Chapter 24: Metagaming? by Noodlehammer
The third part of For Love of Magic this one takes place in wow Noodlehammer does amazing work as always
Words: 450k+
Links:
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/13701065/1/Metagaming
https://forum.questionablequesting.com/threads/16063
(Third in series, read prequels or be confused. Harry had spent his whole life wishing for magic to be more abundant, and that was precisely what he got. He wasn't even particularly upset about the many serious dangers inherent in such a thing, for what was life without challenge? The irony of ending up in Azeroth after all the references was a bit on the nose, though.)
Chapter 1: Moon Moon?
Alright, new fic AN.
Joe Lawyer continues to spare time to act as my beta and credit goes to him for helping to polish the fic up.
Additionally, Umodin has graciously agreed to act in an advisory capacity regarding Warcraft Lore, supplementing my own research and outdated knowledge.
Lastly comes the start-of-fic reminder that those of you wishing to throw money my way may do so on the adult section of Subscribe Star under "Noodlehammer".
EDIT: It has been pointed out to me that I never stated which fics were the prequels so this one, which could be confusing for anyone finding this first.
To clear it up, the series starts with "For Love of Magic" and continues in "A Discordant Note" Then comes here.
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Elune sensed her the moment she arrived, one with a powerful spiritual alignment to the moon.
The human woman was with two others, another woman who had a heart as dark as any demon and a man, a mighty mage that felt spiritually aligned with the sun.
The touch of divinity lingered about the man and the one that had caught her eye. Not demigods, but something else. They felt almost like they were simply separated from their power, a connection leading to it outside the borders of this reality.
She could do nothing for the man, nor was she inclined to do so after getting a sense for his wrought iron heart and overly clever mind, as they both reminded her far too much of the Highborne arcanists that had caused the Sundering of Azeroth, but she could do something for the woman.
Elune gently let her power seep into the human, taking care not to spook her. The woman, whose name she learned was – rather fittingly – Luna, put up no resistance as the Moon Goddess settled into her soul.
"Greetings and welcome to Azeroth." Elune said with a reassuring smile as they manifested inside Luna's soulscape, a feat only possible because the soul in question was awoken to its potential.
Luna stared at her with wide eyes, slowly tilting her head sideways.
Elune waited patiently, sensing that the mortal was trying to decide what to make of the situation.
"Big Sis!" Luna suddenly declared, lunging forward for a hug.
Elune could not even remember that last time she was surprised. Mortals were generally overawed when she made herself known to them. Most didn't even have the spiritual awareness to perceive her, Some were naturally guarded and rejected her before she could even attempt it. Even her high priestess, Tyrande, the one mortal to whom she was closest, was nothing but extremely formal and respectful. Her highest priesthood might call themselves the Sisters of Elune, but they didn't actually behave so familiarly with her or even with each other.
Suffice to say, being hugged and spontaneously declared as family was a little out of the norm.
Still, she sensed no ill intent whatsoever and decided to return the hug. Luna's almost childlike joy was rather endearing.
"Would you like to be my priestess on Azeroth, young one?" Elune offered.
Such a simple, honest soul was sure to do much good with the power.
"Will I have to dance naked around a bonfire on nights of the full moon?"
"No, that is not one of the rituals I require my priestesses to perform." The goddess assured.
"Aww…" Luna pouted in disappointment.
"You can still do it if you wish…?" Elune offered uncertainly, having some trouble figuring out this most peculiar mortal.
"I wonder if I can get Tyrande to dance with me?"
That would be quite a feat, as her High Priestess was a reserved and serious woman. But how did Luna even know of Tyrande in the first place? Elune was certain that she would find out eventually, so she decided to focus on more immediate matters. "As a fellow priestess, you just might be able to."
Luna leaned back to stare her in the eye for a moment. "Do you need help with something?"
Oh, and perceptive, too. This one was a gift indeed, and delivered right into her arms at that.
"I need help with many things." Elune admitted. Azeroth was plagued by countless evils, many of them unresolvable by any means other than violence, but it was against her nature to engage in combat of any sort. She could, however, empower those able and willing to fight.
"Okay, you can count on me, Big Sis!" Luna declared with such pure faith and conviction that Elune instantly knew she would be well suited to divine magic even without any prior connection to the moon.
"Thank you." The goddess smiled, leaning down to give her new priestess a kiss on the forehead, reigniting the mortal woman's connection to the spiritual aspect of the moon. "Now, let us do something about the mess you and your husband are in with those Sentinels."
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Harry knew that the only reason the tense standoff hadn't progressed to the stage of threats and/or demands was because the night elves were confused about the moon marking on Luna's forehead.
He had never played any of the Warcraft games, RTS not being his genre and the MMO being far too much of a time hog, so all his knowledge of the setting came from browsing websites in search of cool ideas to steal. Or sexy girls for Dora to morph into. And that was before his memory got a bit scrambled by his foray into godhood.
He did know, however, that Luna's punny little ornament was bound to be extremely similar if not identical to the iconography they used in their moon worshiping religion. That could either end up calming the situation down or escalating it to the point of violence, depending on how much of a hothead the commander of these Sentinels was.
The longer the standoff lasted, the better Harry figured their chances were of talking things out. Hopefully, because he would really rather not make enemies within ten minutes of their arrival.
Not least of all because these basic grunt soldiers all had a presence about on par with what a juvenile dragon would have on Earth, which was most likely a side effect of Azeroth's ludicrous magical density. Harry would bet that they could shrug off Killing Curses even without their obviously magical armor, as well as most other spells with conceptual alteration effects. Elemental spells, indirect kinetic damage, overwhelmingly strong non-elemental attack spells and various curses that ate away or bypassed magic resistance would be the way to go.
Then a very conspicuous beam of moonlight shone down on Luna and his statue-still wife opened her silver-blue eyes, which once again glowed with power like they did back when she was worshiped as a moon goddess.
But Azeroth already had one of those, didn't it?
The night elves were visibly taken aback and almost dropped their weapons in shock. Huh, guess they recognized the signs of divine favor.
"Hi! Err, Elune-Adore!" Luna chirped, addressing the Sentinels. "Could you please tell us how to get to the Emerald Sanctuary in Felwood? Big Sis Elune asked me to take care of something there."
'Big Sis Elune?' Harry and Adrastia mouthed to each other, not failing to notice the incredulous Sentinels doing the same thing.
"Ah, of course….Priestess?" The sentinel commander replied with deep, deep uncertainty.
"Thank you!" Luna beamed, inadvertently confirming her status.
"Luna, what the fuck did you do?" Harry asked, the demanding question coming out in a tone of long-suffering exasperation. "We literally just got here."
"Big Sis Elune asked if I wanted to be her priestess." Luna answered with a guileless smile. "She seemed nice, so I said yes." She added a few seconds later, as if the clarification was necessary.
"Of course you did." He sighed, because that was exactly like something she would do. Well, he supposed the Emerald Sanctuary – whatever that was – was as good a place to go from here as any.
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Jessir Moonbow was about to go mad with worry. She had been running late to a meeting with her friends, Arko'narin and the human paladin Trey Lightforge. When she finally arrived, it was to a message saying that they had gone ahead to scout out their location and that they would return to the Emerald Sanctuary in four days.
That had been six days ago.
Delays could happen, but she was terribly afraid that something had befallen them. She had been trying to put together a rescue party, but the Emerald Sanctuary had no combat-capable people to spare and there were no other adventurers passing through either. She was almost at the point where she was desperate enough to risk going alone, despite it being tantamount to suicide.
Then, as if in answer to her prayers, a sentinel flew in from Mount Hyjal, followed by a…cloud?
Jessir had to blink at that, wondering what kind of mad arcanist had managed to turn a cloud into a flying mount.
