Jörmungandr

As much as I would love to say that Madara put up a good fight… 

He didn't. 

He was old, his body frail and weak. The legendary Uchiha fought with all he had, throwing jutsu after jutsu, Taijutsu long since forgotten, and even a myriad of genjutsu.

Even though he was losing, and he knew he was losing, Madara had a large smile on his face. I fought him only using Taijutsu. Any real jutsu from me would have ended it early, well… earlier. 

Madara lay beaten on the ground of the cave, his breathing shallow and quick. His blood oozed from multiple cuts on his body. I couldn't help but pity the man.

"Finish it my descendant." His voice low. 

"Oh? What makes you think I'm your descendant?" 

The man chuckled before breaking into a coughing fit, specks of blood stained his lips. 

"Only an Uchiha can defeat an Uchiha, and you look just like I-Izuna." 

'Izuna huh?' "Sure lets go with that… but what if I gave you a chance?" 

"Another chance?" Madara slowly sat up as I healed his wounds. 

"A chance to actually do some good, to make a difference." 

"And who are you to make such an offer?" His voice grew stronger. 

"Why, I'm God of course." 

"…" Madara looked at me with an unreadable expression. 

"Anywho, that's besides the point. You don't really have a choice, I'm curious to see what you'll do when given a world to do what you wish."

"Ha, and what's the catch?" 

"Nothing, you can do what you will. Kill everyone, try to become a god, even steal all the wives." 

Madara raised an eyebrow.

"Only," I continued, "you won't be in this world. I'm sending you to another. One where you will be unopposed." 

"I- I don't want that." 

"Hmm?" 

"All my life I have fought and fought, searching for a worthy opponent. Hashirama came close but his heart was too soft, he held back." 

I listened as he continued to talk about how he wanted a good fight, and how he didn't even really care for world domination. He just wanted to be able to enjoy fighting someone who didn't pull any of their punches. 

He was so taken in by telling me his life story that he didn't even notice that I had regressed his age to his prime. When he finished recounting his wants and dreams, I simply looked at him with a smile. 

"Fine, you want a world where you can fight all you want? Very well… I'm going to send you to a world of giants." 

"Wha-

He didn't get to finish, I Spartan kicked him through a portal I opened up behind him. I had a feeling he'd enjoy the world I isekaied him to. 

'Hmm, did I really just do that? Does this make me ROB?' 

I shrugged to myself before looking around the now empty cave. The Gedo statue was still here, I wondered if Nagato and the other Ame orphans were even born yet. 

'I remembered them being kids around during the third ninja war… or was it the second?' 

With Minato still being a little midget, Jiraya must have not taught him yet. Another issue crept into my mind, 

'Zetsu wasn't here huh? Whatever, I have a feeling that it'll be fine.' 

——————————————————————————

Hundreds of miles away, a strange Venus flytrap creature was being glared at by one Infinite Dragon Loli. Cold sweat broke onto the secret offspring of Kaguya as Ophis stared at him menacingly. 

"Stupid plant man… you ruined my cinnamon rolls." Ophis said in her monotone voice.

Zetsu gulped, he couldn't phase away like he normally did, black snakes held him down hissing at him while the strange girl slowly walked towards him with shadowed features. 

"You'll pay for that." 

Zetsu screamed. 

——————————————————————————

"KYAAAAAAAA! YAMETEEEEEE!" 

"Huh? What the fuck was that?" I looked around. 

I had been looting Madara's hideout when I heard what sounded like the typical anime cutesie scream followed by a word that a lot of you will recognise because you're all degenera- I mean… men of culture. 

[Scene Break] (Time Skip) 

One year in the Narutoverse, Six hours in Homeworld

I had been in the village for one year now, though only six hours had passed in my DxD/HP homeworld. 

I checked a few days ago. 

Michael had been shocked that I had come back 'so soon'. Though I told him that it had been a year for me already. 

'I guess my powers over time are more potent than I thought… or I'm just ass at math. Every day that passes here only a second passes in my home world.' 

