The Gendered Crown: Rise of the Felinor Lady

We passed under the risen gates of our destination. As we did, a wave of noise hit me—orders shouted, boots pounding on the muddy ground, and crackling fire pits filling the air. The barrage of sounds made me shake my head to stay focused. Luckily, the pouch around my neck kept any smells in check.

As we entered the camp, we were jostled into groups. “Males to the left and females to the right!” shouted a man in armor with a scar. On instinct, I began to head left, but someone grabbed my hand.

It was Kira from before. She pointed to where the women started to group up. “Let’s go; it would be bad if they got angry.”

It took me a moment to realize what she was saying as she dragged me backward. I would’ve fallen over had I not had improved reflexes but quickly caught myself. We walked over to the group of women and saw everyone huddling together. My first thought was that it must be a defense response to the trauma we were all going through. The instinct to group together—I never felt that pull as a man. Now, however, I kind of did but resisted the urge and stood apart from the group, albeit by only a few feet.

As everyone was slowly and loudly being separated into our groups, a hush began to cover the field. Bells rang as a man in white robes emerged from the central eastern building. He walked toward a raised platform with authority. His voice was surprisingly quiet, yet it seemed to carry across the field.

“You are all safe now. The soldiers have done their duty admirably.” He faced the guards, clasped his hands together, and nodded slightly. “Now everyone, please relax, eat, and rest. Many of you are weary. The mess hall is open to feed our new arrivals, and once that is done, our priestesses will guide you to your accommodations. After a night’s rest, we will begin your assimilation into this world.”

He paused, glancing at the guards. “We must work together to ensure a smooth transition for everyone. Trust is essential for all of us. I know many of you may have fears, but you are safe here. We understand the pain you have experienced, and we will do our best to support you in rebuilding what has been lost.”

With that said, he descended the platform. I could visibly see the guards—or soldiers—begin to relax. Most of the Felinor started to head to the mess hall, though there was a distinct separation between the men and women.

I began to walk toward the mess hall but decided I wasn’t really all that hungry. I turned and looked back at the gate to the path we had just trodden down. A part of me wanted to leave; something about this place, being surrounded by these walls, bothered me. But I didn’t even know where I was. Could I trust these people? Most humans I had met so far seemed hostile. Could I trust this Elric character? As I pondered, I heard footsteps approaching me. I turned my head toward the individual.

She waved. “Hey, we have food waiting. Why don’t you come eat? Get inside and release some tension.”

I stared at her for a moment before responding. “I’m not hungry.”

“I can understand that. Well, how about I take you to your quarters? You can relax and sleep. Surely you are exhausted after everything you have gone through.”

I shook my head. “I... I don’t really know what to do, but I’m not sure I am tired.” It was true. Even after the trek down the mountain, all the running and commotion, I really didn’t feel that tired.

She sighed, and suddenly weariness appeared on her face. “Look, um... I’m Katrina. You are?”

“Landon,” I responded on instinct.

“Landon, look. It is not safe for you to be out here alone. We had to send a lot of soldiers up that hill to get everyone safely down. That mountain has some very dangerous beasts crawling through it, and these men,” she gestured to the tents where the soldiers were, “would love nothing more than to take it out on a Felinor. Relations are improving, but they’re not anywhere close to what they need to be.”

“Are you saying they will hurt me?”

She started tapping her foot. “Please,” she insisted, her tone firm yet kind. “It’s not just about food. Being out alone at night can be dangerous, especially for someone as... striking as you.”

It took me a minute to process what she was saying. Then it hit me, heat rushing to my cheeks at her words. It made sense in a sick kind of way, but it was not something I had ever thought about. Before, walking around was just something I did. Sure, the thoughts of a mugging crossed my mind, but nothing more than that. I felt my tail start to flick back and forth.

“Look, I know this is hard. I know you’re confused and probably a little bit angry. Trust me, I know. Most of us here are like you. We are not native here too, but you have to trust us if you want to survive.” She somehow started to look even more tired. “There is no way home, but you are not alone in this.”

I looked back at the gate, then the tents that surrounded the field we stood in. I nodded. “Okay.”

Katrina looked relieved and began walking in the opposite direction from the mess hall toward another building. She sped up as I got closer. We crossed through the grounds with the tents, and I could feel the eyes of the men on me. Most of them seemed angry, but a few... well, their eyes made my hair stand on edge.

Katrina must’ve sensed my unease. “Things are better now than they used to be. Trust me.”

As Katrina led me toward my quarters, the sun began to fade. The camp buzzed with guards lighting fires and laughing, the air thick with tension. I stole glances at them, their eyes darting our way. Katrina caught the men staring at us and gave me a weak smile.

As we approached the building, I heard many feet moving inside, sounding purposeful yet hurried. When we opened the door, my suspicions were confirmed. We stood at the entrance of a common area lined with alcoves on either side. Women in robes rushed back and forth, tending to a fire blazing in the center of the room.