Ah, a human one. She thought when the three humans jumped off it, one man and two women.
The dark-skinned woman looked like a fairly average human and didn't seem like a fighter in her clearly luxurious robe, but the other two were definitely not normal. The man was almost as tall as a kaldorei male and had the build of a warrior, while the woman easily matched the height of a kaldorei female and…was marked by the moon?
The woman looked around as if searching for something and when her eyes locked with Jessir's, they lit up. She grabbed the man with her by the hand and dragged him forward.
"Hey!" The human called out with a bright smile. "Did you need help with something?"
Jessir might be baffled by this apparent human priestess of Elune, but she was also far too glad for the help to question it overmuch.
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Harry finished putting on his black dragonscale combat robe, the very same one he had worn before his first Odin impersonation. In hindsight, it had been a little foolish to make the dimensional jump not geared up for battle even if the Trans-dimensional Portal was set to deposit them in a place of relative safety.
Decades without a threat of any kind had a way of dulling one's edge and he simply wasn't paranoid enough to maintain his guard for that long.
"That seems a heavy garment for a mage." The night elf, Jessir, commented.
"Is there a rule that says mages can't use heavier armor?" Harry asked back, amused. He knew that the game didn't allow casters to use anything but cloth armor, but realistically speaking, that was stupid.
"No, but most seem to prefer lighter armor." She admitted.
"Hmph." He let that disdainful noise convey his opinion on the matter. "Alright, let's get going."
"Right!" Luna nodded firmly. She had her own dragonscale robe, made from the shed scales of Creampuff, a dragon with white scales, and adjusted for her generous chest.
Allowing Luna to choose dragon names unsupervised was a mistake.
"Is your friend not coming with us?" Jessir asked, gesturing towards Adrastia uncertainly.
"She's worse than useless in a fight." Harry waved off.
"Quite." Adrastia agreed drily. "I will stay here and talk to some people."
In other words, start getting a handle on the world.
Harry just nodded and jumped on the Nimbus Cloud, Luna following after and giving a hand to the night elf huntress and her wolf companion.
"This is a marvelous mount." Jessir commented shortly after they took off, crouching on the cloud and keeping a hand on her wolf to keep it from being blown off. Said wolf seemed to be enjoying itself, mouth open and tongue flapping in the wind.
"I'm glad you approve, now what can you tell me about our destination?"
"It used to be a druidic barrow den in ancient times, but now it has been taken over by orcish and Forsaken warlocks, whether they are part of the Horde or not is unknown."
Harry's mind stalled at the mention of the Forsaken. It took him a moment to recall what those were – sapient undead that had broken free of the Lich King's control.
This, of course, meant that they had previously not been free and were more than just mindless animated corpses, which meant that the continued existence of the Undead Scourge was anathema to him. His time spent in a state of pseudo-death while he was worshiped as a god of freedom and slave liberation had permanently altered his soul, which now compelled him to fight slavery wherever he encountered it. The Undead Scourge had to be destroyed.
Jessir didn't notice his record scratch moment and continued speaking. "Arko'narin, Trey Lightforge and I were supposed to root them out, but I was delayed in Darnassus by some personal business. Arko and Trey decided to scout ahead so that we could attack them better prepared, but I fear they were captured or killed in the attempt." Jessir was obviously hoping for the former.
"Aren't you the huntress of the group?" Harry asked pointedly, putting aside his new self-imposed mission for the moment. "Scouting seems like it should be your job."
"Indeed." Jessir said with a wince and said no more.
"Don't worry, we'll get your friends back." Luna assured, reaching out to rub the night elf's back.
"Thank you, Priestess." Jessit smiled wanly, then her expression turned to uncertain curiosity. "If you do not mind me asking, how is it that a human became a priestess of Elune?"
"Oh, Big Sis Elune asked if I wanted to be one and I said yes." Luna explained.
Jessir stared at her blankly for a few seconds and then turned to Harry, eyes full of questions. So many questions.
"Yeah, she has that effect on people." Harry commiserated and gestured ahead with his chin. "Are we there yet?"
Jessir turned her eyes back to the road and blinked in surprise. "Almost. The road should fork left here soon. Incredible, it would have taken us the better part of two days to traverse this distance on foot."
"It's good to be fast." Harry smirked and navigated the Nimbus down to the ground. "We'll approach from the ground from here on out."
A flight advantage was good, but the element of surprise was even better.
"Let me try something…" Luna said once they had their feet under them, placing her hands over Harry's eyes.
He let her do it, curious what she was up to. A small surge of magic later and the world became considerably brighter.
Harry blinked to adjust to his suddenly improved night vision, noting that it was superior to anything he could do with his own spells.
"A blessing from your new big sister?" He asked sardonically.
"Mhm!" She nodded with a bright smile.
"Heh." Harry shook his head and brought out his staff, not wanting to take any chances.
Jessir immediately balked at the sight of the boney object. "You are a necromancer?!" She hissed.
"Eh." He made a wishy-washy gesture with his hand. "Not really? I could raise some mindless undead if I really wanted to, I suppose, but I never saw the point."
That was a little white lie. He totally was a necromancer, but people tended to become terribly unreasonable once you told them that.
Jessir didn't seem to have registered the answer, staring at Luna's own bone staff. Clearly, the idea of a priestess of Elune using a stereotypical necromancer staff did not compute.
"B-but…" The bamboozled night elf stammered.
"Don't worry about it." Harry rolled his eyes. "We switched bodies about a century ago, the bones are from the originals. They make for excellent catalysts because they're saturated with our own magic."
Explaining this every time was going to get incredibly tedious, he could already see it.
"I see…" Jessir very obviously did not see.
"Look, you've fought undead before, right? Yes? Good, here." Harry's was tinged with exasperation as he practically shoved the staff into her hands. "What does it feel like?" Someone as blatantly magical as her should be able to sense something even if she wasn't a mage herself.
The huntress briefly fumbled before gingerly taking hold of the boney catalyst, frowning as she inspected it. "There is no foulness to it, it feels like any other mage staff. Very well, I believe you."
Of course there was no taint on it. As if Harry would be stupid enough to practice any kind of magic that could leave a taint without purifying himself afterwards.
With that bit of business done they crept forward through the brush, mostly quietly. Jessir and her wolf prowled like the experienced hunters they were, whereas Harry and Luna had to rely on raw experience rather than training. Still, it was enough to remain unnoticed.
"Over there, an orc." Jessir whispered, pointing ahead.
"A lookout." Harry surmised. "But… he's all by himself. That's either the sign of a trap or shitty organization."
"There are no others in the vicinity." Jessir replied with absolute confidence, her wolf chuffing quietly in agreement.
Harry decided to trust her on that. "Shitty organization, then. All the better for us."
"I can put an arrow through his throat from here." The night elf suggested darkly, already nocking an arrow.
"No, we want him alive." He refuted.
"An interrogation." The huntress realized. "I have just the thing…"
So did Harry, but he hadn't had the chance to test out how his spells worked on the natives and their absurdly magic-saturated bodies, so letting Jessir do her thing would be more reliable.
Once again, he mentally lamented Luna's insistence that they go on this 'quest' immediately. She had it in her head to help out this night elf after Elune asked her to and wouldn't be dissuaded. It was either go along with it or let her go alone, which was no choice at all.
So he did nothing but observe as Jessir pulled a small bottle from one of the pouches on her belt – which he could tell were rudimentary Bags of Holding – and applied its contents to an arrowhead. Poison, as magical as everything else seemed to be.
Given what he'd seen so far, Harry would be surprised if there was a single truly non-magical thing to be found anywhere on the planet.
Jessir let the arrow fly and struck the orc lookout right in the gut, where the armor between the torso and legs had a gap. The orc gave off a choked gasp before crumpling to the ground from rapid paralysis, too rapid to be the work of a natural poison.
