KYBER-PUNK 22BBY [Inspired Inventor+]

— V —

"GET A MISSILE RACK. BITCHES LOVE MISSILE RACKS."

"That's a bit much for my usual style and approach, Smasher."

"… FINE. UPGRADE YOUR SANDIE."

"My current Sandie is more than good enough. Not like I was pressed for choice. Got it when I got the job as your handler, so it's top-of-the-line Arasaka chrome. It works, it works well, I'm not going to get greedy."

"… CYBERDECK?"

"I was actually thinking of getting a pair of mantis blades slotted in."

"GET MANTIS BLADES, AND I DISOWN YOU."

"Wha-? Why?!"

"STUPID. TACKY. INEFFICIENT. JUST USE A REAL SWORD LIKE A NORMAL KILLER. WRISTS, HANDS, AND RANGE OF MOTION EXIST FOR A REASON."

"But… you aren't going to deny that blades as a concept are usually more inefficient than guns and blasters?"

"CLASSICS ARE CLASSICS. BLADES HAVE THEIR USES. AS DOES A GOOD HEAVY MACE TO PULVERISE SKULLS AND ARMOR. WE'RE LUCKY WE DON'T HAVE TO CHOOSE. SATISFYING MELEE IN ONE HAND. OVERWHELMING FIREPOWER IN THE OTHER. BEST KILLIN' FUN OF BOTH WORLDS."

"Well… You won't hear me arguing with that. You know how I like my knives, thrown or otherwise."

"… YOU'RE HALFWAY TO DECENT WITH THEM, TOO."

"Oh, my," V deadpanned. "What a compliment."

"DAMN STRAIGHT, IT IS. BEST IN THE BIZ SAYS YOUR HALF-DECENT. DON'T GO BITCHIN' NOW," Smasher rumbled back.

V sighed, "Did you have to come along for this? You're scaring the assistant tech."

Smasher glared, as he usually did, "MY CHROME NEEDS UPKEEP, TOO. NOT MY FAULT THIS GREEN-ASS TECH IS PUSSY AS FUCK. KENTO, CHOOSE BETTER HELP. HE'S AN INSULT TO THE WORK YOU DO."

"Your constructive criticism is noted, Smasher-sama," Kento Nakayama — one of Arasaka's best experimental rippers, Smasher's usual doc, and now V's by extension — said, unbothered and unflinching, unlike his current assistant. "The boy is a work in progress. He is unpracticed in masking his fear as a true man of the old way should. But he is young yet. I believe there is hope for him."

"CRASH COURSE, THEN," Smasher grunted. "HAVE HIM DO MY MAINTENANCE. FLY OR FUCK UP. GOOD PRACTICE FOR MEAT. YOU CAN CHECK IT AFTER, KENTO."

Kento nodded, "Indeed. Such a task would be good for him. Shoto, you will tend to Smasher-sama. If you master your fear, the maintenance is nothing you cannot handle. Fail, however, and Smasher-sama will undoubtedly smash you to gore."

Horror was written plain as day across the boy-tech's face. Still, he approached Smasher to do as his teacher instructed. Cute kid. Very young — 16 at most. And bearing a more than passing resemblance to Kento. His son or nephew. Yet Kento pushed him into the dragon's den anyway, perfectly hiding any fear he might've felt for the boy's potentially grizzly fate.

Kento was professional like that. It was why Smasher had a modicum of respect for him, enough to prefer him over any of Arasaka's other rippers. The boy — Shoto — visibly tried to master his horrified nerves. When he stood next to Smasher, the Legend purposefully tensed his servos. Shoto flinched. Hard. But he still forced himself forward the rest of the way and began working on Smasher's frame.

Smasher chuckled, a rare and ghastly sound from a borg like him, "SO DON'T FUCK UP, GREEN-ASS."

V winced in sympathy. Not much, but some. Enough to recognize that Shoto should've been pissing and shitting his pants by the second. That he wasn't said good things about him, despite his still-visible fear.

"Stars, Smasher… Being stuck with you is a constant ordeal…" V muttered. "Never boring, but…"

She trailed off, and Kento picked the rest with a surprisingly perceptive finish, "But living in interesting times can be the most terrible of curses."

