How Not to Be a Dark Lord

I was tied up with some strange rope and bruised all over, being dragged across the rough sand road. We finally made it to the next town over, which conveniently happened to be one stop away from this "Magic School."

I would shout something, but she even shut my mouth with some kind of isekai duct tape. Scarlet was making sure to keep her distance whilst holding the end of the rope, possibly to dissociate herself from me, even though everyone could tell we were traveling together.

A mother quickly covered her son's eyes, and the other villagers gave looks of disgust.

"No, Timmy, you don't want to see this. It's not appropriate."

"What? But isn't that what uncle wanted to try with m-"

She hushed the boy very quickly and took him away.

 

Man. This is just humiliating. I was just joking earlier, but she really made a big fuss about it. I just hope we get to school today.

 

"If you're thinking about hoping we get to school today, then you're in luck. It's starting to come to view."

Scarlet pointed toward something in the distance I couldn't possibly see because I'm flat on the ground.

"At this rate, we'll make it there really quickly. There's nothing that can stop us now. We're almost there. Geez, I'm so glad that nothing bad happened to stop us."

 

The moment she finished her sentence, a small ninja hopped onto her back and started pummeling the back of her head, causing her to let go of the rope.

Immediately, I stood up and got to work untying myself.

 

Man. This is such a hassle! I need a knife or something to fix this... whoops!

 

I slipped. On my way down, the ropes grazed a nearby sword, freeing me for good.

"Ow. Well, at least that's done."

I looked up to see another ninja (just barely taller than me, but for the ladies, I am as tall as you want me to be), wielding a katana above my head. Aaaaaa. This is... bad.

 

How do I get out of this?

"Erm, well, this is awkward! Thanks for the help!"

I grabbed a handful of sand off the floor and threw it all into his eyes, though I blinded myself in the process as well. I forgot that the sand would scatter.

 

The sound of the sword swinging multiple times combined with the lack of searing pain usually associated with being sliced told me that he was just as blind as me. I rolled around on the floor like a convenience store hotdog on a grill, trying to escape whilst rubbing my eyes.

But when I finally managed to open them again, the battle was over. Scarlet had taken down both of the ninjas, carrying their heads in each hand.

"Tell me. Who sent you?"

"W-we're not telling you anything! First rule of ninja code! Never tell any secrets!"

The smaller ninja pipped up. On closer inspection, she seemed to be more like a little girl. The other ninja chimed in soon after.

"Quiet, you imbecile! You already broke the first rule!"

"Oops! But at least I didn't break the second! Always knock before entering the boss' room!"

"The two of you, silence! If you aren't going to tell me, then I might as well dispose of you both..."

 

Gulp (the sound came from both of them).

 

...

 

Scarlet and I finished listening to their stories. They were on their knees, fists clenched and rested on their thighs. Their names were Elise and Elliot, newbie ninjas working for some guy named Don Disgrace.

"So you're expecting me to believe that this 'Don Disgrace' guy exists?" <-- me speaking

"Y-yes. He's the secret boss of us ninja, and you know how us ninja have our secrets. He's so secret that even his existence was unknown to his own parents."

"Elise, we're going to be in even more trouble if you keep telling stuff like that! Plus, those were rumors!"

 

Clearly, this was going nowhere. What is there to do with this information? We're just wasting time not getting to school.

"If you're thinking that we're just wasting ti-"

"Just get to the point already!"

 

Scarlet was a little upset about that. Nevertheless, she sighed and continued on.

"Don Disgrace. I actually have heard of that name before. I don't know a lot, but he has a big hold on the underground business. If I could meet him, then there's a possibility we can find what you need."

"Ugh, fine. I really don't want to, but if it stops me from getting executed..."

 

She shifted her attention back to the ninjas. Apparently, they would prove to be useful (according to her).

"Elise, you will assist Boles in his undercover mission. Do you understand?"

"Yup!"

 

"And Eliott, you seem more capable. Lead me to the boss. I don't want to hear any excuses, because I can and will make this as difficult as it needs to be."

In response, he sighed and reluctantly nodded his head.

 

"But for now, the four of us will meet with the principal first. Let's get a move on."

 

And with that, we gained two new party members.

 

 

 

Don Disgrace, huh?

 

Hmm...

 

That name.

 

...

 

Don.

 

...

 

Don Boles.

I like that. Has a nice ring to it.