Ketch Me as I Fall

*Elly POV*

"Where's your father?" I asked, gently kissing the top of Ally's head as I came into the front room.

She took another bite of cereal and shrugged. "Alex needed help on a hunt. I was gonna go, but he caught me and went instead."

"Don't talk with your mouthful." I teased lightly, then sighed. "You tried to sneak out to help on a hunt?"

"It wasn't like I was going alone. Alex was there." Ally insisted, "I would've been fine."

"If she were in trouble, you would not have been fine." I sat down in front of her. "Has she contacted you at all since then?"

"Nope." She almost sounded nonchalant.

I frowned a little at her before getting up again and ruffling her hair on the way by. I walked back down the hallway searching Jack's room, pausing just before the door as my phone began to ring in my pocket. I pulled it free and answered.

"Hello, Sunbeam."

I smiled. "Luci. You went out last night?"

Lucifer's voice was soft as he answered. "Alex needed help. I wasn't about to let Sapphire go."

"Is she ok?" I knocked on Jack's door, lowering my phone to talk through it briefly. "We're gonna hit traffic if you don't hurry up, Jack."

"Almost ready!" Jack called through the door.

"Ya," Lucifer said, pulling my attention back to him. "They're both alright, sleeping actually. Are you and Jack still leaving today?"

"Planned on it," I replied, turning my back towards the front room again. "I was thinking about stealing Baby."

"Dean won't be happy."

"Ya well. He can bitch about it later." I shrugged. "Plus all the others stick out too much. They're nice classics, but almost too classic."

"Oh, ya," Lucifer said, sarcasm thick in his tone. "Because any of our cars are what a normal person drives."

"Ready?" Jack said as he came up behind me, backpack already slung over his shoulder.

I smiled at him with a nod. "I've got to go," I said to Lucifer. "Love you."

"I love you too, Sunbeam."

I shoved the phone back into my pocket before picking up my pack from beside the table. I pulled ALly from her chair and into a one-armed hug. 

"We're heading out now," I said. "Sam and Dean will be here if you need anything."

"Ok, mom." She said. "Stay safe."

"And don't be alone with Cael," I said, ruffling her hair once more before stepping away from her.

"Mom." Ally groaned. "Bye."

I pulled the car into the hotel parking lot and found a spot relatively close to the room we had booked ahead of time. I hadn't been able to steal Baby after all, but the black and red 1986 Jeep CJ would do perfectly fine for our little hunting trip. 

"This sound good?" I asked Jack hesitantly.

He had barely spoken a word the entire three-and-a-half-hour drive to Grant, Nebraska. Which seemed very out of character for him. He was usually so talkative with everyone, but this just made everything seem so…awkward.

"Yes," Jack answered, a quick smile coming to his face as he looked at me.

He hadn't seemed to change much since the last time I had been in this world. I guess it had only been five years for him so that wouldn't be abnormal, but it was still hard for me to process that even in that time, he looked like he hadn't aged more than a year. 

And there were other underlying issues than just the fake Nephilim never seemed to age. Jack had never been able to understand how I could love Lucifer, his father. I had been able to more or less keep all thoughts of Jack in the back of my mind while at the bunker or home, but now we were alone together. I couldn't help but feel like I was trapped in the middle all over again.

I stepped lightly out of the car and Jack followed, silently helping me take things out of the back and to our room. The silence between us began to grow deafening. I was starting to question if this had all been a horrible mistake. I tossed my pack to the floor and inhaled deeply, placing my hands on my hips.

"What would you like to do first?" I asked, turning to face Jack. He was standing in front of the other bed. He shrugged, and I frowned. This was going to be harder than I thought. "We could go into town and check it out. We could grab something to eat or find a quiet spot to…"

"I don't eat." He interrupted matter of factly, letting his bag fall to the floor as well.

I licked my lips in slight annoyance and nodded. "I know, I'm just trying to…"

"I know what you're trying to do." Jack cut me off again, though his voice stayed its normal monotone. "I might technically only be seven years old, but I'm not stupid."

"I don't think you are. I wasn't trying to imply that…"

"I do not mind hunting with you. I really do like you, Elly." Jack interrupted yet again. "But you are not my mother."

And there it was. The knife in my side that needed to apparently be dug just a little deeper. And now that it was out in the open, we couldn't ignore it anymore. I knew that it had been coming, but the sting still hurt. I had been trying so hard to think of a way to make this workout, even if I still had no idea what I was doing. But it seemed like this crossroads was one we were destined to cross.

I struggled to find the words for any kind of response. It seemed like all the moisture had left my mouth and gone to my hands instead. I wiped them off on my pants and hoped that what I was about to say was the right thing.

