The Salvatore Saga, Part Four: My new Life

The searing pain of a bite was the first sensation that pierced my consciousness as I attempted to stir. The bite, or perhaps the resulting pain, was in my arm, but as I shifted, the burning sensation spread to my neck. My thigh also throbbed with ache, and then a rush of warmth, velvet like surged through my veins, clouding my thoughts once more.

I couldn't recall how many times I had wrested myself from the clutches of this warmth, only to be overcome by it again. It was not yet time for me to fully awaken.

I had vague memories of feeling unwell, of being cold and trembling, and of someone whispering or cursing softly by my ear when they realized I was awake. As always, my stubbornness made it difficult for them to keep me subdued, especially when the fever raged through my body, burning away the velvet and forcing the Salvatores into a sort of coma.

Sometimes, they didn't immediately notice my awakening until I began to squirm and writhe, causing their teeth to dislodge and rouse them to bite into me once more, plunging me back into unconsciousness.

When I finally opened my eyes, I found myself alone in bed, still feeling quite disoriented. It took me a moment to realize that I was in my bedroom. The soft, pink gauzy curtains allowed the sunlight to filter through, illuminating the colorful leaves of the trees outside.

Summer had given way to autumn, indicating that I had been ill for quite some time. I made an effort to move, but groaned as my muscles felt weak and feeble. I managed to lift my hand, which appeared skeletal and frail, a testament to my weakened state.

I tried to piece together what had occurred, recalling the conversation with Number Two about their decision to break away from the Salvatore hive, at least partially. 

 What would it bring to me or to this pack? I had no idea, and I wasn't in the mood to even speculate. Right now, I was moving gingerly and slowly, feeling some sensations all over my body. I felt weak and feeble, making me roll my eyes.

Again, I was weak as a kitten, far from being the powerful Amazonian who could take over the world. But I knew I had time. I just had to be patient, even though it messed with my mind.

As I grunted and shifted in bed, the door of the room opened and Damon, Mariella, Wulfe, and Number Two walked in. Each of them looked at me sharply, clearly unimpressed by my actions. But then again, I didn't have much of a choice, did I? Damon approached me, placed his hands under my legs and shoulders, and gently lifted me to sit up in bed.

In a quiet and determined voice, he said, "I spent five weeks sinking my teeth into your neck, and before that, the Salvatores spent a few weeks, too. So yeah, you're weak, and it'll take some effort for you to get better."

I nodded and replied, "I understand you're upset, really, I do. I..."

Mariella raised her eyebrow, came to sit next to me, and declared, "My infection was child's play compared to yours. Next time, this won't happen. You can be sure of that."

I took a deep breath. Fine, they were upset, and it had been a bad situation, but they needed to hear what I had to say.

I spoke calmly, "I'm not trying to make excuses or anything, but let me give you the facts before you tear me apart, and maybe we can find new ways to handle this in the future."

Damon sat down next to me, while Wulfe and Number Two joined us on the bed, all ears.

I began, "Firstly, I had no symptoms at the start. Then we had thousands of cubs. I had over 1200 cubs across five litters, each with 200-300 cubs. And let's not forget about the wolves, Mariella's, and the girls' cubs. Despite the magic house's help, we needed every pair of hands."

Damon nodded, and Wulfe weakly smiled. He had been there.

 I continued to explain, even though it took some effort. "When I started experiencing symptoms, I didn't know what to do. All the vampires capable of providing dental care were busy, and you had managed to panic ten Salvatores. It was pointless to ask them for help. Adam, Charles, and the boys were preoccupied with their own tasks, leaving no one available for me,"

Mariella said, looking at me. "But Colin, Wulfe, and the others were at the magic house, surely..."

I raised my hand. "As this infection had affected Elena and Katherine, who are not magical or energy creatures, it would also affect others. Since no Salvatore was available, I took on the responsibility of keeping my pack safe as the pack leader," I explained.

Wulfe nodded and said, "I understand. There wasn't much help available for you, was there?"