Harry smirked at the choice of target. She could have gone for the exposed arms, but had decided on the far more difficult, and more importantly painful, gut shot instead. Somebody had a grudge against orcs.
The three of them advanced on the fallen greenskin and quickly dragged him off into some bushes. Harry wasted no time before grabbing his head, forcing eye-contact and ransacking his mind.
The structure of it was slightly alien, but close enough to a human's that he had little trouble navigating it. The natural defenses were good, but the orc himself was weak-willed. A few minutes later, he emerged with a deep frown on his face and met Jessir's wide eyes.
"You can read minds?" She asked neutrally, staring at the now braindead orc with a conflicted expression.
"Yes, and I have both some good news and a whole lot of bad news." Harry nodded.
"Good news first." Luna piped up.
"Your friends were taken captive and were still alive when he last saw or heard them, which was about half a day ago." Harry reported, gesturing down at the orc.
"And the bad news?" Jessir asked apprehensively.
"This isn't just a bunch of warlocks finding a convenient hole to hide in, but is in fact the headquarters of the Shadow Council on Azeroth. They're calling themselves the Jaedenar and they've been using this place to spearhead their efforts to spread demonic corruption through the Felwood and beyond." The mental invasion had also been good for some much needed context to freshen up his knowledge of the world. Good thing that these morons didn't seem to care much about operational security.
Huh, so that was how night elves paled. Interesting.
"Furthermore, there is a nathrezim Dreadlord lurking down at the bottom, most of the minions wandering around outside are random adventurers or travelers that have been brainwashed by succubi, including this one. One particular succubus, which seems to be their torturer, has spent the past couple of days focusing her attention on your paladin friend."
The orc hadn't actually seen what was happening to Trey, but he had heard it and gossiped about it.
Jessir was looking progressively more horrified with every bit of information and seemed about ready to be sick by the end. "What about Arko?"
"They haven't started on her yet. A satyr has apparently staked a claim on her, some pompous dickwaffle calling himself Prince Xavalis, and he seems to be getting a kick out of seeing if he can break her mentally before starting on the physical torture."
"Satyrs used to be night elves, but they sided with the Burning Legion during the War of the Ancients and became demons. They carry a great hatred for us." Jessir gnawed on her lip worriedly. "His intention may be to corrupt Arko into a satyr as well."
"We should hurry and save them." Luna said, sounding similarly worried.
"We cannot face a Dreadlord, even if it were alone." The night elf huntress said brokenly. "We would need to assemble a large force of Sentinels to have any hope of victory."
"We're doing it." Luna insisted. "Your friends need us."
"I've always wanted to kill a Dreadlord." Harry lied, because Luna was clearly going in there no matter what he said, so he might as well make himself sound cool. "We are a bit short on options, unfortunately. The area outside the Shadow Hold – which is what these cultists have renamed the barrow dens – is wide open and has very little cover, so picking them off one by one is not possible. Our only real option is to attack with overwhelming force, wipe out the fodder outside and then charge into the Shadow Hold itself before the warlocks and demons can swarm out of it and bring their numbers to bear."
"There are only three of us, we do not have overwhelming force!" Jessir hissed angrily, more at the situation than at him.
"I don't mean to brag, but I'm pretty damn powerful, and so is Luna." Harry countered casually. "Just stay to the back and pick off any stragglers while I do the bulk of the killing. Luna will cover us with protection magic."
"I can also do combat healing now." Luna piped up. "Healing is super effective here. I'm still getting the hang of it, but Elune is sticking around in my head for now to give advice, so we should be fine."
"I… yes, we can do this." Jessir gave herself a pep talk, voice becoming firmer and posture straightening. "With Elune on our side, we can win!"
I am feeling a mite disregarded. Harry observed amusedly, arching an eyebrow at the night elf's narrow-minded focus on her goddess. Usually he was the one that got people stirred up, not Luna, but if Jessir was any indication, the night elves were going to be in a collective tizzy over his wife's newly acquired position.
They kept their approach stealthy until they reached a sort of courtyard where a couple of dozen brainwashed Shadow Council mooks wandered around a corrupted moonwell. There was no more room for stealth, so they rushed in and started killing.
Harry found it…extraordinarily easy. Yes, the natives here all had an innate magic resistance, but that was more than offset by just how easy it was to cast spells. Normally, he had to override the laws of physical reality to impose his will on the world, which required both considerable willpower and careful construction of his spells to keep them from unraveling, but said laws just felt so dang malleable here. He barely had to exert any willpower at all, nor did the world attempt to unravel his spells.
And that wasn't even the end of it. Azeroth's very elements came to his aid eagerly, almost begging to be used against the demonic corruption.
Fire, water, wind, earth and lightning cut down the cultists and brainwashed enforcers with ease, leaving barely any work for Jessir and Luna.
A warlock showed up with an enslaved felhound at his side and Harry deliberately targeted the demon first so that its master would have time to cast a spell. A bolt of shadow magic flew at him, only to splash harmlessly against a shield Luna erected.
Harry was oddly disappointed. The shadow bolt felt weighty and would no doubt strike with some force if it hit, but it was an incredibly simplistic spell. Even without Luna's help, he could have pulled apart the magic holding it together in his sleep. There was no finesse to it at all, just a mass of volatile magic sent forth with intent to do harm.
He was starting to get an idea for how the use of magic had evolved on Azeroth. Since everyone had a high natural magic resistance, battle magic would have evolved in a direction more brutish than sophisticated to overcome it. This was no doubt compounded by just how easy magic was to use, which likely left most users no different in their approach than meatheaded barbarians swinging around oversized clubs.
This left Harry in a very good position, as he probably had a much better grasp on the workings of magic than all but the most prodigiously talented and dedicated.
Another couple of warlocks later they were entering the defiled barrow den, with a wide-eyed Jessir giving one last look at the carnage behind them. She had barely needed to fire off a shot. "What kind of arcanist are you? You shape your spells with the skill of an archmage, but you call the elements like a shaman."
"And why should I be unable to do both?" Harry asked back. "Specialization is for insects, not men."
"I want to purify that moonwell on the way back." Luna broke in, jogging to join them at the entrance.
"Me too." Harry was fully on board with the idea of purging demonic corruption from the world. While not one for righteous crusades, he was finding himself uncomfortable with the notion of sharing space with literal demons. Who woulda thunk it?
"Do you know where Arko and Trey are?" Jessir focused back on the task at hand as they advanced deeper into Shadow Hold.
"Their cages should be just ahead, but Trey spends most of his time deeper inside." Harry replied.
Jessir nodded and they continued their steady advance.
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When the sounds of battle drifted to Arko'narin's ears from the entrance to the defiled barrow den, her weary eyes lit up with hope for the first time in days. The only thing that had sustained her through this ordeal was the knowledge that Jessir was still out there and might be able to muster a rescue.
It was a faint, downright foolish, hope. After all, Jessir would have no idea that they had stumbled upon the Shadow Council's headquarters, but it was the only hope she had. It was better than thinking about the hunger from lack of food or cold from being stripped naked. It was better than focusing on the exhaustion from being unable to rest since their capture, or the constant ache of her body from sitting in a cramped cage, barely able to move. It was better than the humiliation of sitting in her own waste or imagining what torments Trey was suffering at the hands of that smug succubus and it was certainly better listening to the lurid descriptions of what the disgusting satyr prince was going to do to her.
So when she heard the sounds of battle, all of her focus fixed itself up towards the entrance, ignoring how the uncomfortable position hurt her neck.
"Friends of yours, wench?" Xavalis growled.
Arko ignored him and continued staring, pinning all the hope she had left on seeing Jessir arrive at the head of a force of Sentinels or powerful adventurers.
