chapter 25
Luna Square.
Unlike existing shopping malls, it is equipped with facilities like a movie theater, so it is a complex leisure facility designed to enjoy various cultural experiences as well as shopping.
This facility, which was built by benchmarking the concept of Malling, which was popular in foreign countries, was functioning as a proud landmark of a region with annual sales exceeding 1 trillion won… … . If you think about it, this is also a work by the Beyond group.
Anyway, Midsummer and I were walking out there.
“hey.”
“uh.”
“Don’t walk while looking at your phone, there are a lot of people, and then you get hurt.”
The answer doesn’t come back. He was fiddling around with his hair with the selfie camera on his phone.
The voluminous medium-sized hair that went down to the shoulder and the neatly trimmed bangs, unlike before, sway softly, exuding an innocent atmosphere.
“If you like it that much, can I take a picture for you?”
Midsummer looked at my face with anger as if not to say nonsense, and then shifted his gaze to the phone again.
“It would be better to take a picture for you. If I wash my hair tomorrow morning, that feeling won’t come out. You have to take care of yourself with an iron, can you remember?”
still no answer
“Girl, if you ignore me like that, I feel sorry for you. No matter how much her body is her attendant—”
“do not do that.”
Midsummer looks at me with a disgusted expression, imitating Oh Cheong-myung’s tone and gestures.
“Stop it, girl. If the guy who complained about it before saying it was ruined doesn’t say anything, he’s going to stare at you all day.”
“I never did.”
At my point, Midsummer nervously puts the smartphone in.
“And it was because it was interesting rather than liked.”
“okay.”
I decided not to ask any further questions. Midsummer looked around the mall without saying a word for a while before opening his mouth.
“Don’t do that. It all shows up on your face anyway.”
“what. If you like it, you probably do it, so why do you have to ask why?”
Midsummer shook her head as if she wasn’t pointing out that and continued.
“You don’t have to pretend to be calm.”
“Do you want some tea?”
“Not a lot, but a little. Who says what? If it happened yesterday, I would be concerned.”
“is it.”
I opened my mouth as I stretched.
“Still, it’s better to be shivering than to be depressed. in many ways.”
“Yes, do whatever you want.”
Midsummer shrugged and replied.
“But where are we now? I’ve cut my hair too, can’t I just dig it out?”
“To buy clothes.”
“dress? you bought it last time Are there a lot of them in the motel?”
“You were so insistent that you only bought a hoodie and jeans.”
“Why?”
Midsummer closes his eyes with a stupid expression.
“I don’t go to places that have to be formal, but a hoodie and jeans are a bit too much.”
“is it?”
Midsummer tilts her head. The fluttering hair along his head blended with his whitish face, exuding a strange aura.
If you keep your mouth shut, you can say that you are really a lady.
We took the escalator and went to the floor where the clothing store was gathered.
“Oh, don’t go to Uniqlo.”
At those words, the footsteps of midsummer, who were moving with plumpness, freeze. The gnome answered, turning his neck with a stiff movement as if it had rusted.
“… … why?”
“It’s set as Minseo’s cousin, so even if it’s not a luxury item, you should wear it in moderation. Then you get suspicious.”
“Then where should I go? I don’t know if it’s there or not.”
As if I had misunderstood myself while organizing my thoughts for a while, Midsummer started to wiggle her fingers as if something was wrong.
“I never came out to buy something like this, so what should I do? It wasn’t because I wanted to be like this.”
“Who says what? But come to think of it, for the past few years, I have only worn what Dasom noona bought me. I don’t know where to go because I’m going somewhere else.”
“Okay, so let’s just go to Uniqlo. It doesn’t matter what clothes are important, as long as you can wear them.”
“So, I’m going to take a look around today. I want to study too.”
“What?”
I grabbed Midsummer’s cuff and walked to the clothing store next to the escalator. It was the intention to go in and see.
“Hey, can you help me for a second?”
“Ah yes. Sure. How can I help you? Is there anything you are looking for?”
The female clerk who slipped at my call began to pour out various questions to the point of being burdensome, but Midsummer standing in the back didn’t say anything and just licked her lips quietly.
It was completely different from when I bought a cell phone by closely scrutinizing it at the dealership, and I laughed out loud.
