My Girlfriend is an Evil Woman

Uchida Yuma continued to chatter incessantly behind Kitahara Hideji, repeatedly commenting on Takasaki Mako’s figure, appearance, and temperament. He spoke with certainty, convinced that Kitahara Hideji would regret his decision in the future. His face twisted in a grotesque manner, as if he wished he could turn back time and accept Takasaki Mako’s confession on Kitahara Hideji’s behalf. He even thought about how to deceive Takasaki Mako and take her to a love hotel.

Kitahara Hideji ignored him, remaining silent as if he hadn’t heard anything. Uchida Yuma was at an age when he was interested in women. Although he was lecherous and talkative, he could provide valuable information. However, the downside was having to endure his constant chatter from time to time. It was a trade-off.

After all, humans were social creatures and needed some form of communication. When Kitahara Hideji entered this body, he was faced with the high school entrance ceremony and needed to gather information. It just so happened that this sociable Uchida Yuma approached him. Kitahara Hideji subtly probed for information, but he ended up being stuck with Uchida Yuma, as if Uchida Yuma had considered him a friend. For now, Kitahara Hideji didn’t want to break ties with Uchida Yuma since he needed to learn a lot of things from him.

Fortunately, although Uchida Yuma had an unappealing appearance and was going through the turbulent stage of adolescence, he wasn’t a bad person. Kitahara Hideji could tolerate him, albeit reluctantly.

He ordered the cheapest soy sauce ramen from the counter, while Uchida Yuma casually ordered a serving of tonkotsu ramen. Uchida Yuma continued to talk non-stop, while Shima Rei went to another counter to buy Italian-style fried noodles. It seemed that Shima Rei had a preference for sweeter flavors.

When the aroma of the ramen filled the air, Uchida Yuma’s growling stomach settled down slightly. Together with Kitahara Hideji, they carried their bowls of noodles and walked towards the dining area. However, Uchida Yuma couldn’t help but lament, “Ah, based on the information I’ve gathered, Takasaki is either exceptional or at least above average. Hey, Kitahara, what are you thinking? Say something!”

The dining area was sparsely occupied, and Kitahara Hideji looked for a vacant table for the three of them. He casually replied, “I don’t have time. I need to study.”

“These two things don’t conflict!” Uchida Yuma persisted. He remembered that Takasaki Mako had a small group of friends, two girls who often hung out together and looked decent. If Kitahara Hideji succeeded, he might have the opportunity to spend time with those two girls as well, increasing his chances of getting into a relationship or even taking things further. “We can worry about studying in the third year. For now, we should make the most of our youth… Ah, watch out!”

Uchida Yuma exclaimed, and before Kitahara Hideji could react, he felt someone bump into him from the side. He quickly stabilized the tray in his hand to prevent the brimming bowl of soup from spilling.

“Sorry!” came a slightly dazed apology, and Kitahara Hideji turned his head to look… only to be startled. He couldn’t see anyone! But when he looked down, he noticed a very short girl bent over, her head almost disappearing beneath the tray. No wonder he couldn’t see her at first glance.

The girl was wearing the spring uniform of Private Fukuda Academy, with a white shirt and a light yellow cardigan over it. She had a red tie, and her skirt was a mix of dark red and black plaid, complemented by black knee-high cotton socks. Her round-toe leather shoes were polished to a shine. However, she was really short. If it weren’t for the uniform on display, Kitahara Hideji would have mistaken her for an elementary school student who had wandered into the high school.

“It’s alright, are you okay?” Kitahara Hideji smiled faintly, not minding the accidental collision. The girl straightened up, rubbing her sleep-filled eyes, and sheepishly said, “I’m so tired, I wasn’t paying attention and didn’t see the way clearly. I apologize for causing you trouble… truly sorry.” As she spoke, she caught sight of Kitahara Hideji’s face and froze. “Is it you? Kita… Kitahara Hideji?!”

Kitahara Hideji was surprised. Could it be someone he knew? Wasn’t the original owner of this body supposed to have no acquaintances in Nagoya? Was she someone he had seen in the past few days or a fellow classmate? He felt doubtful, but he didn’t show it on his face. He focused and carefully observed the girl’s face, realizing that she was quite attractive—small face, crescent-shaped eyes, delicate eyebrows, cherry-like lips, and two faint dimples on her cheeks. However, her expression was slowly transitioning from a tired and sleepy state to annoyance, revealing a pair of sharp canines that gleamed coldly. Although Kitahara Hideji had mild prosopagnosia, he confirmed that he didn’t recognize her, and she wasn’t a classmate either. If she were, he would remember someone that short.

