Solo For Two

If discovered, he could never set foot in France again, or he might not even escape alive. But none of that mattered to Karel anymore.‘If Sasha dies.’The life Karel had planned in America would be meaningless.Karel thought this as he used every trick he had accumulated during his espionage activities in this smuggling operation. Even if his crimes were revealed in a later investigation and he was banned from entering France for life, it was fine. As long as he could save Sasha.The three of them covered Sasha’s body with the cloth prepared for wrapping corpses. They then laid the unconscious Sasha on a prepared stretcher and leisurely exited the execution site. A guard dog at the iron gate tried to sniff the stretcher, but instead wagged its tail, sensing the scent of a living person rather than a corpse.In the carriage heading to the port, Karel read Sasha’s report, which he would soon burn and destroy completely.As he turned each page, the three weeks of detention life unfolded before his eyes.The first few days of interrogation were very simple, with Sasha bewildered. Initially, Sasha completely denied the charges. He later refused interrogation and showed a sharp attitude.[He never spoke about his ‘homeland. He continually demanded to see someone.][He skipped meals and clashed with the guards.][He reacted sensitively to being arrested on espionage charges in Austria. He couldn’t provide an alibi for the ‘letter.’]Letter?Karel decided to keep the old letter that had been left among the evidence.[Suspected to have a close relationship with the Austrian officer ‘Karel Clements.’ Claims they were only lovers but requires further interrogation.][Reacted sharply when shown information about ‘Scar.’][Continues to refuse meals.][Further investigation needed on when Scar-Karel Clements and Sasha Sedrin began their espionage activities together. Considering joint interrogation after Scar returns to the country….]After meeting with Armand, Sasha suddenly changed his attitude and readily admitted to his crimes. Crimes he didn’t commit.Karel paused for a long time at that part.Sasha testified that he had approached ‘Scar’ with the intent to extract information, and upon realizing this, Scar abandoned him. He claimed Scar saw his advances as a threat because Scar was already dedicated to France.“Burn all of this… leave no evidence.”Karel’s voice was tight with emotion.The aides nodded and took the documents. Sasha’s fabricated crimes turned into a handful of ashes and were scattered outside the carriage.Karel caressed Sasha’s face, lying peacefully and breathing softly.“Sasha, why did you go to such lengths for me?”Karel had long ago devoted his entire life to Sasha, akin to a leap of faith. He thought it didn’t matter if he didn’t receive anything in return. Such was the nature of sacrifice.“Sasha….”Karel’s shoulders trembled quietly.He thought he knew Sasha well, but it seemed he had been arrogant. He never imagined Sasha would be ready to lay down his life for him.He didn’t realize that love alone would make him so devoted.Regret flooded in for not believing in his love sooner.There was still the letter among the evidence, but Karel couldn’t muster the courage to unfold it. He carefully brought his lips to Sasha’s pale cheek. Despite the lengthy imprisonment, his skin still felt soft.Karel opened the letter next to Sasha. The rustling sound fell into Sasha’s ears.The letter was very short.Sometimes, when there is too much to say, the sentences become brief.[Karel.I am leaving briefly to attend to my duties.If you want to see me, we can meet after the war.I will be someone worth your time.Yours, Sasha.]Karel felt the sincerity hidden beneath these cautious words. He sensed the passive nature of his lover, who could rightfully have expected more.Sasha, waiting for him to come with a bouquet after the war.Throughout the post-war seasons, he must have waited for Karel’s visit, anticipating a reunion that could happen at any time.Instead of burning the final piece of evidence, Karel treasured it. He had to lower his head as tears kept wetting his cheeks. Fortunately, those in the carriage pretended not to notice.The letter was still with Karel. When they left France, he threw himself into the sea, and though the heavy uniform soaked up water, the letter was barely affected, with only slight ink smudges. Karel planned to keep this ‘evidence’ for life.The two leaned on the deck, looking at the approaching land amidst the bustling sailors.The wind was cold, and the air was damp with moisture. The reddish scratches left by the wind on Sasha’s cheeks turned a rosy hue. But he no longer felt the cold.The long voyage was finally over.