I did the calculations in my head and realised that yeah… I'm terrible at math. Still, it was a pleasant surprise since things were starting to get interesting here and I didn't want to leave just yet. One of the reasons came running at me moments later. 

"Sensei!!!" 

I looked at the redheaded missile that blurred towards me. Kushina was smiling widely as she stopped in front of me. Even though she had stopped I could tell she was practically vibrating with energy. 

"Soooo, are we finally going to take our first real mission?" 

I sighed, "If I say yes will you stop trying to prank me?" 

She smiled mischievously, "Hehe, sensei… are you lying again?" 

"No Kushina, I'm not lying. Hiruzen has called us to his office." 

"Eh? What does the old man want now?" 

I faulted at that, "Kushina, we've been going to him for missions ever since I took you as an apprentice." 

The red haired teen giggled, "Oh right, I forgot teehee." 

'I can see where Naruto got the airheaded-ness from…' I thought. 

Kushina stared at me, "Sensei… you're thinking of something bad about me huh?" 

"Er what? No…" 

"Liar!" She pointed at me, "I know that look on your face." 

"Right, let's just get going." I tried to change the subject. 

"Ha?! Don't change the subject sensei." 

"Come on, let's go. Don't make me ban you from having any ramen." 

Kushina immediately deflated, "I-b-but sensei… I, UGH! Fine, let's go see the old man then." 

I chuckled and watched my single apprentice stomp off towards the Hokage tower. It had been a shock when Hiruzen suggested I take her as an apprentice a few weeks after my 'probationary' period had ended. 

Turns out, Kushina didn't have Kurama yet, Mito was also still alive and had suggested that I train Kushina. Lots of other clans came to me to train their heirs or guards. I rejected them all, using the excuse that as clan head of the Uchiha that I couldn't give away clan secrets. 

Of course when it came out that I had taken Kushina in as my one and only apprentice, the village had been outraged. Not at me, but at Kushina. 

Apparently she had somehow seduced me into teaching her the village secrets. 

I nearly crushed the entire village in annoyance then and there. I had a limit on how much stupid I could take in a day and it had passed that threshold on that day. 

Mito and Hiruzen spoke to the villagers after I had shown a few people that attacked Kushina to a technique I liked to call 'cunt punt', a move where I introduced my foot to their balls or cooche… I don't discriminate. As the saying goes; 

'These hands are rated E for everyone.' 

We reached the Hokage's office and the assistant told us to wait as the Hokage was meeting with some sort of important VIP.

I had a feeling this wasn't a mission, usually Hiruzencwould give me a heads up before any mission. Kushina was the future container for the Kyubi after all. It only made sense that Sarutobi was extra cautious when it came to her. 

He and Mito had set me up as Kushina's teacher but I knew they did it mainly cause I was currently the village nuclear deterrent. To them I was Madara reborn, and when I took the Clan Headship from Fujitaka it only solidified that idea. 

Speaking of Madara I wondered how he was doing, I had sent him to another world after restoring his power and his youth. Hiruzen was still busy so I closed my eyes and sent out a mental probe to the tiny bit of my power I had attached to him so that I could find him in moments like this. 

A picture began to form in my mindscape, like a theater screen images started moving, displaying what the Ghost of the Uchiha was up to. 

——————————————————————————

That God wearing his face had sent him here nearly half a decade ago. He didn't want to admit it but what else could that man, no, that being have been. 

He had woken up next to a small pond, convieniently so, he checked his reflection in the waters surface and frowned. 

His youth had been restored back to when he and Hashirama had founded Konohagakure no Sato. He could feel his dense chakra flowing in his body better than it had ever been before. 

At first he thought he had been sent to another of the hidden villages. The language was entirely different than the one he was used to from the Elemental Nations. 

He wandered for the first two years, looking for a purpose, looking for the promised fight. He began to wonder if that God was lying. Then he heard the whispers of giants beyond the city walls. 

