No, How Can an Atheist Become a Saintess!?

EP.8

Chapter 1

Candidate and Candidate (8)

I do have beliefs. Beliefs that will probably never change, even until the moment I die. And atheism is a very significant part of those beliefs.

But, you know, my belief isn’t worth more than someone else’s life.

Whatever I say aloud—even if it were words affirming God or expressing faith—it wouldn’t change what I think inside. And even if it did? So what? It still wouldn’t be more important than saving a life that’s hanging by a thread right in front of me.

Confessing faith doesn’t deduct money from my bank account, nor does it make my body ache. Besides, I don’t even go around formally confessing my faith, yet I can still use this power. The trouble, if anything, is that people around me often jump to strange conclusions whenever they see me do it.

Maybe it’s because I’m not religious. My beliefs don’t stem from any sacred text or revered document. Like many ideas out there, which can’t be pinned down as absolute truth, I see my belief as something similarly uncertain.

I once saw a sign at a protest, held by an atheist, which read, “My views change with scientific evidence.” My beliefs are much the same: I’m confident in them, but they’re hardly a fixed answer.

I don’t think my beliefs are the perfect truth, but standing by and ignoring someone in danger—especially when I have the means to help—would just be… well, wrong. It’d be the wrong answer, plain and simple.

So, all I can do is choose the better answer.

“Ah, geez.”

I waved off another glow that insisted on illuminating my face and continued walking back to my room. After sprinting earlier, my legs felt a bit weak, and my back was damp with sweat in this cold winter air. Maybe I’d just take a shower and get some rest. When things like this happen, the Mother Superior usually excuses me from my duties.

It was Sunday anyway, so the schedule was lighter for the rest of the day.

“Oh.”

As I walked down the hallway, I spotted my veil lying on the floor. Touching my head, I realized it had slipped off. I must’ve lost it while I was running over here earlier.

I bent down to pick it up, but my balance wavered slightly. Just then, someone beside me caught my arm.

When I turned my head, I saw Ria, the one who’d grabbed my arm just a moment ago.

“……Are you okay?”

“I’m not hurt, really.”

I was a bit tired and a little dizzy, probably from the headbanging I did to shake off the light that kept beaming from the back of my head. I was also out of breath from sprinting. Plus, using that power tends to leave me exhausted. It’s one of the reasons the Mother Superior or the priest usually let me off from my duties afterward.

They say that most nuns feel drained when they use divine power.

But compared to that, my body is surprisingly resilient.

If this power posed any serious risk to me… well, I’d have probably thought twice before using it.

I placed the veil back on my head and looked at Ria, only to be a bit surprised. Her expression was unusually serious as she looked at me, still holding onto my left arm.

“What’s with the look? Are you finally going to admit that I’m a pretty amazing person?”

I teased, hoping to lighten the mood. But Ria’s brow furrowed slightly.

Not ready to go that far, huh? After all, the character “Chae-eun” has always had a stubborn pride in this story.

“Well… maybe just a little.”

That response, though, was unexpected.

“A little?”

I couldn’t help but repeat her words.

It wasn’t the word “little” that caught my attention. I repeated it because I was surprised that Ria agreed, even a little, that I was amazing.

Oh, right, she’s a hero too. And her father is a devout believer. He had quite a few connections with the church. I suppose it wasn’t all that surprising if witnessing what I did shifted her perspective even slightly.

“……”

After a brief silence, Ria suddenly released my arm.

“Yeah, just a little. Really, just a tiny bit.”

Huh.

The sudden loss of support made me stumble a bit, and I frowned as I regained my balance.

“You really are devout, aren’t you?”

If she were going to compliment me, she could’ve just done it outright. It’s not like people thank me anyway—they’re always just praying to God after I help them, never a word of gratitude for me. Not that it really matters; after all, it is technically His power, not mine.

I let out a little “hmph” and turned my head away from Ria. I adjusted the veil, making sure it was in place, and stomped off toward the room. I thought I heard laughter behind me. Just typical.

*

After washing up, I fell asleep immediately and woke up in the middle of the night. Since no one woke me up, it seemed the Mother Superior or the priest had told everyone to to let me rest.

I’d slept so soundly that I felt completely refreshed—but then my stomach growled.

…Yep, I was starving.

Having slept right through the evening, I’d missed dinner, so hunger was inevitable. I scratched my head and got up. Looking over at Ria’s bed, I saw her blanket puffed up, with a bit of her distinct red hair sticking out at the edge. Moving carefully, I slipped into my nun’s habit once again.

The reason I put on my nun’s habit… well, it’s because I really didn’t have any other options. Ria might have some casual clothes, but I’ve spent my entire life in the convent and don’t own anything other than what they provide here.

Growl.

Hearing my stomach grumble, I scratched my head and stepped outside. Since the convent isn’t a military base, there aren’t night guards, though there is a night watch for emergencies—but it’s never assigned to young nuns like us.

The dorm was utterly silent at this hour. Each room has its own bathroom, so there’s no need for anyone to be out in the halls at night. Besides, wandering around at this time is technically against the rules, and it’s customary for nuns to sleep and wake according to a set schedule. Usually, sleep is too precious for anyone to want to waste it.

“Perfect.”

That’s why this time of night is ideal for a rule-breaker like me.

I tiptoed down the hall, glancing out the windows. No one would be looking in here anyway, but still, better safe than sorry. I hadn’t even put on my veil, so if the Mother Superior caught me, I’d be in trouble. Thankfully, I made it to the counseling room without seeing anyone. There was no light spilling from under the door, so I gently opened it and slipped inside.

Reaching into my pocket, I pulled out a small flashlight. I’d bought it during a volunteer trip a few years ago, and it was just the right brightness for moments like this. I placed it on the table, clicked it on, and filled the kettle with water.

Then, I opened the door to the small storage room connected to the counseling room. It smelled musty, but it was reasonably clean—well-maintained thanks to regular tidying. In one corner, there was a large box filled with items we only used for special ceremonies.

“Here it is!”

I mumbled to myself as I opened the box and took a peek inside. I was the last one to clean out this storage room, so I knew I’d left some small instant noodle cups here from my last volunteer trip.

Technically, there were noodles set aside for night duty staff, but if I ate those, I’d be caught. As long as I cleaned up afterward, no one would notice.

Growl.

My stomach growled again. Maybe I should grab two and eat them both myself.

Humming a little tune quietly, I pulled out two cups and turned around—only to let out a surprised yelp.

It wasn’t loud, thankfully, and I quickly clamped my mouth shut, stopping myself from making a bigger sound. Luckily, I didn’t hear any footsteps racing over, so I hadn’t alerted anyone.

“Oh.”

But Ria had definitely caught me.

“…How long have you been standing there?”

“Probably since you first went into the storage room.”

“…”

Right, that explains why it felt a bit too bright inside. My little flashlight couldn’t possibly have illuminated the entire storage room.

“So, midnight snack?”

She asked, smirking.

The kettle started boiling with a bubbling sound, and just as it reached the perfect timing, it clicked off.

I hesitated for a while, weighing my options, and finally asked,

“Do you… want to join?”

“Sounds great.”

Ria laughed and stepped aside.

So annoying.

I muttered to myself as I poured the hot water into our noodles.