＊ ＊ ＊When they arrived at the port, Sasha had left behind his prison clothes and was wearing a shirt and pants borrowed from the sailors. The clothes hung loosely on his thin frame, outlining his body as the strong wind blew. Karel brought a thin woolen blanket and draped it over Sasha’s shoulders.After the ship docked, Sasha carefully descended the iron stairs placed over the deck and stepped onto the pier.He arrived with nothing but his body and empty hands. Suddenly overwhelmed by a sinking feeling, Sasha closed his eyes tightly and then opened them again.He had already prepared himself mentally for death once. Now, he finally realized that he had regained his life. This realization brought not only excitement and relief but also a faint fear. Life doesn’t end neatly like a chapter in a novel. Sasha knew that now was the moment to fill in the blank spaces of this chapter.Sasha looked beyond the pier.Soldiers, or perhaps police officers, were standing guard at the harbor.‘They’re here to arrest me.’Sasha’s shoulders and hands trembled slightly. Behind him, Karel, who had packed a simple bag, stood next to Sasha. Without thinking, Sasha groped for Karel’s hand.“Karel, there are soldiers over there.”“……”Cold sweat trickled down Sasha’s prominent nape.Karel read the fear and tension from Sasha. The trauma from prison life and the death sentence would not easily disappear. Karel held Sasha’s hand under the blanket.“Sasha, don’t be afraid.”“……”“You’re not a criminal.”At those words, the first thing that came to Sasha’s mind was his past life.A life that had to endure harsher punishments than the crimes committed.The world had always taught Sasha harsh lessons. When he defied the shame imposed by the Grand Duke, he killed his family and had to abandon his homeland to seek the freedoms others took for granted. The media and the public, who later scandalized him, were always harsh as well. They magnified his words and forced him to live as a criminal, easily belittling him if he didn’t show them what they wanted.A life stained by misunderstandings and scandals, with no one looking beyond the surface.Sasha looked up at Karel’s face.Even Sasha, who lived with the injustice of the world, couldn’t deny one sin. This man was the only one who knew that secret, yet he was telling Sasha he wasn’t a criminal.“Karel, in Palz…”“……?”“I killed someone, a soldier…”Karel, realizing what Sasha was struggling to say, gripped his hand tightly.Karel didn’t ask if he had regained his memory. Instead, he said this:“That’s my sin.”He had already decided this when he chose to turn himself in and go to prison.“…But…”Karel slowly shook his head. He didn’t want Sasha to recount the events of that terrible day, the blood on his hands, or the attack he barely escaped from a stranger.“Then let’s call it ‘our sin.’”“……”“And we’ve already paid for it.”Karel cupped Sasha’s cold cheeks with both hands and continuously wiped away his tears. Sasha realized why his far more rational lover insisted on claiming the sin as his own.It meant: don’t blame yourself anymore.‘How many times has Karel saved my life?’If he added up all the moments he wasn’t aware of, it would be countless.Sailors, navigators, engineers, deckhands, cooks… even firemen walked past them during their ten-day voyage. The captain took off his hat, greeted them lightly, and was the last to leave the ship.Karel held Sasha’s hand and walked down the long pier. The sound of shallow waves lapping, the creaking wooden floor beneath their feet.Holding tightly to the blanket swaying in the sea breeze, Sasha reached the end of the pier. The unfamiliar soldiers were lined up and standing at the harbor. Sasha’s body tensed up with anxiety. Karel bent down slightly and whispered something in Sasha’s ear. Sasha nodded and approached them.A man adorned with several medals on his right shoulder stood at the front of the line. Sasha stood before him and, with trembling lips, spoke.“…Sasha Sedrin of French nationality, real name Aleksandr Sedrin. I request asylum.”The middle-aged man before him, an American officer, nodded.A faint smile appeared on his lips.“Sasha Sedrin, we’ve been expecting you.”