Katrina led me to a corner where a set of stairs was tucked away. We ascended them and stepped onto a second floor that mirrored the first. Walking to the opposite corner, she pulled aside a sheet covering an alcove that revealed a small bed and chair. “This will be your quarters,” she explained. “If you need to relieve yourself, please visit the first floor. In the morning, we’ll wake you and help you get ready. After that, you’ll be split into groups, and you can start your new life here.”

I took a deep breath, trying to steady my racing thoughts. “Okay, when do I get to start asking questions? It feels like so much has happened with so little information. I...” I stammered, struggling to find the right words.

Katrina nodded, settling into the chair within the alcove and pulling the cloth shut behind her. “Sit. Let’s get you some answers.” She gestured to the small bed beside her.

I hesitated for a moment, then sank into the bed, feeling its softness beneath me. “What’s going on? Why was I summoned? Why... why did it have to be as a woman?” The last question burst from me, heavy with confusion and desperation.

Katrina's eyes widened, her surprise palpable. “Wait, are you asking why you were transformed into a woman?” she asked, her voice catching slightly.

I felt heat rise to my face, realizing how bluntly I had asked it. “I... I didn’t mean to—”

“Oh, I… I wasn’t expecting that,” she stammered, her discomfort evident. “Transformations like yours can happen, though they’re quite rare. But this... this is significant. We’ll need to have a serious talk about your gender change later, including safety around men. You’ll also be expected to help rebuild the Felinor population—”

At that, I felt my heart drop, confusion flooding my mind. “Wait, what?”

Katrina caught herself, noticing the look of bewilderment on my face. “I mean, it’s just... you’ve joined a community trying to rebuild after the devastation,” she quickly added, shifting the focus. “The Felinor were nearly wiped out by a sickness during the war with humans, and they need individuals like you to help them rebuild.”

“Help them rebuild…” I echoed, the weight of her words settling over me. “But I don’t know how to live like this. I’m scared.”

Katrina leaned closer, her voice softening. “It’s okay to be scared. You’ve handled everything remarkably well so far, considering the circumstances. It’s normal to feel lost right now. That’s why those who were summoned before you are here—they understand what you’re going through. Yes, this may be your new home, but you’ll get through it and become stronger. Who knows what amazing things you might discover in this world?”

Her words lingered in the air, slowly calming my racing thoughts. I took a deep breath, the knot in my chest loosening just a bit. “Is there really no way back home?” I asked, my heart sinking at the thought of permanence.

She shook her head gently. “No, not now. This is your home. But we will help you navigate this new life. You are not alone in this, Landon.”

I nodded slowly, still grappling with the reality of my situation. “I don’t even know what to expect,” I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper.

Katrina smiled gently. “You’ll learn. Every day will bring new challenges, but also new opportunities. Just remember, the Felinor are resilient. They’ve faced loss before, but they’re determined to rebuild and forge a better future.”

I swallowed hard, a wave of emotions washing over me. I was a stranger in a foreign land, transformed into someone I didn’t fully understand. The fear of the unknown loomed large, but there was a flicker of hope in Katrina’s words.

“I guess I’ll just have to take it one day at a time, then,” I said, forcing a smile.

“Exactly,” she replied, her eyes shining with encouragement. “Tomorrow, we’ll gather everyone and begin the process of integrating you all into the community. You’ll meet others like you and learn how to navigate this new life together.”

“What if they don’t accept me?” The thought clung to me like a shadow.

“Trust me, they will,” Katrina assured me. “The Felinor value community and support. They’ve been through so much, just like you. They’ll understand your struggles, and you’ll find allies among them.”

As I sat there, contemplating her words, a sense of determination began to stir within me. Maybe this new life could offer something I hadn’t anticipated—a chance for growth, friendship, and healing.

“Thank you, Katrina,” I said earnestly. “For everything.”

She waved off the praise with a smile. “Just remember, we’re in this together. Now, get some rest. You’ll need your strength for tomorrow.”

With that, she stood, leaving me alone in the quiet of my alcove. I lay back on the soft bed, staring at the ceiling above. The world outside felt daunting, but I knew I had to face it. Taking a deep breath, I closed my eyes, letting the exhaustion of the day wash over me. For the first time since everything had changed, I allowed myself to drift into sleep, holding onto the hope that this was all just a dream.

A meadow surrounded me while being bathed in moonlight. A haunting melody played that tugged at my heart. I began to feel my heart beat quicken. Panic gripped me, my breaths coming in quick bursts. Who am I? What am I? It's too hard, its not worth it. "Maybe I should just let everything go" I sobbed as I was crushed beneath the mountain of my emotions.

Just then, I felt a hand on my shoulder, warm and reassuring. I turned to see a beautiful Felinor woman before me, her face obscured but her presence calming. Her dark blue tail swayed gracefully behind her. “It’s okay, Lira,” she whispered, her voice a soothing balm to my racing thoughts. “You are not alone. Embrace the change. It will be alright.”

Her words wrapped around me like a protective cocoon, grounding me in that moment. The chaos inside me began to subside, replaced by a comforting sense of belonging. I wanted to ask her so many questions, but as I reached out, the dream began to fade.

Suddenly, I awoke with a start, the remnants of the dream clinging to my consciousness. I opened my eyes to find a priestess standing over me, concern etched across her face.