Naruto: The Unwoven Threads of Fate

"Ah." I sink further into my luxurious private bath at the town's best hot spring spa. I let the freakishly nice warm water creep all the way up to my neck before stopping my descent. "This is the life."

I lazily look across the surprisingly spacious tub I am in, frankly it is more like a large jacuzzi than a tub. Plenty of room for others, after all this is a private room. Usually it's couples that take these and they do some more… amorous activities. Anyways, I look across the pool towards a chilled glass of water.

It's too far away for me to grab.

"Chakra strings for the win." I smile to myself as the glass seemingly on its own accord smoothly slides across the edge of the pool to my hand. "How petty, using a jutsu to make my life easier. Fuck it, I refuse to feel bad about that. I deserve a me day. One where I can just kick back and relax."

A few minutes pass in relative silence, the only sounds that are heard are the lapping of the water shifting in the pool and the steady trickle of new water falling down into the tub.

"Are those bubbles?" A bottle of some mysterious liquid lifts into the air and floats to my waiting hand. "Not just any bubbles. Vanilla scented bubbles. Whoops. I 'accidentally' poured in the whole thing. How silly of me. You'd think a shinobi would be better than that, oh well."

The very pleasant smelling bubbles quickly take over the entire bath, completely hiding the water from sight.

"Ah." I refreshingly sigh out once more. "This is the life."

Present, Orochimaru's Office

"I do not need to hear the details of your visit to the hot springs." Orochimaru monotonously scolds me while wearing a blank face. Then a flicker of emotion dances across his face. "I fail to see how it is of any importance. But you do know what is important? Telling me who murdered my elite bodyguards!"

"Well if you would let me continue and not keep interrupting me for side conversations I might get to it sooner!" I snarkily retort as I childishly pout. The effect is completely lost, it's impossible to look childish while covered head to toe in blood. "You sent me on a mission to win over Yugito and by extension Kumo. I'm recounting everything of importance that happened on said mission since you gave it to me. Oh what's that? You want to know who told me to do that? You did. What a curve ball!"

"I will only let so much sass slide." There's a warning in his tone, I may have gone slightly too far. "You're quickly approaching the limit."

"Message received." I let my childish pout fade. "But really though I wasn't telling you about the bath just for shit, kicks and giggles. It does relate to the diplomatic mission you sent me on and it could reveal something that you don't know. Plus all this went down on the last day we were there, the only thing left to tell after this is how the Sound Three died."

"Fine." Orochimaru growls out in increasing anger. "Continue your... ballad of the bath. Because I have nothing better to do while I patiently wait to hear what happened to the Sound Three."

"I promise it's relevant! Or… kinda relevant?"

Flashback, The Hot Spring

"Ah." Only my head is showing above the excessive amount of bubbles in the pool. "This is the life."

~That's the third time you've said that.~

"I know. And it is." I scoop up two handfuls of the bubbles and clap my hands together. They explode and fly everywhere. "Hehehe. I'm doing that again."

~This is the infamous Heart Thief. The shinobi who abandoned his home. The shinobi who chose to live in his own personal hell. The shinobi who has plotted the downfall of an entire village and is successfully pulling it off. The person who is scheming to stop the Fourth Shinobi War. People already whisper your name with a sense of fear and respect, both of which only grow with each achievement you add to your already impressive mission history. And you're playing with bubbles.~

"... Dick." Sureddo isn't wrong though. But it's so much fun! "Wanna join? Not like I can't spare a heart or two for a while."

~No thank you, I have no desire to do something so… asinine.~

"You're missing out." I clap my hands together once more, causing a bubble apocalypse.

~Whatever you say. Besides, I'm not too sure your visitor would take well to me lounging in the bath.~

"Visitor? What visitor?" I perk up at that. "If one of the Sound Three ordered me a hooker as revenge I will hurt them."

~Sorry to disappoint, it is not a hooker. Yugito is about to walk through the door.~

"Shit really?" My eyes dart to the only entrance. Well the only conventional entrance, I am a shinobi. If there isn't an entrance I'll make one. Preferably with liberal amount of fire and chaos. Chaos is optional.

The door to the private bath slides open and none other than Yugito herself steps in. She's draped in only a towel, much like how I was when I entered myself. Though I wore a long robe instead of a towel to hide my scar torn body. No need to freak out the other people here, that's the reason I got a private bath. I wanted to bathe in peace and not be stared at.

