Not My Sins

CHAPTER NINETEEN

"But I don't want your help." She tried to push him away again but Doni simply tightened his arms around her, he was unwilling to give in to her protests.

"Let me go," She begged. "Please let me go."

"No," He declared. "You have a nasty gouge on your leg, it is enough stupidity that you chose to use a damaged swing but will you stay out here again."

"How is that your concern?" She hiccupped, "It shouldn't matter to you if I live or die, and it's not your business."

"Lady Rain, you have two options," He warned showing her two of his fingers, his other hand tightening around her almost too painfully. "It's either you follow me or I drag you back to your chambers."

"No!" she yelled finally breaking free from him, but she fell to the ground, knocking her head on the bench from the swing. "Ah…"

Doni stiffened, his eyes narrowed when he noticed she had a cut at the sides of her head, she heaved and cried again, unable to do anything he stood there and watched her with a certain irritation. He hated it when she just whined for no good reason.

"J-Just go away," She sucks in a deep breath. "I can take care of myself, it doesn't concern you if I am here in the woods with a nasty scar, I came here and I will go from here when I want to."

"It's been so long since you have been here." He started with a smug on his face, he squatted slightly, lifting her face with his thumb. "You are quite older now, and if you don't notice it you become an alluring young woman, it's not only wolves that want you now."

She shuddered at how his cold voice pierced her.

"What…"

"Even the humans on the estate will try to hurt you," He advised. "You should not put yourself in danger."

"It's still none of your business," She snapped. "I can go into the forest to look for the wolves myself or put myself in danger if I see fit. They tell me what to do inside and you also tell me what I do with my life."

"Is this because of that night?" He asked reaching for her face. "Are you scared of me?"

"Who wouldn't be?" She snickered.

"When you knew it was me why didn't you report me to the Duke?" He queried and he held her chin tightly. "You could have shown him the thread lines and he would believe you, I would be hanged for the treachery against the Duchy."

There was a brief silence, Rain's eyes searched for an excuse.

"There must be a reason you didn't tell the Duke." He pressed further. "I'm sure it's not because you were sure I wouldn't come back to finish what I started."

"Why should I tell you?"

"Because depending on your answer, I might finish what I started."

She laughed.

"Is this a threat?" She asked curiously and his eyes narrowed at her, instead of answering her with his words, he wrapped his hands around her neck, showing her he could and would kill her if provoked.

"I suggest you start talking."

"What do you want from me?" She asked curiously. "Do you want to kill me or save me? Do you care for me or hate me?"

There was a silence.

"Why don't you stick to doing one thing, if you want to kill me then do it, don't act like you are being forced to." She snapped raising her face to him, if she was going to meet the end of her fate with him then so be it.

His blue eyes went to the scar on her legs, he wasn't too deep and it didn't look so shallow as well, she had lost a good deal of blood too. Staying out more than necessary would make it infected and she could be bedridden.

"What if I apologize?" He asked curiously. "Would you forgive me?"

There was a small silence and Rain tore her face away from him sharply, he asked a question she didn't even have an answer to.

"What is your answer?" He pestered.

"I don't know." She answered. "It isn't that easy to just decide."

But she knew that she didn't hate him.

"Then tell me why, if you can't forgive me, why didn't you tell the Duke?"

There was a short silence between them, night was descended rapidly, he was right, they needed to head back before wild animals started to creep out. There was a sharp pain in her legs too, she knew it would be difficult to walk since her legs starting to sting.

Sooner or later, she might need his help.

"Because I like you." She answered, Doni froze for a bit as he stared down at the foolish girl that just confessed to him. She wasn't looking straight at him anymore, and her forehead was covered in sweat and blood from the sides of her head.

"You what?" He was surprised, that the daughter of the Duke had feelings for him. Not that he could understand the little attraction he had for her either, but he decided to blame them on his male instincts to have a beautiful woman.

He felt it was simply his lust that was the cause of the unusual yearning, there was no way he could prove it otherwise unless he had satisfied his lust.

But she was here.

Confessing to him.

"You like me?" Apart from the fact that she followed him around like a pest when they were younger, she had never proven to like him.

"Yes." She answered. "I have liked you ever since the first day that I saw you, and even after what you did to me, I can't stop liking you."

He got up.

"Give me your hand, I will carry you back." He offered but Rain remained unmoving, she wasn't ready to give him her hands, but it was already getting dark and the area was known to harbor deadly snakes. "Princess give me your hand."

"Why don't you say something?" She asked curiously, she held her skirt tightly as she prepared herself for the rejection that should come after. "Tell me I am wrong for liking you, Tell me it's inappropriate for a princess like me and that I'm dumb and stupid."

"Why should I say any of that?" He inched towards her and grabbed her hands. He forced her up, she was already too faint to fight him.

"Because that's what everyone tells me," She whispers in his chest, tears slipping from the corner of her eyes. "It's okay if you feel the same way."

He lifts her from the ground effortlessly, her body has turned cold.

"So you didn't tell the Duke because of your feelings for me?" He proceeded towards her residence. "Why?"

"He would hurt you."

"I hurt you." He defended.

"It doesn't matter." She turned her face into his chest, as she felt her consciousness drift away.

He noticed she shivered slightly, and his eyes narrowed, this shouldn't be because of the small cut on her leg, but she also had one on her forehead, and she fell on her head pretty badly.

"Why did you try to kill me?" She whispered. "I have wanted to know the answer to that, for all those years that's the question I want to ask."

Doni remained silent, there was no way he could tell her why.

"It's not just me, so you should learn to protect yourself, stay indoors." He advised. "You don't know what might happen when you wander around the plains carelessly."

"Is it because of the Duke?" She asked but got no answer, she didn't need any answer anymore, his silence had answered her question.

"Why did you stop?"

She wanted to know why he didn't complete the mission, Doni seemed hot-headed, he was determined to do whatever he wanted even if there were restrictions, so he wasn't the type to just stop out of the blue.

She knew that much.

It was pity...

he didn't kill her because he pitied her, and he knew she was innocent but sooner or later she would also be punished for the crimes of her father.

He glanced at her, her eyes were shut tightly, she was in discomfort, and she was sweating profusely. He didn't know she was so weak, her breathing had become faint and labored.

"The only reason why I didn't kill you, is because I hesitated." He said with a small frown. "My father had told me to kill without any hesitation, he said I was going to regret it if I ever killed someone I hesitated."

She was asleep, and he was sure she couldn't hear him, that was why he continued to speak.

"And I can't promise you that will be the last time," He shook his head, something stirring in his chest. "If there was another opportunity, I had promised myself that I wouldn't stop."

He suddenly stopped taking the time her colorless face in the moonlight.

"I'm sorry I can't reciprocate your feelings, Princess."