“It’s no different, because my younger brother doesn’t know anything about clothes. It was a pity to wear only a hoodie every day, so I pulled it out, but now that I think about it, I don’t know much about women’s clothes either.”
“Hey, whoever you like—.”
Midsummer stabbed me in the side with her forearm. But I didn’t care and continued the conversation with the clerk.
“Oh~! That’s right. I think the brothers and sisters get along really well. Come buy some clothes on the weekend too!”
“No, not like that—”
“Anyway, I’m really sorry. You wore a hoodie every day with a face like this. Come on over here. I’ll pick a few. Well, let’s see, let’s see… … .”
“Wait. Hey Yoo-Jin! Even with you, I’ll be still… … .”
I grinned at the midsummer who was dragged by the clerk and stared at me with a resentful gaze, then moved to the side where men’s clothes were displayed.
I want to look around other places, but it will only have the opposite effect if I forcefully dragged him around in the current state. Today, I plan to end it here.
“Hmm… … .”
He chose a black linen shirt and ivory-colored cotton pants. Other than that, I picked a few more combinations that are casual but not too light-hearted.
I’m going to stop by the shoe store later and buy some matching shoes. Fitflop slippers would be appropriate.
“Hey, brother! Can you come over here for a second?”
The loud voice of the clerk came from the try-on room inside the store.
“… … why… I was just trying to change clothes again.”
“… … No… Now that I have chosen it, I have to show it to my brother.”
“… … Strange though—”
Two people’s voices could be heard from near the small hallway leading to the dressing room, but I couldn’t hear them in detail.
“Can I come in?”
“Okay then! Come on in.”
Following the clerk’s words, as soon as he went inside through the corner of the hallway, the door to the try-on room closed with a bang.
“Is it all over?”
“Oh~… … I have chosen everything. Hey, younger brother~ Oppa is here, so please come out quickly~ Then you can open it with the key~.”
Midsummer, who had been arguing with the clerk in the try-on room for such a long time, let out a sigh as if he was exhausted and slowly opened the door.
“How are you?”
“Five… … .”
A light blue short-sleeved striped T-shirt and a long skirt with ivory color catch my eye.
Overall, the combination of bright colors and soft materials gave a pure and fresh feeling that was 180 degrees different from usual.
Now, I have to say that I feel a bit old-fashioned.
“It’s a pity that my brother insists on only dull colors, so I tried to combine them with fresh colors~! I picked it, but it’s really good, isn’t it?”
Midsummer was nervously brushing her hair with her head bowed as if annoyed.
“It’s good. Please payment.”
“Yes, thank you! I also picked out a few street-style clothes, so keep that in mind when purchasing from other stores. Even if I choose just like this, I’m halfway there~!”
“thank you.”
bang!
While me and the clerk were talking, the door to the try-on room closed again with a loud noise.
“Huh? Brother, you can wear it as it is!”
“It’s okay.”
Midsummer came out of the clothing store and looked at me with dissatisfied eyes while holding the hoodie she was wearing with both hands.
Of course he didn’t respond. whatever.
“What is ‘Oh’? … . Is the pervert bastard really out of his mind… … .”
* * *
“Okay now, let’s go home… … .”
“One more last place.”
“You said that before… … .”
Midsummer, with his shoulders drooping, said in a crawling voice.
Even after purchasing clothes, he stopped by shoe stores and accessory stores to shop around, so the midsummer next to Yu-Jin is already exhausted. All he could do was walk softly like a jellyfish crushed by the strong waves.
The footsteps could only be stopped when they reached the bookstore next to the toy store.
“Why is the book all of a sudden?”
“I thought it would be nice if I could study again.”
“study?”
“design. It was something I liked, but after I started the company, I hadn’t touched it for several years.”
Yu-Jin Yu started looking through the books in front of the shelves where design books were gathered.
Read at nobelmtl.com
“If you have a book you want to buy, go pick it up. It doesn’t matter if it’s a comic book or something.”
At Yu Yu-jin’s words, Han Yeo-reum lifted her head and looked around the inside of the bookstore.
Various people were choosing books with different purposes.
Girls who look the same age as themselves get problem books, young people the same age as Dojin get certificates or language test books, a woman pulling a stroller gets a cookbook, and a middle-aged man who looks older gets a book about starting a business… … .