He had been in the home he had been living in for a year since his arrival when it happened. There was a clap of thunder then a giant appeared. Madara's blood boiled in anticipation of the fight. Almost immediately his Sharingan flared to life. 

People around his screamed and ran as the gaint that appeared destroyed the wall that had protected them for generations. Not Madara though, Madara had a wide grin etched in his face. 

The giant that had appeared had been shocked when an ethereal warrior bisected him from hip to hip. The shockwave from the slash traveled further behind him destroying distant mountains. 

The giant spotted a lone man standing in mid air inside the blue warrior. Arms crossed and blazing red eyes filled with indifference. The giant roared and tried to drag itself away. 

There was another clap of thunder and another giant appeared, this one was significantly smaller than the previous giant. There was also plates of what looked like armor on the giants body. 

Madara sneered, "So you want to dance too?" 

His eyes spun, his Sharingan evolving into the Rinnegan. The world stood still as a looming shadow blot out the sun. The armored giant roared as it looked up to the sky, towards the meteor bearing down on him. 

Madara watched dispassionately as the giant caught the meteor with some escort. Rasing his hand again he called out to the roaring giant. 

"Impressive… now what about the second one?" 

The giant was crushed to paste, Madara was disappointed. For all their supposed power and fearsom appearance, they were pathetically weak.

"Hn." 

Madara grunted in annoyance and dispelled his Susanoo, he landed gracefully and made his way over to the crushed giants.

"Your weakness disgusts me." Madara spat on the giants corpse. 

Its was then that a figure burst from the giants nape drawing his attention. Madara hummed,

"Maybe not all hope is lost for this world."

——————————————————————————

I opened my eyes again after chuckling at Madara steamrolling the Titan shifters. I made a note to visit him later, time seemed to flow differently in that world naturally. 

"Uchiha-sama, Hokage-sama is ready for you." Hiruzen's assistant said, pulling me from my internal thoughts. 

Nodding to the woman I nudged Kushina who had fallen asleep with some drool leaking out of the corner of her mouth. She jumped up with a start and took a combat stance. 

"Izzit the end of the world?" She sleepily mumbled. 

'Cute…' 

"Come on shrimpy, the Hokage called us in." 

She immediately became lucid and glared at me. If this was an anime she would have gotten a tick mark on her head. 

"Don't call me that you shitty teacher!" She exclaimed while pointing at me. 

I raised an eyebrow at her and crossed my arms. "No ramen for a month." 

"I-what…" Kushina wilted, her eyes doing the wavy thing that anime characters do before they begin to bawl.

'How the fuck is that even physically possible?????' 

"WAHHHHH! Sensei, please no! I wa- no, I need ramen to live!" Tears exploded out the side of her eyes in a comical fashion. 

'I'm so fucking confused, that shouldn't be possible right?'

"Hmm? Then be on your best behaviour when we speak to the Hokage." 

Kushina sniffles and furiously wiped her face with her sleeve. "H-hai, Sensei! I'll make sure to behave around the old man 'ttebane!" 

A chuckle came from the Hokage's door where Hiruzen was looking at Kushina with his pipe in his mouth and a smile on his face. 

"I don't think I'm that old." He spoke up, shocking the Uzumaki. 

Kushina jumped, "AHH," spinning around she pointed at Hiruzen, "don't do that old man!" 

Hiruzen just chuckled some more before meeting my eyes and becoming serious. He said three simple words;

"It is time." 

I nodded, Kushina looked between the Hokage and I, confusion clear on her face. 

"Time for what?" 

"Kushina, we're going to go meet Mito-san." 

"Mito-baachan?" 

"Yeah, there's something important she needs to tell you." 

"Hmm? Okay… let's go sensei!" Kushina ran off. 

I sighed and followed after her, Hiruzen just puffed at his pipe while walking with me. Whatever he was smoking was definitely not tobacco. It was a scent I was all too familiar with.

'No wonder he's so fucking mellow all the time… bastard somehow has access to the devils lettuce.' 

