the Gate. Yvian immediately understood the delay. Scarrend's estimate had been overly generous. Warmaster Sithis had only managed to muster a hundred ninety million ships of the Empire, only thirty million of which were battlecruisers or bigger. The Warmaster had had no choice but to incorporate Pixa's donated fleet into her main force. Anything less and the humans would tear them to pieces.

The humans reacted once again with frightening speed and coordination. Before the Vrrl forces even finished exiting the Gate, every single human ship activated its jumpdrive. Thirty seconds later, they were gone. The battle had ended.

"Crunch." Yvian slumped in her chair. "I need a beer now."

"Beer and sleep," Lissa agreed. "And maybe a cuddle."

"Ladies," Captain Mims wore a pained expression. "We've still gotta coordinate with the Warmasters, and operation BACKLINE's still going. Can we please pretend to be professionals?"

Yvian and Lissa shared a look. The sisters nodded at each other.

"No," said Lissa.

"Give us beer," Yvian agreed.