Became an Academy Spearman

844. [Western Front] – Nangjungjichu (120)

***

“Do you understand what I mean now?”

“… … .”

I couldn’t answer right away.

Because it was a word with so many meanings. And her mind immediately became confused.

I had not yet fully recovered from yesterday’s execution of the nine apostles, and it seemed like an even more serious reality was looming right under my nose.

‘I am… … .’

I shouldn’t only think about the apostle and try to only look at my future.

So many things were tied up, and I no longer existed simply as myself.

The countless relationships I have formed so far, the moments where I have revealed my presence, and even the execution of the nine apostles.

I had quite a bit of influence.

Gulp.

Even as I swallowed again, my throat burned.

My mind was dizzy, and Anastasia’s eyes were staring at me as if she was looking into an abyss.

‘How far does she see?’

To what extent do you see the future, so you’re calling me now to have a secret affair that no one knows about?

Sreuk.

It was that moment. Anastasia let out a small breath and nodded her head. She then withdrew her abyss-like gaze for a moment.

“It might be difficult to answer right away. “But with that alone, I think you understand the context of what I’m saying.”

“Yes, I understand the context itself. However, I don’t know how far I should go in answering.”

“Don’t think it’s difficult. “There is one thing I can say for sure.”

For a moment, I couldn’t understand what she was saying.

‘How can it all come down to one thing?’

It seems like a topic that can’t be ended by just thinking about one thing.

-Failure to report about me to the imperial family.

-The special nature of the bodies she and I have.

The two biggest secrets. And there were countless other things to think about.

“one… … “Is it?”

So, when I paused and asked, Anastasia seemed to calmly nod her head.

“There is only one. The time we spent at the sealing ceremony after encountering this apostle. That’s something only you and I need to know. What happened during the sealing ceremony and everything you did will be buried in my heart. “You should too.”

“… … ah.”

I understood it too late.

That only I and she should know. Words that should be buried in her heart.

“Never try to make an exception to this. You must not reveal this fact to the woman you are in a romantic relationship with, or anyone else. okay?”

“… … Major Anastasia. I understood what you said. “I would like to make one exception.”

“Didn’t you hear me just now?”

From her cold voice asking, I knew what she meant by talking to me.

You called me so urgently because I would be in a very difficult situation if it became known that my position, my value, and my significance were greater than what is currently known.

however.

Nevertheless, an ‘exception’ was necessary.

“Ariya Schupelent, the lord of the central magic tower. “I want to reveal everything about myself to him.”

So I opened my mouth more forcefully.

The reason she told me to keep it a secret, even from my lover. It was extremely simple.

What only we, Anastasia and I, know right now, if someone else finds out, keeping it a secret is meaningless.

That’s what secrets are all about.

No matter how trustworthy a person is, the moment someone other than the person involved finds out, it ceases to be a secret.

‘however.’

In the first place, the secrets of my body that I knew were revealed to me by Ariya.

“… … Lord of the Magic Tower.”

As she was about to refute, her eyes immediately blurred, so I carefully explained my opinion.

“yes. The magic tower lord is the one who saved me long ago, and the reason I learned the secrets of various bodies and the effects is all because of the magic tower lord. So I would like to make one exception.”

“It makes sense… … there is. But I don’t think it’s good to reveal what happened at the sealing ceremony.”

“Is it because even if you are the Magic Tower Lord, you have to be careful?”

Sreuk.

As I slowly made eye contact with her, I also did not avoid my gaze.

Between the intersecting gazes, her eyes, like a deep abyss, contained me. But I still can’t figure out the feelings in her eyes.

however. At least I knew I could trust Anastasia.

Even if the whole world is stained with despair and filled with darkness that cannot be seen an inch in the future, Anastasia is the hope of humanity.

‘So, we have to bump into each other more.’

Ariya, who I absolutely need right now, must become someone she can trust as well.

“I understand. The exception is the magic tower lord… … I admit it. But no more than that.”

I was relieved to see her reluctantly accepting it.

‘Actually, I guess I have no choice but to accept it.’

No matter how central she was, being the head of the central magic tower held a supreme position.

“I will be very careful too.”

“I think you all know that confidentiality is important regarding what happened between you and me at the sealing ceremony. And I have more to say.”

“Yes, please speak comfortably.”

Watching her avoid a topic that becomes extremely complicated if you delve deeper into it, I first calmed down.

‘I may have exposed myself too much.’

It is definitely necessary to prove my worth, but even so, I have gone too far.

Because no matter who sees it, it is ‘abnormal’.