I shook my head.

Number two chimed in, "From now on, that won't happen. We are free, so the panic of the number one won't affect us. We have come up with a way to monitor your situation and ensure your well-being."

I looked at him with curiosity.

Number one spoke up, "I hope, sincerely, that I could be the one handling this, but this situation has reminded me of my priorities during a crisis. I have to give number two credit for this."

Number two then took a pendant from around his neck and muttered a few words. Suddenly, the rest of my powers seemed to drain from my body. I groaned, unsure of what had just happened. With a few more words, I began to feel a bit better.

Wulfe explained, "It's a simple spell. When you activate the pendant, it disables your ability to hide your condition and allows us to conduct tests to ensure your health. It's as simple as that."

I had no response. Part of me was furious, seeing this as a weakness as capital W. But another part recognized their love, concern for my well-being, and their determination to keep me safe, even from myself.

However, my suspicious side couldn't help but wonder if they might abuse this power over me, using it for their own amusement or for other reasons. It irritated me to think of this as another weakness.

But what could I do? Nothing at all. There was literally nothing for me to do except accept this new reality and find ways to cope with it. 

Damon said to me, "I understand that this must be terrible for you, another weakness to deal with. But baby, you were in a terrible state. I know you didn't have many options, but from now on, the Salvatores are here for you. We have ways to check on you, even if you don't want us to, and we're not going to let this happen again. It's non-negotiable."

Mariella added, "Damon is right. It always took one of us to keep your straps tight so that others could treat your infection and help you recover. You're still weak, so you need to take it easy, but we're here to support you."

I nodded, attempting to move but groaning because I didn't have the strength to do it on my own.

Number two lifted me into a better position and said, "It may take days, maybe even a few weeks, for you to fully recover, but we've got you. We're more than ready to help you."

I sighed and said, "I hate being this weak. I can't even pull myself up to sit."

Damon smiled at me and reassured me, "Patience, my love. You'll get there. Everything will be alright. Right now, you weigh 31 kilos with no muscles. It was tough for you, so you need to eat, rest, and let us help you."

Rolling my eyes, I replied, "As if I have any other choice."

Wulfe also smiled. The bed was soft, and the bedroom looked nice, but I couldn't help feeling frustrated about my weakness.

Damon said as they got off the bed, "Now, baby, rest up. I'll go get you a hearty meal, something to chew on. After that, you'll take a bath and then rest. You're still as weak as a newborn kitten, and you need to sleep. I can assure you that your life will be calm for now."

I nodded, and Wulfe said to me, "I feel like I let you down. How the hell did I miss this? I was supposed to sense it better. But let's make sure this doesn't happen again in the future."

I replied, "I'm just really good at hiding, and I had no choice. I had to keep going because too many people depended on me."

Mariella chimed in, "Next time, this won't happen. You're not responsible for the whole damn pack. You might be the power battery of the pack, but I've set some limits on your energy so you can't give so much anymore. Not unless I give you permission. Not even Damon can take too much from you."

I was actually quite surprised. Mariella's expression was tense, and her body language showed irritation. I wasn't sure if it was because she wanted to go to the Azores and my illness was preventing her, or if there was something else bothering her. 

Mariella looked at me and said, "We have changed, haven't we? I used to dream of vacationing in the Azores, but since you got sick, it's not the same. You are my alpha, our alpha female, and the entire pack feels your presence. We all want to help you. You are our top priority now, so you need to start learning to rely on our hive. It's the way things are, and you can't change it."

I nodded, realizing that the hive had indeed changed everything. There was no longer much room for me to hide or keep to myself. The entire pack was always aware of me, and that was just how it was now. It was my new reality.

It's funny how I hadn't really thought about it before, but it had become crystal clear. And with this new stone affecting my powers, they would know if I tried to hide my condition again. Did this vulnerability make me weak or loved? What was the scariest thing about it?