[Scene Break]

I sat outside the Uzumaki compound as Mito and Hiruzen spoke with Kushina. Mito was getting old, even for an Uzumaki. She wanted to pass on in her own terms, Kushina was to take her place as the jinchūriki of the kyubi. Either today or within the next few days. 

On the topic of Uzumaki's, Uzushiogakure hadn't fallen yet, I was sure that the day was coming soon. I had shadow clones patrolling the village borders and they had reported that Kiri, Iwa, and Kumo, were already probing the area. 

The last report was around a week and a half ago. Around that time I had been busy training Kushina in kenjutsu. She was surprisingly adept at wielding an arming sword. I had planned on giving her a katana but decided otherwise since I wanted my only student to be unique. 

Nothing against katanas but an English arming sword was so much more effective in terms of swords. Two edges, flexible, and a wicked point that could easily pierce through steel plate. 

While katanas had superior cutting power, arming swords were just better all around. Kushina was deadly with the sword I had 'forged' for her. I had made the sword with my powers using a chunk of Uru folded around a vibranium core. 

It was probably the strongest sword in this world. I had also bound it to her bloodline, so no one but her could pick it up or wield it. 

The trio had been talking for a while, I was getting impatient. I was about to go look for something to do when I got the memories of a clone that dispelled itself. Grinning from ear to ear. 

I materialised the iconic red samurai armor around my clothes. I had adopted the typical Madara  look, high collared shirt, black gloves, dark pants, bandages on the shins, and black ninja sandals. 

Madara's Gunbai appeared in my hand and I attached it to the back of my armour. Creating a clone, I sent it to go tell Hiruzen what I was about to do and to tell him not to worry about it. 

Without further delay, I flashed over to the border of Uzu where a massive gathering of Shinobi were running towards the hidden village. 

The front line slowed down when they saw me, the three kages from each village glared at me and I smirked in response. Crimson EMS spinning slowly I crossed my arms and addressed the invading army. 

"You have no business in these lands. Leave, now, and I may let you keep your lives." 

"Ha! It's just one man, everyone ATTACK!!" The Tsuchikage shouted. 

My smile turned bloodthirsty as I unhooked my Gubai. 

"I was hoping you'd say that." 

[Scene Break]

Uzumaki Ashina had gotten word that Kiri had finally launched their attack along with Kumo and Iwa, the latter two villages saw an opportunity to poach members of his clan and seized it. 

Fortunately he had already anticipated the attack and prepared for it. Unfortunately they were still badly outnumbered. Three villages with at least 2000 Shinobi each. More than a fourth of those Shinobi being Jonin. 

Ashina had sent word to Konoha for help, he prayed that Uzushiogakure could hold out until then. Despite his optimism Ashina had accepted that Uzu would be all but destroyed. 

No one wanted to flee, everyone wanted to fight. To fight for their village, their lives, and the lives of their families. Ashina wished that for once they wouldn't be so hard headed. He wanted the Uzumaki clan to survive, not be wiped out with the village. 

Alas, Uzumaki were known for their stubbornness not just their ridiculous chakra supplies. 

Ashina as well as a contingency of 1500 of the villages best Shinobi and fuinjutsu masters ran towards the village border. He had no doubt that the three allied villages would find a way around the whirlpools protecting the entrance to Uzushio.

Everyone that join him on this suicide mission to cripple the enemy came to a halt, the reason? 

A titanic ethereal warrior made out of pure chakra was decimating the armies of Kiri and Iwa. The Shinobi that Kumo had brought had already been routed. A large ball of earth hovering hundreds of feet in the air. 

Ashina could easily spot the mangled bodies of the Kumo-nin that were sticking out of the miniature moon. 

"Ashina-sama, that's…" Someone next to him started

"Uchiha Madara." Ashina finished. 

"But how? He was reported dead a long time ago?" 

"Perhaps this is a clone?"

"No you idiot, not even shadow clones last that long." 

"What if it's his son?" 

"Oh! What if it's his twin brother!"

"He didn't have any brother idiot!" 

"No you!" 

