MCU: No Limits

Dr. Joyce Phillips was completely confident that Sandy wouldn't recommend her to be someone's psychiatrist without a good reason; her friend is too prudent for that.

This time, while reading some files on her computer, the psychiatrist realized that this was not a common case.

About to speak for the first time with her new patients, a 21-year-old woman and a 5-year-old boy, siblings and Japanese-Americans, in separate sessions, Dr. Phillips would not deny that this was a delicate situation and that it would require a lot of seriousness and attention.

Currently, her patient is Keiko Wakui.

The older sister had dark circles under her eyes and wandered off in the first few minutes before really focusing on answering her questions.

"What is your relationship with your brother like? Please don't answer if it's an invasive question."

Keiko looked at her new doctor, was briefly surprised when she heard the question, and shook her head.

A question like that wasn't a big deal. That's what Keiko thought, before the roots of uncertainty blossomed in her mind.

"No, it's not invasive, I think. Honestly, Dr. Phillips, sometimes I think I don't know him... No, I really don't know my younger brother as well as I thought."

"Could you elaborate on that?"

"Well, I've been working four jobs for years... Uh, at first it was just three jobs, but recently I got a job as a taxi driver after I got a car for a very low price. I also work as a waitress in a restaurant and deliver pizzas at another restaurant on the same street. In the evening shift, I work in a bar as a bartender. Almost near the end of the day, I take the subway to my neighborhood and walk home, so I fall asleep almost immediately when I lie down in bed. This has been my routine for years, from morning to night, from Sunday to Sunday. This has been happening since..."

Dr. Phillips waved her hand, asking her to continue. Keiko took a deep breath, moving her fingers over her bandaged wrist before speaking.

"My parents died at the hands of a robber who wanted the jewelry my mother was wearing around her neck, five years ago. Both were shot, all the shots hit their heads. When I received the news and ran there, I saw some people covering their bodies with some kind of bag, I think they were doctors... The holes in their perpetually terrified faces are something I still see in nightmares."

"That's... traumatizing, I would say. Does your brother have any memory of it?"

"Well, Keiji wasn't even two months old when we lost our parents."

"Do you have any living relatives besides your brother?"

"No. We don't have any living grandparents, and both my mother and my father were only children. They didn't even have a distant cousin."

"What made you decide that you would take care of your brother?"

"I thought we would go to one of those government institutions, since there are no more orphanages... I think it was around that time that I decided I would take care of Keiji.I emancipated myself a few months later."

"Did that end up negatively impacting your education?"

"I didn't finish high school. Now, I think it's too late to pursue education. I don't have time for that."

OK, this is all getting very... wow, that's what the psychiatrist thought, watching Keiko scratch her shoulders.

Even though she was clearly nervous, Keiko continued.

"Keiji was born with fragile health. When my parents came from the hospital with him, a few days after he was born, I finally saw him. And he looked so... so small. It was different from what I expected. Honestly, I don't even remember what I was really expecting my brother to be."

"I remember hearing my father talking to my mother, restless, saying that his weight was much lower than that of other premature babies and... and apparently, the doctors thought and openly told us that he wouldn't live long. But he... He wanted to live. He always wanted to live."

Keiko wiped her tears with the sleeve of her coat, her eyes as red as the area around her nose.

Quickly, Dr. Phillips took a tissue from a box and handed it to Keiko, who accepted it and murmured a small "thank you" before covering her nose with the tissue and sneezing.

"That was a strong account. You are a strong person, and you should know that. Some of my patients have decided not to share what troubles them and have kept it to themselves." Said Dr. Joyce, handing another tissue to Keiko and throwing the dirty tissue into the trash bin under her desk. "Inevitably, this destroys them inside later."

After Keiko wiped her nose, the blonde psychiatrist placed her hands on the table, intertwining her fingers. Staring at the younger and more nervous woman who was on the opposite side of her desk, Dr. Joyce Phillips had already decided to ask her second question.

"Now, what would you answer if I asked what your brother desires most?"

"My brother wishes for a childhood." His patient responded, promptly and without evident hesitation.

"He never wished to be in a hospital bed taking injections and pills and clearly doesn't like being stuck at home. Keiji... Keiji knows that I noticed this, but it took me a long time to realize."

Twiddling her thumbs, Keiko proceeded with her answer:

"I got so used to this routine that I deprived him of something much more important than the ice cream he eats."

During her statement, Keiko shook her head and let out a short, awkward laugh.

"Ha... It's quite ironic, you know? I thought I was protecting him, but what my eyes saw wasn't real. Keiji wasn't really happy."

Keiko lowered her head, and Phillips caught the guilt in her eyes.

"I just took him away from the childhood he should be experiencing now. I... I just took away the childhood he wanted. I just gave him more traumas."

"Hours before I did... Well, what I did... He was sick again, but for the first time, Keiji insisted he didn't want to go to the hospital, no matter how many times I said I would take him. I was thinking of taking him to the hospital by force until I looked into his eyes more closely. I saw many things, but it was mainly stubbornness, it was persistence. Reluctantly, I ended up agreeing to let him stay at home." She said, with wide eyes and a hoarse voice.

Keiko took the glass of water that the psychiatrist handed her and drank slowly before looking at Joyce, who stared at her in silence. Realizing it was a silent request for her to continue, Keiko placed the glass on the table as carefully as she could with her trembling hands just before responding. 

"So, when I entered his room the next morning, I was confused when he didn't greet me. He always does that, every morning. He usually wakes up early, often before me, just to wish me a good day at work, even if it was just an empty greeting. "

"But he wasn't breathing. I'm serious, I really thought he was dead. And he was, I saw it."

"What did you feel at that moment?"

"I felt guilt, I felt shame. Frustration, anger, helplessness, and self-hatred."

"Then I went to the bathroom, opened the door, and went in. I seemed to be in a trance. My body seemed to move as if my emotions were guiding me."

"I pulled back the curtain, got into the bathtub, and did what I did. I was dying, I felt death for a moment, as absurd as it may seem." She said, her voice overflowing with emotion. "Then I felt a shock and woke up. Briefly, I saw Keiji running before he came back with my phone and called emergency services. He was confused, devastated, scared..."

"Then, he came closer and hugged me."

"He was crying... That was the first genuine hug I received from him."