"FOR MEAT-SACKS AND PATHETIC FODDER, MAYBE," Smasher rumbled. "THAT'S WHY THEY'RE FODDER. MEAT FOR THE SLAUGHTER. LEGENDS THRIVE IN INTERESTING TIMES. OR THEY DIE. EITHER WAY, THE GALAXY KEEPS TURNING. AND I KEEP KILLING."

Kento nodded, "As is the way of things. Now, V-san. Have you decided what I can do for you today?"

"I think…" V considered. "A bacta bio-pump wouldn't be remiss. First aid pumped right into my veins. Keep me going in a long fight. I kind of lack endurance at the moment. Chrome to help with that without messing up my current build should be what I aim for."

"WOULDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT THAT SHIT IF YOU DITCHED YOUR MEAT," Smasher grunted.

"Yes, Smasher, I'm aware of your stance on this," V acknowledged, rolling her eyes.

"… YOU'RE GETTING TOO FRAGGIN' COMFY WITH ME," Smasher grumbled. "I'LL STILL SMACK YOU AROUND IF YOU GIVE ME TOO MUCH LIP."

"Oh, kriff…" V exhaled in semi-sarcastic horror. "I am, aren't I? I'm getting- getting-… used to you! I can even tell that your threat just now was mostly empty!"

"NO THREAT I MAKE IS EMPTY," Smasher snarled.

V waved casually, "Sure, sure, but I know you like my spunk too much to seriously follow through with that one."

"… NOW, I MIGHT JUST TO FUCK WITH YOU."

"That-!… Okay, that is also something you'd do."

"YOU BARELY KNOW ME, V-MEAT. YOU'RE THE BEST HANDLER I'VE HAD IN A LONG TIME, BUT THAT'S NOT MUCH OF A BAR TO CLEAR. YOU STILL GOTTA PROVE YOU GOT STAYIN' POWER. KEEP KEEPIN' UP WITH ME, THOUGH, NO ONE WILL QUESTION YOU. IF THEY DO…"

V couldn't help the grin that crept over her face at Smasher's leading statement, "If they do, I fucking slaughter them until they don't."

"THATTA' GIRL, VALERIE… DAMN. FUCKING. STRAIGHT. IF YOUR PROBLEMS CAN'T BE SOLVED WITH VIOLENCE, YOU AREN'T KILLING HARD ENOUGH."

"I don't think that's technically true… But I like the thought of it, so we'll roll with it."

"IT'S TRUE. LOOK AT ME. NOT A PROBLEM IN THE GALAXY THAT CAN BOTHER ADAM FUCKING SMASHER."

"Is that so~? Hmm, I'm not sure I believe you. C'mon, Smasher, tell some old solo stories while we up our chrome to prove me wrong," V goaded.

Baleful red eyes set in a chrome face slowly turned to glare at her. V didn't bother containing her challenging smirk. A low digital growl turned to a chuff of begrudging amusement.

"YOU'VE GOT BIGGER BALLS THAN 99% OF THE MEN I'VE KILLED," Smasher admitted, adding a mutter that V barely caught after. "IT'S ALWAYS THE WOMEN IN THE LINE… LIMP-DICKED FUCKIN' SONS…"

Before V could truly begin wondering what that meant, Smasher continued, "FINE. YOU WANT SOME SOLO STORIES? I'LL TELL SOME FRAGGING SOLO STORIES. ADAM FUCKING SMASHER CAN HANDLE ANY CHALLENGE THE GALAXY HAS TO OFFER. I DON'T FUCKING FAIL. IF I COULDN'T KILL IT THE FIRST TIME, I CAME BACK WITH BIGGER GUNS AND KILLED IT DEAD THE SECOND. BEEN THAT WAY SINCE MY MEAT DAYS IN THE UNDER-LEVELS OF CORUSCANT. THE MOMENT I WENT FULL-BORG, I WENT STRAIGHT BACK 'HOME' AND SETTLED EVERY DEBT I HAD."

"You…" V blinked. "You're from the core? Coruscant, of all places?"

Smasher snorted, "UNDER-LEVELS AIN'T CORE. MIGHT BE ON THE SAME SHIT-HOLE PLANET, BUT THEY'RE AS FAR REMOVED FROM SENATORS AND SHINING SKYLINES AS THE OUTER RIM IS. LIFE'S JUST AS BAD AS NAR SHADDAA DOWN THERE. WORSE, IF YOU GO DEEP ENOUGH."

V shuddered, "Yeah, I've heard the horror stories."

