I Became a Fake Priest the Saintess Is Obsessed With

5 – Alleyway(3)

“Ahhhhh…”

Unable to resist the surprise attack, I fell onto the ground.

The person who suddenly attacked was a small child.

The kid was thin and had short, red hair. It was hard to tell if the child was a boy or a girl.

The kid looked the oldest among the group, barely looked about 15.

I don’t know how a seemingly lean child could possess such strength, but the hit made my vision blurry with pain.

“What are you doing messing with my siblings!”

The kid asked aggressively, who preferred to hit first and ask questions later.

“I’m just a priest who came out for charity work…”

Confused from the blow to my head, I answered.

“Don’t lie! There are crazy priests sneaking into the back alley!”

I was speechless at the child’s logic.

Even the most devout priests do not set foot in the back alleys.

Even if they have the desire to volunteer, imperial law does not permit persons of high standing such as priests to enter dangerous back alleys.

Still, it’s not like I came here by choice…

“Big Brother Miguel! He’s really a priest! He gave us pills that will take away our hunger!”

“Don’t be fooled, Cirin. Just like last time, a dark wizard tempted you, I stopped you, yet you still eat what others give you?”

“But we had nothing to eat…”

“Lily! I told you I would bring you food!”

“But sister always feeds us a little…”

“That’s…”

When the child continued to be cautious around me, the children on my side tried to reassure the little redhead.

After listening to the conversation, I realized that she was the true leader of this horde.

Was this “Miguel” they’ve been talking about since earlier, that child?

‘Sigh…I need to calm down…’

It may seem unfair to have been hit on the head, but the presence of this Miguel is something I can be grateful for. Why? Because.

[Sub Quest: Cure the Sick in the Back Alleys (4/5)]

Reward: Possibility of High Priest Appointment Increases

※If failed, you die.

One more person needs to be cured to complete this quest.

All the children that I treated in the back alley are suffering from malnutrition.

Then that red-haired child must be malnourished too.

Well… it might not be…

Would a friendly-looking child really eat well in secret?

‘No, how can a kid who can’t even eat properly have such strength?’

I’m doubtful of Miguel’s surprising strength, but I must cure this little one to complete the quest.

“Miguel? May I invite you to try this as well? It’s a nutritional supplement full of nourishment.”

I approached Miguel, as if I had forgotten about being hit.

“Don’t push that stuff on me!”

Miguel waved his club and struck at my hand.

I reflexively dodged the attack, but in doing so I dropped the container of pills and the pills scattered across the floor.

Damn it, these were all painstakingly crafted by hand and illegal.

Sighing inwardly, she took another bottle of pills from her bag.

Because each of the pills were different types of medicine, she had prepared several bottles.

“Just try one, just one!”

As the last one, she found her temper hastily rising.

Ah, how she truly wished to escape this eerie place quickly.

“You…! I told you not to force those on me… Ack!”

“Seriously! Just take it already!”

She forcefully shoved the pills into the protesting Miguel’s mouth.

And then she uttered the silent spell.

‘Oh my god, to the mother of earth, I offer this body and soul. Please raise this lamb again’

“Ahem! Ahch…?”

As the pill entered Miguel’s mouth, he made a full but then gradually confused expression.

“Gulp… I, I’m really full…?”

“See, Miguel! You’re really full, aren’t you?”

“Uh, um…”

“Miguel, you stubborn fool! Wimp!”

“No… But… Uggh, ugh…”

As Miguel was being teased by the others, his expression gradually worsened as he began to vomit on the floor.

‘Ah, right. This isn’t an empty pill’

Thinking about it, the pill she had given Miguel was a special pill she had made, a crap pill.

Having heard that bitter medication was common in this world, she had specially ground some bitter herbs and put it inside the pill.

The herb in the pill doesn’t harm humans, but induces vomiting upon consumption.

The disgusting taste of the rising stomach acid had earned the pill the name, “crap pill.”

‘Crap. That’s the hardest one to make’

Wasting the crap pill she had painstakingly made was a pity, but it doesn’t matter.

[You have completed the quest!]

Reward: Increased possibility of being appointed as Senior Priest

The quest was completed by curing Miguel.

She didn’t feel any particular pain from treating the young man, whether he was actually malnourished or not.

“Hmm… Immunity to the pain of malnutrition is good… but will there be anyone else suffering from malnutrition in the Empire in the future…?”

It’s a well-known empire for leading a decent life.

I could mess around in alleys, if I wanted to…

But do I really need to risk things and head down an alley?

Huh… Right… Hmm…

Good things are good, after all.

Anyway, I’ve completed the quest so it’s time to head home.

“Hey, you! Are you just going to leave like this?”

I was planning on escaping while the kids were blissfully full, but Miguel, who had emptied his heart out, called me.

I paused and turned back.

“Yes, I’ve treated all of you so now I’m thinking of going to the cathedral.”