"They will die because of you." Xavalis continued. "Just like your paladin friend, they will be tortured and violated, and it will all be your fault!"
Arko tried not to listen, but the thought of Jessir suffering like Trey did if this rescue attempt failed filled her with dread.
Elune, please don't let it end that way. She begged desperately of her goddess.
A badly charred Forsaken body flew in, slid down the large wood ramp that served the purpose of stairs in barrow dens and finally came to rest not far from Xavalis.
The Satyr sneered disdainfully at it and turned his gaze upward just as a human of all things stepped through.
Arko wondered if the exhaustion and lack of sleep was making her hallucinate. The human was a bit on the short side for a kaldorei male, but very large for his kind. More importantly, he was toting a staff made of bone, much of the shaft bearing distinct spinal ridges and topped with a skull carved with arcane symbols. Clearly a necromancer of some power, but the almost cheerful grin on his face was in sharp contrast to the typically grim and dour death mages.
A woman entered behind him, golden-haired and of a height matching a kaldorei female. She also bore a staff made of bone that marked her as a necromancer, but Arko could never mistake the moon marking on her forehead or the distinct moonlight glow in her eyes, brighter than the natural radiance of kaldorei pupils. A priestess of Elune… who was human… and possibly a necromancer. What?
In her bafflement, she almost didn't notice her friend.
"Arko!" Jessir cried out in relief upon spotting her.
"Jessir!" Arko croaked back despite her parched throat, almost bursting into tears from sheer relief. She was being saved.
"Necromancer, what business have you with the Shadow Council?" Xavalis demanded.
"Huh? Did that goat just talk to me?" The human male feigned shock.
True to the short-tempered nature of his kind, Xavalis snarled in outrage and launched himself forward with claws outstretched. His incredibly powerful legs gave him the ability to leap forward and close the distance almost instantaneously.
And he would have, were it not for a barrier of pure moonlight appearing to protect his target, causing Xavalis to bounce off painfully.
Before he could recover, a whip of crackling lightning appeared in the human's hand and he swung it as if it were an actual whip. The pure elemental weapon wrapped around the stunned satyr and tightened, pinning his limbs.
Then the human grinned maliciously and the whip flared bright with power, causing Xavalis to convulse and scream, his red fur smoking and skin charring. It looked like a torturous way to die.
Arko was happy to see the vile wretch get what he deserved.
Soon after her cage was unlocked, but all she could do was fall out of it, every cramped muscle in her body screaming in pain after days of being stuck in that uncomfortable crouching position.
"Arko!" Jessir shouted in worry, but the fallen night elf could only close her eyes against the sheer humiliation of being seen like this by not only her friend, but also by the people she had recruited to save her.
A gentle hand was laid on her back and healing energies poured into her body, soothing the accumulated hurts of the last few days and washing away some of the exhaustion.
"Thank you, Priestess." Arko said sincerely after getting off the ground with Jessir's aid. She could figure out all the other incongruities of the situation later, for now the important part was that Elune had sent aid, whatever form it took.
"Call me Luna." The human woman smiled.
Even her name was close to the goddess.
"Harry, can you clean her up?" Luna requested, looking at her companion.
The human male, Harry, simply nodded and made a circular gesture with his fingers. A miniature thundercloud formed in the air, complete with tiny lightning strikes. Then a torrential downpour issued forth from it… or it would be a torrential downpour if it covered more than three square feet.
Arko and Jessir both gawked at the feat, recognizing a form of druidic nature manipulation when they saw it.
"You are a druid as well?" Jessir asked numbly.
"I told you, specialization is for insects." Harry replied before turning to Arko and extending a hand with a familiar white bar resting in his palm. "Soap?"
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Judging by how thoughtlessly casual the formerly captive night elf was about scrubbing herself right in front of him, Harry figured that their society didn't have much in the way of nudity taboos.
Well, at least Luna's antics wouldn't shock them too badly.
He took a few seconds to appreciate the show before gesturing for Luna to come with him. She nodded quietly and they made their way out of the side chamber that apparently served as the jail in the Shadow Hold.
Why it was so close to the exit instead of deeper inside to lower the risk of escape – to say nothing of why they kept the prisoner's gear right next to their cages – remained a mystery. He could only hope that this level of stupidity was the norm for demons.
"She's not going to be combat ready without a long rest and a few good meals, is she?" Harry asked quietly, peering down the tunnel that led deeper into the barrow den.
"Nope." Luna confirmed. "I fixed the muscle cramps, but I can't do much about the starvation and exhaustion."
Giving her something to eat right away wasn't a good idea either, as it would just make her feel even more tired as her body rerouted energy towards digestion.
"I guess it'll be just you and me, then." He quirked a smile at his wife. "Just like the old days."
"I don't think we ever went up against demons." Luna frowned thoughtfully.
"Speaking of demons, I wonder how Adrastia is doing?"
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"Excuse me, may I impose upon you for a moment?" Adrastia asked, using every trick of body language, voice tone and facial expression she knew to subtly signal sexual availability.
The night elf either didn't catch it on account of racial differences, wasn't interested, had an incredible poker face or signaled his own interest in ways that didn't make sense to her.
"How can I help you?" He asked politely.
This being the second night elf male to not react was very frustrating to Adrastia, but she didn't let it show. "I was hoping to learn more about your people. Would you indulge my curiosity?"
"I can spare a little time." He nodded.
"Thank you." She smiled at him brilliantly, the kind of smile that had left scores of men hopelessly besotted. For a moment, she was sorely tempted to reach out with her aura as well, but caution held her back.
Nothing, no reaction at all. That… made her kind of angry. She was going to need to study night elf females to see how this species mated.
XXXXX
"Elune doesn't like her." Luna revealed.
"You don't say?" Harry deadpanned.
"How are you going to keep her busy?"
"I have some ideas."
While most of his attention was on the here and now, a corner of his mind was already churning away at the problem of the Scourge and the Burning Legion.
Neither of those two could be handled with subtle long distance manipulation, social engineering, political maneuvering, cultural pollution or religious exploitation. Only violence would do the trick. Abandoning the cause wasn't an option either. Even if his very soul didn't compel him to destroy the abomination that was the Undead Scourge, he was far too fascinated by Azeroth to leave it now.
Harry's knowledge of the plot of the Warcraft series was extremely bare bones, but with the unwilling aid of that orc lookout earlier, he had narrowed down the timeframe to some point early on in World of Warcraft. That meant that the Horde and the Alliance were already fully established and glaring at each other suspiciously while they fended off the threats bearing down on them.
If Harry was an agent of the Burning Legion, he would find a way to set off that powder keg. It would be stupidly easy to do and, given the supposed cunning of these nathrezim, they probably had agents working towards just that goal. Adrastia could be put to work rooting them out.
The quiet rattle of armor announced the arrival of the two night elf women from the side alcove that the Shadow Council had repurposed into a jail.
Harry noted with some approval that Arko wore a suite of plate and chain. The breastplate was still made to conform to her boobs, but he figured that the magical nature of the armor probably worked around that design flaw. It definitely wasn't as good as the stuff the Sentinels wore, but it wasn't bad.
In her hands she held a two-handed longsword that glowed with Light… or Holy Light as they called it here. It had a distinctly human aesthetic, so he figured that it belonged to her paladin friend.
"We are ready to continue." Jessir declared.
"You should take your friend and wait for us outside." Harry replied without preamble.
"But we still need to save Trey!" Arko protested.
"You haven't eaten or rested in days and I won't babysit a liability."
"But what about Trey?!"
"Don't worry, we'll save him." Luna promised.
"I can fight!" The recently freed night elf insisted, probably feeling an irrational urge to prove to herself that she wasn't helpless.
