Lost and Longing.

Ahsoka gasped and jumped backward at the sudden appearance of the chair, unfortunately, as she was leaning against a table at the time of the conjuration, she quite literally tumbled backward over it and sprawled onto the floor, her limbs askew.

She scrambled around and righted herself after a moment and peered over the table at the chair. Seeing it was still there, she hesitantly came around the table, stepping over the books she had knocked down. She was glancing back and forth between Harry whose expression was calm and curious, and the chair he conjured. She moved over to lightly hesitantly reach out and touch the chair to verify that it actually was there.

It was completely solid.

When she glanced up at Harry in disbelief, she saw an infinitely amused expression on his face.

"Take your time. We're in no rush. We have to still turn in that bounty and Minnie's getting the ship ready to launch." Harry said, though a bit of a wistful expression was crossing his face as he recalled his first interaction with magic.

Ahsoka was running her hands over the chair, squeezing it and turning it a bit, as if trying to figure out the trick. She finally turned and moved to sit in it, as if that was the ultimate barometer when she glanced at Harry uncertainly.

"Go ahead, I want you to fully understand and accept that the chair in front of you is real, and wasn't there a second ago." Harry encouraged.

Ahsoka slowly sat down and blinked as she found a comfortable chair that completely supported her weight. She was still shocked. She had walked through this space so it wasn't like he removed an illusion. She was actually sitting in a chair that hadn't existed earlier. There was no illusion. It was not a Jedi Mind trick, nor was it a hardlight hologram or a projection.

"How did you do that?!" She finally half asked, and half demanded incredulously.

Harry grinned and laughed, surprised to find that he was truly enjoying himself. "Magic." He replied.

"But… I felt you do that in the Force." Ahsoka replied.

Harry nodded a little bit. "You did, I'm really not surprised. If you're being truly technical about it, they're essentially the same thing… but my people's understanding and uses of Magic is far different from the norm throughout this galaxy."

"But, Magic?" Ahsoka repeated, unable to keep the doubt out of her voice.

"Yes, I'm well aware that your Jedi Council views all those societies who view "magic users" and possess self-proclaimed witches and wizards as backwater, primitive, and do their best to 'educate' them otherwise." Harry said with a trace of scorn in his own voice. "Heaven forbid people be allowed to believe what they want to believe." He shook his head, "I won't deny the people of my world could, at times, be described as terribly primitive. In terms of technological levels, before I left, the non-magic users were centuries behind even the most basic spacefaring users that are found throughout this galaxy."

Harry gestured at the chair Ahsoka was sitting in. "But in the use of Magic? We were easily centuries … if not millennia ahead of anything I've seen since I've arrived here. No matter what culture or place that I've visited."

Ahsoka frowned. "I've never heard of anyone try and measure the evolution of a society or group's use of the Force, it all seems to be by hyperspace speeds. In fact, I doubt the idea to do so would ever occur to most Jedi I know." Her tone was puzzled and thoughtful. "Well, that's one thing that's noticeable different about how Force users approach things than the people of my world." Harry replied, his speech taking on a slightly lecturing tone. "I can't entirely be certain, but I believe there are a number of reasons for that."

At Ahsoka's curious expression, Harry didn't hesitate at expanding on his point. "First, based on the History I've read, the Jedi have had at least five instances over the last seven thousand years where your entire order has been brought to damned near the brink of extinction. And if you read between the lines the number is probably higher if not for pure luck."

Harry's tone became more emphatic as he spoke on the topic. "Each time, knowledge was lost left right and center from each of those previous incarnations of your Order, or worse, not just lost but deliberately forbidden because "Oh this became a danger once, despite using it for the past thousand years, so… let's make it forbidden because we're weak-willed idiots."

"Each time, entire branches of research and techniques into 'the Force' were completely lost. So any hope of progress or development was stopped in it's tracks." Harry shook his head in disgust.

His eyes focused on her once more. "I've looked a little bit into how Jedi are trained. And… it rather disappoints me."

"What do you mean?" Ahsoka asked with a puzzled expression. "Most of what you're taught is simply philosophy, relevant to the particular group you serve, and really has no basis when it comes to you using Magic… or the Force or whatever you wanna call it." Harry said.

Seeing Ahsoka's confused expression turn to protest, Harry expanded his explanation slightly. "What I'm talking about simply is the ethics that your specific Orders, be it Jedi or Sith, expect you to follow."

"Truthfully, the bad… or 'loaded' words I'd use to describe that process are indoctrination or brain-washing; each group does to its initiates to ensure they behave a certain way." Harry said calmly, expecting a response. He was not disappointed. "The Jedi Order does not indoctrinate or brainwash it's padawans! The Sith are the ones that do that!" Ahsoka protested, her entire body tensing. If he hadn't lumped the Sith in there with the Jedi Ahsoka would be a lot more nervous, wondering if she had stumbled across a Sith.

Harry looked calm despite her outburst, and merely questioned quietly, his tone honestly curious. "Really? Would you mind a few questions then? And if I've understood wrong, I will apologize."

Ahsoka shook her head, Harry's calmness despite the sensitivity of the topic was putting her more at ease. Still, Harry sounded far too confident in the results of his questioning for her to relax completely "Okay, go ahead." "In your training, how much time did you focus on using 'the Force' and were you ever encouraged to explore new ways to use it?" Harry inquired.

"We spent a great deal of time learning to feel the Force, and learning how it could guide us. But… almost no time exploring new ways to use it." Ahsoka replied after a moment's thought.

"I want you to think about this for a second before you answer. Think and consider. How much of your training involved being reminded of how to act? How to think? How to not feel your emotions?" Harry asked quietly.

That question hung in the air as Ahsoka thought about it. Her response was on the tip of her tongue before she stopped and considered it. Her master hadn't harped so much on those lessons, but when she was a youngling, those had been the focus of the lessons, and she was well aware other initiates and padawans had more strict Masters who focused far more on those lessons.

In a small voice she replied. "I've heard it differs from Master to Master … and my master was a bit… different."

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