"THEY DON'T LIVE UP TO THE TRUTH," Smasher said. The nostalgic glee — as strange as it sounded — in his voice was unmistakable. "THOSE WERE THE FRAGGIN' DAYS… THE GANGERS, THE BEASTIES, THE URBAN HELLSCAPE, THE CONSTANT, ALL-CONSUMING, FRAGGIN' VIOLENCE… AND I WAS ALL MEAT BACK THEN. SURVIVAL WAS A STRUGGLE. ONE I TOOK TO LIKE BREATHING. I WAS BORN TO THAT HELL. FOR THE LONGEST TIME, I THOUGHT I'D DIE THERE."

As Kento and his kid worked on them, V listened, damn near enthralled by the tale of Smasher's youth and origins. His 'MEAT' days. The kid was listening in as well, trying to make it seem like he wasn't as he toiled over Smasher's chrome. Kento remained as professional as ever, prepping V for the installation of her new bio-pump without disrupting anything else. But even for him, V could see well-hidden interest in Smasher's story.

"What were they like? Those 'meat' days?" V asked. "Hell? Something — somehow — worse…?"

"ONE WORD," Smasher rumbled. "FIGHT. EVERYTHING WAS A FIGHT. FIGHTING FOR FOOD AND WATER. FIGHTING FODDER WHO THOUGHT THEY DESERVED WHAT WAS MINE. FIGHTING FOR A SIMPLE NIGHT'S SLEEP AND FIGHTING FOR MY RIGHTFUL PLACE ON TOP. I FOUGHT FOR EVERYTHING I HAD AND EVERYTHING I WANTED. NEEDED. IT WAS A TINY, INSIGNIFICANT SLICE OF THE GALAXY. BUT I MADE IT MINE.

"MY KINGDOM, EARNED THROUGH SHEER VIOLENCE. THE PUNKS UNDER ME WERE NOTHING SPECIAL. BUT I WAS THE ONE LEADING THEM, SO WE CLEANED HOUSE. MADE A WHOLE LEVEL DEEP UNDER THE SENATE DISTRICT OUR OWN. WE WERE LORDS OF SCRAP AND SHIT. WHEN THAT'S ALL YOU KNOW, YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE ON TOP OF THE WORLD.

"THE CIVILIZED SECTIONS OF THE UNDER-LEVELS WERE DOMINATED BY GANGS AND GANGERS. JUST LIKE NIGHT CITY. JUST LIKE EVERY OTHER URBAN HELL I'VE BEEN TO. THE SETTING CHANGES BUT THE PLOT STAYS THE SAME. DRUGS. GUNS. TURF. MONEY. POWER. THE USUAL WORKS.

"ON CORUSCANT, THEY WERE THE LEAST OF DANGERS. SURVIVING OTHER PEOPLE WAS EVERYDAY SHIT. SURVIVING THE ENVIRONMENT WAS WORSE. CORUSCANT'S UNDER-LEVELS HAVE A MIND OF THEIR OWN. IT'S A WEB. A LABYRINTH. CONSTANTLY SHIFTING. CONSTANTLY STRIVING TO KILL ANYONE WHO CALLS IT HOME. THERE'S NO SYMPATHY FOR THE LIVING THERE. EVEN THE BEASTIES CAN FEEL IT."

"I'm going to regret asking this, but…" V hesitated for a brief moment. "What… do you mean…?"

Smasher paused, seemingly to consider the question, before grunting, "… EXAMPLE, THEN. THIS SHIT WAS COMMON. CORUSCANT HAD… WHAT ARE THEY CALLED? WIRE WORMS?"

"Conduit Worms, yeah," V nodded. "They're common enough elsewhere, too. Pests that live in electrical wiring and feed off electricity. So long as there's electricity flowing, they'll find their way there eventually."

"THEY WERE FRAGGIN' EVERYWHERE ON CORUSCANT. PUNCH ANY WALL, AND YOU'LL FIND A WIRE WORM. ONLY, THEY DIDN'T STAY THERE. DURING BLACKOUTS, THE POWER OBVIOUSLY CUTS OFF. BUT THE WIRE WORMS ARE STILL HUNGRY. CORUSCANT'S BREED MUST BE SPECIAL 'CAUSE THEY'D GO LOOKING FOR ELECTRICITY. HUNTING… TURNS OUT THAT THE SAPIENT BRAIN IS A GOOD ENOUGH SOURCE FOR THEM TO FEED ON. THE LIGHTS WOULD GO OUT FOR A NIGHT, AND THE NEXT MORNING, HALF OF YOUR NEIGHBORS WOULD WAKE UP WITH WORMS IN THEIR BRAINS."