I had my trust issues, and this situation only amplified them. But maybe it was time for me to face them, to learn to love and trust, and to let the pack help me. I might be the strongest or most resilient creature in the universe, but that didn't mean I had to face everything alone.

I just had to learn to adapt to this new way of living within the pack, allowing others to care for me, even if it meant showing my weaknesses and depending on their support.

What was the worst that could happen? They might leave me, but deep down, I knew some would never abandon me. In fact, I suspected no one would leave me; they would only smother me with their care. It would require patience on my part to allow them to care for me.

Knowing myself, I was aware that I would try to push myself to act as soon as I could. But when I was weak and unable to take action, I might become snappy and frustrated. Well, let's see how many of them could handle my outbursts as I let my emotions run free.

As Damon and the others went to prepare a meal for me, I suddenly realized that I needed to use the bathroom urgently. My bladder was about to burst. Surely, I could manage this on my own.

I grunted and groaned as I slowly maneuvered myself to sit on the edge of the bed. Oh my God, I was exhausted. I grabbed onto the nightstand and pulled myself up, only to collapse back onto the bed as my legs refused to support me.

Okay, let's give it another try. It was my fifth attempt at staying upright and taking an actual step. I hobbled into the bathroom and barely made it to the toilet before I had to pee.

Unfortunately, my nightgown was underneath me and I ended up wetting it. I sat there, groaning and sighing, before finally managing to take it off and throwing it on the floor. I knew I should get back to bed, but I was so weak that my arms shook as I tried to stand up.

Eventually, my legs obeyed, and I took a step, only to have them give out and flop onto the hard bathroom floor, hurting my ass.

"Fucking freaking shit!" I cursed as I sat there, unable to move.

I attempted to move again, but then my bowel decided to empty itself as well. There I sat, in the middle of the bathroom, in my own mess, unable to move. However, I didn't tell anyone.

I was trying to reach the bidet shower and cursing and cussing, when I accidentally dropped a bottle of hand soap on the floor. Soon, I heard footsteps approaching, and Dresden walked in.

He looked at me and said, "Let me help you."

In my messed-up voice, I replied, "I've soiled myself. I'm a mess and I can't even get up."

He nodded and lifted me into the shower. There was a chair where I could sit and shower while he adjusted the water. Dresden began rinsing the floor when Damon walked in. He took one sniff of the air and nodded at Dresden.

Damon then said to me, "Come on, baby. Let's get you into a clean room and have something to eat. You know, you have to tell me when you need to use the bathroom."

He washed my hair and body, wrapped me in a towel, and carried me to another room. It was a clean, light violet room with soft velvet curtains and a thick comforter on an enormous bed. Damon gently placed me on the bed and brought me a clean nightgown.

He said to me, "You know, I think you need someone to be with you all the time. And I might be the one to do that."

I rolled my eyes and exclaimed, "I wet my nightgown, fell on the floor, soiled myself. What else can possibly happen to me?"

He smiled and reassured me, "You are who you are, but I am here for you as your husband. Don't worry, you will regain your strength, but it will take some time."

He brought a tray filled with food and placed it on my lap. I picked up a fork and began to eat, although it was tiring. Not wanting to watch my feeble attempt to feed myself for too long, he proceeded to feed me.

After finishing the meal, I felt exhausted. I wasn't certain how long it would take for me to fully recover, but I sarcastically acknowledged that at least I had a supportive pack to care for me.

As I pondered how many of my pack members would witness my bodily functions and weakness, it occurred to me that once I was back on my feet, everyone would likely rely on me and my care. Despite being the only weak pack member, unable to bathe or feed me, I took solace in the fact that at least someone would be there to care for me.

Even without any babies, my care would demand their patience and time. This was my life, and Damon sat by my side, nourishing me. After he had finished feeding me, he placed the tray on the table and pulled me into his embrace.

Listening to his heartbeat and feeling his warm, strong body next to mine, I drifted off to sleep. I was safe in his arms, able to be weak, knowing he would take care of me.