chapter 48
My ■■■ (7)
Crash!!
Lilia’s greeting of reunion started with a rough kick.
For a moment, I stepped back from the kick that seemed to pierce with all its might.
I realized that it was not as hard to withstand that power as it used to be.
“Surely, the condition was to have a conversation if we survived.”
Isn’t this a bit unfair?
“That can’t be. That, that is, it doesn’t make sense… That can’t be!!”
Despite my sarcasm, Lilia started to spout only words of denial as if she were in a state of confusion.
Seeing her eyes tremble with tears, it was obvious what she was thinking.
“Why, are you worried that something might have happened to Eremus?”
“You b*stard!!”
It seemed that he suspected something had happened to Eremus rather than believing that I had overcome the erosion.
Knowing that Eremus was about to die, he was suddenly terrified.
In fact, his complexion was as pale as could be. He was trembling with anxiety.
“Don’t worry. There’s nothing wrong with Eremus. The disappearance of the erosion means that he forgave me and made a request.”
I have no taste for tormenting children, nor do I intend to joke about matters of life and death. So I spoke honestly.
Of course…
“…Don’t be ridiculous. There’s no way Dad would ask a hypocrite like you for anything!”
“I don’t have much credibility, do I?”
Whether he believed it was another matter.
I didn’t expect him to believe it straightforwardly in the first place.
Bang!
His fierce attack poured towards me again.
A kick derived from overwhelming strength and agility pushed my sword away and shoved me back. But it wasn’t as suffocating as before.
“You know by now, don’t you? It’s about time to go back.”
“Shut uuup!!”
Boom!
Poisonous energy began to erupt from his body as if it were exploding. It was his full power, which he hadn’t shown until now.
Watching that, I felt more joy than a sense of crisis.
I had become an opponent that he had to use his full strength against.
I could feel that fact.
“I don’t have the confidence to look after a child here. …Shall we give it a try?”
How should one soothe a stubborn child and break their will?
Normally, the simplest way would be to grant the child’s request.
If that doesn’t work, then calmly explain why it can’t be done.
But neither option seems possible right now.
Eremus’s decision is a kind of conviction that will never be overturned. And most importantly, he doesn’t listen to a word I say.
Because I have escaped the erosion.
The source of the hatred that resides within him is shaking.
His hatred stems not from himself, but from Eremus.
There’s no way he doesn’t understand the meaning of Eremus taking the erosion away from me.
“I’ll play along with your stubbornness until you calm down.”
So my job is to exhaust his burning emotions.
Nothing has changed from the beginning.
I move based on the strength I gauged while blocking his attacks.
I realized that the fundamental power within me had greatly changed.
This power is a kind of path connected to numerous gods.
But it wasn’t enough.
As expected, I still can’t exert as much power as the Saint. I’m only at the starting point now.
Crack!
I block his attack with my sword. This time, I didn’t just rely on the sword’s durability.
I let his power flow to one side and pass by.
In the past, the difference in power was so great that I couldn’t even attempt it.
Whoosh!
I swung my sword as I entered his range.
Unfortunately, the sword given by my master still can’t contain divine power.
Therefore, the sword that should have cut his flesh still sliced through the air.
Bang!
Right after our positions crossed, I pulled the trigger behind me before turning to check.
“Ugh!”
Even without checking, I knew I had dealt significant damage this time.
Not only the total amount of divine power I possessed but also its quality was different.
So it wasn’t difficult to create bullets of divine power that he couldn’t deflect.
Bang! Bang!
Did he realize he couldn’t deflect them anymore?
The guy who had been taking most attacks with his body finally started to take a defensive stance.
The poison emanating from his entire body corroded the bullets of divine power in the air as if crushing them.
The surging energy transformed into a natural fortress that blocked any approach.
Isn’t it quite a power? Until now, he was definitely playing around.
But…
“What?!”
The power I received from Eremus to withstand the ‘erosion’ is meaningless to me.
I brush aside the veil of poison with my bare hands. It feels like I can exert physical force similar to telekinesis, but the essence lies in the poison itself.
I brush aside the force that reached out as if to block my body with one hand and ignore it, swinging my sword again.
“Ugh?!”
It was the same attack as before.
The ordinary sword strike, without any divine power or even mana, startled the opponent, and they dodged in surprise.
There are two possibilities.
Either they can’t use more than two powers at once, or they judged that there might be something and dodged for now.
In any case, it’s certain that they are being cornered.
Their nape must have turned cold.