“Cathedral? Are you really a priest? But why would a priest be in an alley…?”

“I told you, I was volunteering.”

I answered reluctantly.

“Don’t lie…! There’s no way a priest would help us…! Tell us, you… You’re a dark mage trying to use us as experiment subjects for that potion!”

Miguel, who said this, had a face that looked like he was about to cry for some reason.

It seemed like he might have had a story regarding the priest or the dark mage, but I was not particularly interested in Miguel’s story.

“If you want to believe that, then believe it…”

I didn’t bother disproving Miguel’s suspicions.

I simply used the kids to complete the quest.

Perhaps I’m no different from a dark mage experimenting with potions, just like what Miguel said.

“You’ll come back, won’t you…?”

A little girl named Lily looked at me hopefully.

Even if I were a hypocrite, I could have taken the kids and irresponsibly sent them to an orphanage.

But I’m a thorough rogue and a scammer.

I don’t want to take responsibility for the kids just to drop the pretense of righteousness.

But it seems the goddess has other thoughts.

[Main Quest Continues]

[Main Quest: Earn Over 80 Affection Points from Alley’s Miguel]

Time Remaining: 30 days

Current Affection Points: 40

Reward: ???, significantly increased chances of becoming a high priest.

※Failure results in death.

Death… well, I don’t care even if it’s threatening me with death this time.

Because I was planning on continuing my quest before I even started it.

“Okay, kid, I’ll come by next time too.”

I smiled politely and said goodbye to the kids.

I retraced my steps and tried to leave the alleyway I had come from.

[The goddess asks if you are a tsundere]

“Ha, what the hell is a tsundere? I’m just trying to boost my reputation by being immune to malnutrition.”

[The goddess nods, agreeing that you are indeed a tsundere]

Ugh, this damn goddess.

Now everything I say is just right?

While I was arguing with the goddess, I stumbled over something.

It was the corpse of a little rat.

It seemed to have been attacked by some beast with its body in a terrible state.

“……Was it always like this? I need to get the hell out of here. It gives me the creeps.”

Faced with this visual that is assaulting my senses, I picked up the pace.

Fortunately, I safely escaped the back alley.

The alleyway was a bit dark and confusing, but it wasn’t as dangerous as I thought it would be.

“Hmm…The alleyway wasn’t as bad as I was led to believe.”

I hastily covered my mouth.

That’s because such remarks could act as a prelude to danger the next time I visit a back alley.

“Sigh… I finally went outside but I guess I’ll have to go back.”

It just so happened that it was a beautiful moonlit night when I managed to escape the back alley.

I’m a bit disappointed that I couldn’t make it to the casino, but there is a rule that priests shouldn’t be out late at night, so I have to go back.

“Why are the Imperial laws so strict on priests?”

Should I just go to the casino?

Despite venting my dissatisfaction so colorfully, having come to the empire, one must follow the laws of the empire.

As it was hard for an incapable individual to change the law, I obediently returned to the monastery.

“You’ve arrived… Father Ivan…?”

Upon my arrival at the monastery, I was greeted by a lady as beautiful as a human embodiment of a goddess.

“You didn’t forget that you’re starting my treatment today, did you?”

hahahaha…

Indeed, I agreed to cure the nun’s curse in exchange for freedom.

Oh, such terrible agony.

***

The nun seemed rather urgent, leading me to her quarters within the monastery.

I attempted some resistance, but the nun simply dragged me along as if were nothing.

Why is it that a little kid or a nun is stronger than I am?

‘Right, I was born with a strength scale of one.’

The answer to my question was simpler than expected.

Simply put, I was incredibly weak, and she was much stronger than I was.

“This is my room, Father.”

Finally, the nun had dragged me into her room.

Her room was quite neat.

Nothing particular stood out, though the bed seemed a bit large for a single occupant.

On such a bed, Amelia, the nun, laid down after lifting the hem of her dress.

“Now, please begin the treatment.”

Is it okay for a nun who has pledged her chastity to God to lie defenselessly before a man like this?

Or does she just trust me that much?

Thankfully, the sight of her body didn’t arouse me as she probably expected.

Trembling in fear, I gazed at the grotesque traces of the curse smeared on her thigh.

I’m scared, really scared, but I have to treat her.

If I don’t want to be expelled from the cathedral, I have to treat the nun.

Gritting my teeth, I placed my hand on her thigh.

“Uh…!”

I heard an odd sound but ignored it.

The affected area must hurt; it’s not like the nun would be excited about it.

“My God, I offer up this flesh and spirit to the mother of the earth. Please raise the lamb.”

As I recited the spell from my mouth, the traces of the curse faded away.

“Th, thank you, Father!”

Having healed her, the saint hastily sent me away.

Finding it quite awkward, I looked up at the moon from the corridor window.

And a nagging question surfaced in my mind.

‘Why don’t I feel any pain?’

I had healed the saint’s curse, but there was no pain in my thigh.