"I know I could never replace Kelly, Jack." He tipped his head to the side as I spoke, like a curious puppy. "She loved you very much and was a very wonderful woman. I don't want to replace her. But I was hoping to at least try to be your friend."

Jack seemed to be shocked by this, staying silent for longer than I would've hoped. Eventually, he cleared his throat and looked away from me.

"Did you know her?" He sounded almost hopeful.

"Not personally," I admitted, and Jack seemed to shrink. "But I know she loved you. She did everything she could just for you."

"Why are you still alive?"

The question struck me like an unexpected backhand. My eyebrows furrowed as I tried to make sense of it. "I…I'm sorry?"

"If Ally is the same as I am, then why are you alive and my mom's not?" It was almost a childish question.

But that's what he was. An all-powerful Nephilim born into this world seven years ago, forced to grow up before he could mature. He hadn't even seemed to grow up since we had left. I was sure Cas and Dean had done their best, but an angel and a man who grew up without much of a father could only do so much. But it wasn't like I knew what I was doing half the time either. Parenthood was almost always a fifty-fifty chance of pass or fail.

"Because in my world, my home, none of this exists. It's not real there." I tried to explain gently. "Ally was just a normal baby until we came here."

"That's not fair," Jack grumbled quietly, making his way past me and to the door. "You mentioned food and you haven't eaten yet today. Let's go find something to eat and I can fill you in on the case."

I gave a small nod and followed.

"That's incredibly fucked up," I whispered across the table, not sure what else to say in response. "What the hell?"

The diner around us was quiet enough that we spoke in hushed tones. Other I was sure that anyone who was even slightly interested in eavesdropping would think we were insane, legend hunters, or both.

"It sounded interesting." Jack shrugged, not even bothering to lift his eyes from the laptop in front of him. "Have you heard of anything that does this?"

"It kinda sounds like a werewolf." I said, "But I've never heard of one being that…. aggressive."

"And it left the hearts." Jack pointed out. "I'll keep researching then."

"How long has it been killing?" I asked.

"The first body showed up around 2001. There were four all together before a man named Max Herd was arrested and tried for the murders." Jack read from the screen. "He was sentenced to death and the murders stopped happening until recently that is. The most recent one this time showed up last year, and there have been six so far."

"So they either got the wrong guy and the right one is escalating." I commented softly, "Or there's a copycat. Is Max dead?"

"As far as these records say…" Jack mumbled. "He's still on death row."

I nodded and took a slow drink from the cup in front of me, taking a look around to see if we had attracted any attention after all. But everyone else seemed to be happily partaking in their conversations, oblivious to the supernatural world under their noses. Jack looked up then as well, taking his scan before returning quickly to the laptop.

"Maybe we should talk to him?" Jack asked, his tone more looking for approval than really asking.

"We can try to. But death row is tricky." I said.

"I see…" He sounded almost disappointed. The air between us changed, thickening with a tension that was bitter on my tongue.

"It's not a bad idea. Maybe since this is a small town we'll have better lick with it. I can ask around." I tried to give him an encouraging smile, but when Jack returned it, I could tell there was no emotion behind it. Had this been a mistake after all? "Did you get anything else?"

"Everything else seems pretty straightforward," Jack answered. I laughed a little at the thought of that. "I mean, as straightforward as dead bodies turning up without heads, hands, or feet can be."

That almost made me smile again. Jack was sweet and funny. I was ashamed of myself for thinking that I could never have accepted him. It had been a jealous and selfish thing to think. The poor boy had enough going on without me trying to push him away from his only family.

"I want to know what they used to cut the bodies up. It doesn't say in the articles." Jack continued. "It also looks like all the victims are coming from the local all-boys catholic school."

"Then we start there," I said, adding another kind smile to it. "Sound good to you?"

"Can I pick out the disguises?"

"Sure."

Jack was original, I could give him that. He had seemed to take a liking to Dean's want to be something other than law enforcement unless necessary. But even with that, I never once imagined I'd be pretending to be a parent to sneak a pretend student into a school. I had thought we would do some weird priest and nun gag, but this seemed much more simple and elegant.

"Mrs. Lightbringer?" An older priest with graying hair and a large nose asked as we entered through the front door of the rather expensive-looking private school.

I had never known such a small town to have a school so expensive looking in it. There was no way the local kids all went here. It was too pristine and rich for that. It reminded me of my hometown when I was a kid. We hadn't even had enough kids to fill the middle school, they had to combine three other town schools with ours just to make it work. 