So, the heat that had risen to their head must have cooled down a bit.
Of course, the hatred would still be there. The suspicion would still be there. To prove myself, I must subdue them.
Talking in a situation where I could kill them immediately. That would add credibility to my words.
“I’m not yet great enough to be called a hero.”
Am I strong now?
Of course, I would be stronger than before. But compared to the scenery I was looking at, I’m still far off.
I’ve only just stood at the starting point.
The reason I can now take the upper hand is not a great one.
“I can beat someone like you.”
Because I am the ultimate counter to someone who fights with poison.
They are practically fighting me with their hands and feet tied.
Their vaunted strength and agility are insignificant compared to the power of ‘erosion’.
That’s why. They say erosion can no longer harm me, so how can they face me with a power that is still a lower version of ‘erosion’?
To think that I still can’t overwhelm an opponent who only has physical means of attack.
I am a worthless person.
For now.
Crack!
Since I decided to act on her behalf, what has changed in me?
I don’t feel particularly stronger in terms of physical strength or skill. Maybe it’s just that I’ve been freed from the long-standing shackle called ‘erosion’, but I haven’t actually gotten stronger.
What has changed is how I will respond to what will come before my eyes.
That mindset.
“How long do you plan to keep running away?”
“What…?”
The actual power, the divine power.
I start using that power in earnest.
By sending it through the bullet, I already knew the approximate range of my power.
Until now, it was just a preliminary skirmish to find a way to not kill him, but also not be too weak.
“Even if you close your eyes because you don’t want to see it, what’s already in front of you won’t disappear.”
“……”
The saintess used to soar through the sky with her pure white wings. That sight felt like it symbolized her.
Then what about me?
She approached people with compassion.
She empathized with and understood their wounds, bearing their weight together.
But I won’t do that. I can’t be the same as her.
I will strive to do what she could, but there is not only one path.
If she approached people with mercy and compassion, I will physically correct those who are on the wrong path and guide them to the right one.
Even if my hands get scraped and bleed while holding the leash of a lamb running full speed towards a cliff, I will stop it.
Actions speak louder than a thousand words. If so, I will prove my way with a thousand actions.
If words alone can’t move people’s hearts, I will gladly take action.
Crackle!
Jupiter’s lightning. The divine magic I learned while admiring the saintess.
I pour out that most familiar power.
The spear that flew like a single arrow now flies like a pouring rain to catch the one in front of me.
He skillfully dodged each falling lightning bolt.
Not only is he agile, but now I see he is also exceptionally flexible.
“How long can you keep running away?”
Can you dodge all the falling lightning? Can you keep turning a blind eye to the inevitable future that is coming soon?
He is getting exhausted. I can see his breath getting heavier just from dodging, let alone attacking.
“This is your last chance, Lilia.”
He will be out of breath. So I withdrew the storming lightning.
The conditions are finally met.
Even to catch his breath, he has no choice but to accept this lull. Whether he will talk or not, I don’t know. He can just keep ignoring me. But it’s enough for me to just talk to him.
“Eremus is dying. Are you going to keep wandering around here? Are you going to let him face the end alone?”
“Shut up!”
I just need to corner him with words he can’t help but react to.
“You ran away because you hated it, didn’t you? Shouting that it’s a lie, trying to ignore reality?”
“Dad isn’t dying…”
“No, Eremus is dying soon. You know that, don’t you?”
“Soon? No, that won’t happen. Dad isn’t bound by time.”
“So you kept running away?”
“……”
I finally understood him.
The reason he decided to run away. The truth is, he wanted to be together.
But he deliberately avoided it.
As she said, Eremus is no longer bound by time.
Seeing that he even invaded my soul, which has already returned, that must be an undeniable fact.
But that’s why Lilia had hope.
Because she knew why Eremus was facing death.
“You thought if you kept running away, he would reverse his death?”
“……”
It’s for her. For her, who couldn’t handle the increasingly strong poison of Eremus.
So that the daughter born from his hatred wouldn’t follow the same path.
But that’s why Lilia thought that if she disappeared, Eremus would have no reason to die.
He must have been hoping for that. If they stayed apart like this, there would be no reason for him to risk death for Lilia.
Going round and round, for the sake of his parents.
“Is that bad…?”
“……”
Lilia, who was hit in the heart, started to sob. Seeing that, I couldn’t dare say it was wrong either.
He knew.
He knew everything.
Knowing that he was being unreasonable, and understanding his parents’ feelings.