But there were no books for midsummer. I didn’t know exactly which book to choose from among the many books.
“… … .”
I didn’t put it in my mouth.
Midsummer did not say exactly how long after that day this strange relationship would continue.
The man in front of me said that he could have as much as he wanted, but in the end, the relationship would end sooner or later.
If that happens, he will have to leave the place and wander the streets again.
Of course, in a few months, when you become an adult, you will be able to get a part-time job, but you can’t make a living with it for the rest of your life.
What should I do from now on? It’s been a long time since I dropped out of school and I don’t have any special skills or talents. It’s like I got caught up in a disaster, and now I’m getting caught up in people who don’t even know English.
Maybe even if you get lost on the street, it might be better to leave this place before it becomes more dangerous.
but.
“Okay. There’s nothing I want to see… .”
Midsummer turned his head and looked at the face of the man in front of him.
It’s still faint, but there is a certain pulpit, and the hesitation seems to have disappeared. It was unbelievably different that he was the same person who looked sick and looked like he was about to collapse a few days ago.
“Okay, can I buy you some coffee? It’s going to take a long time anyway, but it’s a bit awkward to be bruised in the meantime, and I’m going to drink.”
“Go together. It doesn’t take long.”
“Okay, I’m here now, so I’m slowly choosing.”
“I’m sorry, then, I would like a caramel macchiato, please. Pay with the card I gave you.”
“yes.”
I left the bookstore in midsummer and walked to the coffee shop. A faint light streamed from the glass ceiling of the shopping center and wet her body.
Maybe I want to see that person change.
No, I want to see you. So that day, I came back after that person. If a person who was so weak can change, maybe I can do it too.
Midsummer was the moment I was walking with such thoughts.
“Ouch!”
Something suddenly popped out of the corner and hit Midsummer’s nose.
“Sin, sorry!”
A youthful voice flowed into Midsummer’s ear, who was fiddling with his nose while blushing at the unexpected pain. Look, she was a very beautiful woman.
No, it’s not that important right now. Midsummer jumped up and opened his mouth.
“Hey, if you come out so suddenly… … .”
“Hey, I’m really in a hurry. I’m sorry. sorry… !”
The woman in front of her ran out with her pure white hair fluttering, leaving only an apology of no sincerity.
Did you not understand me? No, I don’t think I’m a foreigner if I can speak Korean. It looked like something was crying.
“Oh, what, really… … !”
Midsummer fiddled with her sore nose and looked at the woman in the direction she ran with annoyed eyes.
* * *
After washing his face, Chae Seol-ha lifted her head and looked in the mirror.
What is reflected through the eyes is brittle hair and cracked and torn lips. The slashes protruding from the corners of the mirror were tearing his face to and fro.
… … I have a newspaper interview tomorrow. No, if you come and do something like that now, what will be different?
There’s no reason left to work hard.
Because I broke everything.
but alive The water flowing from the faucet and wet her hands was saying so.
“… … .”
Tears dripping down the cheeks, dripping, dripping onto the water surface stagnant in the sink, causing ripples.
The face of the man you want to see right now is swaying through the swaying ripples. The face of a man you can no longer meet.
“Uhhh… … .”
Why did it become like this?
He did not like the fact that he had only opened his heart to himself, but gradually opened his heart to others. No matter how much makeup and exercise he tried to hide, the ugliness he was born with was disgusting.
The feeling of inferiority that hovered around the corner turned into jealousy toward others, and the fertilizer of jealousy eventually spurred a feeling of anger deep in her heart.
But it’s funny.
The people he likes aren’t the pretty girl who has a beautiful appearance, Dasomi’s unnie with a warm personality and voluptuous body that a woman can fall in love with, nor Minseo who has enough money to open her mouth.
Come on.
From a long time ago, you only liked me.
I don’t know either.
“aah!”
Chae Seol-ha threw the cup that was placed on the sink. The glass in the shower was shattered with a loud noise.
seemed to vomit As soon as he heard the confession on the subject he had been pouring out his absurd anger on, he was disgusted with himself trying to hold his hand without hesitation.
and.
[I wanted to talk face-to-face, but I have no means of contact, and I know that you are avoiding me now, so I am writing this to you.