"That's a very interesting last name." The priest commented as we walked up to him.

"It's just another family name, Father Brennan" I smiled sweetly at him and took his hand to shake as he extended it to me. "It's very kind of you to meet with us on such a short notice."

"Of course." The man smiled back, just as fake as the one on my face. "It is no problem at all."

"This is Jack, my son." I placed my hand on Jack's shoulder. I didn't miss his uncomfortable shift under my hand.

Father Brennan smiled at Jack and motioned for us to follow him. "Why don't you go run and meet the other boys in the courtyard, Jack? That way I can talk to your mother in private. They should be in the middle of their lunch break."

Jack's bright green eyes shifted to mine as he thought for a second, a silent uncomfortable thought at the notion of leaving me alone crossed them before he nodded. Jack walked carefully towards the group of boys we could just now see through another door on the other side of the large entrance hall. They were passing a ball back and forth between several ancient-looking fountains.

"Now, Mrs. Lightbringer." Father Brennan focused on me again as we continued to walk down the hall. "Tell me a little about your son."

"Well…" I chuckled softly, trying to think of anything I could say about Jack. "He's very bright, but he is shy and tends to have a hard time expressing himself."

"Ah. A gentle soul." the priest nodded, holding another door open for me.

I stepped through it and paused to look around. The walls were made of ornate stone reliefs of beautifully carved figures. The stone floors seemed to flow up into the walls as if they had all been carved from a singular piece of granite. Each was accented with a wooden column that almost looked as if it had been bent and twisted into shape by a giant pair of hands. Old oak doors, some opened but most closed, lined the walls. There was a desk in the center of the floor with a receptionist behind it. And beyond her was a tall staircase that led to a second floor. A large crystal chandelier hung in the center of the ceiling.

"That's not a problem here, we have plenty who need to find ways out of their shells." Father Brennan's voice brought me back to the present and I continued to follow him, around the receptionist desk and up the stairs. "Do you mind telling me why you'd like to enroll him here?"

I cleared my throat, trying to bring myself further into the present and ignore the rising anxiety in my throat. I didn't belong here. This was something so far above my pay grade that even my bones knew we shouldn't be here.

"His father and I believe that the structure would be good for him." I settled on. "We've just gotten married and I don't think he's adapting well to the situation as much as we hoped he would."

"So you are his stepmother." Father Brennan nodded in understanding. "That is a rather large life adjustment. I do not mean to pry but what…"

"She passed when he was very young. It's just been him and his father most of his life." I said with a sad smile. "We've been trying to work it all out, going to counseling and whatnot, but it hasn't been helping a whole lot."

The old priest nodded as we got to the second floor. "Sometimes it is difficult to help someone who doesn't know they need the help yet. But I am sure he will fit in just fine here. What does the boy's father do?"

"He's an entrepreneur," I stated as we passed by several classrooms. "He does a little bit of everything. Travels here and there, but always home for the important things. He's never once missed a birthday or soccer game."

"And what about you?" That was unexpected.

It gave me pause. What did I do? It had been years since I had even tried to hold down a job. But a stay-at-home Mom who occasionally hunted down supernatural monsters wasn't going to work here.

"I work from home mostly. I'm a CPA." I had no idea what I was talking about. I didn't know a single thing about taxes. I barely even knew how to pay the. I had to change the subject. "Thank you again for this opportunity, father."

"It is no trouble at all." We stepped through another archway and came into another large hallway with more doors. "These are the boys dorms. They are welcome to go home on weekends or if you really would rather him stay at home, we can arrange that as well."

"I'm sure he would prefer to be here."

"You start tomorrow," I said, sighing as we got back into the car. "Get your uniform?"

"Mhm," Jack said softly.

"And you're sure this is how you want to do this?" I asked.

"We need to have someone on the inside. How else will we catch the person killing all of them?" Jack asked, taking a deep breath.

I winced at the thought. I had never encountered something that removed body parts like this after it had killed them. And then it just left the bodies out in the open for anyone to come across. The pictures of those bodies would stay with me for a long time after this hunt.

As far as we had been able to tell from the limited information we had gotten, the bodies had been drained of all their blood as well. Another thing that typical werewolves didn't do. There was no way this was a wolf but it had been the only thing my mind had been drawn to. Especially with the rather large slashes and gases in the bodies. 

With this new set of deaths, the first several kills had been in the same spots as the ones from 2001. Same location around the outskirts of the woods, the same death positions, even the remains of the bodies themselves looked almost identical and had been from this same school. But with the most recent two deaths, they had started to become their own thing. New spots, new spaces, new gouges. The copycat had run out of things to copy, forcing him to now create his own works of art.