＊ ＊ ＊The survival of Sasha Sedrin and his asylum in the United States soon became widely known through newspapers and radio. There had been rampant rumors about his survival since his body couldn’t be found after his execution. The public reacted with enthusiastic joy to the surprising and joyous news.Sasha’s image, arriving at the harbor in shabby clothes, was soon printed in newspapers. He was seen sitting on a makeshift chair, wearing a loose borrowed shirt, with a woolen blanket draped over his shoulders. His side profile, gazing into the distance with disheveled hair in the sea breeze, was clearly depicted.Unbeknownst to Sasha, young aristocrats in France and London began to imitate him. It became fashionable to dye their hair black, grow it out, and let it fall naturally. In clubs and pubs, you could see young men and women wearing slightly oversized dress shirts with woolen shawls. They all tried to create a naturally tousled look as if they had faced the sea breeze.Following this, American media reported that Sasha Sedrin’s asylum request was due to political persecution. At the same time, evidence emerged in Paris proving his espionage charges were false.Later, Sasha saw the names Levin and Julian among the witnesses. Esteemed scholar Julian’s support led young professors to write supportive columns. Additionally, the previously undisclosed existence of the French Secret Service came to light, leading to the dismissal of those involved. Colonel Armand had retired earlier than planned and moved to the countryside in central France. It was an early decline for a man aiming for the position of Marshal of France.Karel weighed Armand on the scales of justice, measuring the weight of his vengeance.Although he had suffered because of Armand, he had also gained a second life instead of being executed while in captivity, which could be attributed to him as well.After much time spent pondering Armand’s punishment for both his own and Sasha’s sake, Karel decided to let the scales find their own balance. In time, they would tilt one way or another, or perhaps achieve a lasting equilibrium.As public opinion swayed dramatically, both Austria and France charged Karel with espionage. His identity had been revealed during the process of helping Sasha enter and seek asylum.As a result, Karel underwent a two-week investigation and a month-long trial upon his return to the United States.Had the trial taken place in France or Austria, Karel would have faced the harshest sentence. However, the situation in the U.S. was different. The Ludwig family’s influence, having moved their capital to the U.S. long before the war, played a significant role. Julian secretly lobbied for the trial without revealing his connection to Karel, and several high-priced lawyers took on Karel’s defense.The jury unanimously supported Karel, acknowledging that his espionage was forced upon him to prolong his life, not his own will.The final verdict was not guilty.At the moment of the verdict, Karel focused on a specific spot in the spacious courtroom.In the second-floor gallery, a man dressed in a luxurious dark gray suit and wearing a hat was quietly watching him. Sasha had attended all of Karel’s trials without revealing his presence.Karel did not feel greatly troubled by the trials and investigations he had to endure. It was merely a minor annoyance. It wasn’t just because he anticipated the trial’s outcome; he had a strong tendency to view his own suffering as if it were someone else’s. Having experienced numerous extreme hardships that most people couldn’t fathom, he had become overly desensitized to stress.However, when he saw Sasha’s anxious face as he left home or his relief when he returned safely…Karel knew now that his life was no longer just his own.The charges of being a political criminal, the public’s scorn, and the prosecutor’s recitation of his crimes did not bother Karel. Only Sasha’s trembling eyes saddened him.Five years ago, the memory of watching Sasha, imagining he would endure 25 summers alone, resurfaced suddenly.‘It’s over now.’Karel finally felt that his sentence had ended. And at the same time, he felt great relief—not for his own safety but because Sasha no longer had to worry.As the judge declared the court adjourned, people began to leave one by one. Karel shook hands with the lawyers and prosecutors leaving the courtroom and looked up at the gallery once more. The man who had been sitting there a moment ago was gone.As Karel was looking around, he heard a familiar voice from the door.“Karel…!”Sasha had quickly come down to the first floor of the courtroom and was standing at the door. The young lawyer Karel had last shaken hands with glanced at Sasha with curiosity and amazement.