I’ll say it outright.
I love you.
I love you not only in the past, but also now.
In fact, I wanted to hold your hand that evening as you went down the hill.
However, until the very end, he could not let go of the feeling of fear and could not move. Only now did I realize that.
I myself know well how pathetic it is to pick up a relationship that has been broken by yourself. But now I don’t want to regret it.
I want to go forward with you in the future.]
Even though it was written, she herself, who felt great joy in the words of love he whispered.
I thought so as I looked at a small letter on the bed where I was grinding. It was a crumpled, smeared letter.
Why are you doing that?
Why are you even approaching me after being treated so badly? I can’t, I can’t do that.
So write
[Letter, thank you for writing it. your heart knows
But I’ll tell you for sure.
I’ve never liked you as the opposite sex.
Not only in the past, but even now after reading your letter and thinking about it, I don’t feel that way.
All I had for you was a twisted possessiveness.
I wasn’t treating you as a person, I was treating you as a doll that took over the things I didn’t want to do and released stress. At some point, I thought you were mine.
It must be a familiar feeling to you. Yes, I was doing the same thing as the people who bullied you.
On that day, listening to your story, I realized how awful it was.
sorry.
I’m sorry, Dojin-ah.
I’m sorry that I’ve only used you until now without even thinking of accepting your heart.
but i don’t like you
No matter how much I feel guilty for you, I can’t make up my own nonsense because of it.
So I hope you understand.]
The truth is, I like you, but because of the guilt, I can’t get my heart out of it.
But if I use it like that, the current Dojin will not leave me alone. I will continue to try to melt away my guilt as I come closer than I am now.
That’s not enough.
Therefore, by dropping a single drop of lies into the lake of heart, he clenches his teeth and rejects his heart.
Leaving not a single handful of space left.
“… … .”
What’s the use of all this
Even if he writes such occasional letters, Dojini’s time wasted because of me will not come back. The scar on Dojini’s heart would not disappear.
A needle called guilt pricks her whole body without mercy.
She would rather be condemned. Whether you hear abusive words from him in anger, get slapped, kick, or strangle. He wanted to pay the price for what he had done anyway.
kill me
Rather kill me, Dojin-ah… … .
“Shhh… … .”
It was the vibrating sound from the cell phone that separated the watery silence. He reached out and picked up his cell phone.
<Garyun: older sister>
Chae Seol-ha’s heart sank. A chilling chill passed through the skin that had sprouted up, and it seemed as if each hair was on fire and engulfed my head.
The raindrops knocking on the window, the long silver thread hanging through the cracks in the door, and the slight trembling of breath.
The scenery of that day that she had put aside in the corner of her heart, the precious heart of someone she had torn apart and scattered on the ground crept out and strangled her neck.
He moved his trembling fingers to press the call button.
“hello. Yes, sweetheart, it’s my older sister… … .”
… …
“What do you mean?”
The hand holding the mug shook and stopped. The blue eyes in front of him were swinging from side to side as if urging for an answer.
He took a deep breath and continued talking.
“… … Rejected, I did.”
“Why, why did you refuse… … ? You’ve been waiting.”
Ga-ryeon Yu grabbed her temple with one hand in the dizziness that came over her.
“Because being next to you will only hurt you.”
Chae Seol-ha’s expression was stained with pain as he responded by biting his lips.
“wound.”
Yu Ga-ryun, who shook her head, muttered in a frustrated voice.
“So, from now on, Garyun, don’t worry about things like me—”
“me… … .”
Blue water drops ran down Yu Ga-ryun’s nose. The sound of teeth crackling and crackling could be heard through the palm that covered the mouth.
“It’s because of me… … .”
Embarrassed by this, Chae Seol-ha tried to reach out to Yu Ga-ryun, but Yu Ga-ryun refused her touch and jumped up and ran out of the cafe.
“Poor!”
He hurriedly moved to catch Yu Ga-ryun, who was mining, but it was nearly impossible to find her through the crowds of the shopping mall.
“… … .”
Chae Seol-ha’s lips vibrate in a fly.
Why is it always like this? This time, he was trying to solve it well, but in the end, it touched Ga-ryun’s heart and everything was messed up.
“… … ugh.”
She could only sob quietly.
regretting everything he has done.