The fact that I, and not Anastasia, the main force of the Western Front, broke the high-level sealing ceremony performed by the nine apostles. If that were to become known, it would cause an uproar.

While I was thinking, I was waiting for her to say something.

“Han Tiansheng. “You should reconsider the value of your body from now on.”

For a moment, I blinked my eyes blankly.

“… … yes?”

“The special utility of you and my body that was revealed to me. Now I know what it is, but if you think about it just a little, you will realize how ridiculous its value is. “Honestly, I’m so anxious about that.”

“I also have no intention of using my body carelessly… … .”

“Can you promise?”

The cold look of her interrupting me for a moment pricked my heart.

Her blue eyes seemed to see right through me.

As if he knew what I did… … .

“… … .”

So I couldn’t answer for a moment.

I knew in my heart that I should answer right away and say I would promise, but I couldn’t promise because her eyes seemed to be penetrating everything about me.

“But you’re not trying to lie.”

“… … sorry.’

I ended up apologizing without realizing it.

I don’t know.

I also wondered why I was apologizing now, but I felt like I was fascinated by her eyes.

“I was very busy after returning yesterday, but I confirmed one fact. Ever since Lieutenant Sabrina’s accident left her unconscious, you’ve been to her infirmary almost every day. “Right?”

My breath stopped for a moment.

“… … yes.”

Even as I answered, my heart was pounding like crazy.

But it was absurd.

Well, it was only one day.

Yesterday, the nine apostles who were all responsible were executed, and the front line’s alert posture was lifted. It was a time when normalcy had not yet returned from the disaster that resulted in numerous casualties.

however.

Anastasia was now fully aware of my past actions.

And he was now interrogating me through my actions.

‘What did I do… … .’

She had already made an ‘inference’.

And that too with almost certainty.

“Now I know what you would have done in the infirmary. And since I was with you for a long time at the sealing ceremony yesterday, I can guess even more, and it’s almost certain.”

“Hey, Major Anastasia. I am… … .”

“I’m not saying this to blame you. “Don’t be so nervous.”

Despite her voice interrupting me again, I couldn’t do anything.

I felt like I was naked.

Responsibility for my actions.

And just by revealing the truth, I felt so scared of her mind’s ability to see through everything.

“You probably did it to help. Yes, not for you, but for Ensign Sabrina… … But let me check one thing. “Does Lieutenant Sabrina know what you did?”

“… … “I know.”

Even as I answered, there was no strength in my voice.

My hair turned white, and I felt a huge amount of pressure.

Thinking is different.

And even the areas of understanding are different.

In addition, the fact that her perspective on the world was so different, and that she was able to pay close attention to even the smallest details during this hectic time for everyone, made me think that Anastasia looked completely different now.

‘It’s not just about being strong.’

She was flawless. A person who has no weaknesses in existence. Truly a superhuman… … .

It was difficult for me to even follow her understanding right now.

“I honestly think this alone is a very bad thing. How strange it is for you and I to escape from the seal of the nine apostles and have newly reconstructed bodies. And how much controversy that strangeness will cause.”

“Hey, Major Anastasia. Ensign Sabrina is fine.”

“How can you say that? “Can you say for sure?”

“yes… I can assure you. “That’s because Ensign Sabrina and I are lovers.”

I was the first to reveal to Anastasia the fact that I had not revealed to my fellow enemy platoon members.

However, there was nothing that could be done.

“Is that because Sabrina knew of your behavior and accepted it, so you formed that relationship?”

“I am… … I can’t tell you in detail about everything I did. Ensign Sabrina was semi-conscious, but he was not awake. And I was able to wake up based on my own strength, and I originally had a heart.”

“I see, maybe it could be like that for you.”

Sreuk.

As Anastasia, with a strange smile, gently rested her chin, my heart felt even more oppressed.

‘I don’t know anymore… … .’

What kind of man will I be seen by Anastasia now?

Now I can’t even figure out what’s going on.

Perhaps Anastasia would understand my actions more than Sabrina. There is a specific reason why I had to do that, and the circumstances can be understood.

However, the reality was different.

Right now, her younger sister, Glesia, and I were lovers, and I didn’t think it would look very good for me to act like this.

“I think the conversation will take a bit longer. “You should also try to relax a little.”

“… … yes.”

When she suddenly lifted the teacup, I just let out a deep breath.

however.

You can’t run away from her.

We cannot avoid this reality or not face it.

That was my reality now.

“… … .”

No matter how Anastasia sees me. I have to reveal everything to her and build a good relationship with her.

Gulp.

As I quenched my thirst with the already cold tea, cold sweat leaked from my hands.