My phone rang as we pulled back into the motel lot, I pulled it free from my pocket. It was Alex.

"Hey," I answered reflexively. "How are things going? Heard you got into some trouble."

"I never want to see another graveyard ever again. And when I die, do not put me in a goddamn box. Please." Her voice sounded small and almost…shattered. Something bad must have happened.

"What happened?" I asked, worry flooding through me as Jack got out of the car. His head turned towards me in interest.

"I don't want to talk about it right now, but we're ok. Thanks to your boyfriend. I…" Alex paused. I waited with my tongue pressed between my teeth. "I feel like I owe you an apology. I've been so harsh to him. We… talked things over and I think I understand him a little better now. I'm sorry for the hurt I've caused." Her words confused me, but her voice held something so deep and honest that I knew she was speaking from a good place. 

"Thank you?" I muttered, a small smile crossing my face. Maybe there would be less drama between them all now. "Did you find the book?"

"You know it wasn't that easy." She laughed a little. "But we'll keep looking. I'll let ya go, I just wanted to let you know we were ok."

"Thank you." I sighed in a little relief. I hadn't realized I had been so worried about her and Ketch. "Jack and I will be home in a few days, I'm hoping. This case seems pretty complicated."

"I want details when you get back," Alex said.

"As long as you give me some too." I joked. "I'll talk to you later."

"Bye, sunshine." The line went silent.

"Are they safe?" Jack asked, leaning into the passenger window. 

"Perfectly fine, I'm sure," I said, smiling softly.

"Why are you marrying him?" Jack's question caught me off guard as I left the vehicle.

I looked at Jack again, who was now staring at the ring on my finger. I stayed quiet as I walked around the car and to his side, not quite sure what to say.

"Because I love him." I settled on.

"Why?"

"Because he is a wonderful man." I shrugged.

Jack rolled his eyes. "Not at heart. You've heard all of the horrible things he's done."

I sighed and wished I knew of the right way, or anyway, to handle this. "I think maybe you should ask him about his experiences."

"Why should I care? He abandoned us. Not just me, but mom too." The aggression behind those words stunned me. "He ran away to be with you and I was left with Cas and Dean."

"I'm sure he didn't mean to aban…"

"How would you know!?" And there they were. The golden eyes that came out with his emotions, just like Ally's. "All he ever wanted me for was my power."

"Maybe in the beginning." I tried to offer.

But I had no idea how to defend the man I had only known on a screen to be a villain before I had met the real thing. A man who had never done anything in his life unless it was for himself alone until he was with me and had a child to care for. How was I supposed to explain anything to the child who had only ever seen the bad? Because he was right. I had taken Lucifer away from him and into my world. It had been Luci and me, not Luci and Jack like the show had ended.

"But he's told me how much he wants to get to know you." I tried again. "He does feel guilty about the past."

"Bull shit." Jack almost growled the curse and stomped away from me.

"Language." I found myself warning as if he was my child.

"You're not my mom!" Jack yelled across the parking lot.

I inhaled through my nose sharply, trying to stay calm. "You're right. I'm not. I'm sorry."

Jack crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at the ground. "He'll never want anything but power."

"It's been two decades since he's last seen you," I said softly. "A lot has happened in that time. He's different."

"I don't believe you." Jack huffed.

"You don't have to. Talk to him if you want to know." I wasn't going to fight with him more about this. There was no point in it. He would do whatever he wanted to do and nothing I said was going to change that. He was as stubborn as his father. "I'm sorry you feel like that. I hope we can work it out between us."

"Stop pretending like you care about me. You're just doing all this to make yourself feel better." Jack walked further away from me, closer to the motel room.

I opened my mouth but closed it again when I had nothing left to say. There would be a time when he would realize that wasn't the case. And me arguing with him wouldn't help him find it any faster.

"Have you ever been to school?" I asked after a silent minute, switching to topics as I walked up to him again.

Jack shifted slightly in front of the door. He raised an eyebrow at me, his eyes once again their natural soft green as he tried to switch emotional gears.

"No." He stated. "Dean homeschools me between hunts. But I've never seen much point in it because I don't need to know that the square root of two thousand nine hundred eighty-five is fifty-four point six to catch a mummy."

"I didn't know mummies were real." if only this conversation could stay like this. So simple and easygoing. If only we could stay in a good mood and not sway back into the molten pit of lava I'd been trying to drag us back out of the last twenty-four hours. 

"They aren't," Jack stated. "The corpses just get possessed by ghosts or demons. Not by curses."

"Tell me more?" I asked as we pushed into the motel room.