I've been waiting for you forever

When Eliza told him she would find him a place to stay for the night, Arthur had assumed she would take him to her house.

So when the taxi pulled up in front of the imposing building of a five-star hotel, Arthur's eyes widened almost comically in shock, then a wave of nervousness suddenly overwhelmed him when he remembered that he couldn't register under his real name to get a room.

His escape from Arkham had only been a few days before, the news was still too fresh in the minds of the citizens of Gotham City. Luckily Eliza didn't follow the local news, but she had surely heard of the serial killer known as the Joker. What was he supposed to tell her, that he had escaped from a criminal asylum where he had been locked up for killing six people?

"Arthur, you look upset. Is something wrong?"

Eliza's voice was gentle, filled with warm, sincere concern. Arthur had never met anyone like her; no one had ever wasted a second of their time worrying about him in his entire pathetic, miserable life. Suddenly tears welled up in his eyes. Eliza was beautiful, and caring, and she looked at him like he was someone worthy of worry, of care, of affection. She would never have looked at him like that again if she had known he was a cold-blooded killer. If she had known him for who he really was.

Suddenly breathing felt difficult; his heart was pounding, his head was spinning, and he thought he was going to pass out at any moment.

Arthur clutched the seats of the cab with both hands, his breathing coming out in shallow, labored tones.

"Arthur, it's okay." Eliza's voice broke through the fog of his mind. "Calm down, you're having a panic attack. Close your eyes and take deep breaths. Nothing bad is going to happen to you, I'm right here with you. I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere. Concentrate on the sound of my voice and try to calm your breathing."

Eliza's tone was firm, encouraging. For the first time in his life, Arthur felt safe, cradled and protected by a loving presence. Eliza was with him. Everything was going to be okay.

When he opened his eyes, his breathing had normalized.

"How did you do it?" Arthur asked, his tone full of wonder.

Eliza smiled, but her eyes were sad. "Let's just say it's not the first time it's happened to me. I've had many of these attacks since I was very little. You feel like you're going to faint, or die, or something terrible is about to happen, but it's all in your head."

"This is the first time it's happened to me."

"I knew it. I hope it doesn't happen to you again. I don't like to see you suffer."

"I'm not suffering." Not anymore, Arthur thought. Since I met you, the pain seems bearable.

Eliza gave him a real smile this time. Small, but full of joy. "Good. Look, I know you can't afford a hotel, but if that's why you're so anxious, you don't have to worry. I'll take care of everything." A polite way of saying she'd pay for it, Arthur thought. "And you can stay here as long as you want."

"A motel would be fine, you didn't have to bother so much."

"Are you kidding? Do you know how dirty those places are? You'd get some disease if you slept there! This hotel is great, it's the best in town! You'll be fine here."

Arthur still looked hesitant. "There's one more thing. I can't register under my real name." He tried to think of a good excuse quickly. "I, um… stole food from a supermarket yesterday." Well, at least that was true. "I hadn't eaten anything for two days, so…" He licked his lips nervously before continuing, "The police are looking for me, they'd arrest me if they knew I was here."

"Arthur, you were hungry, there's no reason for you to feel guilty. I probably would have done the same thing in your place."

"You can't know that." You would never kill six people. You could never be as cruel as me. You could never hurt anyone, you could never do anything wrong.

"I stole a doll once. When I was four or five, I don't remember exactly. It was such a stupid thing… my parents never let me go without anything. Love, attention, toys. I had dozens of dolls. But that day I stole one from a toy store. They were partly on display on the street, and I reached out and took it. It was very small, so I hid it under my coat. What I'm trying to tell you, Arthur, is that you didn't do anything wrong. You stole something you needed to live. I did it on a whim. I stole something just to see if I could do it. And I got away with it. I didn't deserve it, but that's how it went. No one ever found out. You're the first person I've ever told. If I got away with it, you can too."

"What?"

"I'll register the room in my name, you'll go in the back and up the back stairs.

I'll ask for a room on the second floor, you'll just have to go up the stairs to that and then we'll meet in the hallway. No one will see you, you can rest assured. Do you trust me?"

He shouldn't have. Arthur had trusted recklessly too many times in the past, and he had always come away with a broken heart. With Penny, with Lee, even with Jackie, and look how it ended. Bruises on his body, on his heart, in his soul.

Eliza risked being yet another wound, yet another person who would make fun of him and trample on his heart.

But looking into her clear hazel eyes, without judgment, without hate, without derision, only full of warmth, he understood that there was only one possible answer.

"Yes. I trust you."