"I'm sorry." Yugito awkwardly says once she realized that someone is in here. "I didn't know it was occupied - oh. It's you."

"Sup." I pleasantly greet her with a wave, the motion causes bubbles to scatter in the wind.

It also revealed my limb to the world and Yugito's eyes quickly latched onto it. It is the first time she's seen my bare skin and all of the marks that are littered across it.

"Just out of curiosity, how many of those are from me?" She asks from her spot near the door.

"Hm?" I lift my arm out of the bubbles and hold it in front of me. Logs that have gone through a wood chipper are less marked than my arm. "Excellent question. I have no idea. Definitely not the majority though, that award goes to someone else."

"Who?" She conversationally asks but I know her true intentions. She's subtly probing me for information. Let's see how she reacts to this.

"Orochimaru." My easy answer shocks her, just for a moment. Her eyes widened and her jaw went slack but she quickly reigned in her emotions before they could run wild. "Nothing says I love you like repeated dismemberment."

"Seriously?" She adjusts her towel. "Your own father is responsible for the majority of the scars on your arm?"

"Nope!" I merrily say while popping the 'p.' "He's responsible for the majority of all my scars. Training is a bitch! Plus technically he gave me the Jiongu so by the transitive property all those scars could be attributed to him also. He's pushing like 90%. I think."

"That's… that's fucked up." She eloquently sums up.

"That's one way to put it. Another is saying he's effective at training me, you of all people should know that." I idly scratch the back of my head, making a quizzical motion. "So are you going to continue to stand there or do you want to get in? I don't mind sharing."

"Excuse me?" She snarls out as her anger spikes.

"Get your mind out of the gutter I didn't mean like that you moron!" I scoff out while waving off her rage. "We're friends. No, that doesn't sound right. Pals? No, not that either. Sparring buddies? Closer. Oh, I know. We're both on a mission to get to know each other. So let's get to know one another. Obviously you wanted a private bath for your own reasons and I'm not going to pry but the only reason I got one was so that the civvies wouldn't constantly stare at me. I don't mind sharing with a fellow shinobi. Especially since this tub is made to hold eight people. Not like there isn't plenty of room."

"O-oh. Right." She quickly scans the room once. "Well… I suppose I could. It would make sense for the mission. Fair warning, I wanted a private bath because Matatabi really hates water. Like really hates it. Not only is she a cat she's practically make of fire, so I might be a bit jumpy. Try to not make any sudden movements please."

She said Matatabi. My lesson did sink in. Turns out you can teach an old dog new tricks. Old cat? Eh, whatever.

"No quick or sudden movements. That won't be hard to do, I'm here to relax." I sigh out in contentment.

"And you will look away as I get in." Her tone brokers no argument. "Or I'll make the beating you got during our spar look like a pleasant morning jog."

"Duly noted." I turn my back to her as the water laps at my neck.

I feel the water shift as she steps into the pool. Good thing I put the bubbles in otherwise we'd both be getting an eyeful.

"You may turn around now." She tells me and I slowly do just that.

We sit in silence for a few minutes, simply relaxing in the bath and acclimating to the presence of the other person.

"So." Yugito breaks the slightly awkward silence. "You're okay from the spar? No lasting damage?"

"Totally fine thanks to that super duper scared kid you brought along. He fixed me up well." I confidently assure her. "There's no need to worry about me, I've been through worse. Wow that's a depressing sentence."

"What could have possibly been worse than that?" She sounds skeptical. I don't blame her, I took one hell of a beating during our spar, especially when she went to version two. I've never had all my limbs and head cut off at the same time before.

"Getting the Jiongu isn't a pleasant experience." My mood sours for a moment as I remember exactly how Sureddo and I came together. "Not only that mine is altered by Orochimaru of all people. So yeah, enough said about that."

"That bad?" She questions me.

"Probably on par with getting a bijuu sealed into yourself. Maybe worse, I've only been through one so I couldn't tell you specifically."

"Ouch." She winces in sympathy as she remembers her own experiences.

"Yeah. Ouch." I darkly chuckle to myself.

We fall into a silence once more, but this one is tainted. The once pleasant-ish mood has been spoiled.

"Hey Yugito?" It's my turn to break the quiet.

"Yes?" She looks up from the countless bubbles shifting on the water's surface and gives me her full attention.

