Vaudevillain

VV4, 42 - New Minions



“So, what would a new Jacques look like?” Dylan asked as he and Jack meandered back to his mansion.

“A secretary in a pencil skirt,” Jack answered. “But with the same proportions as a regular Jacques.”

Dylan snorted a laugh. “With the sexy glasses look?”

“Oh so your first though of a Jacques in a pencil skirt is that its sexy?” Jack ribbed.

“What? No,” Dylan backpedaled. “I thought that’s what you were going for? I was only trying to complete the look.”

“Sure you were,” Jack teased.

“Besides. A Jacques in a pencil skirt wouldn’t be sexy,” Dylan said. “And it’d rip it in half the minute anything crazy happened.”

“Just a secretary then,” Jack shrugged.

“No,” Dylan said with a shake of his head. “That sounds more like Dextra than Dr. Zlo. Besides, I already have something of a theme.”

“Oh?” Jack asked.

“High society is the idea,” Dylan said. “Cass is a butler, Mabel an old socialite, Brunhilde is a maid, Quartet is something like a butler’s apprentice maybe? The Jacques are all just household staff.”

“Then why not use an Egghead for the management portion?” Jack asked.

Dylan thought about it. “I could, but it’s more fun to have a new minion, don’t you think?”

“Oh definitely,” Jack said.

“I guess this time the minion is something of a personal assistant,” Dylan said.

“I don’t think you can make them a Jacques then, can you?” Jack asked. “Personal assistants tend to only be the one.”

“Maybe I’ll just stick with and Egghead then,” Dylan said.

“Well, you can think about it some more while I get some work done,” Jack said. “Then I can help you get the materials for whatever you decide.”

“As your character?” Dylan asked.

“Oh no, I got a new idea in mind,” Jack answered. “I think you’re personally going to love it.”

“Oh come on, you can’t just tease me like that,” Dylan said. “Not without a hint.”

Jack smirked. “Nope, you’ll just have to wait and see.”

Dylan huffed. “Fine then, keep your secrets.”

“I will, thank you very much,” Jack laughed.

The two walked into Dr. Zlo’s mansion and down into his laboratory.

“Cass!” Dr. Zlo shouted. “I have a guest over. Be sure we aren’t interrupted!”

“You got it, boss!” Cass answered.

After kicking a group of curious Jacques out, the two players went to work. Jack pulled out a number of materials, placing them on the various tables as she talked to herself.

“This won’t be difficult, not really,” Jack said. “I’ve already got blueprints for a bunch of trackers. At this point its a manner of flavor.”

“Cufflinks then,” Dylan said. “It’s something Dr. Zlo would make to hand out.”

“Sounds good,” Jack said.

While she went to work, Dylan mused over his minion idea. An Egghead would be fine, sure, but Dylan wanted the event to have a bit more pizazz to it. Eggheads were fine and all, but they wouldn’t be much of a threat to any heroes intent on saving their fellows. That meant he needed something stronger.

Maybe something with Phlebotinium?

But he had to make sure the minion came back, just in case a hero destroyed them in the fight. Which actually led him to another question.

“Hey, what’s the liklihood that my invention gets destroyed by some heroes in the fight?” Dylan asked.

“Probably pretty high,” Jack answered. “Personally, I was thinking you should have a shield or something protecting it.”

“That or I actually make more than one,” Dylan muttered.

He paced around the room. He could combine the two. Make a minion that protected his invention even after it passed. No, that didn’t solve the issue. The machine wasn’t likely to be destroyed if his minions were alive anyway.

“Maybe a cloning power?” he muttered. “Or something like an apprentice who can fix the machine?”

“A mechanic or handyman would be good,” Jack answered. “Having someone who can actually fix Dr. Zlo’s inventions would be good.”

“It kinda goes against Dr. Zlo’s ethos though,” Dylan replied. “He’s an unparalleled genius who thinks no one could ever match him.”

Jack waved a wrench around. “You don’t really need him to match Dr. Zlo. If anything, all you’d need to do is make it so the handyman can’t fix something that Dr. Zlo hasn’t given him blueprints for.”

“Hmm, yeah,” Dylan said. “That could work.”

He opened his power tab, arranging and rearranging what he wanted until he was satisfied with the requirements.

Kurt the Handyman

A minion of Dr. Zlo’s built to be the ultimate fixer when the villain is unable to attend to his machines. While he has no creativity of his own, he has a knack for finding the issues in devices and with a blueprint from Dr. Zlo can easily repair anything of his that breaks. However, the minion does have a tendency to try and ‘fix’ common household items, often trying to give them more power for more efficiency.

Hammer (1)

Faded white shirt (1)

Crumpled Polo Shirt (1)

Blue Jeans (1)

Duct Tape (1)

Sciencium (5g)

“That’ll do it,” Dylan said.

He read the description out to Jack.

“Why give him that bit at the end?” Jack asked.

“One, it sounds funny. And two, I wanted to make sure they had something to do if I was away,” Dylan answered.

“Aw, look at you, caring for your virtual minions,” Jack cooed.

“Shh,” Dylan said. “Don’t let them hear you. Dr. Zlo isn’t someone who cares for his minions.”

“Haha, alright you big softy,” Jack answered.

Dylan just rolled his eyes. But Jack was right. He’d started to think of the minions differently after losing Mabel the first time. He hadn’t even followed through on his threats to Quartet for insubordination, and Dylan knew for a fact that the minion hadn’t done his due diligence when it came to his duties.

“So most of the materials are clothes,” Dylan said. “Which is giving me an idea.”

“Let me guess, is Dr. Zlo about to rob some clothing stores?” Jack asked.

Dylan smiled. “Better, I think we need to show the world what true fashion looks like.”

The player marched up the stairs. “Cass!”

“Yeah, boss?” the butler said as he appeared by his side.

“I need you to fire up the fabricators. I have a new scheme in mind! One so fiendishly devious the heroes won’t know what to do!”

“You got it, boss!” Cass answered. “What do you want made?”

“Make as many of my suits as you can! That includes the top hat, monocle, and tie!” Dr. Zlo turned with a flourish. “Yes, truly a devious plan. Tell me, Cass, why do you think the heroes have such an easy time thwarting my plans?”

“Well boss—“ Cass started.

“It’s because I am the only one with a sense of fashion!” Dr. Zlo exclaimed. “While the ignorant masses plod around in their jeans, and sweatpants I lord over them with my superior senses! But because of this, the heroes are instantly able to spot me! Well, no longer! Once we replace all the clothing in stores with my own, the heroes will be unable to tell me apart from the masses, thus ensuring my victory!”

“Wow, boss!” Cass said. “And here I thought it was because you always underestimated everyone.”

Dr. Zlo shot Cass a look. “Just get to creating.”

“You got it, boss!” Cass answered.

Dr. Zlo stomped back down the stairs into Jack’s awaiting smile.

“I take it you like the idea?” Dylan asked.

“I love the idea,” Jack laughed. “And it’s the perfect idea for me to introduce my new villainous character.”

Dylan laughed and threw his hands wide. “Well, then, let us be off!”

“Hold your horses,” Jack said. “I’m not quite done with all these trackers.”

“Ah, whoops,” Dylan said. “Then I’ll go get the Zlomobile ready for departure and leave you to it.”

“Sounds good,” Jack said. “This won’t take much longer. Then I can show you my new character.”

“Can’t wait,” Dylan laughed.


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