Not My Sins

 Bright Gold Hair

 "Yes, it does," Lily answered as she picked one of the orange-colored macaroons on her plate and stuffed it in her mouth. "From what I heard Father gave the name to him personally." 

 Rain's eyes widened in surprise, there was still so much she didn't know about the Duchy of Elderslot and the kind of person her father was, but according to her mother, she likened him to a devil.

But she didn't know if she could say the same thing yet, she had not interacted that much with the Duke. 

"Terrible," Rain muttered still looking in the direction from which the boy came. "How could someone give such a beautiful boy such a cruel name?"

"It's just a name," Lily muttered with a small smile, "Their names hold no significance, they are merely servants."

Rain felt disgusted by Lily's small comments, how could she say a person's name have no value?

"Servants are also human beings," Rain found herself in defense.

 "You're a noblewoman, you can't feel sorry for servants," Lily answered back even though she didn't believe it herself, but then her mother repeated it to her countless times when she was a child and so she had now grown accustomed to it. "Once you start to associate yourself too much with them, you would lose your respect and then they would see you as equals."

"Showing kindness isn't weakness." Rain found herself muttering, she felt her heartache for the boy, from the way he spoke, and she could tell he held a deep resentment for them but he just couldn't show it. "Do you think father was weak to accept me as his daughter?"

"This is quite different, you're father's flesh and blood, but it is not the same with someone else." Lily picked up her teacup and pulled it closer to her lips again.

"Then, is the duchess wrong for hating my existence? I am not her flesh and blood." Rain's green eyes peered into Lily's own and subconsciously Lily pulled the cup away from her lips, Rain's question sinking deeply into her. "Are you wrong for always taking my side?"

"Rain, mother, and father have their reasons for doing the things they do and I also have mine," She started picking up another macaroon and putting it in Rain's mouth instead. "You're my sister, and I believe I will always take your side no matter what is right or wrong. Now shut up and eat breakfast, we already promised Doni we would leave here as soon as we have breakfast."

Yes, indeed they did, there was something wrong with this family, and she feared that her mother might be right about him.

What kind of person is Elias Roni? What kind of people live in the Duchy?

"Thanks for having breakfast with me, Rain," Lily said with a small smile and she pulled Rain into a small hug. "Mother insists that I accompany her on a visit to Countess Audley's residence, it is in preparation for her youngest daughter's debutante ceremony which will be held in autumn."

Lily sounded excited about the ceremony already, Rain, on the other hand, couldn't feel the same excitement, she wasn't interested in the celebration and she knew she wouldn't be invited either, who wants the illegitimate daughter of the duke in their debutante to stand out like a sore thumb?

"I would try to talk to Mother to let you attend this debutante." She grinned at Rain confidently, she must have been aware of just how much her mother loved her to be so sure. "You need to start attending all these parties to enhance your social interaction amongst the noble ladies."

Rain nodded hauntingly, pulling Lily into another bone-crushing hug again, she watched Lily return to the mansion. But instead of going back towards her residence, she turned toward the stables, the one Doni returned to.

Nobody would know if she went missing for a short while, or if the bastard daughter of the Duke was in the stables with the boy she saw.

 She doubted anyone would care, but she picked up her pace, it would be bad if any of the guards saw her and then rattled to her father, just as she climbed down the hill, she spotted his golden hair from where she stood. She had never seen such fine matte of hair before, she had met with a lot of people in her life, especially high-ranking officials in the red light district her mother worked in.

But no one with such bright hair, in the tales the other courtesans told her, people born with such bright hair are descendants of the sun goddess, which is now the family that inhabits the throne. This means only the members of the royal family had golden hair as they were direct descendants of the Sun goddess.

Doni was a stables boy, yet his hair shone brightly like the sun, he was tending to the horses diligently, and from the way he worked, Rain could tell that he had been doing this for a long time. There was no way the descendants of the Emperor of Aubreun would be mopping the stables or be slaves.

His hair has to be a genetic mutation that has to be the answer to her question.

Piercing blue eyes met Rain's green ones, and they hardened as soon as they realized they had seen an intruder.

"What are you staring at?" Doni asked dropping the brush in his hands, he strolled to the other end of the pen and dragged out a tray containing dried hay for the horses. He noticed that she was still unmoving, he had heard tales from the other workers about an illegitimate daughter of the Duke.

According to the rumors surrounding them, they claimed she was identical to her father, even more, identical than Izekiel his son, and seeing her with his own two eyes now, he confirmed it.

"This isn't a place for a lady like you." He groaned as he finished distributing the dried hay to the horses. "You should go back inside."

"It must be hard," She squeaked following the initiative to go closer, he might sound or seem scary but he is just a child like her. "It must be hard to carry those heavy things all by yourself."

"Would you rather carry them instead?" He deadpanned.

"That's not what I mean," She muttered her eyes blinking nervously. "You're just a child yet you are already living like an adult."

"Once you are born a slave, status, age, or gender doesn't matter, you have to work to earn a living." He explained. "I doubt it is something a princess like yourself would understand."

"I have seen people do it…" He interrupted her sharply.

"That doesn't mean you would understand since you haven't done it yourself." He snapped back. "Did you come here to comfort me with your words? Or did you come here to mock me by acting like you're sorry for me, either way, none of them would matter since I still have much work to do."

Tears well up in her eyes, he attacked her so brutally without leaving any space for a comeback, the nobles aren't kind to her, and the servants aren't either… it's almost as if she doesn't have a place in the Duchy.

"I don't have any affection for the princesses of the estate, but I will give you some advice." He inched closer to her, and only stopped when they were a foot apart. "Don't wonder off around here alone, there are some of the slaves who have a grudge against the Duke, they wouldn't hesitate to rip you apart limb to limb, and after all, you are nothing but an illegitimate child, the Duke might not even bat an eye."

 Rain's eyes widened and more tears well in them, she bit down on her lips and glared hard at Doni who had an expressionless look on his face.

"Do you hate me now?" He teased the upper part of his lips forming a smirk. "I had barely said anything but your goody two-shoes attitude is already off."

"I came here because I felt sorry for you."

"No one asked you to." He retorted.

"I know," she sniffed back the tears. "But I still feel sorry for you, and seeing you work such heavy jobs makes me even sadder because I could never do them."

She started sobbing.

"I thought about how lucky I am to be brought here as the Duke's daughter, and how pitiful you are to be born a slave," she wiped her teary face with the ends of her sleeves. "I just wanted to give you a bit of encouragement."

 "I never asked for your encouragement, I don't even want it," he stepped away from her, it was the first time he had seen a noblewoman cry, miserably at that. "You're so ugly when you cry, so I beg you please stop." 

He strolled towards the horses and then proceeded to ignore Rain, the look in his eyes was of complete hatred, but just like her mother, Rain could tell that the person Doni hated wasn't her but her father.

"I will leave this here," She dropped the wrapped cloth on the wooden rack, just where Doni hung the saddles, "Goodbye."

Doni refused to turn back until she had left, and when he was sure she was gone, he walked towards the rack, picked the floral handkerchief she left on one of the saddles, and unwrapped it.

There were three pieces of Macaroons in the cloth, he scoffs in disgust.

"As if I would eat anything given to me by the offspring of that devil." He walked towards the horse dung he cleared in the barrow and threw the cloth in the pile of horse shit. "Arrogant and loud just like her father."