“Is that Sasha Sedrin by any chance…?”“Yes, it is.”“It’s true, then, that you are friends!”Karel neither confirmed nor denied the term ‘friends’ and simply smiled at the lawyer. Then he walked with him to the door. The lawyer seemed eager to be introduced to Sasha. Used to this, Karel approached the door and called out to Sasha, who had been staring at him.“Sasha…?”Karel quietly ‘woke’ him. Sasha often zoned out even while looking at Karel. If Karel hadn’t ‘woken’ him beforehand, Sasha would have run over and hugged him tightly.“Sasha Sedrin! Nice to meet you. I’ve heard so much about you.”“Oh…”“This is one of the lawyers who helped with the trial from start to finish. And this is….”“Yes, I know well. Sasha Sedrin! If you ever need help, please contact me. Whether it’s a prosecution or being detained… Ah, no, I hope you won’t have to contact me for such reasons….”Sasha smiled at the babbling lawyer. He reached out to the lawyer, who was fumbling to find his business card. Though Sasha reached out to receive the card, the lawyer shook his hand enthusiastically with both hands.“Please contact me!”“Okay. I hope I’ll have the chance to seek your help….”The lawyer was overjoyed by Sasha’s polite words and left the courtroom. He turned around three times to bow as he departed.As his figure disappeared, Karel suddenly spoke.“He forgot to give his business card.”“Indeed.”The two of them quietly laughed as they slowly left the courthouse.Stepping out the door, they were greeted by the sun shining brightly and a gentle breeze blowing.“The weather is warm, Karel.”Sasha reached out to Karel. His fingertips were cold, so Karel held his hand tightly and put it in his pocket.Just a while ago, when they had arrived at the U.S. harbor, the wind had been sharp, but now it was already warm and sunny. Sasha had regained his appetite and health and looked much better. Though Sasha still occasionally experienced hallucinations and delusions, the frequency had significantly decreased compared to before.Recently, advancements in psychiatric research had led to treatments like medication and electroshock therapy. However, Sasha had not undergone any such treatments. Julian had advised against being swayed by new treatments. He had expressed concern about unforeseen side effects or complications after observing experimental cases conducted by fellow scholars and medical doctors. Karel followed Julian’s advice, as he always made the most rational decisions.Karel also knew that Sasha’s illness was more about finding fault within himself rather than harming others. As long as it was a non-aggressive mental illness, caring for Sasha wouldn’t be too difficult. The only problem was that it broke Karel’s heart to see Sasha blame himself.As they walked out a bit farther, a luxurious car of the latest design was parked outside the courthouse. Karel checked his watch. The car had arrived precisely on time as promised, without a minute’s delay.As expected, Georg was sitting in the car, leaning against the window and eating ice cream. Although he had a sulky expression, Sasha, who knew that this was his usual look when not putting on a formal, business-like face, no longer paid much attention to his inner thoughts.“My goodness… You’re the last one out of everyone in the courtroom?”It wasn’t just his expression that Georg had regained since coming to America. His original easygoing and joking nature was also starting to reappear.“I told you there was no need to come. You’re not my secretary anymore….”Karel said this while opening the backseat door. Sasha got in first, followed by Karel. Georg grumbled at Karel’s comment.“Who do you think made me come to America?”“I didn’t tell you to come.”“Are you telling me to dedicate my life to that rotten military?”Even though he couldn’t go back. But Karel chuckled without making any further comment.Georg had recently had to leave the Austrian military due to the charge of aiding Karel, a political prisoner, as his closest aide. In reality, it was hardly a punishment. It could have been minimized thanks to his family name and the cartel formed among the upper class.As he drove away from the courthouse, Georg expounded on how, in this rapidly changing world, clinging to noble blood and a meaningless title guaranteed nothing. His passion was so intense that the ice cream he held in one hand had melted and was dripping out the window.In any case, there was no flaw in Georg’s argument. After the war that had swept through Europe, both the Allied and Axis powers were suffering severe aftereffects, and the nobility was no exception. Seeing noblemen selling off their castles and lands as they declined, or losing their heirs who were sent to war, Georg seemed to have realized something.During the war, the United States had risen as a new superpower, selling weapons and various military supplies. Georg, while swearing loyalty to Karel, had his own calculations in mind.