But her friend put a hand on her shoulder and shook her head, then turned to look at him. "We will stay out of your way, but we will not be left behind."
"Stubborn." Harry growled, knowing that Luna would be upset if these two got themselves killed. "Alright, fine, but stay in the back and use your bows."
Arko'narin still looked a bit put out by that, but at least she agreed.
XXXXX
They resumed their advance into the defiled barrow den. The demons and warlocks had by then spread the alarm and organized a defense. The hallways were cleared, while the larger rooms were packed full of cultists and their demon pets.
It availed them none and Jessir could only continue to boggle at their easy progress. Their foes were certainly only rank-and-file cultists and demons so far, but still! And it wasn't just Harry and his overwhelmingly powerful offensive magic, but also the impenetrable defense Luna put up and their incredible cooperation. It was clear that they trusted each other implicitly and had worked together for a very long time.
"Where did you find these two?" Arko hissed at her quietly as they passed through a room full of corpses, a wary eye on Harry.
The wariness was not entirely unfounded, as the human sorcerer was giving the corpse of a felguard a worryingly speculative look. He had not yet displayed any skill in demonology, but given his statement about specialization being for insects, Jessir feared that he was considering acquiring it.
"They were being escorted out of Mount Hyjal by a sentinel." The huntress replied quietly.
"How did they even get in there? Shan'do Stormrage sealed it off until Nordrassil could heal."
"We were using a trans-dimensional portal spell and didn't have a precise destination. We could have ended up just about anywhere that was reasonably safe." Harry answered, clearly having heard their conversation in spite of all efforts to keep it quiet. "Look lively now, we're almost at the place where they were torturing your friend."
Jessir and Arko straightened up and gripped their bows more tightly, although the latter instinctively went for Trey's sword first. She always had been more comfortable in melee.
There was a curious absence of opposition, until a succubus sauntered out of an alcove.
The female demon was a typical example of her kind. Horned, winged, double-jointed legs, cloven feet, squeezed into a tight leather bodice that hid nothing, a coiled whip at her waist and eyes glowing with fel magic. The thing that most struck Jessir about her was the blood on her clawed fingers.
"Visitors?" The demon purred. "We haven't had visitors in quite a while. My name is Rakaiah. Might I have your name, Handsome?" She addressed Harry.
"Harry." He introduced himself with a smile, stepping closer. "Pleasure to meet you."
Jessir stepped forward to warn him about that particular breed of demon and their prowess at bending minds, but Luna grabbed her hand. When the huntress looked at the priestess, all she got was a shake of the head and a reassuring smile.
"Harry, you say?" Rakaiah continued seductively, slinking towards him. "What an innocuous name for one such as yourself. I would like to know you better, Harry. Would you like to know me?"
They were so close now that they were practically breathing each other's air. The succubus had a hand on Harry's chest and was giving him a look of blatant invitation.
Jessir wanted to loose an arrow at the demon who was clearly working her foul magics on the human, but Luna's grip on her hand prevented it. Despite her and Arko's urgent looks, the human priestess only continued to silently reassure them that all was well.
How letting their ally be bewitched by a succubus could be alright escaped her, but respect for the prietess' station prevented them from acting out of turn.
As it turned out, she needn't have worried. Just as the succubus leaned upwards to kiss Harry and no doubt apply her insidious enchantment, he slammed his head down in a brutal headbutt.
Jessir could swear that she heard a metallic clang.
Rakaiah stumbled back from the unexpected attack, but before she could get far, Harry reached out and grabbed her by the hair, roughly forcing her to the ground. Disturbingly, the rough treatment made the demon moan in a distinctly sexual manner.
"That was an interesting use of subjugation magic." Harry commented, forcing the succubus to look up at him. "I imagine it works wonders on people without mental defenses or divine protection."
Was he implying that he had divine protection against subjugation magic?"
"My apologies, I should have known that you prefer to be on top." The succubus said with a mocking smirk, apparently uncowed despite the situation. "How may I service you, Master?"
"Why were you waiting for us here all alone?" Harry demanded.
Did he not wish to attempt invading the demon's mind like he did with the orc outside? That was probably wise.
"Tut, tut." Rakaiah scolded playfully. "You cannot simply bend me over and have your way with me, I am still too willful for that. First, you need to break me in. If you are to be my master, then you will need to know these things."
"Oh, he does." Luna chimed in. "Harry's had plenty of sex slaves and he's always handled them well."
Jessir, Arko and even the succubus froze in bafflement at that. Then Rakaiah began chuckling throatily.
"Is that so?" She asked rhetorically, still chuckling. "Well, then this should be interesting. I await your 'handling' with eager anticipation, Master."
He twisted his fist in her hair, but the succubus only moaned lewdly. "Harder!"
Harry let out a sigh of pure irritation and, apparently deciding that the demon was not going to answer any questions with anything but innuendo, grabbed her by the horns and twisted her head around until the bones in her neck snapped loudly.
"Luna." He stated calmly. "What did I say about talking while I'm interrogating prisoners?"
"Not to." The priestess chirped guilelessly, then her eyes widened in realization and she smacked a fist into her palm. "Ooh, so you weren't going to keep her? I know you wanted a succubus sex slave, so I thought you were."
"When did I say I wanted a succubus sex slave?" Harry asked in honest bewilderment.
"I think it was just before your seventeenth or eighteenth birthday. Maybe nineteenth?" Luna tapped her lip thoughtfully. "I'm pretty sure it was somewhere in the late teens. Early twenties at the latest."
"That was nine hundred years ago for me!" Harry threw his hands up in exasperation. "I like to think that I've matured enough since then to know better than to stick my cock into a literal semen demon."
Well if that was his true age, then it would explain something about his skill with magic. Humans always seemed in such a rush to do things.
"You still stick it into Adrastia."
"… A fair point."
"Excuse me!" Arko broke in angrily, gripping her sword threateningly. "What's this about owning sex slaves?"
"Hold your water," Harry waved her off dismissively. "most of them were just perverts that got wet at the thought of being owned."
"Most?!"
"Hey, how about we check if your friend is in there?" He pointed to the alcove where the succubus came from.
"Don't avoid the question!"
But any thought of pursuing that line of questioning died in Jessir and Arko's minds when they spotted their friend, or what was left of him.
Trey's body had been stripped naked and laid out on a stone slab, the shackles in the corners undone but the raw and bloody skin across around his wrists and ankles speaking of their use. The mess of dried blood and semen around his groin was a clear indication of the violation he had suffered at Rakaiah's hands, while the countless cuts spread out across the rest of his body, the torn out tongue and gouged out eyes spoke of more straightforward torture. Even more sickeningly, the skin from his chest and back had been flayed off and now stood stretched across some kind of tanning racks. Words were carved into it in the language of demons, so it was likely that the succubus had meant to turn it into parchment scrolls or the pages of a book.
Jessir and Arko could only hold on to each other in a mix of grief and rage at what had been done to their friend. Della, her wolf pet, whined sadly. She had liked Trey, too.
"We were too late." Luna said sadly.
"He's been dead for hours." Harry noted more clinically. "The flaying, at least, happened after he died."
A cold comfort.
Luna pulled a large white sheet out of somewhere and laid it over Trey's body. The blood immediately began to stain it. "We'll return for him on the way back and then give him a proper burial. Do you two want to stay with him while Harry and I go deal with the rest of the cultists and demons here or do you want to come with us?"
Jessir took a deep breath to fortify herself and exchanged a look with Arko. Despite obviously not being at her best, her old friend's expression was resolved.
"We will see this through to the end."
XXXXX
The remainder of the trip was devoid of enemies. There were certainly signs of habitation, but they encountered no more opposition. Not until they entered a large hall, whose defining feature was a double stairway made of stone and inscribed with demonic lettering. Clearly a new addition to the barrow dens.