V gaped in horror, "No karkin' shot…! That- That shouldn't be possible! Conduit Worms are basically stationary once they settle in a wire! I've never-! Oh, Stars, that's horrifying!"

Smasher just snorted, "BEASTIES WANT TO LIVE TOO. JUST LIKE ANY OTHER MEAT. LIKE THERE'S SOME KIND OF INHERENT RIGHT TO LIFE IN THE GALAXY. BULLSHIT. BUT AT LEAST BEASTIES KNOW TO FIGHT FOR THAT SHIT TOOTH AND CLAW. IN SOME PLACES, THE BEASTIES WERE A GANG ALL THEIR OWN. ONLY INSTEAD OF DRUGS, GUNS, AND MONEY, THEY CARED ABOUT MEAT, MEAT, AND MORE MEAT. FIGHTIN', FUCKIN', EATIN'. IT'S A MORE HONEST WAY TO LIVE."

"You would say that," V sighed. "It makes sense in a way. A primal way… And I thought Night City was bad…"

"IT'S THE SAME. MOSTLY," Smasher growled out an explanation. "NIGHT CITY DOESN'T HAVE THE SAME BEASTIES, BUT IT HAS BIGGER PLAYERS IN THE GAME. CORUSCANT'S UNDER-LEVELS WERE… INSULATED FROM THE WIDER GALAXY. IT'S THE CENTER OF THE GALAXY, SURE, BUT ALL OF THAT SHIT HAPPENS IN THE TOP THOUSAND LEVELS. EVEN THE UNDERWORLD POWER GAMES SHIT. NOTHING DOWN THERE IS WORTH GOING ANY LOWER FOR THE HUTTS, BLACK SUNS, PYKES, OR WHATEVER OTHER GALACTIC SYNDICATE.

"NOT WORTH IT FOR THE CORPS, EITHER, 'CAUSE THERE'S RARELY PROFIT TO BE MADE DOWN THERE. AND DEFINITELY NOT WORTH IT FOR THE REPUBLIC, EVEN IF WE LIVED IN THEIR FUCKIN' BASEMENT. THE UNDER-LEVELS WERE A WHOLE WORLD TO THEMSELVES — BOXED IN, SUPPRESSED, AND IGNORED WHILE THE CORE OF REPUBLIC POWER THRIVED DIRECTLY OVERHEAD."

"How in every Corellian Hell did you make it out of there…?" V just about whispered, the sheer odds stacked against Smasher truly setting in.

"SIMPLE," Smasher grunted bluntly. "I DIDN'T. SOMEONE UP ABOVE STARTED FEELING PECKISH OR SOME SHIT. DON'T KNOW, DON'T CARE. BUT SINCE I WAS RIGHT BENEATH THE SENATE DISTRICT, JEDI WIPED OUT MY GANG. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO SURVIVE. WENT SOLO FOR REAL AFTER THAT. NOTHING CHANGED. EVEN BACK THEN, ALL I NEEDED WAS MYSELF TO FUCK SHIT UP.

"MAYBE IF THE REPUBLIC HAD AN ACTUAL ARMY, IT WOULD'VE BEEN DIFFERENT. TOUGH. THEY MISSED OUT ON ADAM FUCKING SMASHER. I ROAMED ALONE. FOUGHT. FUCKED. AND FOUND MYSELF WITH A REPUTATION. WIPE OUT A FEW GANGS HERE AND THERE, AND MEAT-FUCKS START TO GET SCARED. I COULDN'T FIND A GOOD FIGHT IN MY OLD STOMPING GROUNDS ANYMORE, SO I WENT DEEPER.

"KILLED EVERYTHING I CAME ACROSS. MOSTLY BEASTIES. DURACRETE SLUGS, CORRIDOR GHOULS, A WHOLE TRIBE OF CTHON… BAREHAND BOXED A CORUSCANI OGRE ONCE. CRACKED ITS MUTATED SKULL OPEN WITH A SUPLEX. KILLED A TAOZIN, TOO-…"

"Hold on! The taozin are extinct!" V exclaimed in shock, pausing and then eagerly asking. "… What was it like?"