“Anyway, you two are responsible for me now, right?”At Georg’s shameless words, Sasha burst into laughter. He suddenly recalled Georg barging into the mansion, demanding to be taken care of.“Why are you laughing, Captain?”“I wasn’t laughing at you. More than that, can you stop calling me Captain now….”“Then what should I call you?”“Well, how about Mr. Clements?”“That doesn’t sound great.”Despite saying this, Georg immediately followed Karel’s suggestion.It was ironic that Georg, a nobleman, had decided to serve a commoner officer as his lifelong superior. However, it was also a natural outcome. Having been trained as a soldier from a young age, Georg had a deep-seated desire to serve a respectable superior.He truly believed that by becoming Karel’s right-hand man, he could experience a new world that he had never seen before. Although he had never expressed it in words.Georg smiled secretly to himself.“Oh, by the way, Levin said he needs a bit more time to cross over with her family on the same ship. There are issues with her parents’ health and his siblings’ jobs….”“If there’s anything they need, tell them to let us know. I’ll cover the expenses….”Georg nodded at Sasha’s words.Levin, who had ten family members, including her parents and eight siblings, was also preparing to immigrate to America. The belief that she could never escape the slums had recently been shattered, and she had found new hope, thanks entirely to her employer, Sasha, and his friends Julian, Karel, and Georg.“I can’t wait to see Charles.”“Charles feels the same way.”Sasha lightly rested his head on Karel’s shoulder.The car smoothly crossed a long bridge. When they entered the city after crossing the narrow stretch of sea, Sasha gently lifted his head from Karel’s shoulder. The one-lane road, forming a square, often got congested, making it easy for passersby to look into the car. Understanding Sasha’s reluctance, Karel held Sasha’s hand, which was resting haphazardly inside the seat.Soon, the car stopped near a green plaza, in front of a luxury hotel. As they entered the lavish lobby decorated with marble columns and flags, the bellboys who recognized the car approached.While the hotel bellboy opened the door, Sasha got out of the car first.“We’ll leave the car with the hotel.”“Alright.”At Georg’s words, Karel nodded briefly. A hotel staff member then took the car keys and drove the car to the parking lot.“Um… so, what are your plans for the near future?”From Georg’s question, Karel vaguely realized something. It was time to set a new direction for their lives, beyond just immediate plans.They had been rushing forward non-stop for years, with a life purpose imposed by others rather than chosen by themselves. Now, facing this newfound freedom felt unfamiliar to Karel.And it seemed the same was true for Georg.“Well… we won’t be doing anything until we’ve gathered our thoughts, so you should get plenty of rest too.”“Understood. I’ll contact you at the hotel if anything comes up.”“Alright.”“It won’t be long, will it?”“Probably not.”“Captain… no, Mr. Clements needs a break too. Both of you should rest well together.”Saying this, Georg also greeted Sasha, who was waiting at the entrance, before heading into the lobby.When Karel nodded, Georg walked away with light steps, soon blending in with the pedestrians. Lately, Georg seemed to be spending his days in a whirlwind of excitement and adventure, exploring the new city. The sense of liberation from finally having a break was evident in his stride.“Let’s go in,” Karel said, guiding Sasha into the hotel. He planned to take his time to think about their future.It was clear that Sasha’s presence would greatly influence Karel’s decisions about what to live for. Realizing this again, Karel wondered what he had been thinking about before meeting Sasha.At twenty-one, Karel Clements had dreamt of a simple life.That part of him felt distant and faint, almost like a stranger.