On top of that stairway stood the nathrezim, Lord Banehollow. The demon was easily nine feet tall and looked even larger on account of his horns and wings. Beneath him was the red-skinned fel orc, Shadow Lord Fel'dan, his two succubi pets, the remaining cultists and their demon slaves and even a couple of undead druids, which would explain the rapid spread of corruption through the forest.
"So, Rakaiah has failed." The Dreadlord rumbled as an opening.
Harry said nothing, choosing instead to analyze the demon. This one was strong, strong enough that he would need to be taken seriously.
"I am intrigued." Banehollow continued. "You bear staves that look as if they belong to necromancers, yet they do not feel like it. And there is a faint air of distant divinity about you. Are you truly as human as you appear, or are you the remnants of fallen gods?"
Oh, so the demon was able to sense that much? How interesting.
"Sometimes I also wonder how human I really am." Harry replied honestly, but in the depths of his mind he was already constructing one of his old favorite spells for dealing with large groups of spellcasters.
"The Burning Legion would welcome you, help you regain your powers." The Dreadlord cajoled. "There is no need to debase yourselves by walking amongst lowly mortals. Join with us and you could be gods once more, standing side by side with mighty Sargeras, Lord of the Burning Legion."
"An interesting offer." He replied, hearing the rattle of armor as the night elves twitched. Seems like they didn't trust him. "But how is your dental plan?"
Banehollow paused and furrowed his brow in confusion. "What?"
While the demon was busy expressing his confusion, Harry had taken a deep breath and powered the spell he had constructed. Inside his lungs, the air transmuted into a cursed black smoke. With a forceful exhale, the cursed smoke billowed out of his mouth, expanded rapidly and engulfed the Shadow Council cultists. The cloud of unnatural darkness hadn't harmed him because it was made of his magic, but the cultists immediately began choking and screaming as it attacked their eyes and airways.
He immediately followed it up by lobbing fireballs at the undead druids since they wouldn't be affected by the smoke. Arrows whistled over his shoulders as the two night elves started unloading. Jessir's wolf pet just growled, apparently smart enough to realize that it shouldn't be jumping in there. Luna stood at the ready if she was needed.
The Dreadlord seemed to be busying himself with the cursed smoke. Harry would have interrupted him, but Fel'dan came roaring out of the smoke with blood streaming from his eyes, swinging his flaming two-handed sword.
Why a warlock was using a two-handed sword was anyone's guess, but Harry was quick to use his staff to block. The obviously enchanted blade struck directly in between two spinal ridges that made up the upper part of the shaft and got stuck there, unable to slide either up or down.
In the normal course of events, a metal sword should have easily smashed through a staff of bone, but said staff was bound to Harry's life force. As long as he lived, it was indestructible.
The fel orc was obviously blinded, so the fact that he had actually managed to swing in the right direction was pretty impressive. Harry was about to blast him back when he felt a strong pull on his body. Being very familiar with this tactic, he didn't resist and allowed Luna's spell to yank him backwards.
Fel'dan was unprepared for the sudden loss of resistance and stumbled forward… just in time for a big hunk of rock wreathed in baleful green flame to squish him.
Harry recognized it as an infernal. A long time ago – back in the days when he'd been in a 'summoned minions' phase – he had tried to recreate that particular beasty. The farthest he'd gotten with that was a flashy looking golem that had to be put together ahead of time.
"Block the Dreadlord!" He quickly ordered Luna.
"Got it!" She acknowledged and immediately began transfiguring the surrounding material to obstruct the nathrezim.
Meanwhile, a palpably cold blue glow erupted in the eyes of Harry's staff before a narrow beam of frost magic shot towards the infernal. Arrows also flew at it from Arko and Jessir, the latter's being significantly more accurate as well as often being charged with magical effects.
The wolf still had nothing to do, but it added to the general clamor by growling and howling at it.
The fel flame of the infernal wasn't as easily extinguished as regular fire, but his Ray of Frost was powerful enough to turn people into ice sculptures in seconds. Even the fel fire animating the demonic construct couldn't hold out for long, although he did have to backpedal a few steps to stay out of range before it collapsed into a pile of frozen rocks.
As this occurred, the Dreadlord roared in frustration and physically smashed apart the wood and stone getting in his way before firing a Carrion Swarm at Luna.
Immediately abandoning her transfiguration efforts, the newly inducted priestess of Elune called upon another moonlight barrier. The cloud of demonic insect constructs failed to penetrate.
He's…kind of bad at this. Harry noted. The Dreadlord was certainly powerful, but a front line combatant or a dedicated mage he was not. That correlated with what he remembered about the nathrezim. Manipulators, generals and agents of discord, they only engaged in combat as a last resort.
Before he could conjure up another spell to attack the demon, Banehollow sent out another wave of magic, one that went right through Luna's shield this time.
The wolf companion, whose name he'd never gotten, Jessir and Arko collapsed to the ground, but Harry's face merely twisted into a dark scowl, green eyes full of outrage.
XXXXX
Banehollow was willing to concede – in the privacy of his own mind, of course – that he had badly underestimated his foes. The Burning Legion had information on all of Azeroth's champions and since these two humans were not among them, he had thought that they would be relatively simple to either defeat or convert.
A niggle of worry had entered his thoughts as soon as they stepped into his presence and he was able to sense their odd nature.
That worry had turned into outright fear as the man wiped out most of his servants in a single move and handled the summoned infernal with ease while the woman put up an impenetrable defense.
So he had used the Sleep spell to get around it, hoping to at least slow their minds if not actually put them to sleep.
"Did you seriously just…try to put us to sleep?" The human(?) man asked calmly, but projecting enough menace to give even a Dreadlord pause.
Being a demon, and one of the species to have originated as such at that, Banehollow was practically made up of dark emotions and could as good as smell them on the souls of those around him. Right now, that supernatural sense was telling him that the human(?) mage was pissed.
"What kind of third-rate wizard do you take me for, to think that would work?"
"I don't think he meant it as an insult." The human(?) priestess of Elune(?!) chimed in.
"Bah, screw this." The man's scowl took on a cast of concentration. There was a swell of magical energy and a ball of deep red flame took shape over his hand. "Forbidden Sun!"
The last thing Banehollow saw before he was painfully banished back to the Twisting Nether was a large fireball with a core of molten magma flying towards his face at high speed.
XXXXX
"Hrrmmm." Harry hummed thoughtfully as he stared at the corrupted moonwell, its waters glowing a baleful green from the corruptive fel magic. It felt very chaotic, but also…strangely familiar.
"Should I just try to bless it?" Luna wondered, also frowning at the pool.
"Hang on a second." He said absently, sticking the base of his staff into the pool and moving it around as if he was stirring a bowl of soup.
Slowly, the fel magic began crawling up the staff and collecting in the skull that served as its headpiece. That made the staff radiate with demonic energies, but the moonwell was clean.
"How did you do that?!" Jessir asked, baffled. "I've never seen or heard of anyone simply pulling fel corruption out like that."
"Chaos is the result of two or more incompatible elements being forced together." Harry explained, pulling a crystal flask out of his hammerspace. "And it is the nature of chaos to create more chaos, but since its individual elements are incompatible they are also easy to separate if you know how, especially the most recent ones."
"Are you going to mess around with that in your workshop later?" Luna asked, knowing her husband's proclivities.
"Yep." He nodded, using an alchemical technique to extract the fel magic from his staff and into the flask. "Alright, I'm done here. You're up."
Luna flounced up to the moonwell, which while no longer corrupt, was also lacking in the blessing that made it more than an ordinary pool of water. She bowed her head over it and reached out towards the goddess watching over them from the larger and brighter of the two moons in the night sky.