He made this decision with full awareness of everything.
Yes, how could a child easily accept the death of a parent?
A child would do anything to save their parent if there was a way.
Parents and children had the same thoughts. So they ended up on different paths.
Who would bend first?
It was a kind of chicken game that wouldn’t end until one side gave up.
A choice where they had to lay down their own life to save the other’s.
“Eremus wouldn’t want to see you die.”
“And what about me? I don’t want to see you die, Dad! Why? Why do you have to die?!”
“To protect you.”
“I don’t care about that. I don’t understand….”
This was a situation where neither side could be said to be right.
If Eremus didn’t die, an uncontrollable power would spread out into the world and consume everything.
For humanity, it was the worst choice. But it couldn’t be forced upon the child standing before them.
How could they tell the child to accept their parent’s death for the sake of the world?
“Eremus, you see.”
He would die.
Even if he wanted to die, he couldn’t do it immediately. He had spent countless hours slowly killing himself.
All those countless hours. The happy moments spent with his daughter.
He gave up everything for his daughter.
But there was something he couldn’t do anything about.
“He must be feeling lonely.”
Yes, he couldn’t endure the loneliness. Not in the past, not now, and not in the future.
“Ah, ugh….”
Lilia finally started to cry her eyes out. She knew the feeling of loneliness all too well.
The only family she had in this world.
Eremus gave up his life for that family.
Lilia ran away because she didn’t want that family to die.
“For now, it might be okay. If you stay away, he might change his mind and decide to live.”
In the end, Eremus might give up on death, following Lilia’s insistence.
But if that happens, can the two of them truly be happy?
“But you won’t be able to approach Eremus. When that time comes, you too won’t be able to withstand Eremus’s erosion.”
If they go back like this, Eremus will die. If they don’t go back, they will lose the chance to be together forever.
The last image Eremus will remember of Lilia is her shouting at him and running away.
“Are you planning to let Eremus spend that long, painful, lonely time alone?”
Both of them will be lonely.
On the other hand, if Lilia goes back like this, Eremus won’t be lonely at the last moment.
This is forcing a sacrifice.
But at the same time, this is the only salvation she can offer.
“Ahhh!!”
Lilia, who had been shedding endless tears, screams.
Then, as if responding to her sorrow, the poison spreads widely.
A power born from loneliness and hatred. Therefore, it reacts strongly to emotions.
“If it continues like this, you will regret it.”
She reaches out her hand.
She must stop him. That’s what she decided to do.
Even if she gets hit while hugging the rampaging child from behind, she must stop him.
“Living a life full of regrets is the same as living dead. In the end, you either overcome it or sink.”
I don’t need wings.
I don’t need to float in the sky like the saint and connect everyone.
So, gods of the pantheon, if you are listening to my prayer, please grant my small request.
What I need is not wings.
“So at least face each other. Face each other and talk. Even if you throw a tantrum, do it where you can be seen.”
What I need is chains that can stop the lost lamb.
Clang!
Pure white chains spring out from the air and entangle Lilia’s limbs.
Like a snake wrapping around, it suppresses her power from the source.
“That’s the only way to understand each other.”
Blood flows from her palm.
Even though I wasn’t directly holding the chain, it felt that way.
A stigmata was engraved on my palm. I didn’t mind.
This blood is the blood I willingly decided to shed to stop the lost and fleeing lambs.
* * *
For a while, I suppressed him. He poured all his strength as if to pour out all his emotions.
All I did was provide a place and medium to receive that strength.
I didn’t directly attack and incapacitate him.
“It hurts.”
“Yeah.”
There are no physical injuries.
Even if there were, it would only be a small part scraped by the chain. So I had no way of knowing where he was hurting.
Surely, it must be a pain that I couldn’t understand.
“I miss my dad.”
“Yeah…….”
He said it as if he was spitting it out.
And then he seemed to chew on it several times.
“Dad…… I miss my dad so much……. I’m so lonely…….”
He started to sob.
“Then you should go see him.”
“Yeah.”
“Surely, Eremus will welcome you with a smile.”
“Yeah…….”
The tyrant who disturbed Rubia is no more. Now, the one curling up here is just a kid whining to his parents.
“I’ll somehow take care of your mistakes. You just need to apologize and bow your head.”
“Thank…… Thank you.”
The kid is already reflecting.
I listened to his confession.
Then, as a clergyman, I should bear that sin.
Because that’s the responsibility and price I have to bear for twisting fate.