"I want you to do something for me. If you do it I'll answer three questions of your choice. What do you say, interested?"

"Depends on what it is you want me to do." There's a touch of a warning in her voice. Probably because a teenager is asking for a favor while we're both naked in a bubble bath. Wow I really should have thought that one through.

"Nothing major." A single chakra string extends towards my folded pile of clothes and connects to my hip pouch. The pouch is dragged across the ground towards me and I pick it up once it is in arm's reach. I rummage around in it for a brief moment before withdrawing something. "If you could attempt to fill this with as much chakra as possible, that would be fantastic."

I hold out the hilt of my version of the Sword of Totsuka to her. I've tested it myself by pouring in a huge amount of chakra into it and it didn't have any issues. But I don't want huge, I want an ungodly amount of chakra. I'm simply not capable of that.

But the jinchuuriki sitting across from me is.

"And what do you plan to do with my chakra?" She asks as she studies the unassuming piece of metal.

"Absolutely nothing." I quickly and confidently assure her. "This isn't about your chakra, it's about testing the receptacle. If you want I'll even let you watch me empty it before we part ways."

"Alright." She hold out her hand and I give the hilt to her. "So fill it until it breaks?"

"Or you can't put anymore into it." I nod in confirmation. "If it starts to burn your hand that's usually a sign it's about to explode. Fair warning."

"Great. You gave me an explosive device." She eyes the unusually plain piece of metal with a great deal of doubt. "You do know that I have a freakishly large amount of chakra at my disposal, right? Just how much do you want me to sink into it?"

"Oh I don't know." I sarcastically ponder for a moment to build suspense and because Yugito really needs to lighten up. She takes everything way too seriously. "Let's go for… all of it."

"All of it." She monotonously repeats.

"All of it." I smirk and bob my head in confirmation. "I built it to take much more than the measly amount of chakra you have access to, it's just that you have way more chakra than anyone else I've met recently."

Though Naruto does have you beat but we're not exactly on the best of terms right now.

"Fine." She thinks I'm challenging her. Well… whatever. I got what I wanted in the end. "Don't go crying to daddy when I break your toy."

"Pfft I wouldn't waste my time." I snort out in dark amusement. "He'd simply raise an eyebrow at me and say something like 'quit wasting my time with something so trivial. You built it once, do it again.' Or he'd flay me a little, but I'm getting used to that."

Present

"You're painting me in a very bad light." Orochimaru points out with a raised eyebrow.

Called it.

"Well duh. You're supposed to be feared by all, I should be no exception. Those under you are hardened beyond any other village's standards. Those you've personally trained even more so, they are to be taken seriously no matter how weird or crazy they seem. And then there's me, the person you call child. You should hold me to the highest standards of all and you do. I'm just tweaking it a little to further your reputation as someone you don't fuck with."

"Alvarcus. I have to ask. Do you ever not plan things out ahead of time? Do your words and actions ever not serve another purpose?"

"On occasion yes." I honestly reply. It's true that I am always looking ahead and steering my environment to better suit me as needed. "For instance when I stole the jacuzzi Yugito and I used."

"You… you what?"

"Stole the jacuzzi." I easily confirm as I pull out a single scroll and wiggle it in his direction. "By the way I need a plumber. Do we have one of those on hand?"

"I cannot believe this." Orochimaru shakes his head in disbelief and disappointment. "Yet at the same time I am not surprised. Oh, the irony. And why on earth do you need a plumber?"

"I want to set this up in my room." I idly toss the scroll in the air and it tumbles end over end. Without looking at it I snag it out of the air and repeat, almost as if it's a nervous tick. Except I'm just bored not nervous. "There's no hot water lines in my room, I need one. Unless you want me to royally fuck up the water lines. Wait, nevermind I'll figure something out with seals. It'll be a good side project for me since it is something I've never tried before."

"So no plumber then?" He asks.

"Yep." I sharply nod once as my mind runs down the rabbithole to chase after the thoughts of a completely standalone jacuzzi, one that doesn't rely on anything else to run. "Totally going to make it mobile. That's a great idea. Maybe I should install some wheels on it? Wait no, I'll just stuff it into a seal for ease of movement. Dumbass, that shouldn't have been a question."

"Ahem." Orochimaru clears his throat. "I believe you were doing something?"

"Oh right my bad!"