"LIKE KILLING A KRAYT DRAGON. ONLY UGLIER. AND BUG-GIER. JUST AS DANGEROUS… BUT I'M ADAM FUCKING SMASHER. A WAY OVERGROWN SPIDER-SHRIMP COULDN'T KILL ME IN ITS DREAMS. ATE BUG MEAT FOR A WHOLE YEAR AFTER."

"… That's pretty nova," V admitted. "Still, doesn't explain how you 'didn't make it out', as you said."

"I'M GETTIN' THERE. MY REPUTATION FOLLOWED ME AS I WENT BACK UP. THE CRACKED OGRE SKULL ON MY BELT AND TAOZIN SHELL ARMOR MIGHT'VE HELPED. EARNED ME A GIG IN THE UPPER LEVELS WHEN ARASAKA CAME CALLING. THE TEAM THEY STUCK ME WITH FUCKED UP. EVEN AFTER SACRIFICING ALL OF 'EM, I WAS MULCHED BY TWO ROCKETS. ARASAKA PICKED UP THE PIECES OF ME, STUCK ME IN A BIOPOD, AND BORG-ED ME UP. ONCE I EXPERIENCED METAL, I NEVER LOOKED BACK. 100 YEARS ON, AND I'D DO IT ALL AGAIN IN A MEAT-BEAT."

V blinked, "Kriff, that's how you ended up full-borg? 'Mulched' you say…?"

"TO FRAGGIN' SHREDS, I SAY…" Smasher rumbled out more confirmation.

"What were your original specs, then?"

"MODDED SAMSON. FAST ENOUGH TO LAP A MAIN BATTLE TANK AND BENCHPRESS ONE, TOO. CYBERMATRIX REACTIVE BODY PLATING. MORE SENSORS THAN A STARSHIP. THAT WAS A GOOD FRAME," Smasher mused. "SIMPLE. NO-NONSENSE. STRONG ENOUGH TO CARRY EVERY GUN I NEEDED AND THEN SOME. 'COURSE THERE WAS ALWAYS ROOM TO IMPROVE."

"Of course," V deadpanned.

"USED A DAIONI FRAME FOR SOME OF 'SAKA'S HEAVY MISSIONS. THAT BABY… WELL, I'M MAN ENOUGH TO ADMIT WHEN I FALL IN LOVE. NOT WITH MEAT, OF COURSE. BUT THAT CHROME AND BESKAR BABY? OH, YEAH~… SHE STILL OWNS MY HEART. SURVIVED A NUKE IN THAT BABY. NOTHING COULD STOP ME. EVEN MORE SO THAN USUAL, THAT IS."

"You… survived a nuke…?" V tried her best not to goggle. By the amused tilt of Smasher's head, she didn't manage it very well.

Smasher chuffed. There was a certain hostility in his words, but it was dampened by his current amusement, "JUST A LITTLE ONE, UNFORTUNATELY. FRAGGIN' BLACKHAND… COULDN'T EVEN DO ME THE FAVOR OF USING SOMETHING HEAVY."

"I'd say any nuke is still 'something heavy', Smasher!" V didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She settled on yelling. Yelling helped.

Smasher shrugged, "AT LEAST I WRECKED SHAITAN. AND MURDERED THE SHIT OUT OF SILVERHAND. DECENT FIGHTER, SHAITAN. SILVERHAND, NOT SO MUCH. JUST A PUMPED-UP ROCKER EGOTIST WITH AN ADMITTEDLY NICE HAND CANNON. EVEN WORKING TOGETHER, THEY WEREN'T ENOUGH TO STOP ADAM FUCKING SMASHER. SHAITAN'S STILL KICKIN' AROUND, THOUGH. SO IS… BLACKHAND. I JUST KNOW HE IS. THAT MEAT-FUCKER WILL BE OLD AS SHIT BY NOW. BUT I'M NOT GONNA LET HIM EAT DIRT FROM OLD AGE."

"Smasher…" V stared. "Blackhand has to be, like, 90 years old…"

"THAT WON'T STOP MORGAN KARKING BLACKHAND…" Was that a grumble from Smasher? It certainly sounded like a grumble. V wasn't suicidal enough to call it a pout, even in the safety of her mind.

She stifled a grin, but only barely, "Okay, that's your meat frame, your first frame, and your nuke-surviving frame. I think I'm starting to believe that most of the galaxy can't touch 'Adam Fucking Smasher'. What about this one?"

