My Mangekyo Sharingan’s Ability is Bungee Gum??

In the darkness of the snowy Konoha night, four Root Anbu crouched behind the dense branches of an evergreen tree, their masks blending perfectly with the shadows.

"Why does he always want the kids?" muttered one.

His hands gripped the hilt of his kunai and the other another kunai.

"Can't we just, I don't know, protect the Hokage or something normal for once?"

Another turned his head slightly, his fox mask catching the faint moonlight.

"This is the third child this month. I'm starting to think Diddyzo Sama doesn't even care about the village- just his creepy collection of prodigies."

"Shh!" hissed the leader, his hawk mask barely moving as he tightened his grip on the tree trunk.

"Focus. Uchiha Oink is a threat to the stability of Konoha. That's all we need to know."

But the nervous one wasn't done.

"A threat? The kid's sitting on a cherry blossom tree! He's not plotting anything- he's probably just writing poetry or something! And! And! Oink?! Who even names their kid Oink? Does he have siblings named Moo and Baa?"

The fourth ninja, silent until now, finally spoke, his tone dry.

"You saw the report. High suspicion of Mangekyō Sharingan at seven. We may die. You know that, right?"

"Focus!" the leader growled again, but his voice faltered when his gaze shifted to Oink.

The boy was still sitting on the cherry blossom tree, utterly serene, petals swirling around him in the moonlight.

"Look at him!" the nervous one continued, panic creeping into his tone. "He's holding a petal! That's not normal!! Normal people don't go around holding petals and looking at them with such profound melancholy!"

The fox-masked ninja sighed. "Do you think he can see us? What if we're already in a genjutsu?"

The leader hesitated for a moment, his hands tightening around his kunai. "No. If we were in a genjutsu, I'd-"

He stopped, unable to finish the sentence.

The silence stretched ominously.

The dry one muttered in a low voice.

"...I'd still say we're in a genjutsu,"

From the tree, Oink tilted his head ever so slightly, as if hearing their whispered doubts. His silver-streaked eyes glanced at the moon before lowering to the Root.

The nervous one froze. "Oh no. He's looking at us. He's looking right at us!"

The leader hissed, although his voice was laced with low self-esteem.

"Calm down. Stick to the mission. We take him or eliminate him. That's the order."

The dry one snorted softly. "Sure. Let's just eliminate the seven-year-old with the Mangekyō Sharingan. Great plan. Fantastic plan."

The nervous one let out a tiny, panicked laugh. "I should've been a farmer. Before being kidnapped into root my dad told me I had a gift for growing daikon."

"Shut up, or I'll eliminate you!" the leader snapped, but his voice cracked halfway through.

Before anyone could respond, Oink leaped gracefully from the tree, landing on the snow-dusted grass. Cherry blossom petals twirled in the air around him, caught in the moonlight like a surreal, deadly ballet.

"Come out," Oink said softly, his voice ethereal, almost bored.

The Root froze, their collective breaths hitching.

"Do we… do we go out?" the nervous one whispered.

"Of course we do!" the leader barked, though his voice betrayed a tinge of fear. "Move!"

The nervous one rolled his eyes,

'Goddamnit why do they always send us after Uchiha kids?! First Itachi! Now Oink!'

The four Root ninjas flickered from the shadows, forming a tight semi-circle around Oink. The boy didn't flinch, his gaze drifting lazily to the petal in his hand.

"Uchiha Oink. We have orders. Come with us, and you will have made great service to the village."

Oink's eyes flicked up, cold and piercing. "And if I don't?"

The leader hesitated. "Then we shall eliminate you."

The nervous one gulped audibly. "We're dead. We're all dead. I knew I should've stayed in bed today."

Oink sighed, his gaze turning to the moon. "The moon is beautiful today."

And then it happened.

The Root ninjas felt their bodies freeze, their minds scrambling to understand. The world blurred, petals spiraling into a storm of pink. One by one, they collapsed, blood staining the snow in delicate arcs.

The nervous one sighed regretfully full of bitterness… right before his head separated from his body.

"I should've cut my tongue and sold dango in Konoha."

The wind carried his words into the still night, and the cherry blossoms continued to fall.