"Big Sis, help me bless this well." She 'prayed'.
Much to the spiritual crisis of the two observing night elves, this unorthodox method of calling on the Moon Goddess worked and a beam of moonlight did indeed reach down from the sky and hit the waters. A purifying silvery light began to emanate from the well, visibly pushing away the corruption of the surroundings.
Luna nodded to herself in satisfaction and turned to Harry. "We need to come back here when we have time."
"Sure." Harry nodded, knowing that she wanted to purify the rest of Felwood as well. "I'll see if I can put something together to neutralize the corruption more efficiently."
With that decided, they boarded the Nimbus Cloud and flew back to the Emerald Sanctuary.
XXXXX
Being comprised almost entirely of druids working to undo the corruption of Felwood, the Emerald Sanctuary had effectively nothing in the way of amenities, but that was of little concern when you had the equivalent of a small mansion stuffed inside a tent.
Jessir and Arko had been a bit put off by that, but hadn't argued too hard about staying in it. They had a quick meal, something light enough for Arko to handle, and then Luna dragged the two night elves over to the hot tub. A quick scrub in the conjured rain was hardly a thorough cleaning.
Luna was pleased that they didn't put up even a token protest to bathing together. The trauma of what they'd been through was bound to hit Arko, and to a lesser extent Jessir, soon and skinship would make it much easier to comfort them.
The hot tub – especially its massage functions – surprised the two night elves, but they quickly settled in to enjoy it. Arko was clearly out of it, the small amount of food she was able to eat combined with the heat conspiring to drag her into unconsciousness. Luna and Jessir just settled on either side of her and made sure she wouldn't slip below the water while they talked for a bit.
"What did that Dreadlord mean when he called you and Harry gods?" The huntress asked.
"Ah, we were gods on the last world we were on." Luna was happy to explain. "I was the Moon Goddess there, which makes Elune my big sister."
The logic made perfect sense.
"But now you are mortal?" Jessir questioned dubiously.
"Mhm."
"I see."
Eh, what was with that tone? Luna mentally shrugged, dismissing it.
"How did you two meet Trey?" She asked, both to remind them of better times with their friend and to jumpstart the impending emotional breakdown.
Arko jolted slightly and Jessir's face took on a sad cast as she answered. "He came along with a group of other Silver Hand paladins with the intention of helping us fight the demons and undead plaguing our forests. Arko and I had set out to do the same and we ended up working together. He was an earnest man and truly dedicated to his ideals. He didn't deserve to die the way he did."
"We can at least give him a proper burial." Luna reached over to give the night elf's hand a brief squeeze. "Do you know if he had any family?"
"No, that was part of the reason he came to Kalimdor to begin with, he lost everything when Lordaeron fell to the Scourge."
"I can perform the funeral rites, if you want." Luna offered. She had done so for many others.
"Perhaps that would be for the best." Jessir nodded.
There was a brief silence before the huntress asked a question of her own. "What are you and Harry to each other? You worked together exceptionally well."
"We're married, have been for about… ummm, somewhere between six or seven hundred years I think. For me at least, for him it's been closer to nine hundred."
"How is that possible?" Jessir asked, perplexed.
"Harry likes to play around with time whenever he feels like he doesn't have enough of it to do something." Luna said dismissively.
"Time magic, too?" The huntress shook her head in bemusement before speaking more seriously. "The Bronze Dragonflight may not appreciate him doing that here."
"Who are they?"
"Dragons charged to watch over the timeline and maintain it. They usually remain detached from the events on Azeroth, but they will brook no interference with their duty."
"Oh, Harry doesn't like being told that he can't do something." Luna frowned. "But he usually doesn't do more than stretch time, so it should be fine."
"I hope so. None of the Dragon Aspects are to be trifled with lightly, but Nozdormu and his brood are said to be especially serious about their duties."
Luna nodded in understanding and turned to look at the other night elf in the tub. "I think we might need to get Arko to bed for now."
The huntress looked at her barely conscious friend and agreed. "Yes, that seems wise."
Luna ignored Arko's weak protests and scooped her up into a bridal carry. A quick spell dried all three of them off and then she led the way towards the bedroom. To the obvious surprise of the night elves, she settled in with them instead of leaving.
"Are you not going to spend the night with your husband?" Jessir asked, frowning slightly.
"You need me more than he does right now" Luna replied simply, laying Arko down on the bed and scooping her into a cuddle. "Losing friends is never easy."
She felt the night elven warrior in her arms begin to tremble and knew that her body had finally gone out of survival mode. That was good, falling unconscious in that state wouldn't have done her any good.
"Shhh, it's alright, I've got you. You're safe." Luna crooned softly, holding the night elf's head to her chest and running her fingers through her blue-green hair. A faint silvery glow began to emanate from her skin, filling the room with a sense of peace.
Jessir was quick to join them on the bed, pressing herself against Arko's back and pulling the sheet over them.
Getting another idea, Luna briefly turned her focus inward, blessing her own breast milk before maneuvering a nipple towards Arko's lips.
The night elf was briefly surprised, but her eyes fluttered shut and body relaxed as soon as the first few drops hit her tongue.
It tasted of chocolate, which reminded her of the time that Trey had gone to great lengths to import ingredients for a chocolate cake once he learned their birthday was coming up, even though they told him that night elves only celebrated such things once a century. Furthermore, it also carried the sensation of peace and tranquility that all night elves learned to associate with Elune. It was almost like drinking the waters of a moonwell, but added to it was the unmistakable feeling of a mother's love.
With that and her oldest friend at her back, it took less than a minute before Arko was fast asleep.
"Sleep well." Luna murmured quietly, reaching her free hand over Arko and around Jessir's waist, knowing that the huntress needed some comfort, too. It would be a deep, dreamless sleep.
XXXXX
Well, that was certainly unorthodox. Elune mused, observing the actions of her newest priestess. Unorthodox, but effective.
Luna was far more powerfully aligned with the aspect of Mother Moon than Tyrande, who was more in tune with the Night Warrior aspect. Her high priestess was by no means incapable of channeling Elune's power to heal, soothe and nurture, but it did not come quite as naturally as it did to Luna. She would be a great force for good even her husband had proven to be…
Well, perhaps not exactly good, but prudent and restrained enough in his ambitions that there was little danger of him inviting disaster the way the Highborne had done. Regardless, Luna loved him and the least that Elune could do for her new priestess was have some faith in her.
With the pressing matter of helping Azeroth's new arrivals get a foot in the door settled – as well as answering the prayers of two of her faithful – the Moon Goddess turned her attention elsewhere.
XXXXX
"Ah, has your wife abandoned you to play with her new friends?" Adrastia asked mockingly, coyly hiding a smile behind her hand. "Do you think she has them on their knees…worshiping?"
"I'm almost certain that this isn't a porn logic universe." Harry replied, being deliberately obtuse.
"You really must take us to one of those someday."
"I have a feeling that there might be unforeseen dangers there."
"Perhaps, but since when do you flinch away from danger? She teased.
"Depends on the type of danger." He retorted wrily. "So, what have you found out while we were gone?"
"The night elves are doomed." Adrastia declared succinctly.
"So it is that bad?" He sighed, the question mostly rhetorical. He had already suspected.
"Indeed." She nodded. "They have been immortal until recently and still live for thousands of years even now. A thousand children per century is considered a population boom and their courtships can last for millennia. Worse still, their military is made up almost entirely of women and many of their men sleep the ages away due to some druidic mumbo-jumbo that would probably make sense to you, but to me it just means that they aren't fucking their women. As a cherry on top, they are strictly monogamous and mate for life. Good for stability, bad for numbers. How they have lasted even this long escapes me, but I got the impression that their numbers have taken a sharp hit recently."