"THIS ONE IS MOSTLY KENTO'S WORK," Smasher nodded in acknowledgment.

Kento didn't even look up from where he was precisely cutting into V's side, bowing anyway, "It is always an honor to work on a warrior such as yourself, Smasher-sama. Your modified Dragoon is my masterpiece. My best work."

"HEAR THAT, GREEN MEAT? DON'T FUCK UP AND RUIN YOUR UNCLE'S PERFECTION," Smasher warned the boy still working on his upkeep.

Shoto just about jumped right out of his skin, "H-Hai, Smasher-sama!"

"Stop toying with the kid," V sighed. "What are we looking at here? With your Dragoon, I mean. Specs and shit?"

She could practically hear the smirk in Smasher's voice as he replied, "THE BETTER QUESTION IS 'WHAT AREN'T WE LOOKING AT?'…"

Kento nodded, explaining, "Smasher-sama's Dragoon has everything his previous frames had and more. An intricate and complex sensor suite — visual light, NV, UV, radar, radio, auditory, top-of-the-line Tametomo targeting, and comm-warfare system as well. Strength, speed, and stamina to match anything but his DaiOni frame. Jumpboosters for vertical and horizontal mobility. ICE and Black ICE. Weapon mounts for anything from concussion missiles to stun blasters. Fully articulated hands so he can carry even more. A Sandevistan, of course, and a fully functional regeneration system. I am… proud of my work."

"DAMN STRAIGHT, YOU ARE. SHOULD BE, TOO. THIS FRAME HAS SERVED ME WELL. IT'S NOT MY ONI BABY. BUT IT'S DAMN CLOSE," Smasher chuckled.

"Stars…" V exhaled. "That's some heavy chrome. Pretty sure only half of that is in your files, Smasher."

"NAH," Smasher grunted. "JUST THAT, EVEN WORKING WITH ME, YOU ONLY HAVE CLEARANCE FOR MOST OF IT. IF KENTO HADN'T TOLD YOU HIMSELF, YOU NEVER WOULD'VE HEARD ABOUT MY BLACK ICE AND THE TAMETOMO, COMM-WARFARE, AND REGEN SYSTEMS. SAME WITH MOST OF MY MISSIONS IN THIS FRAME. MY HANDLERS GET JUST AS MUCH CLEARANCE AS THEY NEED TO DO THEIR JOB. ANYTHING MORE, THEY HAVE TO WORK FOR."

"And I've started earning more clearance now?" V asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"YOU'VE KEPT UP WITH ME THIS FAR. YOU HAVEN'T SHOWN ANY SIGNS OF SLOWING DOWN. YOU'RE ONLY MOSTLY MEAT," Smasher grunted. "YEAH, YOU'RE EARNING SOME MORE."

V considered that for a moment, "… I suppose I can live with that. Especially if you tell me some feats to back up those specs. I wanna hear about this shit in action. Shock me fraggin' speechless, Smasher."

"I MANAGE LOOSE ENDS THESE DAYS. YOU'VE SEEN MOST OF THAT," Smasher said. "ARASAKA SENDS ME IN WHEN THEY NEED SHIT DEAD AND DESTROYED. I LET THEM KEEP ME ON A LEASH 'CAUSE THEY NEVER HAVE A SHORTAGE OF MEAT FOR THE SLAUGHTER. BEFORE SETTLING HERE IN THE NIGHT CITY HQ, THEIR MISSIONS SENT ME ALL OVER THE GALAXY. THE HANDLERS BEFORE YOU COULDN'T HANG. I WENT THROUGH A HUNDRED OF THEM IN HALF AS MANY MONTHS BEFORE THEY STUCK ME WITH YOUR ASS, V."

"Oh, yeah? What makes me so different?" V couldn't help but ask.

Red eyes stared at her for a moment, "… YOU CAN ACTUALLY KEEP UP. YOU GET YOUR HANDS DIRTY RIGHT THERE WITH ME. YOU'RE A MONSTER IN THE MAKING. LIKE ME. I'M NOT DYING. EVER. BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T PASS DOWN A KILLING LEGACY. YOU'VE GOT, HNG… POTENTIAL."

"Right, well, don't go all meat mushy on me, Smasher," V joked.

"… CALL ME MEAT AGAIN, AND I'LL BE CONTRACTUALLY OBLIGATED TO SMASH YOU."