“Karel?” Sasha called out again, snapping Karel out of his thoughts as they stood in the elevator heading to the upper floors of the hotel. Now, away from prying eyes, Karel wrapped his arm around Sasha’s waist.Even though he had lived deceiving himself, Karel had long known his true nature.Cunning, calculative, obsessive, and with an ambition that was almost terrifyingly large. Despite his excessive self-love, he had consciously ignored these traits, fearing that acknowledging them would lead to a life of inferiority and victimhood. This self-deception was so effective that even those around him praised Karel as an unselfish and sacrificial friend. Karel himself had thought he wouldn’t regret living a plain life forever.That was until he met Sasha.“Will you shower first?” Sasha asked as they entered the penthouse, with its neatly arranged bedding and comfortable furniture. Karel felt the warmth of Sasha’s sun-kissed skin and his scent as Sasha kissed his cheek.“No, I’m fine. Do you want to go first?”“Thanks,” Sasha said, as Karel helped him take off his hat and jacket and sent him to the bathroom.But the result of that long self-denial…Karel walked over to the window and stood there for a moment, looking down at the city.A sense of liberation washed over him, one that went beyond simply being free from guilt or escaping the clutches of the state that had choked him. It was a slow sensation that gradually seeped into his entire being.This was likely the liberation that came from ending denial and acknowledging his true self.While working as a spy, Karel had funneled business funds into third-party countries, amassing a substantial slush fund. In the end, he had been loyal neither to Austria nor France. Even when cornered in life, Karel had calculatedly and tenaciously secured his share, without a shred of guilt.Colonel Armand, who had tried to use him; Georg, to whom he had sworn loyalty; and Madame Rambouillet, who approached him with a mix of calculation and pure hope—Karel had not opened his heart to any of them and had maximized his ‘use’ of them.Karel felt this was closer to his true self: inherently unwilling to suffer losses, wanting to get back what he invested.Perhaps only Julian, his sworn brother, had understood this early on. Julian’s reluctance to step back when Karel wanted something the most was likely due to his fear of Karel’s eventual downfall due to his ambition. Julian had always worried about Karel’s potential for self-destruction.Then, he felt a familiar warmth from behind.Karel paused for a moment but then held Sasha’s arms, which were wrapped around him. He felt Sasha rest his cheek against his back. Sasha didn’t call out to him but simply leaned on him quietly.Maybe he had repeated the same behavior in love.‘If I invest sincerely, I’ll get it back eventually. If I make them owe me, they won’t be able to leave me.’With such thoughts.In the end, he had successfully brainwashed Sasha into believing in eternal love and had made him owe him a debt of the heart. Was all of this truly innocent?…His love was too immense to give up on being loved in return.‘An excuse.’Karel sneered at himself.But what could he do? He was originally such a despicable person.“You’ve been quiet since earlier,” Sasha said.“…Now that it’s all over, it feels somewhat empty.”Sasha silently sat next to him.Seeing Karel overlooking the massive city from the penthouse filled Sasha with a faint sense of dread. Karel’s back, as he looked down on the city, seemed indescribably empty and lonely. This made Sasha instinctively hold onto him from behind.Sasha remembered Karel’s back.The back of Scar, who had coldly abandoned him in the bustling streets of Paris. But now he saw that Scar’s pretentious and sinister demeanor was just a twisted mask.Sasha thought that the figure he had just seen might be the real Karel. The back that bore loneliness while standing alone.Although Sasha didn’t know exactly what guilt Karel was struggling with, he felt compassion and stayed by his side for a long time.＊ ＊ ＊Instead of going out and attracting attention, the two had an early dinner in their room via room service.They then browsed through newspapers and magazines, clipping out articles about famous restaurants or renowned exhibitions they wanted to visit. Sasha showed particular interest in hiking and camping. Knowing that Sasha was reminiscing about their summer vacation by the lake in the Palatinate, Karel added that to their near-future plans.They talked about what they wanted to do during this break that felt like a vacation. Enjoying a peaceful evening, Sasha kept insisting that he would be satisfied with just one drink, so Karel had no choice but to order a half-bottle of wine.