All The Time Lost

The first thing she did upon waking up was tour the whole four tiny rooms and decide on what she was going to throw away. She needed to connect back water and electricity too but she was still not ready to meet people yet. So her morning was spent making round trips from her trailer to the dump she remembered was fifteen minutes away by foot. The new guardian didn't recognize her and she started feeling hopeful. Tarmain wasn't such a small town to begin with but it had grown tremendously to become a big attractive city the borders of which she couldn't draw anymore during the last seventeen years.

Most people wouldn't know her anymore.

She made her trips from and to the dump with a lighter heart. She even dared to ask if she could take a look around and picked up a coffee table and a few chairs.

On day two, the house was emptied out and she had woken very early to make a trip to town and buy cleaning products. Nobody recognized her yet but she couldn't be too careful either. It took two whole days to scrub all the dust, grease and mold, but she was proud of the result.

The trailer now stood out amongst the park, from the shadiest it had become the cleanest and June Realized she had to take care of it too or her children would never be allowed to step foot around. Her heart ached at the thought and she finally went to greet her last two neighbors.

« Isn't it Miss September ? » Old Joe squinted at her and stopped his rocking chair to lean forward.

« Still June, » she smiled shyly but she knew it was useless to correct him. Her mother had not wanted her, she did the least she could do out of humanity and left the rest to fate, Old Joe was the one who had named her after going over to check on the new crying addition to the park. She was named June after the month of her birth. Since then Old Joe had only called her by her name one month a year, the others she took on the name of the month they were in and acted as a living calendar for the old mechanic.

« Nah, we're in September now, » he chuckled and motioned for her to take a seat next to him. She felt herself tear up as she had flashbacks of her younger self spending many afternoon rocking beside him and listening to his fabulous stories, she still didn't know which was true and which was not.

« How are you ? » She asked after taking a moment to get her emotions under control.

« How am I ? » He turned and looked at her with such a pitiful gaze she had to avert her eyes. « I'm good, » he answered and she knew he wasnt pushing out of respect for her. « Still here and alive. »

« Still working ? »

« Here and there, » he shrugged and took a gulp from his bottle. « Enough to put food on the table. »

They spoke a bit more about the park and his health before she dared to ask if she could clean up around.

« I know where your kids live, of course, you better clean up here, » he laughed loudly.

The vast majority of her was grateful, she was relieved, though she had already known, that they had grown up nicely, that they didn't lack of anything, but a small part of her was jealous that even Old Joe saw more of her own children than she ever had.

The second neighbor, Fat Fanny, a mean lady who used to work as a stripper until breast cancer got her, barely acknowledged her presence but since she hadn't objected, June guessed it was okay to clean up around her too.

It should have taken her a whole week to clean up the park, it wasn't big but it was dirty. June didn't have that time. She hadn't seen her kids in seventeen years and she was eager to do so as soon as possible, however she realized she couldn't afford a single mistake and if they saw this place and ran… She cleaned it up in three days.

On the seventh day of her freedom, June made a small dent in her savings to buy primer, paint and other stuff she needed to make the trailer habitable. She had three outfits in total, and she was back to wearing the first one, it didn't matter that it got stained by paint anyway. She had to buy a new outfit to meet with the twins, the first meeting was the most important after all and all they heard about her was that she was a mad murderer. She had to look her best.

June was on the counter, painting the kitchen cabinets when she heard a knock, she froze in place. Had the news of her liberation finally made its way to people who knew her ? Were they here to kick her out ? What if they came to get justice themselves because they figured seventeen years wasn't enough for such scum ? She was starting to hyperventilate when another knock startled her.

She slowly got down and leaned over the counter to get her breath under control. Everything was going to be alright. She had done everything right. She was out now. They couldn't just throw her back in. They couldn't. Right ?

She slowly made her way to the door, cursing the lack of peephole and braced herself.

Nothing could have prepared her for the man standing there.

She felt a huge wave of fear rush through her and all her defenses crumbled.

He wasn't a boy anymore, he was a man, much taller and bigger than he used to be but she would have recognised him anywhere, anytime. He stared down at her with those green eyes she used to dream about night and day and she found herself fighting tears.