"If I'm remembering my game lore correctly, that would probably be thanks to the orcs under Grom Hellscream and the Burning Legion invasion shortly afterwards." Harry said contemplatively, grinning slightly at her strange expression.
She was still having trouble wrapping her head around the fact that they were in something previously written off as a video game universe.
"Yes, well, regardless of the reason, they are skirting the edge of extinction." Adrastia continued. "I wasn't able to get a hard number of course, but from what I could infer I would say they are one more serious disaster away from being beyond saving. Even now, they would need to stop sending their women off to war and start enthusiastically breeding them instead if they wanted to turn things around."
"Yeah, that's not happening." Harry snorted, hardly able to imagine how set in its ways a culture of immortals would be. "Anything else?"
"Only bits and pieces, nothing relevant. In any case, will you be requiring…company, since Luna is with the night elves?"
"No, I have better things to do." Harry shook his head in refusal.
The Black Widow reared back as if struck and huffed at him. "Are you really going to be like this from now on? You already dragged me away from my comfortable little spider web to punish me, there is no need to petty on top of it."
Harry stared at her for a moment and then smiled knowingly. "None of the night elf males wanted to fuck you, did they?"
She said nothing, merely crossing her arms and looking away. It was definitely not a pout.
"Don't worry, you're still pretty." He said condescendingly. "Maybe they just don't like women under seven feet tall? Or human women? Or black women?"
"Maybe." Adrastia ground out tersely. "Will you be needing me or not?"
"No, I really do have more important things to do." Harry refused again. "We promised those Sentinels we'd go to Darnassus with them and I want to get this done as soon as possible, so I have no time to waste on sex."
He had a distinct feeling that Elune had sent them on the quest to help Jessir so that Luna could score some quick brownie points with the night elves. A random human priestess of Elune was one thing, but a random human priestess of Elune that had saved a couple of night elves and participated in a quest to bring down a Dreadlord was quite another.
"Hmph, fine!" She sniffed and stalked out. "You know where to find me if you change your mind."
Harry cracked another smile. She might put on a good show, but like all women that relied on their sexuality to get by in life, being rejected stung her pride.
Now alone, Harry took a deep breath and assumed a lotus position.
"Alright, Azeroth, talk to me." He said to himself, sinking his consciousness into the planet's world soul.
It was slow going. The planet was new and unfamiliar, but he knew the process of it and soon he was able to sense the edges of the immense consciousness he had sensed upon first arriving.
Young. That was the very first impression he got. He knew that it was incredibly ancient by mortal standards, but it felt young. Immature? Inexperienced? Still developing?
And female. That was new, he'd never thought to ascribe gender to a world, but it felt unmistakably female.
Hours passed as he meditated, gradually getting a better feeling for the world soul beyond the surface impressions. He was just figuring out that Azeroth was asleep in some manner when something changed. She became aware of him and the sheer weight of her regard instantly knocked him out of his trance.
"Okay!" Harry forced himself to exhale calmly, despite his frantically beating heart. "I'm fine, my mind wasn't crushed like a grape by the celestial catterpillar, this is good. And she felt hopeful rather than angry, maybe even desperate, which is even better. Need to work on my staying power, though."
Half an hour later he was still going over what he'd learned so that his next attempt would go better when Luna poked her head into the room.
"Hey, are you ready?" She asked. "Trey's funeral is about to start."
"Well I can't possibly miss that." He replied sardonically, a tone that Luna disregarded as usual.
XXXXX
Omake – Porn Logic
Harry couldn't shake the feeling that something was wrong, and he wasn't talking about the fact that they'd landed in what was supposed to be a video game world.
The first thing was the bikini armor of the Sentinels. He wasn't sure if they used those in the game, but it seemed likely. Big titty fantasy elves always end up in bikini armor. Stupid, but he let it go.
Then it was Luna getting a spiritual visit by Elune. Not unexpected in hindsight, but her dazed expression afterwards was a bit suspicious.
Then it was Jessir promising a reward if they helped her save her friends. Okay, weird, but maybe the night elves were sex fiends. They had that nature thing going for them, so maybe they were very sexually liberal? The justification felt a bit thin, but then again, bikini armor.
The next clue was the corruption of the Felwood, which felt distinctly…lewd. Everything was tinged pink and many of the plants were either phallic or vagina-esque. By then Harry was extremely suspicious.
But the time they stormed the Shadow Hold and found that Arko'narin was inexplicably clean, not starved, not tortured, not suffering from painful muscle cramps despite being stuffed into a tiny cage for several days and far too perky to be at all traumatized, he pretty much knew what was up.
The last straw was when they found Treya Lightforge – which made Harry realize that Jessir and Arko had never mentioned their friend's gender. The paladin was stripped naked, chained to the ceiling with a ballgag stuffed in her mouth and a leather-clad succubus fondling her breasts from behind.
"Oh, visitors?" The succubus said throatily. "And such a man! Absolutely perfect. You can help me break in this little slut, teach her the pleasures of the dark side. I am Mistress Rakaiah, and we are going to have a great deal of fun together. Now strip!" She finished with a snap of her whip, which just appeared in her hand despite being coiled at her waist a moment ago.
Jessir and Arko began stripping off their bikini armor as if that was a perfectly reasonable request.
To Harry's exasperation, so did Luna.
"Alright, pack it up." He ordered, pulling his wife back. "We ended up in a porn universe."
"But, Harry, you always wanted to do a succubus." Luna protested. "This is your big chance."
Harry's eyebrow twitched, feeling the lewd logic of a porn universe trying to twist his thinking into accepting the paper-thin reasoning. It went way beyond mere magical influence, because porn universes were places where two plus two was not equal four. In a porn universe, two plus two equaled sex.
Luna had clearly already been affected, no doubt the work of the slutty Moon Goddess, Elune.
"Leaving already?" Rakaiah pouted, leaning forward and bringing her arms together to emphasize her bust. "Is there no way I could convince you to stay?"
It was hilariously unsubtle, but it was working because the universe wanted it to work. The local laws of reality insisted that if sex could happen, then it should happen.
Harry exhaled gustily, knowing that he had caught on too late. He was already trapped and couldn't force his thoughts into anything other than planning out the order in which he was going to fuck the four females in the room with him. Fortunately, he knew that the mental effect would abate once the requirement for sex was satisfied.
"Fine." He growled, undressing. "But I'm on top."
Rakaiah cracked her whip again, lustful energy crackling along with length. "If you think you can force me to submit, then come and try it."
XXXXX
A few hours later…
Harry and Luna returned from their first quest triumphantly, only to encounter a visibly exhausted Adrastia laying in the center of the Emerald Sanctuary. She was covered in so much cum that one might mistake her for a piece of abstract art.
"Harry…" The Black Widow began hoarsely, looking as if she wasn't all there. "I think there is something wrong with this universe."
"You don't say?" He replied sarcastically. "What was your first clue?"
Apparently fucked too stupid to notice the sarcasm, she answered. "I started getting suspicious when the night elf males formed a queue, but it wasn't until one of the tauren started on me and my body just stretched around his cock that I knew for certain."
Harry facepalmed, hard. "Just…get yourself cleaned up and meet us on the edge of the camp. We have to get out of here before someone propositions us again."
XXXXX
You may have noticed that the beginning bears some similarity to the way "Wizard Runemaster" by plums starts.
This is deliberate. As he got his inspiration to write a WoW crossover from some other guy whose name escapes me at the moment, I got frustrated by his lack of updates and decided to write my own fic. And since a good running gag should never be wasted, I also decided to start it off in a similar place.
If some intrepid future fanfic writer decides to make a WoW crossover after reading my fic, I implore you to do the same thing. The fate of the world depends upon it.