My Favorite Has Started A Live Broadcast!

Chapter 20 - Suppressing Feelings



It had been about three weeks since my body had changed. So… it had been just over a week since I was team-killed by Aroalo.

KakaoTalk- KakaoTalk- KakaoTalk-

“Ugh…”

From early on a peaceful weekend morning, I woke up to the annoying sound of messages coming through. I lazily opened my eyes, not wanting to leave the warmth of my blanket, and reached for the phone lying nearby.

– We’re from Seoul.

Sooyoung: Read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it read it.

Sooyoung: @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon @Su-yeon.

Minho: ? I read it.

Su-yeon: What is this?

“Wow…”

Looking at the dozens of KakaoTalk messages that only fully appeared after I hit “view all,” I felt the craziness of my friends more intensely than usual and was fully awake now.

Sooyoung: If you’re okay, wanna go for drinks????

“Hmm… drinks…”

Come to think of it, I hadn’t had any alcohol since I got this body. Before, I could handle about one bottle of soju, and that was the point where I started to blackout.

Su-yeon: Wait, let me think.

Sooyoung: Okay.

I still didn’t know the alcohol tolerance of this body. Maybe I’d get drunk after just one or two drinks, or perhaps, just like this body was ideal for gaming, it might handle alcohol well too.

Being able to drink a lot isn’t necessarily a good thing, but it seemed better than not being able to drink at all.

Su-yeon: When?

Sooyoung: Dunno. How about tomorrow evening?

Su-yeon: I’m good… but why hasn’t Minho read anything?

In the chatroom with just three people, the “1” next to each message didn’t seem to be disappearing.

Sooyoung: That guy is gaming again. Forever a gold-tier loser.

Su-yeon: Should I call him?

Sooyoung: Nah, he’ll check after his game.

Su-yeon: I have work this morning and tomorrow too, so I might be a bit late.

Sooyoung: Okay, I’ll decide the time and place and let you know.

“Hmm…”

I laid out the excuse that I might be late just in case, and checked the time.

9:11 AM.

There was still a bit of time before I had to head to the hospital. Pushing my body back into the bed, I began to reflect on the past week.

First and foremost, Chocoa hadn’t shown up on my stream. Even during games when I occasionally checked the chat or spoke briefly, there was no sign of the username “Chocoa” anywhere. I even asked my viewers and checked the list of viewers, but “Chocoa” hadn’t visited my stream at all.

“Hmm…”

Next was Aroalo. Ever since that incident where he shot through my head, he hadn’t suggested duoing again, and his chat messages had significantly decreased. The way he immediately apologized and started explaining as soon as I mentioned his name… he was truly a pitiful person.

Otherwise, everything had been peaceful. I cleaned my younger sister’s house, ate together, and even got a few confessions from strangers at the café, but it wasn’t as shocking as wearing a skirt. After wearing a skirt for the first time, I started wearing them at the café regularly. I didn’t want to waste money on buying pants, and ever since I realized that the pants I wore weren’t mine, I felt a slight aversion and gradually adjusted to skirts.

“Hello~?”

– Hey, unnie, you know you’re coming today, right?

“Of course… it’s been a while, so I should visit.”

Today, I was supposed to visit my parents’ house. I hated taking the long-distance bus for hours, but it was my youngest sister’s birthday, so how could I not go? As I wriggled in the blanket, I kept talking on the phone with my sister.

– Do you know what time your bus is?

“There’s one around 3 PM, so I’ll go to the hospital first, have lunch, and then head out… Sigh… four hours…”

– Can’t be helped… Will you be okay with motion sickness?

“Hmm… I’m not sure yet. I’ll bring some medicine just in case.”

– Okay… Let’s meet around 10:10 then.

“Got it~”

Shhhhhhhhhh-

“Hmm~”

Maybe I was maturing mentally or just getting used to this, but I could finally open my eyes in the shower. When I undressed and entered the tiny bathroom with its tiny showerhead, I could clearly see in the mirror a body that could easily mesmerize anyone. But I was learning to consciously avoid focusing on it, reminding myself, this is my body, and repeating that mantra in my head allowed me to at least wash with my eyes open. Thanks to the large masses on my chest, I couldn’t even see below my shoulders.