"Yeah, yeah, you're always contractually obligated to smash me if you feel the urge," V waved dismissively. "Just tell me about your missions already, old man."

"PLUCKY FUCKIN' DESCENDANTS…" Smasher grumbled. "NOT MUCH TO TELL. 'SAKA SENDS ME. I RAGE, KILL, AND DESTROY. SALT THE EARTH. BURN EVERYTHING. THEN, I COME BACK AND WAIT FOR THE NEXT ONE. PREEM VIOLENCE, FUCK BUREAUCRACY, YOU ALREADY KNOW THE DRILL."

"I do," V chuckled. "Impossible to miss it when working as your handler. I'm looking for specifics, Smasher. Enemies or targets. References for scale. You're a fucking monster. But how monstrous…?"

"HNG… BEEN SENT AGAINST THE TRADE FEDERATION AND TECHNO UNION A FEW TIMES. THEIR DROIDS ARE FUCKING JOKES. BAD JOKES. DROIDIKAS ARE AS PATHETIC AS B1S. THEIR ASSASSIN DROIDS ARE… STIFF AS FUCK. 'OVERWHELM WITH NUMBERS', BULLSHIT. THEY COULD DROWN ME IN THOSE POOR EXCUSES FOR METAL, AND I'D STILL CLAW MY WAY OUT WITHOUT POPPING A SERVO. EVERY LUCREHULK I'VE BEEN IN, I BLEW THE FUCK UP. ALL-CONSUMING DESTRUCTION IS THE ONLY REASON THOSE JOBS ARE EVEN SEMI-SATISFYING.

"AND- HNG… ARASAKA HAD A STAKE IN THE MANDO CIVIL WAR 20+ YEARS BACK. MANDOS ARE… FINE. GOOD ARSENAL OF HEAVY IRON. ACTUAL ARMOR. DECENT ENOUGH CHALLENGE FOR MEAT. IF THEY COME AT ME IN 10-MAN SQUADS, THAT IS. THAT JANGO CUNT IS DECENT FIGHTING MEAT, THOUGH. I'D KILL NEXT TO HIM AGAIN IF THE CHANCE PRESENTED ITSELF."

"The best bounty hunter in the galaxy… is 'decent' by your standards," V deadpanned.

"I SAID WHAT I FUCKING SAID," Smasher glared. "I ACTUALLY LIKE THAT CUNT. BUT HE'D HAVE TO TRY HIMSELF TO DEATH TO BEGIN SCRATCHING ME."

"What about-? What's his name? The other bounty hunter people say is the best. The one who's only whispered about?"

"KARKING DURGE… THERE'S A REAL FRAGGIN' CHALLENGE. FUCKER BARELY EVEN COUNTS AS MEAT. HE'S MEAT, YEAH. BUT XENO MEAT… THE ONE TIME WE FOUGHT, I LEFT HIM A MASS OF REGENERATING TENTACLES. AND HE LEFT ME AS SCRAP… 'SAKA HAD TO SEND A RECOVERY TEAM TO PULL ME OUT. STILL SURVIVED, THOUGH. SAME FOR DURGE. WE'LL MEET AGAIN. NEXT TIME, I'LL CARRY A NUKE AND ROCK MY ONI BABY."

"Right…" V shuddered slightly when she thought of the stories she'd heard of Durge and then compared them to what she knew about Smasher. "Yeah, you couldn't pay me to fight that fucker straight up."

"SMART," Smasher grunted. "YOU'RE BETTER FROM THE BACK OR SIDES ANYWAY. BLITZING FROM THE SHADOWS. GLASS CANNON-LOOKIN' ASS…"

V shrugged, "They can't see me, they can't shoot me. They can't shoot me; they're already dead."

Smasher barked a harsh, digital noise like a laugh, "IF IT WORKS, IT FRAGGIN' WORKS. YOU AREN'T ME, V. DON'T TRY TO BE."

"Wasn't planning on it," V smirked. "I've got my own style of slaughter."

As she said that, Kento was finishing up with her. The hole in her side was patched right back up as if it was never even there. A new piece of chrome now sat inside her. V stretched as Kento backed away and went to check how his nephew had done with Smasher. If ripperdoc talent ran in the family, the kid couldn't have done too badly, V thought. She flexed the newest chrome muscle in the back of her mind, feeling a trickle of bacta being pumped into her veins. Yeah, Kento did very good work.