"What did you say?!" 

"I called you an idiot." 

"Yeah? Well I fucked you mo-

"Don't you bring my mother into this!" 

"ENOUGH!" Ashina shouted, the Uzumaki around him immediately became quite. 

Ashina huffed and shook his head, sometimes his clan was really just too much.

[Scene Break]

"Run! He's a demon!" A Kiri ninja screamed. 

"Too late!" I sneered before making my Susanoo stomp on him. 

"Ahhhh! Run! Retreat!" 

"There's no escape you dicks!" I laughed maniacally. 

My Susano mirrored the horse hand seal that I did. 

"Katon: Goka Mekkyaku." 

I didn't need to say the name but it was fun watching the ninja scatter as a tidal wave of fire shot out of my Susanoo's mouth. 

Some of them tried to use water jutsu to defend themselves. A few even used a water prison jutsu to try and survive. 

They were all either burned to ash, flash fried or boiled alive in their own jutsus. Seeing this, the Kage, who had been hiding at the rear of their armies called for a retreat. I launched a few more jutsus while inside my Susanoo. 

I had to make sure that the survivors of my massacre were good and traumatised. Dispelling my Susanoo I created a few clones to chase the retreating army out. Then I turned around to face my audience that I had just noticed. 

I was a bit bummed out that they didn't get to see me do the 'what are you going to do about the second one' move before using chibaku tensei to make a moon out of the debris from the meteors. 

Once I was sure that there were no sneaky breeki ninja left waiting to ambush me or the Uzumaki host, I teleported straight to the defending army. 

"Yo." I greeted the Uzumaki army as a whole.

The oldest Uzumaki I had ever seen, walked forward to speak with me. 

'Well I've only ever seen like three Uzumaki clan members in my life so…' 

"What is your name?" 

'Huh, that's a first… usually they don't even ask for my name.'

"Uchiha Akimitsu." I responded in the traditional manner. 

"Hmm, so you're not him." 

"If you're referring to Madara, no, I'm not. He was my relative though." 

"As I thought, you look very much like him." 

"I take it that asking for my name isn't why you're here." 

"No, we were ready to lay down our lives to defend Uzu when we saw you… fighting the invaders. Did Konoha send you?" 

"Sure let's go with that." 

I wasn't going to tell them that I had infiltrated their village or that I was sneaking around their borders. 

"Either way, my clan owes you a debt Uchiha-san." 

"You know my name but I never got yours, and don't worry about it. I'm currently apprenticing one of your clan members, I could just let her clan and family die." 

"Regardless, we thank you. As for my name, it is Uzumaki Ashina. May I ask who your apprentice is?" 

There was no way he didn't know, there were only two Uzumaki clan members in Konoha at the moment not including Tsunade. 

"Uzumaki Kushina." 

Ashina chuckled so did a few others, "I see, and how is my granddaughter doing?" 

'Eh? Granddaughter? What the shit?' 

"Er… she's stubborn and way too energetic, but she's got heart, and she's actually much smarter than people give her credit for." 

"Hmm, as you are her master I'll take your word for it. That girl… I swear, she is mischief incarnate." 

"Hahaha," I laughed, "she constantly tries to prank me because I've only ever let her take D rank missions ever since I've taken her under my wing." 

"Oh?" Ashina raised an eyebrow, "is she not ready for anything higher?" 

"She is, it was a request from Mito-san." 

"I see…" Ashina hummed before motioning for the other Uzumaki to start heading back. "Has it happened yet?" 

Clearly the Uzumaki, or at least Ashina, were aware that Kushina was slotted to become Kurama's next Jinchūriki.

"Mito-san brought her in to speak today. If it hasn't happened yet then it'll happen with in the next few days." 

"I may have to visit then, to see my granddaughter and to make sure the sealing goes without issue." 

"Kushina would love that." 

Ashina smiled, "Sounds like you truly care for her." 

"She's grown on me." I admitted. 

"Hmm, then how about taking her as your wife?" 

"What?"