Not sure what to make of the situation, Kitahara Hideji tentatively asked, “Yes, I’m Kitahara. And you are…?” He was overly cautious, even unintentionally using polite language.

The short girl narrowed her crescent-shaped eyes, and her expression grew even more annoyed. She blurted out, a mix of embarrassment and anger, “You don’t recognize me?”

“Well… Have we met before?”

The girl seemed on the verge of getting angry but couldn’t quite muster it. After a moment of hesitation, she suddenly tiptoed, stretched her small mouth, and took a big sip of the soup from Kitahara Hideji’s bowl. With a slurp, she drank a mouthful of the noodle soup, then glared angrily at Kitahara Hideji before swiftly disappearing, her tiny figure vanishing in an instant.

What just happened? Kitahara Hideji stood there, utterly bewildered. After a brief moment of stupefaction, he turned to Uchida Yuma and asked, “Who… who was she?”

Uchida Yuma was also shocked. It was the first time he had encountered such a bizarre situation—someone openly stealing soup and drinking it? He pondered for a moment before responding, “Based on her height… she seems to be Fukuzawa Fuyumi from Class C.”

Shima Rei had already secured their seats and beckoned them over. As Kitahara Hideji walked towards him, he couldn’t help but wonder, “Fukuzawa Fuyumi from Class C? Why would she do something like that?”

Taking a sip of his own soup, Uchida Yuma couldn’t make sense of it either. “I don’t know. According to the information I’ve gathered about the school’s female students, you two shouldn’t know each other! She’s a local, and you’re from Tottori Prefecture—a considerable distance apart… Strange, isn’t it?” He followed Kitahara Hideji to their seats and continued to show off his information-gathering skills. “Fukuzawa Fuyumi is said to have entered from a local public junior high school in the DS District. She’s blood type A, Capricorn, and she’s the shortest in her grade, standing at around 150 centimeters. But rumor has it that she uses insoles in her shoes to appear taller, so her actual height is around 145 centimeters. As for her figure, it’s classified as AA.”

Kitahara Hideji looked at his bowl of ramen, feeling hesitant. He wondered if Fukuzawa Fuyumi had any contagious diseases. Could he still eat it? If he discarded it, his wallet couldn’t handle the strain. He didn’t have any income at the moment, and while 250 yen wasn’t a lot, it also wasn’t negligible. As he contemplated his options, he casually responded, “What do you mean by ‘AA’?”

Uchida Yuma couldn’t wait for him to ask and gleefully replied while picking at the splinters on his chopsticks, “You don’t know? Let me educate you. This is all knowledge, you know! AA refers to the fact that her bust size differs by only 7.5 centimeters—she’s super flat-chested. She’s probably still wearing sports bras. It’s really pitiful!”

Having said that, Uchida Yuma burst into laughter, his laughter obnoxious to the extreme.

Kitahara Hideji glanced at Uchida Yuma and was left speechless. In less than ten days of knowing him, Uchida Yuma had already informed him about 266 different styles of women’s underwear… If only he could channel that enthusiasm into studying, he would have a good chance of getting into a prestigious university and securing a bright future. Instead, he wasted it on such inappropriate matters.

Uchida Yuma laughed to himself for a while. He enjoyed talking to Kitahara Hideji, as his childhood friend Shima Rei was a silent type and a stickler. He either ignored Uchida Yuma or lectured him with a stern face. It was rare to find someone who could patiently listen to his nonsense and tolerate it. Seeing Kitahara Hideji hesitating over the ramen bowl, Uchida Yuma figured out what was going on. His eyes rolled, and he pushed his own bowl towards Kitahara Hideji with a smug grin, saying, “Let’s trade!”

Kitahara Hideji glanced at him again and immediately understood his intention—Uchida Yuma was fixated on the spot where Fukuzawa Fuyumi was slurping her soup, probably hoping for an indirect kiss!

This guy… There should be a limit to being a perv! Have you never seen a woman in your entire life?

He cursed inwardly and started eating his own ramen without a second thought. Uchida Yuma’s ramen was slightly more expensive, and he didn’t want to take advantage of him. Besides, he didn’t have much money left and didn’t want to buy another serving. He decided to bear with it!

Uchida Yuma had thick skin and didn’t mind being glared at by Kitahara Hideji. His jokes were mostly for amusement, and he hadn’t actually intended to go for an “indirect kiss.” He simply declared, “Itadakimasu!” and began eating, shifting the topic of conversation. He wasn’t particularly interested in the unattractive Fukuzawa Fuyumi, so a few jokes and taunts were enough. He then asked, “By the way, Kitahara, what club are you planning to join?”

This topic caught the attention of Shima Rei, who was leisurely eating his stir-fried noodles, and he looked up with a hint of anticipation.