"Right, one last question," V said, addressing Smasher. "What about the Jedi?"

Smasher glowered at thin air as Kento checked him over, "FOUGHT A FEW. KILLED MOST. PROBABLY ON A LIST IN THEIR BIG, FANCY-ASS TEMPLE. ONE OF THEM COST ME MY ORIGINAL SAMSON FRAME, ACTUALLY. FRAGGIN' FORCE CUNT. JEDI BIG SHOT OR SOMETHING, 'CAUSE HE'S THE MASTER OF THE WHOLE DAMN ORDER NOW. 'COURSE, HE WAS GREEN AS SHIT WHEN I FOUGHT HIM."

"Master of the Order… Windu…?" V guessed, checking the Arasaka records she had downloaded on her cyberdeck as she did. "Yeah, Windu. Damn, that's a track record and a half… You fought this guy? And he… beat you…?"

"JEDI CHEAT," Smasher grunted. "WINDU CHEATS THE HARDEST. I HADN'T LEARNED TO CHEAT EVEN HARDER BACK THEN. I DISARMED HIM OF HIS LIGHTSABER. BUT THEN, AS I WAS MOVING IN FOR THE KILL, THE FORCE CUNT JUST STARTED BARE-KNUCKLE BOXING ME. HE HIT EVERY WEAK SPOT ON MY FRAME LIKE HE COULD SEE THEM. FUCKING DISMANTLED ME BY THE SCREWS AND BOLTS WHILE USING HIS FISTS LIKE THEY WERE HYDROSPANNERS. SHIT WAS… TOUGH. I'LL ADMIT IT."

V blinked, "It almost sounds like you respect him."

"HE BARE-KNUCKLE FUCKING BOXED. A FULL-BORG. EVEN I CAN'T HATE THAT SHIT," Smasher admitted. "WON'T STOP ME FROM RETURNING THE FAVOR. AS FAR AS FIGHTS GO, HE'S UP THERE WITH DURGE AND SHAITAN FOR ME."

"Not Blackhand~?" V teased.

"FUCK MORGAN KARKING BLACKHAND UP THE ASS WITH HIS OWN FUCKING HAND," Smasher growled right back.

V couldn't help but laugh, "Fair enough, Smasher. Fair enough."

She stood and stretched. At the same time, Smasher finally got the green light from Kento. Eight feet of full-borg stood with V. Kento bowed to them as V thanked him (and Smasher grunted an acknowledgment, more than almost anyone got from him). As they made to leave, Shoto bowed even deeper, looking like he was going to tip straight-… yep, there he went.

V chuckled as they left the lab, checking her comms as they reconnected outside the Faraday cage. She spoke and read for a moment, hoping to taunt Smasher with one last parting remark, "You know~… To me, it sounds like there are three people in the galaxy who can 'bother' Adam Fucking-…"

"FINISH THAT SENTENCE AND I PUNCH YOU THROUGH THESE REINFORCED WALLS."

"Alright, alright," V raised her hands in surrender, smirking. "We've got a new task, anyway. Remember that meat kid you glared down? Apparently, he and his crew just took over a whole Hutt cartel."

"RRGN. PROMISING."

"The execs want us to test his metal. Or should that be flesh, since he's 'ganic…? Either way, he's rising quickly, and the execs want some kind of relationship in place as he does. I knew that whole situation was sus… But we aren't paid to ask questions. We're cleared to fight, not kill, but-… hold on, that can't be right…"

"NN?"

"This… The usual paperwork parameters are… reversed…? It says that you're supposed to be the handler for this task… and I'm the asset."

"COMBAT OR HONEYPOT?"

"H-Huh...?"

"FIGHTING OR FUCKING? SHAKE OFF YOUR SHOCK, V-BRAT."

"Uh, yes…? Any means necessary to establish some kind of ties. Mostly, it just says that I'm supposed to be doing the fieldwork this time around, and you're… handling me…"

Smasher had no mouth, but V could swear she saw him grin anyway, "BOTH, THEN. I'M IN CHARGE. ON PAPER FOR ONCE, TOO. CHANGE OF PACE, BUT THE KID WON'T BE READY FOR ME ANYWAY JUST YET. WE'LL LET HIM COOK AND 'TASTE-TEST' WITH YOU FIRST. I WAS RIGHT. THIS IS… PROMISING."