Was this… lucky?
My hair, which had grown back fast enough to make any balding person envious, had grown long again, now reaching past my shoulders. As I dried it, I checked the time.

9:40 AM.

Unlike in the past, when it took over an hour to shower and dry my hair, I managed to finish in just 30 minutes this time, and I praised myself for the improvement.

“……”

Long hair was probably better. Why? Because now, after finishing my preparations, I found myself playing with it before leaving the house. Freshly washed and dried, my hair was incredibly soft. It felt like stroking a fluffy cat.

Five minutes passed as I absentmindedly played with my hair.

“…Oh crap…”

I hurriedly left the house, realizing how much time had passed.

“Huff… Huff… Sorry…”

“You okay? It’s still nine minutes early.”

“Huff… Really…? Thank goodness… Huff…”

“Are you really okay? Want to take a break?”

“Whew… No, I’m fine now. Let’s go!”

Whether it was because of my busy café job or dealing with nasty viewers, I seemed to have gained some stamina. I managed to make it to the meeting spot on time by sprinting for about five minutes (with a short break in between).

I took off the cardigan I was wearing over my white T-shirt and headed towards the hospital with light steps.

“Hello~”

“Long time no see.”

Inside the hospital, I met with the doctor after a long time.

“…Has something good happened recently?”

“Hmm…”

Honestly, there have been some good things recently. For one, the brown envelope I received yesterday… and Chocoa’s growing interest in me during my streams.

“Hmm… What’s Chocoa?”

“…Huh? Did I say that out loud?”

“Uh… yes.”

“……”

“Could you tell me more about it?”

I lowered my head, then changed my mind. What was wrong with having a hobby? I began explaining about Chocoa confidently.

“Hmm…”

After a lengthy explanation that took about ten minutes, I looked at the doctor. The doctor’s expression had grown complex, and his fingers were rapidly typing away on the keyboard. Unlike my slow, hunt-and-peck typing, the doctor’s fingers were incredibly fast.

“Um… Doctor…?”

“Just a moment…”

Seeing the doctor’s complicated expression made me feel a small sense of unease, and I glanced at my sister.

“……”

For some reason, my sister was looking at me with a slightly tired expression.

“Hmm…”

The doctor’s fingers finally stopped, and they looked up at me. I swallowed nervously, waiting for them to speak.

“I’ve contacted Joo-won just now.”

“Ah… the counselor?”

“Yes… I sent a bit of what you just told me.”

“…What did you say…?”

“…It’s love.”

“…Pardon?”

My sister and I asked almost simultaneously.

“Um… love.”

“…Love?”

“Yes.”

It was something I had never considered.

“I… I just want that person to always be there… I want to hear their voice… I want them to be happy… It’s just…”

“…If you’re going to deny it, I won’t stop you. Joo-won would probably say the same.”

“……”

“For now, that’s it. Unless you have more to discuss, there’s no need to visit the counseling center.”

“…Okay…”

“……”

Half-spaced out, I walked out of the hospital.

“Um… Unnie…”

“…Yeah?”

“I just want you to be happy, whatever happens… Do what you want.”

My sister spoke seriously, patting my narrow shoulder.

“Hmm… To be honest, I don’t really know… I’ve never thought about it that deeply…”

“How busy have you been living…? You can rest now, do whatever you want.”

“Hehe… Thanks.”

Feeling a strange sense of strength from my sister, I continued walking forward.

“So, are you going to the counseling center?”

“Hmm… I’m not sure… but I think I should… I want to be certain. Even though my body has changed, I don’t think my preferences have.”

“Yeah, it’s mostly just your body that changed…”

I decided that I should visit the counseling center and began to move.

Beep! Beep!

A small car suddenly blocked our way.


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